


Influenced Out of Normality

by BakenandEggs



Series: Influenced Out of Normality [1]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Character Bashing, F/M, Gen, Real Family, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-13
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 04:31:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 105,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9701804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BakenandEggs/pseuds/BakenandEggs
Summary: The last thing Xander Harris expected to find out was that he was adopted. Well, no, Xander was pretty sure that the knowledge that Tony Stark was his real father was a hundred times more unexpected than that.





	1. InformatION

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KakarikiKiwi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KakarikiKiwi/gifts), [DarkGhana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkGhana/gifts).



> Welcome to 'Influenced Out of Normality'. This story was dreamed up me and two of my sisters, Kakariki and DarkGhana, when we were camping February 2016 (we live in the NZ, so February is out Summer). I, Bakenandeggs, then went home and, when I'd finally finished writing my 'Harry Potter in the Claw of the Raven' series, wrote this. It's been a long time coming for all three of us and we are super excited to be sharing it with you.
> 
> (Though we should probably warn you that there is a little bit of Buffy/Willow/Giles bashing in this story - just in case that's the sort of thing that upsets you.)
> 
> This story is beta'd by Kakariki, and is dedicated to both her and DarkGhana.

“Sir?”

  


Tony tuned out JARVIS’ voice as he concentrated on undoing the screws that attached the Fuel Sending Unit to the engine of the 1957 Chevrolet Bel Aire that he was working on. The concentration wasn’t really necessary, even if the screws were damn hi-torque screws, but it seemed like JARVIS had spent the last...however many hours he’d been working on the car, interrupting him with bad news and Tony really didn’t want to hear about yet another way that Obie had completely screwed him over.

When he’d gotten the screws out, Tony stuck the screwdriver in his mouth and yanked out the Fuel Sending Unit, tossing it over his shoulder for Dum-E to clean away. He grimaced down at the engine and grabbed a rag to wipe up some of the grease and grime so he could see what he was dealing with. 

  


He didn’t spend a lot of time fixing up old cars. Where was the innovation in restoring something to how it had been before? He preferred improving top of the line cars. There was something satisfying in finding new ways to make the cars faster. Not to mention that restoring old cars seemed like a waste if his, not inconsiderable, genius and skill. Anyone with a screw driver could fix a car - Tony Stark built robots.

  


In fact, the only other time he’d ever attempted to restore a car had been nineteen years ago when his parents had died. After the police officers had brought him the news of his parents’ accident, he’d wandered down to Howard’s garage and had found his father’s latest project - a 1967 Ford Mustang - halfway restored. It had seemed like a decent enough distraction and, he’d spent the four days before the funeral finishing what his father had started. He still had the car, locked at the back of his garage at his parents’ mansion in New York, but it hadn’t been driven since the day of the funeral.

  


Obie might not have been Tony’s parent, though there had definitely been days that Tony had wished he had been, and he might have attempted to kill Tony multiple times, but restoring an old car seemed like the best way to deal with the fact that he was gone. So he’d had JARVIS buy him an old car the day after he’d killed Obie.

  


Tony had no idea what he was going to do to help him deal with the fact that the closest thing he’d had to family in the last twenty years had been responsible for his three months in an Afghanistan cave - though, drinking himself into stupor seemed like a good option.

  


“Sir?”

  


Tony sighed and let go of the cylinder head with his left hand so that he could remove the screwdriver from his mouth. “What’s up?”

  


“I have come across some information amongst Mister Stane’s files that I believe you would wish brought to your attention.” 

  


Tony scowled down at the engine in front of him before grabbing a nearby cloth and beginning to wipe the grease off his hands. 

  


“Do I need to look at it? Or can you just give me the overview?” He asked, moving out the garage as he continued to wipe grease off his hands. Maybe it was time to eat something. “What’s the time?”

  


“It is two thirty six in the morning.” JARVIS answered faithfully. “The date is the 28th of March 2010.”

  


“Huh.” Tony wiped at his face with the greasy cloth, he was pretty sure that the last time he’d eaten had been on the the 26th - the day after he’d killed Obie (and the day he’d announced to the world that he was Iron Man) - though, he vaguely remembered Dum-E shoving a smoothie in his face. Had he drunken it? 

  


“Miss Potts has asked me to remind you that the press conference regarding Mister Stane’s disappearance is scheduled for one thirty this afternoon.” JARVIS continued, his voice switching from speaker to speaker to keep up with Tony as he made his way up the stairs. “She has arranged for Mister Hogan to pick you up at one.”

  


“That’s today? What’s the cover story again?”

  


“Mister Stane’s private aeroplane was reported to have disappeared while he was vacationing in Tahiti.” JARVIS answered. “There was an extensive search of the area, but a piece of the wreckage was found washed up on one of the beaches yesterday morning.”

  


“Have they called off the search yet?” Tony reached the top of the stairs and tried not to look at the couch that he’d been sitting on when Obie had pulled out his arc-reactor. “Hey, JARVIS? I think it’s time we redecorated in here? Maybe a new colour scheme? Red and gold, maybe?”

  


“Of course, sir.” JARVIS’ tone was dry. “I will pass your request on to Miss Potts.” 

  


“Good idea.” Tony agreed, stopping to glance around the room. “Tell her I want fish - they make red and gold fish, don’t they?”

  


“They do, sir.” JARVIS confirmed. “Regarding the search and rescue operation that is currently underway for Mister Stane: while they have not yet called off the search, the chances of Mister Stane being found alive are believed to be very slim.” 

  


Tony snorted as he made his way to the kitchen. “No kidding. Is there anything food around?”

  


“I believe that Mrs. Huerta placed a casserole in the refrigerator for you, sir. She asked me to tell you that she and her family are praying for the safe return of Mister Stane.”

  


Tony threw open the fridge door, before retrieving the the only container that could possibly hold a casserole. There was a note on the top of it explaining how to reheat it. “Do I know Mrs. Huerta, JARVIS?”

  


“Yes, sir.” JARVIS answered, his tone disapproving. “She is the woman that Miss Potts hired to clean the house.”

  


“Ah,” Tony nodded, as he placed the container into his microwave to reheat it. “Short woman? Smiles a lot? Old? Pepper’s way of punishing me for sleeping with the last one?”

  


“She is four years and seven months younger than you, sir.”

  


“I prefered the last one.” 

  


“So I gathered, sir.” JARVIS’ tone was disapproving again.

  


“Well, tell her thanks, will you?” Tony asked. “Not the last one, I can’t even remember her name, but this Mrs. Huerta. Not for the prayers, hell, I can’t imagine anything worse than Obie being alive after all, but for the food.”

  


“Of course, sir.” JARVIS agreed. 

  


Tony watched as the casserole dish spun around in the microwave, before making his way towards the coffee maker that he knew would contain hot and fresh coffee. Hooking the coffee maker up to JARVIS had been one of the best ideas that he had ever had.

  


“So what’s this information you…” Tony broke off. “JARVIS, where’s my coffee?”

  


“It is two forty three a.m., sir, you have a press conference in ten hours and forty seven minutes, and you have not slept in sixty one hours and thirty three minutes. Perhaps you would prefer a different form of drink?”

  


Tony glanced up at the nearest camera incredulously. “You can’t be serious.”

  


“A hot chocolate, perhaps, sir?” JARVIS suggested. “Studies have shown that…”

  


Tony interrupted him with a groan. “JARVIS, you’re making me tired just listening to you.”

  


“I suspect that your tiredness has more to do with the fact that you have not slept in sixty one hours and thirty four minutes, sir.” JARVIS told him mercilessly.

  


“You’re as bad as Pepper.” Tony told him, narrowing his eyes at the camera. “Fine, I’ll have a hot chocolate.” 

  


“As you wish, sir.” The coffee machine whirred into life. 

  


“You don’t need to be so smug about it.” Tony complained, moving back towards the microwave that was still spinning.

  


“My apologies, sir. In future I shall endeavour to remove any smugness from my tone.”

  


Tony glared at the camera again. “It is far too late for this level of smart-assery, JARVIS.”

  


“I am what you programmed me to be, sir.”

  


“I have no idea what I was thinking.” Tony commented, leaning against the counter and waiting for the microwave to countdown the final ten seconds. “I must have been drunk.”

  


“That does seem likely.”

  


Tony retrieved the casserole from the microwave, and his hot chocolate from the coffee machine, and settled himself on one of the barstools - it wasn’t the most comfortable of places to eat, but at least Obie hadn’t tried to killed him there.

  


Tony spooned a mouthful of casserole into his mouth and moaned happily. “Wow, this is great. Mrs. Huerta has just become my favourite cleaner of all time, but don’t tell Pepper. She’d never let me live it down after all the fuss I made when she hired her. Now, what have you got for me? What has Obie done now?”

  


There was a long silence and Tony looked up from his casserole in concern. “JARVIS?”

  


“My apologies, sir.” JARVIS answered immediately. “On the 6th of June, 1993, Mister Stane transferred one hundred thousand dollars from the Stark Industries discretionary funds to…”

  


“He wasn’t funding a terrorist group, was he?” Tony interrupted, horrified at the very thought. “JARVIS, tell me he had nothing to do with 9/11.”

  


“Not that I am aware of, sir.” JARVIS assured him. “Mister Stane transferred the funds through multiple shell companies and eventually into the account of a Miss Jessica Margaret Lavelle.”

  


Tony swallowed his mouthful of casserole. “A woman? Did he have an affair with her or something?”

  


“No, sir.” JARVIS denied. “A further fifty thousand dollars was transferred to Miss Lavelle on the first day of every year since that date.”

  


“And what do we know about this woman?” Tony asked.

  


“Miss Lavelle was born in Los Angeles on the seventeenth of August 1973,” JARVIS began. “She attended Los Angeles Elementary School…”

  


“Fast forward, JARVIS.” 

  


“Of course, sir. She moved to Sunnydale, California in June of 1993 and married a Mister Anthony Peter Harris on the twenty eighth of September that year. Less than two months later she gave birth to a boy on the eleventh of November 1993, who she named Alexander Lavelle Harris.”

  


Tony almost choked on his casserole. “She was a bit young for Obie, wasn’t she, JARVIS? She would have only been seventeen and he would have been forty three. That’s illegal in California.”

  


“Mister Alexander Harris is not Mister Stane’s child, sir.” JARVIS told him. 

  


“Thank goodness for that.” Tony sighed in relief. “So why was Obie paying her off?”

  


There was a pause. “It seems as though Mister Alexander Harris is your child, sir.”

  


This time Tony really did choke. “What?” He gasped out, between coughs. “This really isn’t the time for your sense of humour, JARVIS.”

  


“It appears that you met Mrs. Harris at a party on the 2nd of February, 1993, sir.” JARVIS sounded apologetic. “When she discovered that she was pregnant she attempted to contact you, but was intercepted by Mister Stane who…”

  


“Paid her off.” Tony concluded. “Are you sure the kid’s mine?”

  


“Mister Stane insisted that a paternity test be run, sir.” JARVIS told him. “I have sent the results of the test to your phone.”

  


Tony grabbed for his phone and brought up the document in question. There was a four columned table which seemed to have the technical details but, aside from noting that one of the columns bore his name and the words ‘alleged father’, Tony skipped down to the bottom.

  


“Probability of paternity - 99.9996 percent.” He read. “And you’ve confirmed that this is my DNA?”

  


“Yes, sir.”

  


“Any chance that it’s a forgery?” 

  


“No, sir.” JARVIS denied. “I have compared the report with the one stored in the DNA Diagnostic Centre’s database and they are identical.”

  


Tony’s mouth twisted in amusement. “Did some hacking, huh, JARVIS?”

  


“Yes, sir.”

  


Tony stared unseeingly at the phone in front of him. “I have a son?”

  


“So it seems, sir?”

  


“And his name is Alexander?” Tony double checked.

  


“Alexander Lavelle Harris, sir.” JARVIS confirmed. “It seems that he was claimed by Mister Harris.”

  


“So he doesn’t know about me?” 

  


“Not that I can tell, sir.”

  


“I have a son.” Tony repeated in amazement. “What do you know about him?”

  


“Alexander Lavelle Harris was born at Sunnydale General Hospital at two thirty seven in the afternoon, on the eleventh of November 1993.” JARVIS began. “He attended Sunnydale Elementary School, Sunnydale Junior High School, and he is now a Junior at Sunnydale Highschool.”

  


“Whoever named those schools ought to be fired.” Tony commented, picking up his spoon again. “How are his grades?”

  


“His GPA is currently 3.4.” JARVIS informed him. “Though those grades have been achieved in his school’s highest tracked classes.”

  


“He goes to a school named ‘Sunnydale High’.” Tony pointed out. “How many tracks can their school really have? What else? Is he healthy?”

  


“Yes, sir, though he appears to visit the emergency room more frequently than could be deemed normal for someone of his age.”

  


Tony glanced quickly towards the nearest camera. “Why?”

  


“Aside from an incident in January of 1997 that was diagnosed at Rheumatic Fever, the main cause appears to be broken bones, sir.”

  


“Rheumatic Fever?” Tony frowned. “Doesn’t that damage your heart?”

  


“Yes, sir. Though Mister Alexander’s heart was believed to be unaffected by the disease.”

  


Tony let out a relieved sigh, before turning his attention to the second part of JARVIS’ answer. “And you said broken bones?”

  


“Mister Alexander broke his left ulna in November of 1999 and his right radius in March of 2001.” JARVIS explained. “In September of 2008, he fractured his fifth and seventh ribs…”

  


“He fractured his ribs?” Tony echoed. “How?”

  


“The medical report does not offer an explanation, sir.”

  


“Any chance it was his father?” Tony asked worriedly.

  


“No, sir.” JARVIS denied, much to Tony’s relief. “While the medical reports for his broken ulna and broken radius did indicate that Mister Harris was suspected to have been involved, no such suspicions are mentioned in his later medical reports.”

  


“So his father used to hit him, but he doesn’t anymore.” Tony concluded, his hand clenching into a fist.

  


“Mister Harris’ involvement was never proven, sir.”

  


“Tell me about this ‘Mister Harris’.” Tony ordered.

  


“Mister Anthony Peter Harris was born in Sunnydale, California in on the 17th of December, 1957.” JARVIS began. 

  


0-0-0

  


It was well past dawn when JARVIS eventually convinced Tony to go to bed. Tony had wanted to put up a protest, as he had each of the other times JARVIS had suggested it, but his head was swimming and JARVIS had assured him that there was no more pertinent information to be learned about his son’s life. The problem was, Tony decided as he stared at the ceiling above his bed, he didn’t just want to know the pertinent facts - he wanted to know everything!

  


He had a son, an actual, living son, and…

  


And that was where he got stuck, because he had absolutely no frame of reference as to what to do with that information (other than have JARVIS stalk the boy). Should he contact the boy’s parents? They sounded like pieces of work. Should he report them to the child services? Should he sue for custody? 

  


Would the boy, Xander, even want to meet him? Should that make a difference? Did he really want to feed Xander to the press? Being a Stark had it’s perks, sure, but it wasn’t all sunshine and roses. If people found out that Tony had a son, Xander would not only have to handle seeing his face on the cover of magazines, but there was also a good chance that there would be kidnapping attempts. Tony had already been kidnapped three times by the time he was Xander’s age and four times since then - the latest of which had definitely been the worst. Did he really want the Ten Rings to find out about Xander?

  


No. Hell no, but that didn’t mean that Tony didn’t want to meet him. So he needed to find a way of meeting the boy without the press finding out and, preferably without the Jessica and Anthony Harris knowing about it and asking for more money. It wasn’t Tony wasn’t willing to provide more money for Xander’s care, after all, one day the boy would inherit Stark Industries, but from JARVIS had found the money Obie had send them every year had been spent on alcohol and smokes - not on Xander. Tony would rather give the money directly to the boy.

  


So Tony needed a plan for meeting the boy without anyone finding out. Good thing he had nothing better to do than stare at the ceiling and think.

  


0-0-0

  


“Sir?”

  


Tony groaned and tried to bury his head into the pillow beneath him.

  


“Sir?” JARVIS repeated mercilessly. “It is twelve thirty in the afternoon, of the 28th of March 2010. You have a press conference in an hour. Mister Hogan will be here to pick you up in thirty minutes.”

  


Tony groaned again as JARVIS opened the curtains, letting the light in. “How long was I asleep?”

  


“Four hours and thirteen minutes, sir.” 

  


“And I have how long?”

  


“Twenty nine minutes, sir.”

  


“Wake me up in ten.”

  


“Sir? It is now forty one minutes past twelve. Mister Hogan will be arriving in nineteen minutes. Sir?”

  


Tony groaned as he rolled out of bed. “You’re a menace, JARVIS.”

  


“Yes, sir. You now have eighteen minutes.”

  


Tony staggered into the bathroom and winced at his reflection. He wasn’t even sure he’d looked this bad when he’d come back from Afghanistan. Not only was his skin was almost translucent, but the bruising around his eyes made it look as though he hadn’t slept in weeks.

  


It was the quickest shower and shave Tony had ever had, but he somehow managed to be dressed by twelve twenty five. He looked in the mirror again and grimaced, sure his hair looked better but he still looked like the walking dead. 

  


“Mister Hogan has arrived, sir.” 

  


Tony retrieved the pottles of concealer and foundation that he kept in his bathroom drawer and slipped them into his pocket. “Is my coffee ready, JARVIS? And if you even consider suggesting hot chocolate I’ll donate you to a community college.”

  


“Yes, sir.” JARVIS answered, as Tony jogged down the stairs and towards the kitchen. “And Mister Hogan has a breakfast burrito waiting for you in the car.”

  


“Happy brought me breakfast?” Tony asked, swiping his coffee from the coffee maker and pouring it quickly into a travel mug. “Don’t you think he should have bought me dinner first?”

  


“He did so on my request, sir.”

  


Tony glanced towards the nearest camera in surprise. “Breakfast this morning, hot chocolate last night, did I accidently put you in charge of my diet, JARVIS?”

  


“You did not, sir. However, as no one else was willing or able to take responsibility for it, I chose to step into the void.”

  


“I am an adult, you know, JARVIS.” Tony pointed out, shutting the front door behind him. 

  


“So your birth certificate claims, sir.”

  


“Bossy and sassy.” Tony grumbled. “Where did I go wrong with you?”

  


“Good afternoon, Mister Stark.” Happy was holding the back left door of the car open.

  


“Is it?” Tony asked doubtfully, snatching his breakfast burrito out of Happy’s hand. “I’m not convinced that it’s the afternoon, and I’m ninety three percent sure that it’s not a good one.”

  


He climbed into the car, placed his coffee in the drink holder, and began to unwrap the burrito as Happy shut the door behind him and made his way to the driver’s seat. “Are there vegetables in this?” 

  


“No, sir.” Happy turned the keys in the ignition and slowly pulled away from the house.

  


“Are you sure?” Tony peered suspiciously at the open end of the burrito and, using his thumb and forefinger pulled a mushroom slice out. “What do you call this then?”

  


“I believe that is classified as a fungi.” Happy told him, looking back through the rear vision mirror.

  


Tony popped the mushroom into his mouth with a glare, before taking a bite out of the burrito and placing it beside him. He retrieved the makeup pottles from his pocket and took the cover off the mirror attached to the seat in front of him.

  


“Are you feeling alright, sir?” Happy asked. “You look as though you haven’t slept since Tuesday.”

  


“I’m fine.” Tony used the sponge to apply the concealer to the darkest bruises around his eyes. “And I have slept, I woke up half an hour ago.”

  


“Hmm,” Happy didn’t sound convinced. “Pepper asked me to tell you that it wouldn’t be a bad thing if you looked a little off your game. She says it will show that you’re worried about Mister Stane.”

  


Tony looked up from his mirror. “Should I be concerned at the way you are all conspiring behind my back? First JARVIS organises my breakfast and now this? Besides, how did Pepper know that I wouldn’t be looking naturally fabulous?”

  


“I couldn’t say, sir.”

  


It was exactly twenty five minutes past one when Happy pulled the car up in front of Stark Industries, and twenty seven minutes past one when Tony entered the antechamber off the Press Room where Pepper was waiting for him.

  


“Sober  _ and  _ on time.” Pepper commented, with a smile. “I’m impressed, Happy.”

  


“Hey!” Tony protested. “He didn’t do anything except drive. Where’s my coffee?”

  


“The press conference starts in three minutes.” Pepper pointed out. “You don’t have time for a coffee.”

  


Tony ignored her and zeroed his gaze in one of the people in the room he didn’t recognise. “You, what’s your name?”

  


The man looked taken aback. “Graeme Riddler. I’m your press secretary.”

  


“I have a press secretary?” Tony asked, mostly just to see the man’s colour rise. “Anyway, I need coffee. Any coffee, though I would prefer that it was actually drinkable.”

  


Riddler’s expression was incredulous, but then he turned to the woman standing near him. “Leah, go get Mister Stark some coffee.”

  


The woman flushed at Riddler’s tone, but nodded and quickly left the room.

  


“Delegation.” Tony observed, turning back to Pepper. “I’m told it’s a good skill to have.”

  


“And one you have in spades, Mister Stark.” Pepper commented dryly. 

  


Tony looked around the room. “Who are all these people?”

  


“They are some of Stark Industries Public Relations team.” Pepper told him. “They’re here whenever you hold a Press Conference.”

  


“They weren’t here last time.” Tony pointed out, though that was probably to ensure that Agent Coulson could give him his cover story in private. “Anyway, I need to talk to Pepper, so everyone out!”

  


Riddler looked startled. “The Press Conference is about to start, Mister Stark.”

  


Tony turned to him and held up a finger. “One, it’s my Press Conference so it’ll start when I say it starts. Two,” He held up a second finger. “I’m not actually needed for the first part anyway so feel free to start without me. Three,” His third finger joined the others. “The Press Conference doesn’t start for a minute and a half, and four,” Tony put up the fourth finger. “The sooner you get out, the sooner I can talk to Miss Potts, the sooner I’ll be ready for the Press Conference. So, get out! Happy, you can stay.”

  


Tony watched the SI Public Relations Team scurry out of the room with satisfaction. “And send in my coffee when it arrives!” He called after them.

  


“The press conference starts in less than a minute.” Pepper commented disapprovingly as the door shut behind the staff.

  


“Only because Riddler wasted my time.” Tony pointed out. “Anyway, I need you to do something for me.”

  


Pepper looked suspicious. “The last three things you’ve asked me to do have involved me blowing up the arc-reactor, stealing computer files from SI, and putting my hand in your chest.”

  


“They were my computer files,” Tony pointed out. “So it wasn’t stealing.”

  


“They were Mister Stane’s computer files.” Pepper retorted. “And he tried to kill me because of it.”

  


“Semantics.” Tony waved a hand dismissively. “Anyway, this time I don’t need you to steal anything. I need you to organise four science weekends for high schoolers. I need one of them to be held in LA. And I need one class to win an all expenses paid ticket to each one, and I need the LA one to be won by the highest tracked Junior class at Sunnydale High.”

  


Pepper blinked. “What?”

  


“And I need you to make it look as though I’ve been planning it for ages.” Tony added. “Or, at the very least, as though I have no ulterior motives.”

  


“Do you have ulterior motives?” Pepper asked curiously.

  


“Of course I do.” Tony answered. “I always have ulterior motives.”

  


“You want me to arrange four Stark Expo’s for high-schoolers for the Summer of 2011?” Pepper asked. “Why?”

  


“Not 2011,” Tony shook his head. “This summer.”

  


“That’s three months away!” Pepper exclaimed.

  


“Or four, or five. Depending which month you put them in.” Tony agreed. “Also, I think we should make them an annual thing.”

  


“It’s impossible.” Pepper shook her head. “There is no way…”

  


“Of course there is!” Tony interrupted her. “Not only are you entirely brilliant, but you’ll have JARVIS’ full co-operation. The two of you could probably take over the world before next month if you really put your minds to it.” He paused and pointed a finger at her. “Which you shouldn’t or, at least, not without inviting me to help.”

  


Pepper’s mouth opened and then closed again when there was a knock on the door.

  


“Is that my coffee?” Tony called.

  


“Yes, sir.” A woman called tentatively. “Also, Mister Riddler has asked me to let you know that it is time for the Press Conference to start.”

   


Tony strode towards the door and threw it open, before accepting the coffee from the woman. “Thank you, Leah.” He stepped back and waved the Public Relations Team back in. “Alright then, let’s get this show on the road.”.   
  
  



	2. IntroductION

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.N. Thank you so much for all your reviews. I will be replying to them all, but I like to only read a few a day (to spread them out) so it might take me a little while longer to get to them all.

Xander slumped down in his seat and tried not to care that Willow and Buffy were pointedly ignoring him – he could practically see the anger rising from Buffy’s shoulders like steam and it made him feel sick. He hated being at odds with his friends, though at least this time Cordelia had come down on his side. Unfortunately, Cordelia being the only one to agree with him only gave him doubts about whether he was right. Sure he liked Cordelia, and could maybe, maybe, be on the way to loving her, but she was hardly a humanitarian. If she agreed with him did that mean that he was sounding just as self-involved and uncaring as she often did?

Except, he was sure he was right. Angel had killed Miss Calendar, he had killed Theresa, and those were just the people that they knew about. How had Xander become the bad guy for wanting him dead?

He got where Buffy was coming from, he really did. He could still remember the horror he had felt when he had realised that Jesse was a vampire; the devastation he had felt when Jesse had tried to kill him; the hopeless that had come when Giles had told him that Jesse was dead and he was only seeing ‘the thing that had killed him’; and the overwhelming grief he had experienced when his best friend’s body had exploded to dust in front of him. If he had been offered a cure, a way for Jesse to get his soul back, he would have been tempted. But t that had never been one of the options. Because Giles and Buffy had been firmly on the ‘vampires are evil and therefore they should die’ train.

“Mister Harris?”

Xander’s entire body flinched in shock. “Huh?”

Mr. Roberts sighed exasperatedly as the other students sniggered. “Please answer the first question on the board, Mister Harris.”

Xander glanced at the whiteboard behind his teacher. Ah, so they were reviewing electricity today.

He glanced towards Willow and Buffy, more out of habit than anything else, a smart answer on the tip of his tongue, but they were both watching him as though they were waiting for him to screw up so they could join the class in laughing at him for it.

“Three volts.” Xander answered, in a fit of pique.

Willow and Buffy looked startled and, as Xander turned his attention back to the teacher, he saw that Mr. Roberts shared the same expression.

“That is correct.” Mr. Roberts admitted suspiciously. “And the answer to the second question?”

Xander studied the board for a few seconds. “0.15 ohms.”

Mr. Roberts’ mouth dropped open. “Correct again.”

Xander winced as the entire class erupted into whispers. This was exactly why he shouldn’t do classwork when he was angry, it made him want to prove something to the world.

“The third question please, Miss Chase.” Mr. Roberts shifted his attention to Cordelia.

Xander stared blankly at the desk in front of him and tried to ignore the confused stares coming from his classmates. He had bigger things to worry about than their opinion of him, or even his physics final. 

The way he saw it, Buffy and Giles were on dangerous ground. If they decided to curse Angel with a soul rather than staking him, then didn’t that set a precedent for other vampires? Why should Angel get a free pass just because he had been Buffy’s boyfriend? Surely every vampire had someone who had loved them before they began evil - shouldn’t those people get a chance to be reunited with their loved ones too? If they didn’t kill Angel then how could they kill any of the others? 

Besides which, they now had absolute proof that the curse didn’t last forever. Giving Angel his soul back wasn’t a long term solution. Sure Buffy might get another few months, or even a few years, with him, but what happened when the curse broke again and Angel returned to his serial killing ways?

So, yeah, Xander was going to stand by his argument, regardless of whether Willow and Buffy decided to hate him for it. Angel should be dead, just like all the other evil vampires that Buffy staked every week were, just like Jesse was. It was the only way the world could be safe.

Mr. Roberts’ tone suddenly changed and Xander glanced towards him curiously. “...Stark Industries will be hosting four Science Symposiums for high school students around the country this summer. One of which will be held in Los Angeles from the 23rd to the 25th of July.”

Xander glanced back to his desk disinterestedly. He already knew about the conference, Willow had been ecstatic about the idea and had spent an entire day babbling about it, and he’d been interested in the idea of going, if only because it would be a distraction in a terribly boring summer, but there was absolutely no way that he would be able to afford it. He doubted his parents would even be willing to pay for him to travel to LA for the day, let alone pay for accommodation and the entry fee.

Suddenly the students around him erupted in exclamations and Xander looked around in confusion. “What did I miss?”

“We’re all getting a free trip to the conference.” Wendell exclaimed, twisting around in his seat so that he was facing Xander. “Stark Industries is paying for us all to go! Transport, accommodation, everything!” 

Cordelia snorted disparagingly. “Like anyone would want to go anyway. Three days hanging out with losers who only want to talk about science? No thank you.”

“It’ll be amazing!” Willow was exclaiming loudly to Buffy. “I mean, I was going to go anyway, but this way you can come too! And we can sit in on the lectures, and go to the workshops, and maybe even meet Tony Stark!”

“I’m sure Stark has better things to do than hang out with a bunch of dweebs.” Cordelia commented loudly. 

Buffy shot her a dirty look. “Just because you prefer talking about manicures rather than anything of value doesn’t mean that everyone else does.”

“Yeah, ‘cause you’re so much better.” Cordelia sniffed, before affecting a tortured expression and a high pitched voice. “Oh, Angel, how…”

Xander launched himself out of his chair and slapped his hand over Cordelia’s mouth. “Woah.”

Cordelia’s screech of protest was muffled by Xander’s hand, but then she shook him off and turned her icy glare on him. “What do you think you’re doing?”

Xander stepped back and raised his hands defensively. “Sorry, I was just…”

“You always choose her over me!” Cordelia interrupted him as the bell rang.

“I wasn’t choosing her over you.” Xander protested, he’d just been trying to prevent World War 3. Because, really, picking a fight with Buffy right now, and a fight about Angel at that, would probably end in an apocalypse. 

“And why shouldn’t he pick my side?” Buffy asked, pushing Xander aside so she could get closer to Cordelia. “At least I’m not a bimbo with no...”

Xander surged forward and wrapped his hand around Buffy’s mouth. “And again I say, woah! Let’s just all take a deep breath.”

“Mmmpf!” Buffy protested, before elbowing Xander in the stomach. “Get off me, Xander!”

Xander flew backwards into someone’s arms and gasped for breath. Damn it, he really didn’t envy the vampires that were on the receiving end of Buffy’s strength on a regular basis.

“Xander, what are you doing?” Wendell asked, as he helped Xander regain his balance. “Girl fight!” 

All in all, it was possibly the worst class Xander had had all year. Not only had he lost his temper and actually answered the questions correctly, which was never a good thing, but now Buffy, Willow, and Cordelia were mad at him. At least that had been their last physics class of the school year.

It was also their last class of the day, which meant that Xander had to choose what to do afterwards. Should he follow Buffy and Willow to the library and beg for their forgiveness or follow Cordelia out to her car and grovel to her? Should he choose his best friends or his girlfriend?

“I wasn’t choosing Buffy over you.” 

Cordelia snorted, as she unlocked her car. “Sure you weren’t.”

“I wasn’t!” Xander protested, stepping forward and holding Cordelia’s door shut. “I just didn’t want her to go postal on you.”

“So you were protecting me?” Cordelia asked scathingly, tugging angrily at her door. “Really? Do I look like a need protecting? Let go, you big dork!”

Xander released the door with a sigh, before wincing when Cordelia almost fell over when the door finally opened. “I’m sorry.”

“I stood up for you!” Cordelia snapped, turning to face him. “I chose your side with them, and you still picked them over me!”

“You picked my side because you agreed with me.” Xander retorted. “And if stopping you from saying something mean to Buffy was picking her side, then doesn’t that fact that I stopped her from saying anything nasty to you mean anything? I was just trying to keep the peace.”

Cordelia almost seemed to deflate. “You’re an idiot.”

“I know.” Xander assured her quickly.

“And Buffy’s a self-absorbed bitch!”

Xander frowned. “I wouldn’t…”

Cordelia silenced him with a glare. “But so am I.”

Xander definitely wasn’t going to say anything to that.

“The only difference between the two of us is that I’m willing to admit it.” Cordelia continued. “And that she’s better at rescuing puppies when she’s pretending to be Saint Buffy.”

Yeap, there was absolutely nothing Xander could say here without pissing someone off.

“I don’t know why you put up with all her crap.” Cordelia told him.

“She’s my friend.” Xander explained weakly.

Cordelia sniffed. “Not a very good one.” She slid into the driver’s seat and shut the door behind her.

Xander stood back with a sigh. That could have gone better, but it could have also gone a whole lot worse.

“You coming?” Cordelia asked impatiently, through her newly opened window.

“Huh?”

“Are. You. Coming?” Cordelia repeated slowly, rolling her eyes. “I want icecream.”

“Uh, yeah,” Xander almost fell over in his rush to get the passenger door. “I’m in.”

1-1-1

Thankfully, both Buffy and Willow seemed to have forgiven him by the next day, even if the occasionally looks they sent in his direction suggested that they weren’t willing to forget it yet. They definitely hadn’t forgiven Cordelia though, but that was hardly surprising. He was pretty sure they still hadn’t forgiven her for having agreed to date him.

But, despite the dark glares they sent in her direction, Cordelia had apparently decided they weren’t worth her time and so refused to rise to their bait all evening. Which was good because, with Buffy going off to fight Angel, they needed as many hands on deck as possible for Willow’s spell. Xander couldn’t help but appreciate Cordelia’s character growth. Here she was, swallowing down Willow’s glares and occasional insults, to help with a plan that she didn’t agree with. There was no way Cordelia would have agreed to stick around for that in the past.

Then everything went to hell, though thankfully not literally, and Kendra was dead, Willow was in a coma, Giles was missing, Buffy was a fugitive and Xander had a broken arm. The only good thing was that Cordy’s self-preservation instincts had prevailed and she had run when Xander had told her to. He would have hated it if she had been hurt as well. 

Xander and Cordelia spend the night sitting by Willow’s hospital bed and, in Xander’s case at least, trying not to feel too guilty about the fact that Oz had been kept completely out of the loop of the entire thing. It hadn’t been their fault, it had been Willow’s choice not to invite him, but it still made for an awkward night.

And then Xander had lied to Buffy and rescued Giles, and the world hadn’t ended, but Buffy and Angel were missing. Willow was released from hospital a few days later and they sat the rest of their finals, and Buffy was still missing. Then school was let out for the summer and Cordelia left for Las Palmas for the summer.

It felt weird to feel Cordelia’s absence so strongly. Usually the lack of Cordelia was one of the highlights of Xander’s summer holidays, but now Xander missed her even more than Buffy (who still hadn’t come back from wherever she was hiding) and Oz’s constant presence wasn’t making it any easier. Sure it was nice to have another guy around for once, and it was great to get to know Oz better, but being the third wheel wasn’t exactly Xander’s idea of a good time. 

1-1-1

Convincing his mum to let him attend the Stark Science Symposium was a lot harder than Xander had expected it to be. His dad didn’t care, no surprise there, but his mum had taken one look at the flier and permission slip that Mr. Roberts had given them and turned him down flat. It didn’t make sense, normally his mum was just as keen to get rid of Xander as his dad was - especially if it wasn’t going to cost them anything. 

But there was no way that he was going to let his mum’s issues get in the way of him getting out of Sunnydale for a few days. Besides, he hadn’t spent any quality, one on one, time with Willow since the previous Summer and he was looking forward to having the opportunity to do so without Buffy or Oz around.

(Admittedly, knowing that he would probably see Iron Man there, even if just from a distance, was pretty good motivation to go too.)

In the end, two days before the Friday that his permission slip had to be in, Xander gave up on the upfront approach and instead had his dad sign the form after the first dozen beer bottles were scattered around his lazy-boy. Xander knew from experience that his father would be sober enough to sign the form without it looking like Xander had just scribbled on it, but drunk enough not to bother trying to take a swing at him. 

Once that was done, and the form had been handed into the school office, Xander just had to tell his mum that he was going to spend the weekend with Willow (which was true) and he was home free. 

He felt bad about misleading his mum, well, no, he didn’t. But he thought he would have felt bad if he’d had a mum who had ever shown any sign of caring about him, or even a mum who wasn’t drunk more often than she was sober. He’d never understood why his friends who had decent parents would lie to their parents. Not Willow, her parents were gone about the same amount of time that his parents were drunk, but people like Jesse and Buffy. 

Jesse’s parents had been amazing and Xander had spent most of his childhood looking for excuses to hang out at his friend’s house. Mrs. McNally had baked them brownies, and kissed them goodnight, and Mr. McNally had played games with them and had never yelled or called them names - some days Xander missed them almost as much as he missed Jesse.

Mrs. Summer’s seemed just as amazing, she wasn’t perfect - Xander knew that - but she was a hell of a lot better that his own parents. Whenever Xander, Buffy, and Willow watched movies at her house, she made them popcorn and hot chocolate, and she always asked them how their day had been and actually seemed genuinely interested in their answers. 

According to Giles, Buffy had told her mum about being the vampire slayer just before she had disappeared. Giles hadn’t actually come out and said it, but Xander had got the feeling that he thought that maybe Mrs. Summer’s reaction had been one of the reasons that Buffy had run away (if she had run away and hadn’t just died). 

Xander had never understood why Buffy hadn’t wanted to tell her mum that she was the Slayer, and he doubted that Mrs. Summers had done anything more than yell and try and ground Buffy, even after finding out that Buffy had been lying to her for years - chances were she hadn’t even called Buffy any names when she was yelling. Sometimes he wondered whether Buffy realised how lucky she was. 

1-1-1

The bus drive to LA was exciting, mostly because Xander could count the number of times he had left Sunnydale on one hand. There were plants, rocks, hills, and buildings that he had never seen in his life - unlike the Sunnydale ones that he had seen enough times for them to be imprinted in his memory. He tried to keep the reason for his excitement to himself though and instead followed Willow’s lead in exclaiming how exciting the Science Symposium was going to be. 

The hotel was incredible. Not only did they only have to share a room and bathroom with one other person, but there was a chocolate on Xander’s pillow, and a pool and free wi-fi (which would have meant more to Xander if he’d had a laptop or a smartphone).

Xander ended up rooming with Wendell, which wasn’t too bad, but it did make him miss Jesse. Though, even if Jesse had been alive, there was no way he would have come on the trip - Jesse had been a great guy, but he had never made it into any of the first track classes with Willow and Xander.

“Xander?” Willow’s voice was accompanied with a knock on his hotel room door.

Xander looked across at Wendell and raised an eyebrow. “You mind?”

Wendell didn’t even look up from his phone. “Nah.”

“Thanks,” Xander strode across the room and pulled the door open. “Hey.”

Willow stood on her tiptoes and peered over his shoulder into the room. “Ooo, very nice. Did you like the chocolate? Do you want to go explore?”

“Do I ever!” Xander grinned and, after checking that he had his keycard in his pocket, shut the door. “And when have you ever known me not to like chocolate? How’s your room?”

“About the same,” Willow commented, practically bouncing as they walked. “Though we have a better view than you, I think.”

“Who’d you get stuck with, anyway?”

“Amy.” Willow answered. “It’s pretty cool actually. I think I’m going to ask her to show me some basic magic stuff. You know, since my spell to curse Angel worked.”

“You don’t know that.” Xander pointed out.

Willow shot him an annoyed look. “Yes, I do. Something happened, Xander! One minute I was just reading the words, and the next minute it was like the words were reading me or something.”

Xander frowned. “Yeah, Cordelia told me about it. She said it was really freaky.”

“Phfft.” Willow scowled. “She was probably just worried that the magic would mess up her hair or something. You know how Cordelia is.”

“Hey,” Xander protested weakly. “She’s my girlfriend. I thought you were starting to like her more?”

“Me, like Cordelia?” Willow asked in disbelief. “But she’s Cordelia!”

“Excellently argued.” Xander commented sarcastically.

Willow looked a little guilty. “Sorry, I know she’s your girlfriend and all that. I’ll try not to complain about her too much.”

Xander couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed. That was the best Willow could do? Surely it wasn’t too much to ask for his best friend to at least try and give his girlfriend a second chance. Sure Cordelia had been a bitch for basically their entire lives, but she wasn’t that person anymore. Besides, Buffy hadn’t exactly come out and said it, but from some of the comments she had made, and some of the pictures she had in her room, Xander was pretty sure Buffy had been her high school’s ‘Cordelia’ before she had become the slayer and that didn’t seem to bother Willow at all. 

(Though, now that Xander thought about it, Willow probably hadn’t picked up on the clues like Xander had. Willow might have been the smartest person Xander had ever met, but Xander read people much better than she did).

...“Xander?” Willow’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. 

“Sorry,” Xander answered, more out of reflex than anything. “What were you saying?”

Willow huffed. “I think I’m going to ask Amy to teach me to levitate a pencil. All the books I’ve been reading say that’s the first step.”

Xander looked down at her in concern. “You’ve been reading more books on magic? Didn’t Giles say something about opening a door that you won’t be able to close?”

“Giles says it’s fine.” Willow said defensively. “He’s been lending me some of his books. He says it will be useful to have someone who can perform magic on our side.”

“Yeah, but what about you?” Xander persisted. “What if you end up like Amy’s mum or something? How do we know that magic doesn’t turn people evil? You can’t forget that Giles did some pretty ghastly stuff when he was doing magic. People died!”

“Don’t be silly, Xander. I’m not going to turn evil!” Willow protested, with a laugh. “Miss Calendar wasn’t evil, and neither is Amy. I just want to be useful. Wouldn’t you want to be useful if you found a way?”

Xander honestly had no idea how to respond to that. “Ouch!”

“Not that you’re not already useful.” Willow added quickly. “It’s just that it’s not like we can help Buffy fight or anything, and it’s not like you’re very good at research. You get distracted and look at all the pictures.”

“Oh look, the pool!” Xander diverted her attention quickly, this was not a conversation he had any interest in continuing. “It looks great. Doesn’t it look great?”

“It really does.” Willow agreed reverently. “Maybe we should go get our swimsuits.”

Xander looked down at his watch. “We only have another ten minutes until we’re supposed to meet Mr. Roberts and Miss Maloney in the foyer.” 

Willow bounced in place, before beginning to walk back the way they had come. “Oh, I can’t wait for the Symposium to start! Did you know that at all the other conferences Tony Stark has met with five of the students attending? He meets with them for, like, fifteen minutes and gives them a Stark-laptop and a Stark-phone and they can ask him questions. I really want to get picked! Do you think I’ll get picked, Xander?”

Xander did know all that, if only because Willow had told him about it four different times on the bus ride. “I don’t know, Wills, maybe.”

“It would just be so amazing to meet him.” Willow continued. “Can you imagine? I could ask him about all my questions about programming computers. Did you know that he built an AI? And he has robots - actual robots!”

1-1-1

It really was nice to hang out with Willow for the day. They wandered around the LA Convention Centre together, looking at the different exhibits that showed a bunch of different inventions and discoveries that had taken place in the last century, eating ice cream, and signing up for the different lectures and workshops that Willow wanted to go to.

Xander loved watching Willow learn. She got excited about it all, so determined to get it right. It was like watching one of those mini documentaries about NFL football players that showed them being amazing and determined when they were in high school. You could just tell that they were going to go on and do great things. 

Most of the time, Xander even enjoyed it enough to forget that Willow thought that he had all but ridden the short bus. It was his own fault, he knew that. When they’d all been kids, he’d realised that Willow liked being ‘the smart one’ and Jesse didn’t like being ‘the stupid one’. Xander, who was just desperate to have his friends like him (so that he’d have people in his life who didn’t throw empty beer bottles at him and call him a worthless bastard) had been perfectly happy to be ‘the stupid one’ - it wasn’t as though his parents cared about what kind of grades he got anyway.

But then Elementary School had turned into Junior High, and Junior High had turned into High School, and Xander had learnt how to do well enough that he always made into the First Track, but not to do it in a way that anyone thought it was anything more than a fluke (or a result of him getting Willow to do all his assignments for him). 

It didn’t really matter anyway, it wasn’t as though Xander was ever going to go to college - there was no way his parents could afford it. Not even a partial scholarship would help, and he would never get a full ride - they were reserved for people who were as smart as Willow. 

No, Xander would get a job as a fast food clerk or something and do his best not to end up an alcoholic, unemployed loser like his dad.

After lunch, Xander and Willow joined the thousands of other students in gathering for the opening ceremony. It was flashy and loud, and nothing like Xander had imagined the opening ceremony of a Science Symposium would be like (though admittedly, it made more sense when Xander remembered that Tony Stark had probably had something to do with the planning), and then Tony Stark himself arrived and gave a small speech.

He was excited that they had come, blah, blah, blah, science was amazing, blah, blah, blah, he was sure they all had a great potential to change the world, blah, blah, blah. 

Well, to be fair, it was actually quite interesting, if only because Stark was probably the most charismatic person Xander had ever seen. Xander had no idea how the man did it. How did he make them all listen like that? Most of the time that Xander talked he felt as though people were just waiting for his noise to stop so they could talk (and sometimes they didn’t even wait until he was finished). It seemed like an amazing skill for a person to have and almost more impressive and useful that the man’s reported genius.

“Now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for.” Stark said eventually. “As I’m sure you’re aware, by attending the Stark Science Symposium, you were automatically placed into the draw to win a Stark Laptop, a Stark Phone, and, most importantly, an interview with me.”

The entire room screamed and cheered, even Willow - though she sounded more like she was screaming for help than screaming with excitement. The sound was enough to make Xander wince.

Stark reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope and opened it. “Are you ready to find out who the five winners are?”

“Yes!”

The noise was deafening and Xander wondered whether this was what live concerts were like. How strange that thousands of dweebs (as Cordelia affectionately called them) were so similar to musos. 

Stark opened the envelope with a flourish. “Now, before I read these names, I need to tell you that this prize is not transferable. So, I read out your name, you can’t give the prize to your friend. No matter how much they beg you to.” He flashed a charming grin as everyone chuckled and pulled a piece of paper. “The first person who will be meeting with me tomorrow is...Angela Marcos from Crescenta Valley High School.”

There was an excited scream about a hundred metres to Xander and Willow’s left and more than a few disappointed mutters.

“It’s alright.” Willow was muttering beside him. “There’s still four more chances.”

“The second name is...Alexander Harris from Sunnydale High School.” Stark announced.

Xander started in shock. “What?”

“Oh my gosh!” Willow exclaimed, tugging on Xander’s arm and bouncing in place. “Oh my gosh, Xander!”

That was about when Xander stopped listening to anything that was happening around him because, really? What were the chances that it would be him? He was going to meet Iron Man. He was going to get to talk to Tony Stark! It didn’t seem real. These sorts of things never happened to him - he was the guy that got picked last for PE class (even after Jonathon sometimes) and now he was going to get to meet a celebrity. Not to mention that he was going to get a laptop and Starkphone - he’d never had a computer of his own before.

The sound of Willow moaning in disappointment drew Xander out of his thoughts in time to hear Tony Stark finish announcing the winners and be replaced with another man who reminded them of all the important things and then dismissed them.

“I don’t think it’s fair that they made it non-transferable.” Willow commented, as she and Xander made their way to the front right corner of the room where Xander would pick up the special pass that would let him meet with Tony Stark. “I mean, who are they say what you can and can’t do with your prize? Besides, how did they pick the winners? It sounds like they just pulled the names out of a hat or something. Wouldn’t it have made more sense to judge people on their grades or something? At least that way the people who won would actually get something out of meeting with Tony Stark.”

Xander bit his tongue to keep himself from replying. He was sure Willow didn’t mean it like it sounded. It made sense that she was a little jealous as well as being happy for him. Besides, it wasn’t as though she didn’t have a point - she probably had a list of questions that she had been hoping to ask Stark, while Xander was more interested in him being Iron Man than anything else.

It made him glad that they had made the prize non-transferable. If it hadn’t been, he would have probably ended up letting Willow talk him into allowing her to meet with Stark instead, either that or he would have stood his ground and Willow would have ended up mad at him. At least this way it was completely out of his hands.

Once Xander had claimed his pass, he was given instructions to be at the far right side of the South Exhibit space (or near where Howard Stark’s flying car prototype was on display) in exactly two hours. Apparently Stark was planning to meet with them all that afternoon, Xander figured it was probably because the man had better things to do than hang around at at Science Symposium for High School students for a weekend.

The two hours seemed to go painfully slowly. It was both terrifying and exciting to know that he would be meeting with Tony Stark in just a few hours and Xander couldn’t help but wish he’d had some warning. Maybe then, he would have chosen to wear his blue shirt instead of the baggy brown one that, now that he thought about it, made him look like some kind of impoverished farmhand (not that the impoverished part was too far from the truth).

Mostly, Xander spent the two hours wishing that Cordelia wasn’t in Spain and, therefore, out of contact of his very limited cellphone plan. Cordelia would have told him to buck up and stop being such a scared idiot, that Tony Stark was no more fabulous than she was and seeing as he dealt with her everyday he would be fine. Not to mention that, if Xander had been able to tell her about the snarky little comments that Willow kept making about him being ‘unworthy’, Cordelia’s reply would have been so vicious and nasty that he would have been too distracted trying to stick up for his friend to bother being hurt by Willow’s comments.

Eventually the two hours was up though and Xander, having convinced Willow that there was no point in her missing the beginning of the lecture on computer programming that she was looking forward to, made his way to the South Exhibit Space (which seemed bigger than the block that Xander lived on), and then to the far right side where a red-headed woman met him.

“Mister Harris?” The woman asked, holding a hand and looking him over.

“Uh, yeah.” Xander wiped his hand on his cargo pants nervously, before shaking her hand.

“I’m Pepper.” The woman introduced herself with a smile, before gesturing to the door to her right. “Mister Stark is waiting for you through there.”

Xander glanced towards the door nervously. “Any advice?”

Pepper looked amused. “Just be yourself.”

Xander doubted that was a good idea. He pushed the door open and took in the room (which was more lounge like than he had been expecting) before noticing Tony Stark (Tony Stark!) standing behind one of the arm chairs.

“Xander, right?” Stark asked, his expression unreadable.

“Yeah,” Xander nodded jerkily, flinching in surprise when the door shut behind him. “I mean, yes, sir.”

“Great,” Stark’s hands were gripping the back of the chair. “I’m Tony.”

Xander nodded silently, before cursing himself. Damn it, Willow was right. She would have done a much better job of this than he was.

There was a long pause, before Stark spoke again. “Xander, I am your father.”

Xander stared at him because, really, what was he supposed to say to that? Clearly it was a Star Wars’ reference, but how did Stark expect him to respond? Was it some kind of code that Xander didn’t know? Was it some kind of test? Like only people who knew that reference actually got to talk to Stark?

“Uh, Stark Wars?” Xander asked, before flushing in embarrassment. “I mean, Star Wars.”

“Damn it.” Stark ran a hand through his hair. “Pepper was right. I shouldn’t have used the reference.” He moved out from behind the chair and sat down. “Why don’t you take a seat?”

Xander moved forward cautiously and perched himself on the edge of the seat. He wasn’t really sure what was going on. Had he failed the test? It sounded like he had, but Stark hadn’t kicked him out yet so that was good, right?

“How do I…” Stark seemed to be muttering to himself, but then he suddenly turned all his attention on Xander. “Alright, you’re Alexander Lavelle Harris, son of Jessica Margaret Harris, nee Lavelle, and adopted son of Anthony Peter Harris.”

Xander had no idea what was happening. Were all famous people this crazy? “Mostly right.” He commented. “Except Anthony is my actual dad - I’m not adopted.”

“Well, this just got a whole lot more awkward.” Stark muttered. “Actually you are. I wasn’t kidding with that Star Wars’ reference. Seventeen and a half years ago, give or take a few weeks, I was at a party in LA and, well, let’s just say that your mum and I spent the night together.”

Xander knew that his mouth was hanging open. “What?”

“I had no idea about any of this until a few months ago.” Stark added quickly. “Well, I knew that I’d slept with her, except I didn’t even know that because I sleep with a lot of women, but what I mean is that, when your mum tried to tell me she was pregnant, someone intercepted her email and then paid her off and so I never found out about you.”

“Wait,” Xander stood up, and then sat down again. “Are you serious? You actually think that you’re my father?”

“I don’t think, I know.” Stark told him seriously. “Here, look.”

Xander barely managed to catch the thrown cellphone in time to prevent it from hitting him in the chest. “What am I looking at?” He asked, as he took in the screen.

“That’s a copy of that paternity test that your mum had done.” Stark told him. “If you scroll down a bit, you’ll see that there’s a 99.9996 percent probability that I’m your father.”

Xander scrolled down and stared at the numbers on the screen. “How do I know that this isn’t just all one big practical joke?”

“Well, you don’t, I guess.” Stark admitted. “Though don’t you think I have better things to do than go around tricking teenagers into thinking that I’m their father?”

Which was a good point. 

“Besides, we can have another paternity test done, if you like.” Stark offered. “I’ll pay for it of course.”

Xander shook his head. “I don’t know...I...it just…” He had no idea what to say.

“You look like you need a drink.” Stark leapt to his feet and opened the door that Xander had come through. “We need drinks, Pepper. One non-alcoholic, though actually, you should probably make them both non-alcoholic. Xander, do you have a preference?”

“Coke?” Xander answered automatically, his brain still trying to process the new information.

“Coke it is.” Tony commented brightly. “Two cokes please, Miss Potts.”

 

Xander waited until Stark was seated again before talking. “Are...are you sure about this?”

“Of course I’m sure, I’m Tony Stark, I’m always sure!” Stark exclaimed, before grimacing. “Damn, that was the kind of thing my father would have said. I’m terrible at this, I should have had Pepper do it. I’m going to be just as bad at this as my dad was and your dad is. Which isn’t to say anything against your dad, maybe you like him. Do you like him? He seems like kinda an asshole. Damn, I really am bad at this!”

Weirdly enough, listening to Stark babble like a crazy person was incredibly comforting. Clearly he wasn’t the only one finding this weird, and awkward, and scary.

“So why are you telling me?” Xander asked, before inwardly cursing himself. Of all the things he could have said, that was what he was going with?

Stark almost looked relieved to have a question to answer. “Well, as I said, I didn’t actually find out about you until a few months ago, March actually.”

Xander thought back. “Wasn’t that when you became Iron Man?”

“Yeah,” Stark nodded. “It was actually only three days after that. Anyway, when I found out I wanted to meet you. So I arranged these Science Symposiums to give a us chance to chat and…”

“You arranged this Symposium just to meet me?” Xander interrupted incredulously.

“Actually, I arranged all four of them so that I could meet you.” Stark interrupted. “If I’d just held one people might have been suspicious.”

Xander fell back against the seat. That was unbelievable. His dad, or adopted dad, had only grudgingly allowed him to have birthday parties when he was a kid, but Stark had apparently arranged four huge conferences, that would have cost him millions of dollars, just to meet him?

“You couldn’t pick up a phone?” Xander asked, before he could stop himself.

Tony chuckled. “That was suggested to me, but this way I actually got to meet you.”

“And now what?” Xander asked unsurely, his mind racing through all the options he could think of. “Are you going to, like, sue for custody of me?”

Stark’s expression was serious. “Not unless you want me to. In fact, if it’s alright with you. I thought maybe we wouldn’t tell anyone, for awhile at least. There are some...pretty bad people who would love to use you against me and, well, I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Xander wondered what Stark would think about the fact that Xander almost died on a weekly basis. 

“Other than that, I don’t know.” Stark shrugged. “What would you like to happen?”

“Uh,” Xander tried to stall for time. “Uh.”

“You don’t have to decide now.” Stark told him quickly. “If you like, we can just talk some more and then you can go away and think about it.”

Xander looked down at his watch. “I’m pretty sure my fifteen minutes is almost up.”

Stark barked out a laugh. “Xander, you’re my son.” He pulled a face. “Hell, that sounds weird. Anyway there’s no time limit on how long you can spend with me, not unless you want there to be. Besides, Pepper should be back with our drinks any minute now.”

1-1-1

In the end, Pepper and Happy were the only people Tony had told about Xander’s existence. Tony thought he would have probably told Rhodey too, except he had barely seen his friend since March. Never before had Tony really considered how few people he had in his life. He’d always known he didn’t have as many friends as most people, but now that Obie was dead (and his duplicity had been revealed) and Rhodey was too busy with work to visit, Tony was left with his only companions being two employees, JARVIS, and his robots. 

Except, maybe, now he would have Xander too. It was a scary thought. It had been almost twenty years since he’d had kind of family, well, aside from Aunt Peggy (who had her own family) and Obie (who had tried to kill him), and now he had a son.

The problem was that Tony hadn’t had any reason to interact with anyone under the age of twenty one in over a decade (well, aside from the college girls that he’d spent the night with in his mid-twenties) and he had absolutely no idea how to talk to them. What if he said all the wrong things and alienated Xander?

So he’d practised (not that he’d admitted that to anyone, not even JARVIS) with five teenagers at each of his Science Symposiums and he’d discovered that teenagers weren’t really any different to most adults. They could be a bit awkward, sure, but most of them were refreshingly honest.

Unfortunately, despite the practise, Tony still managed to screw up within a minute of meeting Xander. He’d thought that using a Star Wars’ reference might have been a good icebreaker, but the look of startled confusion on the boy’s face had quickly disabused him of that notion. 

Thankfully, after a bit more awkwardness where Tony had come across like a crazy stalker and then babbled as though he was drunk, thing had gotten better and they’d talked.

It had been weird, but amazing. Tony had loved learning more about his son, some of the information he had already known, but since Xander didn’t have any kind of social media (apparently because he didn’t have access to a computer except for at school), a lot of it was new.

Apparently Xander was a fan of Star Wars (so the reference hadn’t been as much of a fail as it could have been), he had a girlfriend (who Tony had had JARVIS research as soon as Xander had left), his best friend was a girl named Willow (and there was a girl named Buffy too), and Xander didn’t plan on attending college (it had taken every bit of self-control that Tony hadn’t known he had not to make a fuss about that piece of information, but he had soothed himself by remembering that there was plenty of time for that in the future).

When Xander had left two hours after their meeting had started, a Starkphone prototype thats usage would be charged to Tony in his pocket, and a laptop that Tony had personally set up for him in a bag over his shoulder, Tony had felt strangely bereft. Xander was funny, and smart, and Tony couldn’t remember having ever enjoying a conversation with anyone so much in his life.

Still, at least Xander had promised to meet with him again over the weekend and, while he hadn’t said it, Tony was pretty sure that his son was just as interested in staying in touch as he was. There would be plenty of time for more conversations in the future.


	3. AcclimatizatION

“Xander!” Willow exclaimed, waving excitedly as he jogged towards her. “There you are! Where have you been? How was your meeting with Tony Stark? Did you ask him about his arc reactor technology?”

 

Xander opened his mouth, before shutting it again. He had no idea how to answer that. He’d spent the last half hour wandering around the Convention Centre looking at the different exhibits and trying to get his head around the fact that Tony Stark was his father.

 

He’d agreed with Tony (as the man had insisted he call him) about not telling other people. (He wanted to at least have some idea about what he thought about it before the world gave their opinion). But he’d made sure to get Tony’s permission to tell Willow, and Cordy (and Buffy if she ever returned). It hadn’t occurred to him that he wouldn’t want to tell Willow. He told Willow everything!

 

Except, now that Willow was standing in front of him, the last thing he wanted to do was to share his news with her.

 

“Xander?”

 

“Sorry,” Xander shrugged casually. “It was great. He’s pretty funny and he likes Star Wars.”

 

Willow looked disappointed. “That’s it?! You got to talk to Tony Stark and all you learnt is that he likes Star Wars? I knew I should have gone instead of you!”

 

Xander wished he’d had the forethought to ask Tony even just one question about the arc reactor so that he could have reported something back to Willow. “I got a new phone.” He offered, fishing it out of his the pocket of his cargo pants and showing it to her.

 

Willow sighed loudly, barely even glancing at the phone. “You and Tony Stark must have talked about something other than Star Wars.”

 

“He asked some questions about me,” Xander told her. “I told him about you, and Cordy, and…”

 

“You wasted Tony Stark’s time talking about your girlfriend?” Willow asked loudly.

 

“He told me about one of his girlfriends too.” Xander defended, not that his mum could really be considered one of Tony’s girlfriends. “How did your lecture go? It was on something to do with computers, right?”

 

Willow rolled her eyes. “It was on computer programming and it was amazing! They actually had someone who works at Stark Industries take it and, after he was finished, he answered our questions for almost an entire hour!”

 

“Cool.” Xander grinned enthusiastically. “So, do you think you might want to be a computer programmer when you grow up?”

 

“Maybe,” Willow tilted her head to the side. “I did get that offer from Hammer Industries last year but, if I was going to work anywhere, I think I’d rather work for Stark Industries.  Hammer Industries might claim to be the best, but everyone knows that Stark Industries always beats them.”

 

Xander’s conscience niggled him, maybe he should tell Willow about Tony being his father. It seemed wrong to keep such a huge secret from her, particularly knowing how much she respected Tony Stark.

 

“That’s why I should have got to meet him instead of you!” Willow continued. “Maybe, then, I could have impressed him and he would have offered me a job.”

 

“What? You don’t think I could have impressed him?” Xander asked with false lightness, any urge to let Willow in on his secret quashed. 

 

“What with?” Willow answered acerbically. “Your Star Wars knowledge?”

 

Xander clenched his teeth angrily, before he managed to calm himself down. There was no point in getting mad at Willow because she was being honest. If he hadn’t been Tony’s son, they would have had absolutely nothing to talk about and, despite their relation, Xander doubted Tony had been even slightly impressed by him. He must have been a big disappointment to the man - the least intelligent person with Stark blood in generations.

 

“Sorry,” Willow said, after a few seconds. “That was almost Cordelia-like, but then, I guess now that you’re dating her, you’re used to it.”

 

Xander sighed. One of the differences between Cordelia and Willow was that most of the time when Cordelia said something mean, she didn’t really mean it, well, except for when she was talking about Willow and Buffy (she really hated them for some reason and it was only getting worse), but when Willow said something bitchy you knew that she really meant it.

 

“It’s fine.” Xander told her.

 

“Anyway,” Willow started, with forced cheerfulness. “Are you looking forward to dinner? I can’t believe that Stark Industries is paying for us all to have dinner at the hotel.”

 

Xander had found it hard to believe too, right up until he’d found out that the man had thrown four Science Symposiums and spent millions of dollars just to meet him. Feeding a dozen teenagers dinner didn’t seem all that extravagant in comparison.

 

“I wonder if they have steak.” Xander pondered. 

 

Willow grimaced. “I hope not. You’ll probably have it with all the blood oozing out.”

 

“It’s the only way to eat steak.” Xander argued, not that he had much experience in the matter. “It makes it juicy!”

 

2-2-2

 

After dinner, and after Xander had been interrogated by his classmates (most of whom were just as jealous and disdainful that that he’d met Tony and wasted the opportunity by discussing Star Wars with the man as Willow was), Xander retreated up to his room and opened up the laptop that Tony had given him.

 

It was the sleekest, fastest, bestest computer Xander had ever come across and he spent more time stroking it than he was proud of. Once the computer was started, Xander spent a good half hour exploring all the programmes that were already installed on it, before carefully typing in the Hotel’s Wifi password that they had been given when they checked in.

 

The first thing he did was sign into his school email account, though he was unsurprised to find no new emails waiting for him. The only people who would have bothered emailing him in the summer - Willow, Cordelia, and Buffy - knew that there was no point since he didn’t have access to the school computers.

 

But that had changed and, while he still wouldn’t have access to wifi when he was at home, Tony had promised to teach him how to tether his laptop to his new cellphone which would have unlimited data (because Tony was paying for it). It was unbelievable, but that didn’t mean that Xander wasn’t going to enjoy the perks for however long they lasted.

 

And right now, one of the biggest perks that he could think of was having a way to keep in contact with Cordelia. He brought up a new message and began to type.

 

_ ‘Dear Cordelia, _

 

_ You’ll never believe what happened to me today. I met Tony Stark and it turns out he’s my father.’ _

 

Xander paused and stared at the computer screen. As much as he wanted to talk to someone about what he had just learnt, it felt wrong to be telling Cordelia before he had told Willow. Besides, this had quickly become his biggest secret. Did he really trust Cordelia that much?

 

He held the backspace down until the message was blank again.

 

_ ‘Hey Cordy, _

 

_ How’s Spain? I’m at the Stark’s Science Symposium in LA with Willow at the moment and so far it has been amazing. Not because of any of the dweeby science stuff, though Willow is definitely loving that, but I was randomly selected to meet Tony Stark and win a new laptop and cellphone. Which means that I’ll be able to email you when I have internet. _

 

_ Do you know when you will get back? School starts in three weeks, so I guess you’ll be back then but if you come back earlier would you like to go out for icecream or something?  _

 

_ There’s still no word from Buffy. Giles is spending all his time looking for her, but he hasn’t had any luck yet. There’s no sign of Angel either. _

 

_ Anyway, I hope you’re having a great time. _

 

_ I miss you, _

 

_ Xander’ _

 

2-2-2

 

The rest of the weekend was bizarre and Xander sort of felt as though he was living two lives. Was this how Buffy felt? Willow wanted him to attend all the lectures and workshops with her and, whenever he tried to get out of it, she’d accuse him of slacking off. But Xander wanted to spend as much time with Tony as he could (and, weirdly, Tony seemed to feel the same way). 

 

Tony was unlike any other adult that Xander had ever met, except maybe Jesse’s parents. He seemed to actually care about Xander and about what he had to say. He listened patiently to Xander’s questions and never laughed at him, or made him feel stupid. Not to mention that he was really fun to talk to.

 

It was scary how easy it was to like and trust Tony. Was it because they were related? Except that didn’t make sense, because Xander was related to his mum and he didn’t particularly like or trust her. Was it because Tony was so charming? Did he make everyone like him? 

 

Despite Xander’s doubts, and the fact that he was still partly convinced that this was all some kind of dream, he was tempted to ask Tony to sue for custody of him after all. 

 

Except he couldn’t, because that would mean leaving Cordelia, and Willow, and Buffy, and the hellmouth, and besides, Tony probably wouldn’t want him around the whole time anyway. Still, despite all the reasons that he knew he needed to return to Sunnydale, Xander really didn’t want to.

 

The bus ride home wasn’t fun. Willow was mad at him for ditching her so much during the Symposium and ‘wasting the opportunity he had been given’ and had decided that she would rather sit beside Amy than him. It was disappointing that nobody else sat next to him, but not really surprising. Despite the fact that he’d spent the majority of his life on good terms with almost all of the people on the bus, they still hadn’t forgiven him for dating Cordelia. Apparently they, like Willow, saw it as a betrayal.

 

Still, it wasn’t all bad, and sitting alone gave him the opportunity to think and, when he’d ensured no one was looking, space to tether his cellphone up to his laptop and check his email again. There was one new message, from Cordelia, and Xander didn’t even bother trying to hide his excited grin as he opened the email.

 

_ ‘Xander, _

 

_ If you’re wondering why it’s taken me two days to reply, it’s because Las Palmas is a nightmare resort! I wouldn’t send my worst enemy here! When I think resort, I think lying peacefully on the sand, but they won’t let me. They keep ordering me around and making me go on walks. I keep telling them that if I had wanted to spend my summer walking I would have gone on one of those pilgrim things, but they’re not listening to me! _

 

_ When Daddy said that we were going to Las Palmas, I thought we were going to the resort in Spain, but we’re in Mexico! And there are so many bugs! The cockroaches here are ginormous and I keep having flashbacks to that creepy guy that tried to kill us last year. You know, the one made of cockroaches. It is seriously traumatising! I keep telling Daddy that by the time he’d paid for my therapy he’s going to wish he’d taken me to Spain! _

 

_ You met Tony Stark? Was he hot? Of course he was. Did you ask him about how he makes his hair do that wavy thing? Because you could use all the help you can get. _

 

_ Did Willow meet him to, or was it just you? I bet she was pissed if she didn’t get to meet him. I wish I could have seen her face. _

 

_ We get back on the 14th of August and I’m definitely going to be spending the two days before school in the shower trying to get rid of any trace of this horrid place. I keep telling Daddy that we need to go home sooner, but he’s refusing. I swear, I am never trusting him to take me on holiday again!  _

 

_ We should definitely meet up for ice cream though, and maybe you could come over to my house and we could swim in the pool? I’m too grossed out to swim in the pool here, I wouldn’t be surprised if one of the horrible little kids has peed in it! _

 

_ See you when I get back, _

 

_ Cordelia’ _

 

2-2-2

 

Xander cautiously let himself into the house, before poking his head into the living room. Yeap, there was his dad, exactly where he had left him. 

 

“That you, Jess?” His dad slurred, without looking away from the football game that he was watching on the tv.

 

“No, sir,” Xander hitched his bag further up his shoulder and stepped into the room. “It’s me.”

 

“Home, are you?” His dad crushed his beer can with his fist and threw it on the floor near Xander’s feet. “Get me another beer.”

 

Xander edged past his dad’s chair and into the kitchen to retrieve a beer from the fridge, before returning to the living room. “Is Mom around?”

 

His dad snatched the beer out of his hands. “She’s at that dead-end job of hers. Now, get outa here! I’m trying to watch the game!”

 

Xander stifled a sigh as he carried his bag into the hallway and then into his room, placing it on the bed. He’d been gone for the entire weekend, couldn’t his dad at least pretended to give a crap? It was always hard to come home after having been away for the night and this time seemed worse than usual. 

 

Maybe it was because his dad’s indifference towards him was so contrary to the interest Tony Stark had shown to him all weekend. Which, really, now that he thought about it, should have made it easier. After all, Tony Harris wasn’t his dad - Tony Stark was. 

 

He knew that biology didn’t always determine who someone’s dad was. After all, Jack, who he’d gone to Elementary School with, had been adopted and his adopted mom and dad had definitely been his parents. But Xander’s dad had never acted like a dad, except for when it came to punishing him, and now Xander knew that they weren’t even related. If Tony Harris wasn’t related to him, and didn’t act like a dad, and Xander didn’t really see him as a dad, then he wasn’t really his dad, was he?

 

Xander chuckled to himself as he carefully retrieved his laptop and placed it next to his pillow. That had sounded a bit like one of those riddles that he and Jessie had liked to tell each other when they were kids. 

 

So if Tony Harris wasn’t Xander’s dad, biologically or otherwise, and Tony Stark seemed willing to be cast in that role (though Xander still had doubts that the man’s interest in him would last), then he didn’t really need to care about what his dad (that was, Tony Harris) thought of him.

 

It was a freeing thought, though, at the same time, it hardly seemed real.

 

Xander finished unpacking and kicked his bag under his bed, before sitting back on his bed and opening his laptop. He’d replied to Cordelia’s email on the busride home, but maybe he ought to send Tony an email.

 

Except, no. What if it was too soon to send an email and he came across as desperate? What if Tony’s interest in him had waned as the weekend had gone on, and he had just been faking it until he could finally get rid of Xander? What if he wrote something wrong in the email and Tony was so disgusted at the idea of having a son as stupid as Xander that he wanted to cut off all contact?

 

Maybe he’d just tether his laptop to his phone data and play a game on the internet instead.

 

2-2-2

 

Xander thought that the ease at which he fell back into his old patterns was odd. Surely the new, life-changing information should have had some effect? But life went on as usual. He would sleep until midday, muck around in his room for a few hours, wander around Sunnydale for a few hours, before meeting up with Willow and Oz for dinner. Then they’d go on their nightly patrols which, unfortunately, were still only about 50% effective. Still, despite the fact that they didn’t seem to be improving, Xander thought that the fact that none of them had been killed, or even seriously injured, was definitely a win.

 

In fact, the only thing that changed in Xander’s routine was that the time previously spent mucking around in his room, was now spent mucking around on his laptop (and trying to decide whether or not to email Tony). Well, that and he missed Cordelia more. He wasn’t sure whether it was due to having email contact with her most days, or because Willow was still a mad at him, but it had him counting down the days until her plane got in.

 

He had been tempted to meet her plane at the airport, but the knowledge that both her parents would be there was enough to convince him not to. He’d only met Mr. and Mrs. Chase twice, but they had made no attempt to hide their condescension towards him and, in Mr. Chase’s case, disapproval of Cordelia’s decision to date Xander.

 

Instead, Xander had welcomed Cordelia home with a text and patiently waited until the next afternoon when Cordelia had invited him around to join her in the pool.

 

As always, the Chase’s door was opened by a maid. Xander greeted her awkwardly, before following her through the house to where Cordelia was lounging on a deck chair out the back. The sight of Cordelia in a bikini was enough to switch Xander’s brain off for a few seconds and, the next thing he knew, she was standing up.

 

“My eyes are up here, you know.” Cordelia commented, her hands on her hips. 

 

Xander flushed as he forced his eyes to move up to her face. “Uh, sorry, I just, um…”

 

“Don’t apologise.” Cordelia waved a hand dismissively. “I feel flattered. There was practically no one our age at  _ Las Palmas. _ I’ve spent the entire summer being stared at by twelve year olds and men old enough to be my father. It was gross. I’m glad to see that I haven’t lost my touch.”

 

“You haven’t,” Xander assured her quickly. “You look amazing!”

 

“You can blame the ‘structured fun’ for that.” Cordelia said, using her fingers as quote marks. “I’ve never walked so much in my life. How was your summer?”

 

Xander shrugged. “It was alright. Willow, Oz, and I patrolled every night, except for those two nights Willow and I were in LA. I got a laptop, and a new phone, and I, uh, missed you.”

 

Cordelia’s expression softened. “I missed you too. Though, honestly, I got so bored that at one point I even missed Harmony.”

 

Xander grimaced.

 

“Exactly!” Cordelia agreed. “It was horrible, and so unnatural. I actually thought I was going insane, but then I realised that I still didn’t miss Willow, or Buffy, so that was a plus.”

 

“I don’t think Willow missed you either.” Xander acknowledged. “And I’m not convinced that Buffy’s missing any of us.”

 

“I can’t believe she hasn’t come home yet.” Cordelia said, looking almost concerned despite her tone. “When is she going to get over herself and stop sulking?”

 

“That’s the question.” Xander agreed. “Willow’s hoping she’ll be back in time for school.”

 

“Wasn’t she kicked out?” Cordelia asked. “Even if she does come back in time, it’s not like Snyder’s just going to let her back in.”

 

Xander sighed, before forcing a grin on his face. “Anyway, you promised me a swim!”

 

“So I did.” Cordelia agreed, her own face brightening. “Do you need somewhere to change?”

 

Xander shucked off his pants and top, revealing his swimming trunks underneath. “Nope, I’m like superman, except I don’t even need a phone booth.”

 

Cordelia eyed his bare chest with blatant appreciation. “You’re not looking so bad yourself.”

 

“Thanks,” Xander could feel his face flushing and he barely managed to prevent himself from crossing his arms over his chest as some kind of protection. Hearing compliments about his body was not something that normally happened to him. In fact, he thought this was the second time ever. (The first being when he went undercover with the swim team.) “You can probably blame that on the fact that I’ve been patrolling every night.”

 

“It’s a good look on you.” Cordelia assured him, before turning towards the pool and diving in. She looked like some kind of sea creature, Xander decided, as he watched her body slice through the water. Except not the kind of sea creature that the swim team had turned into, ick, gross, more like a mermaid.

 

“Are you coming?” Cordelia asked, after her head broke through the water.

 

Xander grinned and dove towards her, aiming for ultimate splash effect, before grabbing for her legs under the water. She kicked out, only missing his head by an inch, and glared as Xander came up for air.

 

“Xander!” 

 

Xander grinned unrepentantly. “Sorry, your legs were just in my way.”

 

“Only because you were aiming for them!” Cordelia accused. 

 

“That is one way of looking at it.” Xander admitted. “I just couldn’t help myself. Your legs are just so tempting.”

 

Cordelia glared at him. “Yeah? Well, control yourself, or I might just do this!” She splashed him in the face.

 

Xander blinked water out of his eyes and gaped at her in surprise. “Oh, it’s on!”

 

2-2-2

 

The next day was the first day of school and Xander barely managed to make it to school in time for homeroom. Why couldn’t school start at a reasonable time? Like one thirty? Didn’t they know that he’d been out patrolling with Willow, Oz, and Cordelia until after midnight?

 

After homeroom was AP Calculus BC which he had only chosen because Willow had chosen it and he’d been selecting the same classes as her since their freshman year. Their teacher, Mrs. O’Connell, didn’t look impressed to see Xander in her class, teachers rarely did, but at least she didn’t say anything.

 

Maths wasn’t Xander’s strongest subject, mostly because the lack of an obvious practical application annoyed him, but he was determined to succeed in all his classes during his Senior Year. He knew he wasn’t as smart as Tony was, or as Howard Stark had been, and he never would be; but he figured that the least he could do was try his best. And that way, if he ever worked up the courage to contact Tony, or if Tony ever decided that he wanted to contact him again, maybe his father would be proud of him.

 

It wouldn’t be easy though. Not only were his teachers likely to get suspicious when his grades rose by more than a grade (if he was actually capable of that), but he doubted that Willow and Buffy would appreciate discovering that he hadn’t been entirely honest with them. (Not to mention the fit Willow was likely to throw if Xander ever managed to get a higher grade than her - unlikely though that was.)

 

Willow looked surprised to see him in the class too. About as surprised as Xander felt to see Oz there. Wasn’t Oz some kind of genius? How had he managed to flunk school so badly that he had to repeat? (Surely he hadn’t done it so that he could stay at school with Willow, because that would be just sad!) 

 

Xander spent lunch outside with Cordelia, Willow, and Oz, trying not to notice that Buffy wasn’t there. Thankfully, Oz’s unexpected presence seemed to be distracting Willow since she wasn’t nearly as distraught at Buffy’s absence as Xander had thought she would be. Despite the fact that the four of them were sitting together, the two couples didn’t interact much. Cordelia spent most of the time telling Xander about her plans for the cheerleading squad, and Willow spent most of the time explaining to Oz her complex emotions regarding his unexpected return to school.

 

It felt strange to sit so close to Willow and not speak to her and, in a way, it made Xander miss Buffy all the more. If Buffy had been there they would have been forced to interact as a group or leave her out. 

 

Still, despite how strange it felt, Xander was almost relieved to be able to just talk to Cordelia. He’d spent the entire summer with Willow and Oz and had seen Wills every day. Not unusual for him, but what was unusual was how sick of her he had gotten. The first part hadn’t been too bad, but the last two weeks had made him want to pull his hair out (or hers, he wasn’t fussed). 

 

She had been constantly harping on about he had wasted opportunities at the Science Symposium, frequently talking about how sure she was that Buffy would be home any day, and bitching about Cordelia whenever she had a thought to spare. 

Xander’s emotion felt out of place. Willow was one of his best friends, she had been since Elementary school. She and Jesse had been the only happy constants in his life for years. Now Jesse was dead, Xander was dating Cordelia, Tony Stark was his father, and Willow was driving him crazy. Was the world going mad?

 

2-2-2

 

It was a week later, when they were out on patrol, that they came across Buffy. Xander been worried about her all summer - he had been half convinced that she was dead - and the sight of her happy and healthy sent a flash of rage through him. How dare she come back as though nothing had happened? She’d been gone for months and then she was just going to swan back in and kill the vampire they had been fighting as though it was nothing? As though they hadn’t been risking their lives and working their asses off all summer covering for her absence? And without an apology?

 

She wanted to see Giles of course and, being the good little slayerettes that they were, they accompanied her to his house. It was all just so...one year ago. When Buffy had gone away for the summer (though at least that time she had told them where she was going) and had come home and been, well, a bitch! Willow, Cordelia and Miss Calendar had almost been killed because of her.

 

And maybe Buffy wasn’t acting like a bitch now, but she wasn’t apologising or offering any explanation on where she had been. If anything, it seemed as though she expected everything to automatically revert back to normal. 

 

Xander wasn’t having any of it. They’d all let Buffy off the hook without an apology for her post-summer behaviour the year before and Xander wasn’t sure he wanted to go through all that again. Did Buffy really think that they were so desperate to be her friends that they would put up with her treating them like crap? Xander might have been a year ago, but he wasn’t sure that he was now.

 

Of course, Xander knew he couldn’t really tell Buffy any of that. Giles and Willow both seemed to be willing to pretend as though nothing had happened. As though Buffy had returned from vacation, instead of wherever the hell she had been, and Xander didn’t want to be the only person calling her on her behaviour. If he did that, then Willow would probably jump to Buffy’s defence, and Giles might too, and, yeah, he was mad at Buffy, but that didn’t mean he wanted to commit social suicide.

 

Neither did he want to spend one-on-one time with her though. She had made it clear that she didn’t want to talk about what had happened and Xander wasn’t feeling in sharing mood either. Chances were that, if they hung out, Xander would end up yelling at her despite his good intentions. So he came up with an excuse, which would have worked an awful lot better if Cordelia hadn’t left him hanging.

 

“You couldn’t back me up?” Xander asked her later, while she was dropping him home. “It looked like I was avoiding Buffy.”

 

“You are avoiding Buffy.” Cordelia pointed out. “Besides, what did you want me to do? Let them think we’re having sex?”

 

“What?” Xander yelped, before clearing his throat in embarrassment. “What? Why was that the only other option?”

 

“What were they supposed to think? You put your hands on my arm and squeezed!”

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open. “That’s sign language for sex? Why did no one tell me that? My Aunt Mabel does that to me all the time.”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Why didn’t you just hang out with Buffy? What would it hurt?”

 

“I don’t know, maybe our entire friendship? Seeing Buffy makes me want to yell at her, and shake her, and tell her she has to apologise. Somehow, I don’t see that going over well with her.”

 

“Yeah, Buffy’s not so big on apologies.” Cordelia agreed. “Not that I blame her, mind you. Why admit to being wrong if you don’t have to?”

 

“Maybe to make your friends who feel abandoned and betrayed feel better.” Xander retorted. “To let them know that you get that what you did really screwed them over and that you won’t do it again.”

 

“Why does it matter so much to you?” Cordelia asked, as she pulled her car into Xander’s driveway. “It’s not like you’re her mom. I wouldn’t care if Harmony ran away.”

 

“That’s because Harmony’s a horrible person.” Xander pointed out. “Would you care if I disappeared for months?”

 

“Well, yes,” Cordelia admitted. “But you’re my boyfriend.”

 

“And Buffy’s my best friend.”

 

“I thought Buffy’s best friend was Willow and that Willow’s best friend was Buffy?” Cordelia asked.

 

“Well, my best friend was turned into a vampire two years ago last Wednesday, and then I had to stake him.” Xander told her. “So, I’m pretty low on best friend candidates.”

 

“Jesse.” Cordelia acknowledged with a sad smile. “He was…”

 

“Creepy.” Xander finished for her. “It’s alright. You can say it. He treated you even worse that I treated Buffy during our sophomore year. I’d like to put both of our behaviour down to the fact that we were young, but even that’s not a good excuse.”

 

“You grew out of it though.” Cordelia offered. “I guess it’s too bad that Jesse never got the chance to.”

 

“Yeah,” Xander agreed. “You know what really gets me about this whole thing? I’ve run through every scenario I can think of of what might of happened to make Buffy run away and the worst I can come up with is that Willow’s spell worked, but Buffy still had to kill him for some reason. Which, yeah, that would be horrible, but when I staked Jesse, I hardly understood anything about what it meant that he’d been turned. All I knew was that my best friend was dead and gone, I had been the one to make him gone, and no one really cared. 

 

“I didn’t run away. I didn’t get mad. Buffy and Giles barely even seemed to care that he was gone and, yeah, so they didn’t really know him, but I had just staked my best friend and nobody cared. Even Willow seemed to just forget that he had ever existed and replace him with Buffy. And now Buffy’s maybe had to do the same thing, only because she’s ‘the slayer’ and because Angel was her boyfriend, it’s this great big deal?!”

 

“Wow,” Cordelia said, after a long pause. “Been holding onto that for long?”

 

“I know that I’m just, uh, speculating.” Xander confessed. “But the double standard just makes me so mad!”

 

“Well, you know I’m not exactly Buffy’s biggest fan,” Cordelia started. “But I do kind of get where she’s coming from. I’m not saying that she’s right,” She rushed to add. “But clearly something nasty went on in the mansion and, between that, and being kicked out of school, and being wanted for Kendra’s murder, I think she deserved to have some kind of breakdown. I think you deserved to have a breakdown after Jesse died too.”

 

Xander let out a choked laugh. “Men aren’t allowed to have breakdowns.”

 

“Maybe they should be.” Cordelia said, reaching for Xander’s hand.

 

Xander squeezed it gratefully, before making a decision. “So, you know how I met Tony Stark last month?”

 

Cordelia let out an exasperated sigh. “Are you allergic to emotions or something? Because we were having a moment!”

 

“I know, I’m actually continuing the moment.” Xander defended. “Now shut up and let me talk before I lose my nerve.”

 

“Alright,” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Go ahead.”

 

“Apparently my dad isn’t actually my dad.” Xander said, the words almost falling over themselves in his rush to get them out. “He and Mum only got together after she was pregnant.”

 

Cordelia looked surprised. “Wow.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“But what does that have to do with…” Cordelia’s mouth dropped open. “No way! You can’t be serious? Of course you’re not serious.” She hit him on the arm. “Doofus! We were having a moment!”

 

“I’m serious!” Xander told her. “Tony Stark told me himself. He showed me the DNA test results. Apparently he arranged all of the Stark Science Symposiums just so he could meet me.”

 

Cordelia reach forward to switch on the car’s inside light, before studying his expression. “Are you serious?”

 

“It’s crazy, right?” Xander asked, letting out an embarrassingly hysterical laugh. “I’m Xander Harris, ultimate loser, all my relatives are deadbeats and, to be honest, I’ve always been convinced that I’ll be one too. Except, Tony Stark is my father. Iron Man is my dad!”

 

Cordelia hit him on the arm again. “Don’t call yourself a loser. Would I date a loser?”

 

“Ow!” Xander protested, rubbing his arm. “That hurt.”

 

“Don’t be a baby.” Cordelia scoffed. “You didn’t complain last time. 

 

“That’s because the second hit always hurts more.” Xander told her. “Have you been working out?”

 

“I’m a cheerleader.” Cordelia reminded him. “What do you think we do all practise? Fluff pom poms?”

 

“Well, yeah.”

 

Cordelia hit him again. “That’s it. You’re coming to our next practise. I bet you couldn’t do half the stuff we do. I doubt even Buffy couldn’t do it all without practicing.”

 

“But…”

 

“And back to the fact that Tony Stark is your father,” Cordelia continued, as though he hadn’t said anything. “You’ve known this for what? Four weeks and you didn’t tell me?”

 

“If it makes you feel better, I haven’t told Willow.” Xander offered. “I haven’t told anyone.”

 

“Not even your mom?”

 

“Especially not Mom.” Xander said with feeling. “They’ve been getting payments from Stark Industries since I was born.”

 

“So why were you always dressed like a colour blind, homeless person?” Cordelia asked.

 

“Good question.” 

 

“Not that I’m not glad, and a little smug, that you told me first,” Cordelia started. “But, why haven’t you told Willow yet?”

 

“I was going to.” Xander answered. “But then she kept going on about how she should have gotten to meet Tony instead of me, and how it was wasted on someone like me. It made me mad, so I didn’t tell her. And the more I didn’t tell her, the less I wanted to.”

 

“So you told me.” Cordelia commented happily. “Are you going to tell her and Buffy?”

 

“I’ll have to eventually.” Xander pointed out. “But I think I’ll just play it by ear. Willow’s been driving me crazy and Buffy’s, well, you know. I think I just need some space.”

 

Cordelia looked almost predatory. “Does that mean that you might be willing to hang out with some of my friends?”

 

“You mean like Harmony?” Xander asked.

 

“I mean, like, attending some of the parties that only the elite are invited to.” Cordelia corrected. “We don’t have to be losers just because you hang out with losers, you know. We could rule the school if we wanted to.”

 

2-2-2

 

Admittedly, the hootenanny they threw at Buffy’s house was a mistake, as was jumping on Mrs. Summers’ ‘angry at Buffy’ bandwagon, but Xander couldn’t believe that Willow and Mrs. Summers seemed willing to just let everything go because they had fought a few zombies. Not only did it seem completely illogical (nothing had changed and, as far as he knew, Buffy still hadn’t apologised), but it left Xander out in the cold. Because he was not ready to let it all go. Buffy still seemed so caught up in her poor-Buffyfest and didn’t seem to realise that her actions had affected them. If they just let her off the hook, like they had the year before, what was to stop her from doing it again and again?

 

Still, as Xander watched Buffy and Mrs. Summers hug each other, he couldn’t help but be jealous. Despite everything, Mrs. Summers still seemed to love Buffy more than his parents had ever loved him. His mom only ever hugged him when she was drunk off her feet and he couldn’t remember his father ever hugging him. It must be nice for Buffy to have a parent who loved her like that. Xander wished that…

 

But wait, maybe he did have a parent like that. Or, if not a parent like that, at least a parent who had cared enough to arrange four Symposiums just to meet him. What had he been thinking, not emailing Tony? Sure maybe Tony wouldn’t be interested, but what was the worst that could happen? 

 

Xander quietly stepped out of the circle that had gathered around Buffy and Joyce, and made his way to the door.

 

“Where are you going?” Cordelia asked quietly, as she met him in front of the door.

 

“I need to email Tony.” Xander whispered.

 

“I’ll give you a ride.” Cordelia offered. “It’s not as though I want to be stuck here without you.”

 

Xander accepted her offer with a smile, before following her out to her car.

 

“Those zombies better not have scratched it.” Cordelia commented, as she got in.

 

“I’m sure your insurance will handle it.” Xander pointed out. “Though you might want to put something other than ‘zombie attack’ on your form.”

 

“It’s not the insurance I’m worried about.” Cordelia turned the car on and pulled out onto the road. “Daddy will completely freak if I ruin another car. He still hasn’t forgiven me for when Oz tore his car roof to pieces. Why do you need to email Tony, anyway?”

 

“I haven’t contacted him since the Symposium.” Xander admitted.

 

Cordelia gave him a sharp look. “Why not?”

 

Xander shrugged. “It felt weird.”

 

“Well, duh!” Cordelia retorted. “But that’s no reason not to do it.”

 

“That’s what I realised tonight.”

 

“Was it the almost dying or the sickly sweet reconciliation that did it for you?” Cordelia asked.

 

“I almost die two nights out of every three.” Xander pointed out.

 

“So it was the reconciliation.” Cordelia concluded. “Are you still mad at her?”

 

“Yeah,” Xander sighed. “Are you?”

 

“The difference between you and me, Xander, is that I think Buffy is a selfish bitch so, when she acts like a selfish bitch, it doesn’t really bother me. Buffy’s your perfect, can’t do wrong, hero, so when she acts like a selfish bitch it comes as a shock to you.”

 

Xander sighed again. “I know she can do wrong. I’ve known that for a while. I just, I guess I thought that I meant as much to her as she meant to me.”

 

After Cordelia had dropped him off, Xander quietly let himself into the house before tiptoeing his way to his bedroom. Once there, he lay back on his bed and opened his laptop.

 

‘ _ Dear Tony, _

 

_ Hi. Sorry it’s taken me so long to email you. It’s been a bit of a crazy month. You know that friend I told you about, the one who ran away? She came back, so we’ve been dealing with that. _

 

_ My classes are going well. Did I tell that I’m taking AP Calculus BC, AP Physics B, and AP English Literature and Composition? I’m working harder than ever have before too, and it’s pretty great to see the shocked disbelief on my teacher’s faces when they grade my homework. _

 

_ I hope you have had a good month, _

 

_ Xander’ _

 

2-2-2

 

Saying goodbye to Xander was one of the hardest things Tony had ever had to do. He’d had a blast getting to the know the teenager over the weekend and, while he knew that Xander needed to go home, the idea of letting him go back to his awful parents just didn’t seem right.

 

Still, it was the boy’s choice and Tony wasn’t convinced that a life with him would be any better. After all, he wasn’t exactly renowned for his adulting competently skills. Besides, according to Pepper, this way their relationship could grow naturally, instead of being forced to develop quickly - which would apparently be bad.

 

But the relationship didn’t seem to be developing at all. A entire week went by with no contact from Xander, and then another week, and then another. It was enough to make Tony want to get into his Iron Man suit and find something to blow up (or fly to Sunnydale and visit Xander).

 

Thankfully, Tony had a to-do list longer than his arm, and so had plenty of work to keep himself distracted from Xander’s lack of contact. With Obadiah gone, it had been easy to convince the board to accept his decision to remove Stark Industries from the weapons making business, but it did mean that they needed to expand the other parts of their company - which meant Tony was kept busy coming up with new products for them to sell. 

 

So, he spend the month creating a new kind of body armour for the military (because if his weapons were out there, he wanted the soldiers to have the best kind of protection), a limited AI to be placed in the new range of cellphones that his R&D division were working on, and some new medical equipment (since his board had decided that if he wasn’t going to build weapons,  medtech was the next best option). 

 

Normally, Tony would have resented the boards’ presumption in thinking that they could decide what he invented, but at the time had just been relieved that they weren’t going to try and force him to build weapons. Not to mention that it was almost poetic. He’d spent most of his life building things that hurt people, it seemed right that he’d now turn his attention to building things that could fix people.

 

In between his work for Stark Industries, Tony focussed his attention on upgrading his Ironman suit and experimenting with arc reactor tech. Clean energy was possibly the biggest concern of the future and nothing they had so far would be any use in solving the problem. Wind power, solar power, and water power were all stopgaps at best. If he could make a more efficient arc reactor. . . well, that could change everything.

 

Unfortunately, Tony suspected that any such breakthrough was a few years away at best. If only because he had yet to figure out a way to replace the Plutonium and there was no way people would accept the idea of a clean energy source that used a radioactive element that was used in nuclear bombs.

 

Despite how busy he was, Tony couldn’t help but repeatedly go over his time with Xander in his head to try and figure out why Xander hadn’t contacted him. He’d thought they’d had a good weekend, that they’d gotten along and that Xander had enjoyed his company. What had gone wrong? 

 

Had Xander been faking it all weekend, just pretending to cozy up to him incase Tony took back the laptop and cellphone? But, no, Tony didn’t think that was right. If Xander had been that kind of kid, why wouldn't he have continued milking Tony for free stuff? Not to mention, that Xander had seemed honest and genuine and Tony had spent enough time with fakers to be able to spot them from afar.

 

What if Xander had gone home and googled him? There was a lot of horrible stuff about him on the internet. Some of it true, some of it not, some of it stupid mistakes he had made when he had been in his teens, and twenties, and, well, anytime before he’d gotten a wake up call in a cave in Afghanistan. What if Xander had read it and decided he didn’t want anything to do with Tony any more?

 

“Sir?” JARVIS’ voice broke into Tony’s thoughts, exactly one month after he had said goodbye to Xander. “You have received an email from Master Alexander.”

 

Tony only just managed to stop himself from searing his skin with a his welding torch. “Really? Well, what are you waiting for? Put it up.”

 

He put the welding torch down beside the Iron Man boot that he had been working on, and turned slightly so that he could better see the hologram JARVIS was controlling.

 

‘ _ Dear Tony…’ _

 

Tony couldn’t withhold his grin as he read through the email that his son had sent him. It was almost painfully short and formal, and Tony didn’t buy Xander’s excuse for not having emailed him (according to JARVIS, Buffy Summers had only returned a few days ago - not that Tony had asked him to stalk Xander and his friends or anything), but it was something.

 

“Start a reply would you, JARVIS?” Tony asked. “Xander, Thanks for your email. It was great to hear from you… Ugh, I sound like Aunt Peggy. Scratch that, JARVIS. Xander…”

 

2-2-2


	4. ObliviatION

‘ _ Xander, _

 

_ It’s great that your friend has come home. Her name was Buffy, right? How are your other friends? From what you told me about your friend Willow I imagine she is thrilled that school is back in session. I always hated school - though I’m sure the fact that I graduated when I was 13 probably didn’t help. _

 

_ No, you didn’t tell me that you were taking some AP classes. Physics and Calculus, I get, but English? I hated English even more than I hated school!  _

 

_ I’ve been busy this month too, lots of time in my workshop, and, well, I guess you heard about my brief trip to Afghanistan last week. _

 

_ What else have you been up to this month? How is that girlfriend of yours? _

 

_ Tony’ _

 

3-3-3

 

“So Tony Stark is your father.” Cordelia commented, as she and Xander trailed Buffy and Willow through the cemetery.”

 

“Yeap.”

 

“So, what does that mean?”

 

“You mean aside from the fact that he and my mom had sex eighteen years ago?” Xander asked with a grin.

 

“Obviously.”

 

“I don’t know.” Xander admitted. 

 

“Will you inherit Stark Industries when he dies?” Cordelia asked.

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open in horror. “I hope not!”

 

Cordelia looked confused. “Why not?”

 

“Can you imagine me being in charge of a company? Let alone a company that big?” Xander exclaimed. “It would be a disaster!”

 

“Well, you’d learn the ropes first.” Cordelia pointed out. “It’s not like he’s going to die anytime soon. He’s only thirty seven.”

 

“Is it weird that you know that?” Xander asked, anxious to change the subject. “I feel as though it’s weird that you know that. I didn’t even know that.”

 

“Haven’t you googled him? It was the first thing I did when you told me.”

 

“A bit.” Xander admitted. “But I didn’t look at his age.”

 

“What did you look at?”

 

“It was more a case of trying not to look at things.” Xander answered. “No one wants to see pictures of their father in a spa with half naked women, not even if they’ve only just found out about being related to him. And did you know that there are entire websites dedicated to women talking about having had sex with him?”

 

Cordelia looked amused. “You know most of them are making it up, right?”

 

“How do you know that?” Xander asked doubtfully.

 

“It’s obvious.” Cordelia claimed. “People always make up stories to make themselves seem more important.”

 

“But why would a woman pretend to have had sex with someone she hadn’t?” Xander persisted.

 

“The same reason men would.” Cordelia looked unimpressed. “Why do men do it?”

 

“So that people will think that...oh.” Xander realised. “I’ve never considered that women might want people to think that they’d had more sex than they’ve actually had before.”

 

Cordelia glared at him. “That’s such a double standard!”

 

3-3-3

 

_ ‘Hey Tony, _

 

_ Yeah, Buffy’s the one who ran away, and yeah, Willow is thrilled to be back at school. She was a little weirded out at first though because her boyfriend, who is supposed to be this genius, is back repeating his senior year. I can’t imagine anyone choosing to spend an extra year at high school, not even for a girl. _

 

_ Buffy’s not allowed not allowed back at school though. Our principle hates her and is refusing to reverse her expulsion - even though the charges against her were dropped. It’s actually kind of nice not to have her around though. Her boyfriend kind of went insane last year and started stalking her, and then suddenly disappeared in July, so when she’s around we do our best not to be too coupley, if you know what I mean. _

 

_ Cordelia, my girlfriend, is great. She’s the only one I’ve told about you and she’s been really cool about it all. She’s the captain of our school’s Cheerleading Squad, so she’d been really busy this week setting everything up. She’s made me attend most of the practises too as punishment for a comment I made about cheerleaders a week ago. It turns out cheerleaders do a lot more than fluff pompoms. It’s not so bad though, I normally spend the time working on my Calculus homework. _

 

_ What are you building at the moment? _

 

_ Xander’ _

 

3-3-3

 

“Leg straight, Abby! Honestly, how do you not get this yet?”

 

Xander looked up from the maths problem in front of him and tried not to grin at the sight in front of him. Cordelia was standing in front of the other cheerleaders, her hands on her hips, and she looked ready to rip them to shreds. He loved watching Cordelia yelling at people (so long as it wasn’t him she was yelling at).

 

He looked back down at the paper in front of him, before looking up again almost immediately when someone sat down beside him. 

 

“So this is where you’ve been hiding out.” Oz commented.

 

“I’m not hiding.” Xander defended. “I’m being held prisoner. Cordy’s proving a point. A point that was proven over a week ago, I might add, but apparently she doesn’t think I’ve learnt my lesson.”

 

“Some punishment.” Oz commented, as they watched one of the girls put her leg behind her head. “Cordelia must be losing her touch.”

 

Xander grinned. “Yeah, well, I didn’t say I was suffering, did I?”

 

“Willow’s worried about you.” Oz said, after a long silence.

 

Xander frowned out at where Cordelia had the cheerleaders running through one of their routines again. “I’m fine.”

 

“She thinks you’re still mad at Buffy.”

 

“Any reason why I shouldn’t be?” Xander asked, watching impassionately as the girl on the top of the pyramid almost fell off. 

 

“That’s not really any of my business.” Oz acknowledged.

 

“And yet, you’re here.”

 

“So I am.”

 

“What else does Willow think?” Xander asked, after a few minutes silence.

 

“That Cordelia is luring you away from her.”

 

“Cordelia doesn’t think that it was a waste of Tony Stark’s time to meet me.” Xander pointed out. “And she’s okay with letting me be mad at Buffy.”

 

“You and Willow have been friends for a long time.” Oz said neutrally.

 

“So have you and Devon.” Xander returned. “You planning on inviting him over in ten years so he can be your kids’ drug dealer?” There was a long pause, before Xander added. “Willow’s one of my best friends, me dating Cordelia doesn’t change that.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

“What are you going to tell Willow?” Xander asked, after another few minutes of silence.

 

“That I talked to you and you’re fine.” Oz paused. “That she’s one of your best friends.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Oz nodded. “See you around.”

 

3-3-3

 

_ ‘Xander, _

 

_ At the moment I’m working on a new kind of MRI, though without the magnetic part, so it won’t be like an MRI at all. With all the bullet and shrapnel wounds that people get, and metal plates, screws, and pins that are used in surgery, it’s impractical to have a medical imaging machine that can’t be used when there is metal in the body - and my board tells me that it will make SI a heck of a lot of money. Money isn’t usually a deciding factor for me, I always left that side of things up to Obie, but I’m trying to play nice with them at the moment. _

 

_ Your friend Buffy sounds like she’s had a rough year and her ex sounds like a piece of work. What kind of things was she charged with? I’ve never actually been arrested, despite what the internet might tell you. Though, given some of the stupid stuff I’ve done, my lack of criminal record is more due to luck than anything else. _

 

_ Cordelia sounds a lot like Pepper and I look forward to meeting her one day. _

 

_ I can’t believe one of your friends is repeating a year on purpose! That’s just insane. I got out of high school as soon as I possibly could. You know what else is insane? Underestimating cheerleaders. Bad move! _

 

_ How are your classes going? _

 

_ Tony’ _

 

3-3-3

 

Xander looked up as his teacher dropped his marked test onto the desk in front of him.

 

Mrs. O’Connell shot him a suspicious glare, before moving along the row and dropping Willow’s test on her desk.

 

Xander turned his attention away from his teacher and to his test, and most importantly, to the big red letter in the top right hand corner.

 

He’d gotten an A? Wow, no wonder Mrs. O’Connell had glared at him like that. She probably thought he’d cheated or something. Still, an A was great! It was the best mark he’d ever gotten (probably because it was the only test he’d ever tried his best at).

 

“What did you get, Xander?” 

 

Xander quickly flicked the paper over before she could see his mark. Did he really want to admit that he’d gotten such a high grade? Willow really wasn’t known for her ability to control her words. Still, hadn’t he decided that he was going to do his best this year, regardless of what his friends thought?

 

“I got an A.” Xander admitted, looking over at her. “What about you?”

 

“An A?” Willow asked loudly, her smile disappearing. “You never get As!”

 

“I spent ages studying for it.” Xander confessed.

 

“When exactly?” Willow asked. “When you were making out with Cordelia, or when you were perving on the cheerleader practises?”

 

“The second one actually.” Xander said, his stomach twisting at her tone.

 

“As if!” Willow snorted. “How’d you really do it?”

 

“I studied.” Xander repeated firmly, trying to ignore the way the entire class had fallen silent to watch their argument. “I’ve decided I want to do my best this year.”

 

“That’s very commendable, Mister Harris.” Mrs. O’Connell told him, returning to the front of the room. “Now, if you will all turn to page fourteen, we will get started.”

 

“I can’t believe you cheated.” Willow whispered, with a disapproving scowl. “What were you thinking?”

 

“I didn’t cheat!” Xander defended, as he turned to the right page.

 

“Then how do you explain this?” Willow asked, brandishing her own assignment which declared her grade to be an A-. 

 

Xander grimaced. “I don’t know. Maybe because you spend more time practising spells than you do studying for tests?”

 

“Mister Harris, Miss Rosenburg.” Mrs. O’Connell called for their attention. “I presume you are done with your discussion and I can return to teaching my class?”

 

3-3-3

 

_ ‘Tony,  _

 

_ That sounds so cool! How long do you think it will take for you to make it? _

 

_ My classes are going well. I got my first Calculus test back today, I got an A! My friend Willow is furious with me though. She thinks I cheated (I didn’t! I just studied a lot harder than usual). She’ll get over it, she always does, but I’m getting really sick of her doubting me.  _

 

_ Buffy was actually charged with murdering a friend of ours - Kendra. She didn’t do it, of course, but she was the one who found her body and Snyder, our principle, convinced the police that it had probably been her. _

 

_ Buffy still isn’t allowed back at school, but apparently her mom has a meeting with the school board tomorrow. I’m not sure how I feel about the entire thing. She never apologised for running away and making us all worry, and seems to have put the entire thing behind her. So has everyone else, so it’s just me being a jerk now...Sorry, I shouldn’t be sharing my stupid teenaged dramas with you. They probably seem ridiculously insignificant compared to your adult stuff. Maybe I should just get over it. _

 

_ I’m sure Cordelia would love to meet you. She has a lot of questions for you, not the least being ‘how do you get your hair to do that curly thing?’ Apparently I need to learn to do it too. _

 

_ How’s your week been? _

 

_ Xander’ _

 

3-3-3

 

“I’m sorry for accusing you of cheating.”

 

Xander crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at Willow. 

 

“I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions.” Willow continued, her eyes darting towards where Oz was standing a few feet away from them.

 

“You should have known that I would never cheat.” Xander corrected. “We’ve been friends since Kindergarten, Wils. When have I ever cheated?”

 

“What was I supposed to think?” Willow asked defensively. “You’ve never gotten an A before either. How was I supposed to know that you’d actually just been lying to me this whole time?!”

 

“I wasn’t exactly lying,” Xander explained. “Sure I wasn’t being entirely honest, but I never told you that the reason I got average grades was because I wasn’t smart. I just, didn’t try as hard as I pretended to.”

 

“And all that time that I spent tutoring you?” Willow asked.

 

“You were tutoring Jesse at first,” Xander pointed out. “But I didn’t want him to feel stupid, so I joined in. Jesse was great, but he wasn’t that smart, you know. And then, after he died, I guess I just wanted a bit of normalcy and some of that maths stuff really was hard.”

 

“And suddenly you’re over that now?” Willow asked. “You can’t be mad at me for accusing you of cheating when you weren’t honest with me about any of this.”

 

“Yes, I can.” Xander argued. “You get to be mad at me for not being entirely truthful, and I get to be mad at you for accusing me of cheating  _ in front of our entire class. _ I got called into see Snyder because of you!”

 

“You would have been called in to see him anyway.” Willow told him. “It’s not like the entire class wasn’t already thinking it!”

 

“I’m sorry I misled you.” Xander told her seriously. “I never meant to hurt you.”

 

“I didn’t mean to hurt you either.” Willow agreed, stepping closer to give him a hug. “I shouldn’t have accused you in front of the class.” 

 

Xander stepped out of her hug. “You shouldn’t have accused me at all!”

 

“That what I meant.” Willow protested. “Now, are we good?”

 

Xander eyed her hopefully expression uneasily, before quirking a smile. “Of course we are.”

 

The problem was, he wasn’t sure that he believed himself. 

 

3-3-3

 

_ ‘Xander, _

 

_ I’m not qualified to give any kind of advice, but I’m pretty sure that’s kind of a father’s job. Is it? _

 

_ So, I asked Pepper, she knows this kind of stuff and she said that: _

 

_ You shouldn’t just get over it, but you should probably forgive her (apparently holding grudges hurts the grudge holder as much as the grudge holdee - I’m not convinced, but Pepper swears it’s true). I have no idea what that means though, maybe I should have gotten Pepper to reply to your email instead. Pepper wanted me to tell you that the advice applies to Willow too. _

 

_ I got accused of cheating once when I was in highschool. I was thirteen and had gotten the best test score out of the entire class (who were all sixteen and seventeen). Of course nobody took it seriously because I was a Stark, I guess you don’t really have that protection. (Unless you want it, because just say the word and I’ll fly to Sunnydale and have a word with your principal.) _

 

_ I’m hoping that the medical imaging unit will be done in the next few months. It will still have to go through a lot of tests, but by then I should have managed to iron out most the kinks. _

 

_ Regarding the curl in my hair, well, I’m not really sure what to tell you, except that I put some kind of gunk through it and then comb it into place. Though half the time my hair stays because it’s filled with grease. _

 

_ I hope this situation with your friend works out, _

 

_ Tony’ _

 

3-3-3

 

Xander reread Tony’s email with a frown. He didn’t get what Pepper’s advice meant either. If he forgave Buffy, wasn’t that just getting over it? How were they different?

 

He wasn’t sure how he felt about Tony sharing his emails with Pepper either, though, he supposed that she had seemed nice and Tony seemed really close to her. Xander could remember Tony commenting that Pepper, Happy, and a guy called Rhodey were the closest thing he had to family - aside from Xander that was.

 

There was something that Xander knew for sure though. He loved that Tony had actually taken to give Xander advice. In fact, when seen from that perspective, Tony having asked Pepper for help with it made it even better. His parents had never cared about what was going on in his life, and the closest thing to advice that Tony Harris had ever given him had been about what kind of alcohol to buy (not the cheap stuff, and not the expensive stuff). But Tony had apparently cared so much that he’d done some research to make sure he was giving good advice.

 

The fact that the advice made no sense didn’t matter, it was the thought that counted. (And maybe Cordelia would be able to interpret it for him.)

 

“It’s like me and Harmony.” Cordelia told him the next day, as they were walking from AP English Lit to meet Buffy for lunch outside of school grounds. “I’ve forgiven her for trying to ostracise me in February...”

 

“You have?” Xander asked in disbelief. “But you hardly talk to her anymore.”

 

“I talk to her.” Cordelia defended. “I have to - she’s my second-in-command for cheerleading. I haven’t gotten over it though and we’re never going to be friends like we were.”

 

“So I should forgive Buffy but not talk to her much anymore?” Xander questioned in confusion. “Wouldn’t that be awkward though? We hang out with her all the time.”

 

“We don’t have to.” Cordelia pointed out archly. “What I’m saying is that you can forgive Buffy and Willow, and still remember that they’re selfish bitches who can’t be trusted.”

 

Xander grimaced. “That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it? Besides, I’ve already forgiven Willow.”

 

Cordelia eyed Xander skeptically. “Forgiving Buffy doesn’t mean you forget what she’s done, it just means you’re not mad at her anymore.”

 

“That makes sense.” Xander nodded slowly. “Wouldn’t just be easier if I got over it though? That way we could go back to being friends like before.”

 

“Sure, if you were twelve.” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Besides, next time Buffy did something to prove that she’s a selfish bitch you’d be hurt all over again. At least this way you’ll be expecting it.”

 

“Do you expect the worst in everyone?” Xander asked, as they approached where Willow and Oz were standing on the edge of the school steps.

 

“I expect people to do the things they’ve done before.” Cordelia explained. “For example, I expect Willow to freak out about leaving school grounds, just like she freaked about me parking in the parking spaces reserved for seniors, and just like she freaked out about putting her books in one of the senior lockers.”

 

Xander grinned at the memory. “Yeah, Willow does seem to be struggling to adapt to Senior life.”

 

Oz turned around and did a sort of head tilt thing and Xander took it as a cue to grab Willow’s other hand and help Oz carry her off school property.

 

“Oh,” Willow protested. “No, I can’t!”

 

Having lunch with Buffy was surprisingly enjoyable, though Xander did miss being able to cuddle with Cordelia while they ate. Still, Willow had a point and it wouldn’t be fair to Buffy for them to rub their healthy, happy relationships in her face when she was still so obviously grieving for Angel. Though, judging by the look she had sent in Scott Hope’s direction, she seemed to be working her way through her grief.

 

As they ate, Xander considered what Cordelia had said. Could he forgive Buffy and stop being mad at her?

 

Yes and, despite what he’s said to Cordelia, knowing that he didn’t have to act as though it had never happened actually made it easier. He hadn’t wanted to let Buffy off the hook, but neither could he force Buffy onto the hook if she wasn’t willing to be there. This way things could go back to mostly normal, but he got to remember that he couldn’t entirely trust her. It seemed like a win, win situation and, when Xander heard from Willow the next day that Buffy had been reinstated as a Sunnydale student (so long as she pass a few tests) he realised that he’d come to his conclusion not a moment too soon. 

 

It had been easy enough to be angry at Buffy when he had only seen her for a few hours every few days, but he doubted he would have managed to hold out for long with her back at school. Either he would have caved to the pressure and just gotten over it like Willow and Giles had, or he would have said something stupid and possibly destroyed his friendships with both Buffy and Willow. This way was much better.

 

3-3-3

 

Meeting Faith was...different. Xander could honestly say that he had never met anyone like her. She was like a much more brash version of Cordelia: honest, unashamed, and hot - though admittedly in more of an ‘in your face’ sort of way.

 

She was also incredibly different from Buffy. It was odd, really. Next to Kendra, Buffy had seemed spontaneous and unconstrained but compared to Faith, she seemed just as rigid and personalityless as Kendra had seemed sometimes.

 

“It’s hard to believe that she’s only been a slayer for three months.” Xander commented to Cordelia as they sat in her car in his driveway. “How can she have that many amazing stories in just three months?”

 

“Did you even consider the fact that she might be embellishing her stories?” Cordelia asked, sounding unimpressed. 

 

Xander turned to her in surprise. “You think she was lying?”

 

“I think there’s something off about her.” Cordelia confessed, before glaring at him. “And not just because her presence had you doing a Devon MacLeish impression.”

 

“What?” Xander asked in surprise. “I wasn’t, I swear.”

 

“You weren’t thinking about cheating on me with her?” Cordelia challenged him. 

 

“Not at all.” Xander reassured her quickly. “She’s hot, sure, but I like you better.”

 

Cordelia studied him for a few seconds, before her expression softened. “Yeah, well, try not to be so obvious about it next time you think a girl is hot. It’s embarrassing for all of us.”

 

“Sorry.” Xander said, infusing every bit of meaning into his voice. “I just got distracted by some of her stories.”

 

Cordelia snorted. “I could tell. At least she has some more spark that Buffy.”

 

Xander stared at her in surprise. “You like her!”

 

“I do not.” Cordelia denied sharply. “I was right when I called her a ‘slut-o-rama’. She’s rude, and crude and…”

 

“Honest.” Xander finished for her. “You like her better than Buffy!”

 

“Like that’s hard.” Cordelia pointed out acerbically. “Did you see Buffy tonight? She couldn’t stand the fact that the attention was on someone other than her.”

 

“Buffy didn’t like Kendra at first either.” Xander reminded her. “She’ll come around.”

 

“You know you’re not actually saying anything that opposes my point, right?” Cordelia asked. “Buffy’s used to being the one and only supergirl. Maybe some competition will do her good.”

 

3-3-3

 

Watching Buffy introduce Faith to Giles was more amusing than anything. He could see it now that Cordelia had mentioned it: the way she timed everything she said for maximum effect; the way she seemed less concerned about a story’s accuracy than how it sounded; the way she seemed to pick her stories and comments to suit her audience. Personally, Xander’s favourite comment of the day was when she described Giles as being ‘young and cute’.

 

Willow’s attempt to matchmake, or friend-make, seemed like a terrible idea to Xander though. Really, what had she been thinking suggesting (however nonverbally) that Buffy invite Faith over for dinner? Buffy’s frustration with Faith was as obvious as Giles’ frustration at not having been invited to the Watchers’ Retreat.

 

So Xander did what he could to separate them until dinnertime, though he wasn’t sure whether he was doing it for Buffy of Faith’s benefit (or just because he hated conflict), but that backfired too when Buffy caught up with them a few minutes later - just in time to see Faith flirting with Scott.

 

Yeah, their dinner was not going to go well. Xander felt sorry for Joyce.

 

Later that night, when Buffy and Faith were probably out patrolling together (if Buffy hadn’t murdered Faith with a piece of cutlery), Xander sat down to reply to Tony’s last email.

 

_ ‘Hey Tony, _

 

_ Thanks for the advice (and thank Pepper for me too). It didn’t make any sense to me at first either, but then I asked Cordelia what she thought it meant and she explained it all too me. And not a moment too soon. Buffy’s been let back into school, apparently the School Board overruled Snyder’s decision, and so she’s around all the time now.  _

 

_ In other news, there’s a new girl in town. Her name is Faith and she’s...different from what I’m used to. Funnily enough Cordelia actually seems to like her, which seems strange to me, but who knows how girls’ brains work? _

 

_ One of the weird things about Faith is that she’s just come to town without any kind of adult supervision, which I suppose shouldn’t seem too strange - we are 17 - but it still seems weird. I have no idea where she’s even staying.’ _

 

Xander paused his typing with a frown. Was Faith seventeen? He’d just presumed she was their age, she certainly acted as though she was, but he had no idea. He didn’t even know how old Kendra had been either. Buffy had been super young when she had been called though. Was that normal? What if Faith was only fifteen like Buffy had been when she was called? 

 

And where was she staying? She hadn’t mentioned knowing anyone in Sunnydale, which meant that she was probably staying at some kind of motel - which was a bad plan for anyone, let alone a slayer. Not to mention that he had no idea how she would be paying for it. She didn’t strike Xander as the sort of person that came from money (there was a rough edge to her, the sort of edge that came from growing up poor), and she had admitted that she hadn’t come with her Watcher’s blessing.

 

Anyway, regardless of how she was paying for her accommodation, if she was fifteen then it was completely unacceptable for her to be staying alone at a motel. Though actually, she probably deserved better than a motel room regardless of how old she was - especially if she was going to stay for a while. 

 

The problem was that Xander had no idea what to do about it. She couldn’t stay with him, his parents would never allow it, and Cordelia and Willow’s parents wouldn’t be willing to let her stay either. Which really only left Buffy, but that was just a terrible idea, and Giles, which seemed indecent.

 

3-3-3

 

Xander couldn’t bring himself to pretend to be surprised at lunch the next day when Buffy ranted about her and Faith’s disastrous evening. Though, Buffy’s reaction did seem to be a little over the top. So Faith had been so focussed whaling on a vampire that she hadn’t been able to help Buffy out. Wasn’t that kind of understandable given that not one of her stories had involved having any kind of back up? It had taken Buffy a few months to get used to having Xander and Willow accompany her when she was patrolling.

 

Not to mention that Buffy had had her own ‘whaling on a bad guy’ moments - not the least being when she had smashed the Master’s skeleton into pieces. And, yeah, so the Master hadn’t been alive at the time, but Giles was always telling Buffy that she should finish her fights sooner instead of playing with her prey.

Still, there no point arguing with Buffy, and after having his first attempted defence of Faith sharply rebutted, Xander gave up and turned his attention to his lunch.

 

“She just kept hitting him!” Buffy exclaimed, not for the first time. “Over and over again. And during dinner, she ate fries off  _ my  _ plate,  _ and  _ straight out of the bowl. Not when Mom could see her, of course, but still, it completely ruined my appetite. It was like she hadn’t eaten or day or something. She just kept eating and eating, like she thought the food was going to disappear or something.”

 

“Maybe she hadn’t eaten all day.” Xander suggested, his musings from the day before in the front of his mind. “Does anyone know where she’s staying?”

 

“Don't be stupid, Xander.” Buffy snapped. “Of course she’d eaten. Why wouldn’t she have? She’s a slayer, we need food.”

 

“Everyone needs food, Buff.” Xander pointed out. “Some people just need it more than others. Did she tell you where she was staying?”

 

Buffy, Cordelia, and Willow were all shooting him suspicious looks. “Why?”

 

“Just wondering.” Xander shrugged. “Do we know how old she is?”

 

“She acts like she’s way older than us.” Willow commented.

 

“But she can’t be,” Buffy pointed out. “She’s only just been called. Isn’t there a cut off age? Giles!” She exclaimed as he made his way towards them. “Isn’t there a cut off age for being called as a slayer?”

 

“Er, yes,” Giles said, stopping beside the table. “Why do you ask?”

 

“We’re trying to figure out how old Faith is,” Buffy explained. “But she can’t be much older than me, can she?”

 

“No, in fact, I would be surprised if she was any older than you.” Giles answered. “How did your patrolling go?”

 

“Horribly!” Buffy said, standing up and picking up her books before walking away with Giles. “We were attacked by a gang of vamps, but Faith was too busy beating one of them into a pulp to help me with the other two…”

 

Xander tried not to feel too relieved that they weren’t going to have to hear the story again.

 

“So, what’s with all the questions about Faith?” Cordelia asked him, her tone still slightly suspicious.

 

“I’ve been thinking and, well, Kendra stayed with Buffy when she was in town, right?”

 

“Yeah, and?” Willow asked.

 

“Well, where’s Faith staying? She doesn’t seem to know anyone in town, and she’s not staying with one of us, so she’s probably staying in a motel.”

 

“So?” Cordelia raised an eyebrow.

 

“So how’s she paying for it?” Xander asked. “And what about vamps, they don’t need an invitation to enter motel rooms.”

 

“She’s seventeen.” Willow told him. “It’s not like she’s a kid.”

 

Xander sighed, why weren’t they getting this? “When Buffy was missing, I used to go through all these horrible scenarios of what could have happened to her. In one of them, she was sleeping in a motel room somewhere and a vampire would break in and kill her where she was sleeping.”

 

“Buffy’s fine.” Willow reassured him.

 

Xander rolled his eyes. “I know, but don’t you guys think we should be doing something to help Faith? We don’t even know if she’s seventeen. Buffy was fifteen when she was called.”

 

Cordelia’s expression looked almost concerned. “I’d invite her over to my house, but my parents would freak.”

 

“There is no way Mom would let her stay with me.” Willow agreed. “And it’s not like she can stay with Buffy, she almost got her killed!”

 

“No, she can’t stay with Buffy.” Xander agreed. “She can’t stay with me either. Dad would throw a fit.”

 

“She can stay with me.” Oz suggested. “My folks won’t mind.”

 

Willow spun towards him so fast she almost fell off her seat. “What? No, she can’t! You can’t have another girl staying at your house, especially not a girl like her. You…”

 

“It’s fine, Willow.” Oz soothed her. “She can stay in our spare room.”

 

“But,” Willow frowned. “Are you sure your parents won’t mind. She is kind of skanky.”

 

Cordelia sniffed. “Just because she’s not a puritan like you.”

 

Xander had to hide a smile at the proof that Cordelia really did like Faith. 

 

“Mom and Dad will be fine with it.” Oz promised. “They like meeting new people.”

 

“Thanks, man.” Xander told him sincerely. “I just really didn’t feel good about leaving her in a motel by herself. Not even if she is our age.”

 

“No worries.” Oz nodded.

 

“I guess it’s not like she’s going to be staying long anyway.” Willow conceded.

 

3-3-3

 

“Her Watcher’s dead?” Willow repeated in shock. “I thought she said that she was in England.”

 

“Yeah, well, she lied.” Buffy replied, but there did seem to be something more sympathetic in her expression than there had been before. “Her Watcher was killed by this super old vamp, like Master old, and Faith came here to get away from him.”

 

“And he chased her all the way here?” Xander asked in disbelief. “That’s, like, a two day drive.”

 

“Have you ever noticed how obsessive vampires seem to be?” Buffy asked. “It’s like they get an idea in their mind and then never give up until they’re dust.”

 

“But you killed him?” Willow double checked.

 

“Faith did.” Buffy said, her expression proud. “She really came through in the end.”

 

“Her Watcher being killed kind of explains why she got so intense with that vampire the night.” Xander said, imagining the mess that Buffy would be in if Giles was ever killed.

 

“Yeah,” Buffy agreed somberly. “Anyway, I’ve asked Giles if she can stay and he’s going to ask the council. It might be nice to have another slayer around.”

 

Willow’s eyes widened. “What? You mean she might be staying for good?” She turned towards Oz. “But..”

 

“Did you ask her how old she was?” Xander asked.

 

Buffy shrugged. “It didn’t come up. I did find out where she’s staying though. She’s got a room at the Motor Inn, the one by the highway.”

 

Xander grimaced. “That place is horrible.”

 

Oz leaned forward. “Do you know where she is right now?”

 

Buffy shrugged. “I dunno, sleeping maybe? That’s what I’d be doing if I didn’t have to be at school.”

 

Xander exchanged a look with Oz, before nodding. “We can go see her after school.”

 

Buffy looked between them. “What? Why?”

 

“We were talking yesterday about how she shouldn’t have to stay at the motel.” Xander explained. “So Oz is going to ask if she wants to stay in his parents’ spare room.”

 

Buffy looked upset. “Where was I when you decided this?”

 

“Talking to Giles, I think.” Xander answered.

 

“And you didn’t think I should get a say?” Buffy asked.

 

Xander frowned. “Over whether Oz invites her to stay with him? Uh, no, not really.”

 

“But, but…”

 

“It’s not like it’s official slaying business.” Cordelia pointed out.

 

“But she’s a slayer!” Buffy argued. 

 

“So?” Cordelia retorted. “It’s not like you let Giles make those sorts of decisions for you.”

 

“So she should stay with me!” Buffy answered. 

 

“Because that’s not a terrible idea at all!” Cordelia answered sarcastically.

 

“Hey, it’s not a terrible idea!” Willow jumped in. “It could work.”

 

Cordelia eyed her with disdain. “You just don’t want her staying with Oz.”

 

“Well, yeah,” Willow admitted. “That’s true. But Buffy had a point. Who better to understand Faith than Buffy? They’re both slayers!”

 

“Yeah, cos Buffy was so understanding yesterday.” Cordelia argued. “Buffy couldn’t be more different from Faith if she tried. Even I have more in common with Faith than she does.”

 

Willow mumbled something under her breath which sounded suspiciously like, ‘yeah, ‘cos Buffy’s not a skanky bitch.’

 

Cordelia stiffened and stood up. “Well, I have better things to do than to sit here with you lot.”

 

“I’ll come with you.” Xander said, glaring at Willow as he stood to his feet. 

 

3-3-3

 

Xander’s growing theory that Cordelia actually liked Faith, despite her denials, gained even more evidence when she insisted on joining the group in visiting Faith’s hotel room. Xander was glad for her presence, especially since Buffy and Willow had decided to come along as well.

 

Buffy had been to Faith’s room the night before so she led the way, before stopping so suddenly that Xander walked into her back.

 

“Oh, I’d forgotten about this. Kakistos found us here, before leading us to the warehouse he was staying in.”

 

Xander looked past the broken door and into the trashed motel room. “This is exactly why slayers shouldn’t stay in motel rooms.”

 

“She’s not here.” Willow pointed out unnecessarily. 

 

“Maybe she changed rooms.” Buffy suggested.

 

Xander looked up at the broken window in the back of the room. “Wouldn’t they just have kicked her out?”

 

“I think Kakistos killed the manager.” Buffy answered, turning around and looking towards the other doors. “Maybe whoever took over didn’t know that it was her room.”

 

“I think they have records for that kind of thing, Buff.” Xander told her. “But they might not have known that she was involved in the room trashing. I’ll go ask at the office.”

 

They found Faith in room 24 which, while in better shape than the trashed one, made Xander feel itchy just looking at it.

 

“Sup,” Faith greeted them, lounging against the door frame. “What’d I do to deserve a visit from the whole gang?”

 

Cordelia was eyeing the room in disdain. “People actually pay to stay in places like this?”

 

“Sometimes, but if I were you I’d be more concerned with those boots you’re wearing.” Faith told her. “I bet they cost ten times more than this place and they’re just as hideous.”

 

The corners of Cordelia’s mouth twitched. “At least they don’t have lice.”

 

“That you know about.” Faith smirked. “Besides, there’s no lice here - just cockroaches.”

 

Cordelia shuddered in horror.

 

“We’ve come to tell you that we’ve got you place to stay.” Buffy told Faith.

 

Faith bristled. “I don’t know whether you noticed, B, but I’ve already got a place to stay.”

 

Buffy looked at the room behind Faith in obvious disgust. “Yeah, but…”

 

“Vampires can get in without at invite.” Xander took over quickly. “That doesn’t strike me as a great place for a slayer to sleep.” He pointed in the direction of the trashed room. “Case, and point.”

 

Faith seemed to consider it. “And where exactly is this ‘place’.”

 

“With me.” Oz said.

 

Faith’s perusal of Oz’s body was decidedly predatory. “Kinky.”

 

“N-no!” Willow exclaimed. “No kinks allowed!”

 

“My parents have a spare room.” Oz explained.

 

Faith looked surprised. “And they won’t mind me crashing in it?”

 

Oz shrugged. “They like meeting new people.”

 

3-3-3

 

After they got a Faith settled in Oz’s spare room, Xander headed home for dinner (a few slices of cold pizza left over from the night before) and tried not to think too much about the confused and vulnerable expression he’d seen for a second on Faith’s face when she took in her new room. He knew how she felt. That had been how he had felt the first time Jesse’s parents had tucked him and Jesse into bed. He didn’t want to think about what his life might have been like without Jesse and Willow (and Jesse’s loving, functional family) around.

 

He opened up his laptop and grinned when he saw a new email from Tony. Somehow, despite how busy his life had to be, Tony always emailed him back within twenty four hours. It was unreal.

 

‘ _ Dear Xander, _

 

_ This Faith sounds interesting - different people always are the most fun (and often the easiest to annoy). Have you figured out where she’s staying yet? I’m having a bit of an adult moment (it’s really not a good look on me) and the idea of a seventeen year old girl staying alone...well, it isn’t great. Though, now that I say that, it seems awfully hypocritical of me. Your mom was seventeen when we had sex. (You probably didn’t want to know that, did you?)  _

 

_ Damn, I’m grossing out the younger generation and worrying about adult things - I really am getting old. _

 

_ Anyway, let me know if you want me to do anything to help this girl. I could buy her a house? No, that would probably be creepy. Would you like a house? I could buy you one. _

 

_ About Cordelia liking her, in my vast experience from having sex with women, the ones like your girlfriend and this girl Faith either really like each other, or really hate each other - there doesn’t seem to be any middle ground.  _

 

_ I’m going to a gala tonight. I haven’t been to one in months, but the invitations were really starting to pile up (and the tabloids are starting to claim that I’d accidently turned myself into some kind of cyborg - alright, that was only one of them) so I’m going. It should be fun, though I’ve promised Pepper that I’ll try not to end up on the front of US Weekly, so I probably won’t get up to anything too crazy. _

 

_ Also, I would like to remind you that my phone number is saved into your cellphone and that I am paying for unlimited minutes. You should ring me sometime. _

 

_ Tony’ _

 

3-3-3

 

Tony wasn’t sure how he felt about the fact that one of Xander’s best friends had been charged with the murder of one of his other friends. 

 

Well, that was a lie. 

 

He felt confused. What kind of police force charged a seventeen year old girl with murder because her principle hated her. Wasn’t there supposed to be more evidence involved in that sort of thing? And why hadn’t Xander mentioned it before? And why hadn’t JARVIS mentioned it when he was doing his overview on all things Xander Harris?

 

The answer to the last question didn’t lessen Tony’s confusion at all. How had the murder of a teenaged girl, and the subsequent arrest of her friend, not made the Sunnydale news? The answer, because she was just one of ten people that were murdered that week alone. 

 

That was...horrifying. 

 

The national homicide rate was eighteen murders for every 100,000 people. Sunnydale had a population of 38,552, which meant that they should have less than seven homicides every year. Not over five hundred! And, worst still, the death rate didn’t seem to have changed much in over a hundred years. Almost one percent of Sunnydale’s population had been being murdered every year for over a century and people kept moving there. Were they insane? Did they not know how to google search?

 

And most importantly, why the hell was his son living there? According to the odds, Xander was lucky to be alive and the obituary in his school’s newspaper agreed. 

 

Which left Tony with three questions:

 

  1. Why were over five hundred people in Sunnydale being murdered every year?
  2. Why wasn’t anyone doing anything about it?
  3. What was the quickest way to get Xander out?



 

Except, Xander obviously didn’t want to leave. Tony had offered to sue for custody of him and Xander had refused. Could Tony forcibly remove him? It probably wouldn’t go over well in court and Tony could only imagine the headlines.

 

But how could he let his son live somewhere that dangerous? Wasn’t it his job to be the adult and make sure he was safe? 

 

Well, first things first, Tony needed to figure out what was going on in Sunnydale and, as much as he hated to say it, the internet wasn’t going to help. Maybe he could ask Xander - surely the people who lived in Sunnydale had some kind of idea of what was killing so many of them?

 

So he needed to...

 

“Sir?” JARVIS’ voice broke through his thoughts. “Mister Russell is on the line for you.”

 

Tony groaned, he hated it when the SI Board Members rang him. “What does he want?”

 

“He did not say, sir.”

 

“Alright, put him through to my phone.” Tony instructed, fishing it out of his pocket. “Yeah?”

 

Damien Russell was definitely a talker, but after having assured the man that the research and development of their new range of medical equipment was on track (or at least not too far behind schedule), Tony finally managed to get off the phone. It was times like this that he missed Obie. The man might have betrayed him and tried to have him killed, but he’d done a great job at keeping the SI board off Tony’s back.

 

Slipping his phone back into his pocket, Tony looked back at the holograms in front of him. What had he been working on again?

 

Oh, that was right, he’d been about to go down to his workshop and work on the medical imaging machine.

 

“Close it all down, JARVIS.” Tony instructed, standing up and stretching.

 

“Yes, sir.” JARVIS answered as the hologram disappeared. “What do you wish me to do with the information you have uncovered regarding Sunnydale?”

 

Tony frowned. What information about Sunnydale? Oh, that was right, he’d been looking through Xander’s school newspaper to see if there was anything of interest going on.

 

“Keep it.” Tony decided. “I’ll finish reading it later.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, thank you so much for all your wonderful reviews. They are so encouraging! My aim for posting this story was to reply to each review, but unfortunately I'm not going to be able to do that since I've decided to take a step back from all things fanfiction related. Don't worry, since this story is already written, I will continue posting it weekly until all the chapters are up. I hope you enjoyed this chapter :)


	5. RevelatION

_ ‘Also, I would like to remind you that my phone number is saved into your cellphone and that I am paying for unlimited minutes. You should ring me sometime.’ _

 

Xander glanced nervously at the cellphone that was lying on the bed beside him, before turning his attention back to the last few lines of the email that Tony had sent him two days ago.

 

If he took the email at face value then it read as though Tony wanted Xander to call him, but the idea that an adult would want to talk to him was a bit too weird to be believed. 

 

The problem was that, despite how many times Xander had read those two sentences, there didn’t seem to be any hidden meaning to the words. So, chances were, Tony really did want to talk to him.

 

But what if Xander rang him and said something wrong? What if he started babbling, and his words got away from him, and he made himself look like an idiot? Then Tony would realise how stupid and embarrassing Xander was and cut off all contact.

 

Still, despite his fears, Xander couldn’t not ring Tony after that email because then Tony might think that Xander was avoiding him and didn’t want to talk to him. 

 

Life had been so much easier when he hadn’t known that Tony Stark was his father. 

 

Xander picked up the phone and searched through his contacts for Tony’s name, before starting the call.

 

The phone rang three times, before a man with an English accent answered it. “Good afternoon, Master Alexander. Mister Stark is currently unavailable, however, he wishes me to inform you that he will return your call in exactly five minutes.”

 

“Uh, hi,” Xander responded nervously. “And thanks.”

 

“It is my pleasure, Mister Alexander.” The man told him. “Have a good day.”

 

“Thanks,” Xander said again. “You too.”

 

Xander pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at it. Who had that been? Did Tony have a butler? An English butler? That was just too weird!

 

Though no weirder than him having a chauffeur, private assistant, and an entire team of bodyguards - even if Tony only used the full team of bodyguards for special occasions. 

 

It was like a completely different world. The only person Xander knew who had anything like that was Cordelia, and her family only had a maid and a cook. Which, while bizarre for a place like Sunnydale, wasn’t the same thing as having an English butler. 

 

The only American that Xander had ever heard of having an English butler was Bruce Wayne, and he wasn’t even real. Though, now that Xander thought about it, Tony had a lot in common with Batman.

 

Both of them were billionaires, both of them were superheros, both of them used advanced technology to fight the bad guys, both of them had English butlers.

 

And hadn’t Bruce Wayne discovered that he had a son late in life too? Xander wondered how Damian Wayne had dealt with the transition between normal person and son of billionaire superhero. But then Damian had never really been a normal person, he’d been brought up by Ra’s al Ghul who had been rich too. At least Xander hadn’t been brought up by Tony’s enemy. 

 

Did Tony even have enemies? Well, there were the people who had kept him prisoner in Afghanistan, and the people whose weapons Tony kept flying over to Afghanistan to destroy, or were they the same group?

 

Either way, Xander was glad he hadn’t grown up with them. He didn’t think he would get along well with terrorists. Not to mention that they probably didn’t even have electricity.

 

Though, if he’d been brought up like Damian Wayne he would at least have some useful skills to help Buffy. Damian had not only been a martial arts expert, but he’d also used a katana sword. All Xander had was an ability to distract the vampires by falling over headstones. Maybe he should try and learn some new skills? 

 

Nah, there wasn’t really any point. Especially since now that Faith was in town, she’d probably be the one to accompany Buffy on her patrol every night. Besides, who would teach him? He knew that Buffy and Giles wouldn’t. (He’d suggested it to them a few days after Jesse had died, but they had both refused. Well, Giles had refused, Buffy had just laughed.)

 

Though, Buffy wasn’t the only Slayer in town anymore. Maybe Faith would be willing to give him a few pointers. Unless she laughed in his face too. 

 

He could always sign up for some lessons at the Martial Arts Academy on Boston St, except lessons cost money and money wasn’t something Xander had. Tony had money, but he’d already given Xander a laptop, a phone and access to the internet, and Xander didn’t want to ask him for anything else.

 

Though, now that he thought about it…

 

Xander pulled his laptop towards him and brought up google before typing ‘learning martial arts’. He grinned when the first result was a video entitled, ‘Learn Martial Arts Online’. Sure it wouldn’t be as good as actually being taught by someone, but it would be better than nothing, right?

 

He clicked on the link, before flinching in surprise when his phone started vibrating against his leg. Picking up the phone, Xander eyed it nervously before answering it.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Xander, thanks for calling.” Tony’s greeted him cheerfully. “How are you?”

 

“No problem.” Xander answered automatically. “Sorry for, uh, ringing at a bad time.”

 

“No, don’t apologise. Your timing was impeccable. I’m always glad for an excuse to get out of Board Meetings. It’s like being in class, only worse.”

 

Xander winced, he’d pulled Tony Stark out of a Board Meeting? “Sorry. I, uh, I could ring back later?”

 

“Don’t worry about it.” Tony told him. “I’d much rather talk to you than to them anyway. What’s been going on?”

 

Xander’s brain froze. What? Had Tony Stark just said that he prefered talking to him than to the members of the Stark Industries’ Board? Because that was just…

 

“Nothing much.” Xander answered quickly, pushing his brainshock to the back of his mind. He’d deal with that later. “Uh, you know that girl I emailed you about?”

 

“Which girl?” Tony sounded amused. “Because I’ve got to tell you, there are a lot of girls in your life. You have more girls in your life than I do, and I’m Tony Stark. What’s your secret?”

 

“No secret.” Xander assured him quickly. “And they’re not in my life like that, they’re just friends. Except for Cordelia. She’s in my life like that, or at least, I hope she will be.”

 

“Ah, so that’s your secret.” Tony commented. “You’re playing the long game. I would try it, except I really don’t think I have the patience.”

 

“You probably don’t need to anyway.” Xander pointed out. “Didn’t you go home with that model last week?”

 

“Uh oh, someone’s been reading the tabloids. Which, I’ve got to tell you, is not the best source of information, well, at least, not the best source of true information.”

 

“So you didn’t go home with her?” Xander asked, before instantly regretting the question. “Sorry, don’t answer that. It’s none of…”

 

“Well, I did leave the gala with her.” Tony interrupted him. “But then I just dropped her home. She’s a, well I don’t want to say friend, but she’s a person that I’m friendly with.”

 

“Oh.” Xander responded, unsure what to say about that.

 

“Anyway, you were telling me about one of your many girls.” Tony reminded him.

 

Xander nodded. “Right, uh, Faith.”

 

“Ah, the new girl in town.”

 

“Yeah, she’s going to be sticking around for a while, so Oz’s parents are letting her stay with them.”

 

“Oz being the one who’s repeating Senior year.” Tony said proudly. “And who is dating Willow, who doesn’t know what to think about the fact that her boyfriend is repeating. And Pepper tells me I never listen.”

 

“Willow’s actually gotten over it now.” Xander told him. “But, yeah.”

 

“So I don’t need to buy her a house?” Tony asked. “Would you like a house? I could buy you one if you want. You’re almost eighteen, you could move out of home.”

 

Xander had no idea what to say. “I thought you were joking about that.”

 

“I never joke about money.” Tony told him. “Well, I do, but I never joke about buying people things. Just ask Pepper about her shoe collection.”

 

“Uh, well, thanks, but I think I’m fine.” Xander told him. “People would ask questions.”

 

“Good point.” Tony said, though he sounded a little disappointed.

 

“By the way, do you have an English butler?” Xander asked him.

 

“What? Oh, you mean JARVIS?” Tony sounded amused.

 

“Your AI?” Xander asked. “That was an AI? But he sounded so real.”

 

“JARVIS is real.” Tony told him. “He just happens to be a bit different from your average person.”

 

“Right, sorry.” Xander said quickly. “I didn’t mean to be, uh, speciesist? Robotist? But why does he sound English? Is he like the Alfred to your Batman?”

 

Tony laughed. “My parents had an English butler named Jarvis when I was a kid. I kind of modelled JARVIS after him.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Anyway,” Tony said. “If you don’t want a house, is there anything else you’d like? I feel like I should be forking out for a red ferrari or something.”

 

Xander almost choked, how was this his life? “Uh, no thank you.”

 

“Is that a no to the ferrari, no there is nothing that you want?” Tony asked. “Because I’ve got to tell you, if it’s the second one - I don’t believe you. In fact, I don’t believe you either way. Every man wants a red ferrari.”

 

“Well, I want one,” Xander admitted. “Who wouldn’t? But not even Cordelia’s dad drives a car that flash and…”

 

“And it might draw attention.” Tony finished for him. “I’ve got to say, I have no idea where you got this subtleness from. It certainly didn’t come from me. What about another kind of car? Like a 1957 Chevrolet Bel Aire? I have one of those sitting in my garage. No, it’s more of a grandpa car, you need something cool. Like a convertible. Are there old cars in Sunnydale? You could say an uncle died and left it to you.”

 

“I think my uncle has a 1957 Chevrolet Bel Aire convertible.” Xander admitted. “But…”

 

“So not that car then.” Tony decided. “And not that uncle. What about a 1973 Buick Centurion Convertible? Or a 1961 Plymouth Fury Convertible?”

 

“I have no idea what they look like.” Xander admitted.

 

“JARVIS, send Xander a few links, will you?” Tony said.

 

Xander pulled his laptop closer and brought up his email, before blinking his surprise when there was already an email there. “JARVIS works quickly.”

 

“What I wouldn’t give for that processing power.” Tony agreed. “What do you think of them?”

 

Xander opened the links that JARVIS had attached to the email. “They look really expensive!”

 

“Meh,” Tony responded. “A ferrari would be expensive. These will just have to do until you let me buy you one of those. Do you like either of them?”

 

Xander looked at the two different cars in interest. “I’m not so sure that this is a good idea. What 

about my parents? They’ll know that none of my uncles have died.”

 

“I’ll talk to them.” Tony said. “Or rather, I’ll have one of my lawyers talk to them.”

 

Xander looked towards his door worriedly. “But…”

 

“Unless you’d rather I didn’t, of course.”

 

“No, it’s alright.” Xander decided eventually. “It’ll probably be easier if they know anyway.”

 

“Great, I’ll set it up.” Tony decided. “So, what car would you like? You don’t have to pick either of those. There are plenty of other options. Also, what colour would you like it to be?”

 

Xander looked between the cars again. “Uh, I think I like the Buick.”

 

“Excellent. JARVIS, make a note of it.” Tony commented. “And the colour?”

 

“I like the blue of the other one.” Xander decided.

 

“Then it’s decided.” Tony’s grin was audible. “I’ll get it sorted out. Now, what else would you like? A X-box? A tv for your room?”

 

“You don’t have to buy me anything.” Xander protested. “You’re already buying me a car!”

 

“Buying things is fun!” Tony exclaimed. “What else would I do with all my money? There must be something else you would like!”

 

Xander was about to deny wanting anything when the internet tab that had the martial arts video caught his eye. He hadn’t wanted to ask, but Tony was offering, and it was for a good cause.

 

“Uh, well, if you’re sure,” Xander started unsurely.

 

“Oooh, so there is something.” Tony sounded excited. “An X-box?”

 

“Martial Arts lessons.” Xander corrected. “But you don’t have to and…”

 

“Martial Arts lessons work too.” Tony interrupted him. “Anywhere in particular?”

 

“There’s a Martial Arts Academy in Sunnydale.” Xander answered. “But anywhere would be fine.”

 

“Any any specific kind?” Tony questioned.

 

“I don’t know.” Xander admitted. “Just something that would make me more useful.”

 

“Useful?”

 

Xander froze. “Uh, I mean something that I could use to defend myself if I ever needed to.”

 

There was a long pause. “Is there anyone in particularly you’re worried about? Because…”

 

“No, no,” Xander shook his head. “No one in particularly, just, you know, in case.”

 

4-4-4

 

“So, Faith, what are Oz’s family’s deepest, darkest secrets?” Xander asked the next day, as they watched Oz’s band play at the Bronze. “Any skeletons in their closet that we should know about?”

 

Faith opened her mouth to answer, but was beaten to it by Willow.

 

“Don’t you think that if Oz had any secrets, I would know them?” Willow asked. “I am his girlfriend.”

 

“Sure,” Xander nodded pleasantly. “But then, I don’t know all of Cordy’s secrets and we’ve been dating longer than you and Oz.”

 

Willow pulled a face. “Making out in cleaning cupboards isn’t dating, Xander.”

 

“I don’t know,” Faith said with a grin. “Sounds exactly like my kind of dating.”

 

Willow ignored her. “Besides, it’s not like your and Cordelia’s relationship is, well, is…”

 

Cordelia leant against Xander’s side. “Is what? Just because we aren’t naming our future puppies like you and Mr. Werewolf.”

 

“There’s nothing wrong with planning for the future!” Willow protested, though a blush was creeping up her cheeks. 

 

“Nothing wrong with living in the present either.” Faith put in, standing up and stretching. “Speaking of which, I’m going to go score a dance with hotstuff over there.”

 

Xander looked in the direction that she was pointing. “What kind of person wears a suit to the Bronze?”

 

Faith smirked. “Oh, he won’t be wearing it for long.”

 

“She’s just so...skanky.” Willow complained as they watched Faith practically rub her body against the guy’s side. “And why did she pick that guy, anyway? It’s not like he’s even that good looking.”

 

“I think she picked him for his nocturnal habits.” Xander commented, turning his attention back to Oz’s band.

 

“Oh,” Willow frowned. “You think he’s a vampire?”

 

“He’s wearing a suit to the Bronze.” Cordelia grimaced. “Either he’s dead, or his fashion sense is.”

 

“So why is she dancing with him?” Willow asked disapprovingly. “Buffy never dances with vampires.”

 

“Well, unless their name is Angel.” Xander quipped, before wincing when Willow speared him with a glare. “Which she doesn’t anymore, because Angel is dead, and we’re all really sad about it. Where is Buffy anyway? I thought she went to get a drink?”

 

“She did, but then she found Scott.” Willow said with a smile, gesturing towards the dance floor where Buffy was dancing with her new guy. “I like him.”

 

“Of course you do.” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “You’re the one who set them up.”

 

Willow’s smile was almost smug. “They go well together, don’t you think?” 

 

“I’m withholding judgement.” Xander told her. “The biggest test is yet to come.”

 

“What test?” Willow asked.

 

“How he deals with the whole ‘Buffy is the slayer’ thing.” Xander reminded her. “She’s going to have to tell him at some point and then we’ll see.”

 

“He’ll be fine.” Willow said confidently. “Who wouldn’t want to date a superhero?”

 

“I wouldn’t!” Cordelia declared. 

 

Willow snorted as she glanced at where Xander was holding Cordelia’s hand on the table. “Obviously.”

 

“Hey!” Xander protested, though without much heat. 

 

“You know the problem with some guys?” Faith asked, slipping back onto her seat. “No stamina. 

You’re just getting going, just starting to enjoy yourself, and then they’re dust. What are you lot talking about?”

 

“Dating superheroes.” Xander said with a grin. “Would you and why?”

 

“Dating as in making out in a cleaning closet?” Faith asked with a grin. “Hell yeah. Dating as in holding their hand and eating ice cream with them? Hell no. Though, to be fair, the second one isn’t just about superheroes. I hate holding hands.”

 

“Ex with sweaty hands?” Cordelia asked sympathetically.

 

“Nah,” Faith shook her head. “I just don’t like to be weighed down, you know.”

 

“I think it’s nice.” Willow commented with a smile. 

 

“So,” Xander started, after the pause got awkward. “You never did answer my question, what secrets do the Oz’s have?”

 

Faith shrugged casually. “Nothing that I can tell. Well, aside from the weed they’ve got hidden in their ceiling.”

 

“What?!” Willow exclaimed in horror. “No, they wouldn’t! They couldn’t!”

 

“Okay,” Faith grinned lazily. “So I haven’t found any weed, but I wouldn’t be surprised to find some. I bet they went to Woodstock. They’re cool though. Did you know that they’re all up with vampires and werewolves? I almost fell out of my chair when they asked me about being the slayer.”

 

Xander blinked in surprise. “Well, I suppose their son is a werewolf, and didn’t he get bitten by his cousin?”

 

“Yeah, Jordy.” Willow nodded. “He’s so cute!”

 

“So if his parents know, how come we get put on Oz sitting duty?” Xander asked. “Shouldn’t that be their job or something?”

 

“They don’t have a cage at their house.” Willow explained. “Besides, I like doing it. It’s peaceful. I think I’m going to start reading him The Call of the Wild tomorrow night.”

 

“But that’s about a dog.” Xander pointed out. “You could at least find him a book written about a wolf. Or even a werewolf. What about Twilight? You never know, wolf-Oz might enjoying hearing about other wolf-men.”

 

“Or it might be all the motivation he needs to break out of his cage and rip you to pieces.” Faith commented. “That’s what I’d do if someone started reading that trash to me.”

 

Xander grinned in amusement. “By the way Faith, how old are you?”

 

Faith stiffened and eyed him suspiciously. “Why?”

 

“I’ve just been wondering.” Xander commented. “I was telling, uh, my father about you and I realised that I have no idea how old you are.”

 

Faith leaned forward sensually, her cleavage on full display. “How old do you think I am?”

 

Xander focused his attention on the wall behind Faith’s left shoulder. “Well, Buffy was called when she was fifteen, but you act more like you’re more like our age, so somewhere between fifteen and eighteen.”

 

“Huh,” Faith leaned back, looking almost impressed. “I’m sixteen.”

 

Xander blinked. “Really?”

 

“But you act way older than that!” Willow protested.

 

“Yeah, well, some people grow up faster than other people.” Faith told her acerbically.

 

“You know the age of consent in California is eighteen, right?” Cordelia asked her.

 

Xander winced at his girlfriend’s bluntness.

 

“What? Really?” Faith asked in disbelief. “That’s such bull!”

 

“Not really.” Willow put in. “Studies have shown that…”

 

Faith shut her up with a wave of her hand. “Save it, goodygood. So you’re saying that it’s illegal for me to get laid here? No wonder this place is named Sunnyhell.”

 

“It’s not actually.” Willow corrected. “It’s called Sunnydale.”

 

“Has anyone told Buffy about this?” Faith asked, looking at where Buffy and Scott were still dancing. “Didn’t she do the shimmy with Angel?”

 

“Yeah, and look how well that went.” Cordelia pointed out.

 

“So, sixteen, huh,” Xander said quickly, as Willow bristled and opened her mouth. “I, uh, hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you have to stay in school till you’re eighteen here too.”

 

“Are you freaking kidding me?!” Faith asked with a scowl. “No way in hell am I going back to school! There’s no point anyway. I’m the slayer.”

 

Xander shrugged. “Just thought you should know. Try not to get arrested.”

 

4-4-4

 

“Willow’s glaring at you.”

 

Xander sighed, but didn’t move from where he was lying on the grass beside Cordelia. “I’m sure.”

 

“What did you do?” Cordelia asked curiously, her hand playing with his hair. “Did you make another werewolf joke?”

 

“No.”

 

“Is she still mad that Faith is living at Oz’s house?”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

“Then what?” Cordelia asked. 

 

“I went to sleep while I was watching Oz last night.” Xander explained, shifting his head away from her hand.

 

“So?” Cordelia asked. “It’s not like he could have gotten out of his cage without waking you up.”

 

“Except, he did.” Xander sighed. “He was there in the morning, but Jeff Orkin was found mauled in the woods.”

 

“And what? Oz somehow managed to break down the door, run to the woods, kill someone, come back, and fix the door while you were sleeping?” Cordelia asked archly.

 

“The window was open.”

 

“You mean that really little one near the ceiling?” Cordelia frowned, her hand returning to his hair. “So he somehow managed to jump up, out of the window, and then back, all without waking you up? Besides, how is it  your fault that they left the window open?”

 

“I shouldn’t have fallen asleep.”

 

Cordelia snorted. “Of course you should have. You have a test today.”

 

“Yeah, that’s why Willow wasn’t watching him.” Xander admitted. “I only remembered after I agreed to watch him.”

 

Cordelia glared towards where Willow and Oz were sitting. “So Willow asked you to watch Oz so she could get some sleep to take a test that she knew you were taking too?”

 

“She probably forgot.” Xander defended.

 

“Right.” Cordelia snorted. “And now they’re mad at you because they left the window open and there’s a tiny, little chance that Oz managed to escape, kill someone, and get back into his cage?”

 

“Well, when you put it like that.” Xander grinned, feeling better already. 

 

“Why are they so sure it was Oz anyway?” Cordelia asked. “Are there, like, werewolf hairs on his body that match to Oz’s or something?”

 

“No,” Xander shook his head. “Giles just read about it in the newspaper and came up with the theory.”

 

“Wow, super sleuth Giles is not!” Cordelia commented. “Oz didn’t fall for his idiocy, did he?”

 

“I think Oz was too busy freaking out about the fact that he’d maybe killed someone to think logically.” Xander commented.

 

“And what was your excuse?”

 

“I was too busy freaking out about the fact that I was maybe the reason that Oz had killed someone.” Xander admitted. “Besides, it’s Giles. When he says information, we believe the information.”

 

“Yeah, cos Giles is always right.” Cordelia said sarcastically. “Like when he thought those killing spirits were Miss Calendar trying to communicate with him.”

 

“Everyone has off days.” Xander reminded.

 

“Why do you always defend them?!” Cordelia complained.

 

“That’s what friends do.”

 

“Yeah, like Willow and Oz defended you when Giles accused you of being the reason that someone was dead.”

 

4-4-4

 

“Xander?”

 

Xander winced as the shut the front door behind him. Damn, he’d been hoping to sneak in without detection. He was only supposed to be popping home for fifteen minutes to get a jacket and maybe a bite to eat, so he could meet Cordelia and Willow at seven to check out Jeff’s body at the funeral home.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Get in here!” His dad growled.

 

Xander sighed and set his bag down beside the front door, before making his way into the lounge where both his parents were waiting for him. “What?”

 

“Don’t you take that tone with me.” His dad snapped. “Sit down.”

 

Xander glanced wistfully towards the door, before dropping down on the nearest chair. “Will this take long? I’m supposed to be meeting Cordelia and Willow soon.”

 

His dad snorted. “Think you’re too fancy to spend time with your family, huh?”

 

“Uh, no?” Xander looked between his parents in confusion. “What’s going on?”

 

“Don’t pretend like you don’t know.” His dad spat, his expression twisted into a snarl.

 

Xander searched his mind for an explanation. “Oh, is this about…” He trailed off, not wanting to mention Tony in case he was wrong.

 

“This is about the fact that your fricken father thought he could fricken threaten us!” His dad exploded, crushing the beer can in his fist.

 

“Tony!” His mum pleaded, placing her hand on her husband’s arm. “Don’t!”

 

“Tony threatened you?” Xander asked in surprise, his voice embarrassingly high pitched.

 

His mum glanced towards his dad in concern. “Not exactly.”

 

His dad shook her hand off his mum. “Well, what would you call it then? Not that he got off his ass and did himself. No, he’s too much of a pussy for that. He sent a fricken goon!”

 

Xander’s leg was bouncing nervously. “What did he say?”

 

“Here.” His mum thrust a piece of paper at him.

 

Xander skimmed through the paper quickly. The language was pretty fancy, but basically it seemed to say that if his parents didn’t hurt him, didn’t interfere with his life, and didn’t tell anyone that Tony Stark was his father, they would get an extra fifty thousand dollars.

 

He looked back up at his parents hopefully. “Did you sign it?”

 

“Why?” His dad snarled. “Worried you won’t get your fricken car after all?”

 

“Not really.” Xander answered honestly. “I just don’t want everyone to know about Tony.”

 

His dad snorted. “Yeah, right. You always did think you were better than us, you little prick!”

 

Xander sighed. “No, Dad, I didn’t.”

 

“Don’t call me ‘dad’. I’m not your fricken father!” 

 

“Tony!” His mum protested. 

 

“No, you’re not.” Xander agreed. “You could have been though. If you’d cared.”

 

His dad scoffed. “Like I could have ever given a flying frick about a little bastard like you.”

 

Xander handed the paper back to his mum. “Did you sign it?”

 

“Yes.” His mum admitted, before leaning towards him.

 

“Okay, good.” Xander sighed in relief. “Can I go now?”

 

“Why didn’t you tell us?” His mum asked suddenly.

 

Xander sunk back into his chair. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

 

“Mister Stane told us not to.” His mum explained, glancing at his dad. “Besides, your father thought that…”

 

“I’m not that bastard’s father, Jess, and if you hadn’t been so quick to spread your fricken legs you wouldn’t be stuck with him either.” His dad growled, before picking up the remote and switching the tv on. “Now get out or shut up, the football’s about to start.”

 

4-4-4

 

“Xander, hey! Did you hear the good news?”

 

“I think so.” Xander replied, propping his phone against his ear as he leant against the wall beside the entrance to the Sunnydale Funeral Home. Cordelia and Willow were due to arrive in about five minutes. “Though, it wasn’t exactly presented to me as good news.”

 

“Your parents didn’t give you any trouble, did they?” Tony sounded concerned. “Because…”

 

“No, not really.” Xander grinned as a warm feeling spread through him. “Dad, or, uh, Tony, did call you a pretty nasty name though.”

 

“He can join the club.” Tony didn’t sound impressed. “Just so long as he wasn’t calling you any names.”

 

Xander winced. “Well, he didn’t call me anything I’m not used to. Besides,” He added with a forced grin. “Technically I am a bastard. So Dad, or, uh, Tony, isn’t wrong. Damn, this is going to get confusing.”

 

“Clearly your mum has a thing for men named Tony.” Tony pointed out, his amusement audible. “But, before we get sidetracked, your attempt at which was very well done by the way, I want to to revisit the house idea.”

 

Xander grinned. “You can’t buy me a house.”

 

“So you’ve said.” Tony admitted. “But, I’ve got to say, I’m not convinced, and I’ve actually already bought you one.”

 

“What?!” Xander’s mouth dropped open.

 

“Because, honestly, as bad a look as adulting is on me,” Tony rushed to explain. “Even I know that you’re not supposed to let your son live with the guy who broke his arms when he was a kid.” 

 

Xander’s breathing hitched. “What? How do you...I mean, uh, it’s fine, really!”

 

“Right.” Tony didn’t sound even slightly convinced. “Anyway, you’re going to be eighteen in a few months, so I’m not going to try and force you to move out. I’m just going to tell you that I bought you a house on Crawford street a few weeks ago and, while it definitely needed some renovating, the workmen finished with it five days ago.”

 

Xander froze, surely Tony hadn’t bought him the mansion that Angel, Spike and Drusilla had tried to end the world in. “What?”

 

“I was sort of hoping that I would be able to break it to you naturally.” Tony admitted. “You would say, ‘yes, Tony, I’d love a house’ and I would say, ‘surprise!’, but apparently you’re too stubborn for that plan to have worked.”

 

“When you say the house on Crawford street.” Xander started. “You don’t mean the really big mansion, right?”

 

“Would you call it a big mansion? Sure it’s big for a house, but for a mansion?”

 

“Oh.” Xander really wasn’t sure how to respond to this. “Uh, why?”

 

“Because even my mansion is bigger than it.” Tony answered. “And…”

 

“No,” Xander interrupted. “Why did you buy me a mansion?!”

 

“I’m Tony Stark.” Tony explained. “But there actually was a good reason. See, I made sure that they didn’t do up the outside, or the first storey, so if anyone sees you going in they’ll just think you’re trespassing in an abandoned building.”

 

“Except for the workmen who fixed it up.” Xander pointed out. “And their kids, and their kids’ friends, and…”

 

“Ah, but I thought of that.” Tony announced proudly. “I hired some guys from LA to fix the place up. And they furnished it too. So anytime you want to crash there, it’s all set up for you. Also, I’ve set up a bank account in your name and will be bringing your card up with your new car when it’s ready.”

 

“I…” Xander had no idea what to say. “You don’t need to…”

 

“I know.” Tony assured him. “But I want to. Pepper’s very proud of me. She says I’m growing as a person.”

 

“You have a very strange relationship with your staff.” Xander commented, more because he had no idea what else to say. “Cordelia’s parents’ servants would never say anything like that to them. Wait, did you say that you were bringing the car up yourself?”

 

“Yeah, I’ll drive it down and then Happy will drive me back.” Tony explained.

 

“That’s, uh, not a good idea.” Xander told him quickly. “What if someone recognises you.” Or vampires decided to eat him?

 

“Don’t worry about it.” Tony said. “I’m great with disguises.”

 

Xander opened his mouth to argue, before hearing the sound of Willow and Cordelia bickering as they approached. “I’ve got to go.”

 

“No really, I am.” Tony protested.

 

“I’m meeting Willow and Cordy and they’ve just arrived.” Xander explained quickly. “I’ll, uh, talk to you later.”

 

“Sure.” Tony agreed. “And you should definitely go check out your new house. Have a good night.”

 

“You too.” Xander responded, before ending the call and slipping the cellphone into his pocket. 

“Evening, ladies.”

 

Cordelia leaned in for a kiss. “Hi.”

 

Willow made a disgusted noise. “Do you have to do that here?”

 

“What’s the problem, Wils?” Xander asked, wrapping his arm around Cordelia. “It’s not like you and Oz don’t get with the smoochies when we’re around.”

 

“We’re outside a funeral home.” Willow pointed out. “Don’t you have any respect for the dead?”

 

Cordelia snorted. “Yeah, like you and Oz didn’t get to second base behind that mausoleum last week.”

 

Willows blush could be seen despite the lack of light. “No we didn’t!”

 

“You got to second base against someone’s grave?” Xander asked in disbelief. “How is Cordy and I getting to first base outside a funeral home any worse?”

 

Willow raised her chin. “I’m going inside to find the body.”

 

“We’ll be along in a minute.” Xander promised her, catching Cordelia’s hand in his.

 

Willow grimaced. “You’re not going to make out, are you? We’re supposed to be exonerating Oz.”

 

“Firstly, you’re the one who thinks Oz is guilty, not us.” Cordelia told her. “And secondly, run along little miss mausoleum defiler.”

 

Willow scowled at her, before turning on her heel and making her way into the building.

 

Xander watched her leave, before being distracted when Cordelia leaned in and kissed him again. Xander reciprocated for a while, before remembering why he’d told Willow they’d catch up.

 

“Tony bought me a house.” He blurted out, pulling his lips away from hers.

 

“What?”

 

“That’s what I said!” Xander exclaimed. “And he didn’t just buy me any house. He bought me Angel’s mansion. Apparently he’s had it renovated and everything.”

 

“Why can’t Daddy be like that?” Cordelia complained. “He wouldn’t even take me to Spain over the summer.”

 

“He wants me to move out of home.” Xander continued. “He doesn’t like my parents and…”

 

“Xander, nobody likes your parents.” 

 

“I feel as though I ought to feel offended by that.” Xander commented. “But I’m not.”

 

“So, when are you moving?” Cordelia asked. “Because, I’ve got say, it would be great to have somewhere that we could hang out that isn’t my house, and doesn’t have Willow and Buffy hanging around.”

 

“I told him I didn’t want a house.”

 

Cordelia glared at him through narrowed eyes. “Don’t be an idiot. Of course you want a house!”

 

Xander tilted his head in acknowledgement. “I don’t want people to ask questions about why I’m living in the Crawford Street mansion.”

 

“No one has to know.” Cordelia told him. “It’s not like anyone’s going to be following you home.”

 

“Point.” Xander agreed. “But it’s the Crawford Street mansion. What if Buffy goes back to remember Angel or something and finds me there?”

 

“Well, you were going to tell her and Willow at some point, right?” Cordelia reminded him. “This way you’d just be telling them sooner rather than later.”

 

4-4-4

 

School the next day was pretty uneventful, too uneventful given the fact that they were supposed to investigating the death of Jeff. Still, Buffy and Willow clearly didn’t need Xander and Cordelia around, so they decided to take the afternoon off Scooby business and check out Xander’s new mansion.

 

True to Tony’s word, it looked exactly the same on the outside and on the inside there was…

 

A vampire that was supposed to be dead chained to the wall.

 

“Angel?” Cordelia exclaimed, stepping backwards. “Xander, what the hell is Angel doing chained the wall of your house?”

 

“Good question.” Xander acknowledged. “Other related questions could be, isn’t Angel supposed to be in hell? And why is he growling at us like he’s a dog?”

 

“And who chained him to the wall?” Cordelia added.

 

“I feel as though that one’s sort of self-explanatory.” Xander pointed out. “Who do we know who is both strong enough to chain him up, and cares enough not to just stake him?”

 

“You think Buffy did this?” Cordelia asked, flinching backwards as Angel lunged towards them. “Wouldn’t she have just knitted him a sweater and made him tea?”

 

“Yeah, because Buffy has often been known to behave like an English housewife.” Xander rolled his eyes. “Besides, who else could have done this?”

 

Cordelia peered at where Angel was still growling at them. “How long do you think he’s been here?”

 

“Not long.” Xander decided. “Tony said the workmen only finished a few days ago and they definitely would have noticed a guy chained to the wall.”

 

“Wait,” Cordelia turned towards him. “All this time we’ve been trying to figure out what could have killed Jeff. What do you want to bet it was him?”

 

“Vampires don’t tear people apart like that.” Xander reminded him.

 

“And since when did vampire act like a dog?” Cordelia asked archly. “Clearly he’s got a screw loose somewhere.”

 

Xander flinched backwards as Angel suddenly lunged towards them, stopped only by the chains. “Is it just me, or is that piece of wall looking mighty flimsy?”

 

“I vote we come back later.” Cordelia said quickly, turning around and fast walking towards the car. 

 

“With Oz’s dart gun.” Xander agreed, following her quickly as Angel lunged towards them again. “And maybe a stake.”

 

4-4-4

 

Finding out that Pete had been the one to kill Jeff, and Mr. Platt, and Debbie, and that he was now dead was a bit of a shocker. Though, nothing compared to the fact that Angel was alive and chained up in the house that Tony had just bought for Xander.

 

It was a strange how that piece of information helped put everything into perspective. 

 

It also helped reignite Xander’s anger towards Buffy because, really?! Angel had killed Miss Calendar, he had tortured Giles, he had tormented them all for months, how was her first move not to tell them that he was back? 

 

And Xander just knew that once the information got out, Willow and Giles would both pick Buffy’s side, because they always did, and Xander would be left out in the cold again. Because it wasn’t okay that Buffy had kept this from them! And he wasn’t even going to try pretend that it was.

 

It was partly for that reason, that Xander arranged for him and Cordelia to hang out with Faith the next afternoon. There were other reasons too of course. Given that she was the only person in the group, aside from Oz, that Cordy could stand, it was made sense that they tried to spend some time with her, and Xander had been planning to get to know her better anyway. But given that the fallout of Angel’s presence in the mansion was like a grenade waiting to explode, Xander figured that now was as good a time as ever to cultivate any possible allies.

 

Besides, spending time with Faith was hardly a chore. She was just as blunt as Xander and Cordelia were, and she told great stories. Not to mention that in the three hours they spent together, she never made gave any sign of disapproving of Xander and Cordelia’s relationship. It was refreshing to hang out with someone and not feel judged.

 

4-4-4

 

“Alright, JARVIS, send the plans to R&D.” Tony said, using his fingers to flick away the completed diagram of the medical imaging unit he had spent the last month designing. “What’s next?” 

 

“May I suggest that your turn your attention back to Sunnydale’s unusually high homicide rate, sir?” JARVIS asked. 

 

Tony frowned. “What are you talking about? Sunnydale’s homicide rate is exactly the national average - 18.2. We looked at it last week.”

 

A blue hologram of writing appeared in front of him. “Sir, if you would direct your attention to the information in front of you.”

 

Tony read the first few lines of writing, before rereading them. “This can’t be right, JARVIS. I would remember having read this before!”

 

“Yes, sir.” JARVIS agreed. “If I might theorize, it is possible that you are suffering from some form of mind manipulation.”

 

Tony shook his head. “Nothing like that has ever been proven.” He turned his attention back to the information in front of him. “Is this right? Did five hundred and twelve people really get murdered in Sunnydale last year? That’s insane! We’ve got to get Xander out of there! Screw getting him away from his parent. We’ve got to get him out of town!”

 

4-4-4

 

“Over five hundred people are murdered in Sunnydale every year?!” Tony exclaimed, staring at the information in front of him. “How long have you known about this?”

 

“Eleven days, sir.”

 

“Eleven days?! Why didn’t you tell me when you first found out?”

 

“I did, sir.” JARVIS answered gently. “I regret to inform you that you are currently suffering from some form of mind manipulation.”

 

“This kind of mind manipulation has never been proven.” Tony dismissed with a wave of his hand.”

 

“So you have informed me the last nine times we have had this conversation, sir.”

 

Tony’s mouth dropped open. “Seriously? JARVIS, are you sure you haven’t been hacked? Because that seems more likely than me forgetting something like that.”

 

Suddenly, the speakers began to emit a recording of Tony exclaiming in response to the information. 

 

“Okay,” Tony said, after having listened to a few sentences of him freaking out over information in the past. “So, this is new. Tell me we have a plan for this, JARVIS.”

 

“Yes, sir.” JARVIS assured him. “The first step of which being that, when you drive Mister Alexander’s car to Sunnydale this afternoon you will ask him what he knows about the high homicide rate in his town. I believe that you are hoping that, as a local to the area, he will be able to shed some light on the issue for you.”

 

“Unless his brain is being manipulated too.” Tony grumbled. “Why are you telling me this now? Won’t I just forget it again before I see him?”

 

“Your instructions were to remind you of the situation ever twenty four hours, sir.” JARVIS explained. “I will of course remind you again when you are speaking to Mister Alexander.”

 

4-4-4

 

It took Tony almost an hour and a half to drive to Sunnydale since, as tempting as it was, he didn’t want to draw attention to himself by speeding. He knew from experience that people were unlikely to recognise him as Tony Stark if he, a) drove like a boring person, b) wore casual clothes, and c) wore a baseball cap. Normally he wouldn’t have brought Happy with him either (bodyguards definitely drew people’s attention), but Happy turned into Grumpy whenever Tony left him behind, and Tony was going to need a ride home.

 

He had given Happy strict instructions to blend in though, which was why the man was driving a rental and wearing holey jeans and a baggy, grey t-shirt. Tony was hoping that he had bought the the clothes especially for their trip to Sunnydale, because the alternative was that his friend liked to look like a slob. He wondered if he should look into raising Happy’s salary.

 

The Welcome to Sunnydale sign was the most depressing welcome sign that Tony had ever seen and it practically screamed ‘small town’. Though not the good kind of small town. Malibu was small, its population was a third of the size of Sunnydale, but it was small because it was exclusive not small because most people couldn’t be paid to live there. 

 

He allowed JARVIS to direct him towards where he had arranged to meet Xander, and tried not to judge the town too harshly as he drove through it. He had arranged to meet Xander at one of the local parks, since people were less likely to spot them there. Tony’s suggestion had been that they meet at the house he had bought, but Xander hadn’t seemed keen on the idea (though he had assured Tony that he had visited the place).

 

Tony and Happy’s cars doubled the number of vehicles in the Radcliff Park parking area. The park was almost empty, with just a few children playing on the playground and their parents watching from nearby benches. The only other park occupant was Xander.

 

“Where do you want me, boss?” Happy asked, as Xander pushed himself off the tree he had been leaning against and began to stride towards them.

 

“You can take the afternoon off.” Tony told him. “Go get an icecream or something.”

 

“No can do.” Happy shook his head firmly. “JARVIS has given me strict instructions to stay by your side.”

 

Tony turned to him incredulously. “JARVIS did what? Just who do you think it is that signs your paycheck?”

 

Happy quirked an eyebrow. “Doesn’t JARVIS have full control of all your accounts, sir?”

 

“Not full control.” Tony protested. “I’m fine.” He brought out his phone. “JARVIS, tell Happy I’m fine.”

 

“I regret that I am unable to do as instructed, sir.” 

 

Tony glared at the phone. “Traitor!”

 

“Uh,” Xander paused a few feet away from them. “Am I interrupting something? I can come back…?”

 

Tony shoved his phone back in his pocket and turned to his son. “Xander, hi! No, don’t worry about it. JARVIS and Happy were just ganging up on me.”

 

Xander’s eyes darted towards Happy. “Oh, hi, I’m Xander.” He stepped forward and offered his hand.

 

“Harry.” Happy introduced himself, shaking Xander’s hand. “I’m Tony’s bodyguard and chauffer.”

 

Xander nodded awkwardly. “Yeah, he told me a bit about you. I’m his, uh…”

 

“Son.” Tony finished for him.

 

“Right.” Xander agreed, nodding his head nervously. 

 

“Anyway, Happy was just going.” Tony told Xander, with a pointed look for his friend.

 

“I was.” Happy agreed, before nodding his head towards a nearby seat. “I’ll be over there.”

 

“So,” Xander started, after Happy had walked away. “How was the drive?”

 

“Boring.” Tony complained, beginning to walk towards one of the seats that wasn’t occupied by any parents or bodyguards. “I haven’t driven that slow in years.”

 

“Bad traffic?” Xander asked sympathetically, as he fell into step beside him.

 

“Nah, but my driving style is pretty distinctive.” Tony explained. “I’ve had paparazzi find me just because someone saw me racing past them and called in a tip.”

 

“People actually care that much?” Xander asked, as they sat down on the empty seat. “That sounds really annoying.”

 

“It can be.” Tony shrugged. “How’s your day been so far?”

 

“Pretty good, I only just woke up about an hour ago.” Xander admitted with a grin. “I love Saturdays.”

 

“Ah, I remember those days.” Tony grinned. “Which is to say, three days ago. I sometimes get a bit carried away down in my workshop and forget to sleep, so when I do sleep I tend to sleep in.”

 

“I stay up late a lot too.” Xander told him. “Though not making things, more like, just hanging out with my friends.”

 

“And how are those friends of yours?”

 

“Cordy’s great!” Xander smiled dopily, before looking a little embarrassed. “She made me promise that I would ask you about our homecoming next weekend.”

 

“Homecoming?” Tony asked. “They still have those? Do you still have homecoming courts too?”

 

“Yeah, except we just have a homecoming queen.” Xander nodded. “Cordy’s going for it. So my life about to get really crazy.”

 

“Yeesh,” Tony grimaced. “Good luck with that. So what did she want you to ask me?”

 

Xander mumbled something incomprehensible.

 

“Huh?” 

 

“Uh, she wanted me to ask about a tux.” Xander repeated, his shoulders hunched uncomfortable. “You don’t have to worry about it it, I can borrow one from cousin Rigby.”

 

“No, definitely not.” Tony exclaimed passionately. “There is no way that you can wear a borrowed tux. Send JARVIS your measurements and he’ll arrange for something to be sent to you. Who is this cousin Rigby anyway?”

 

“Mom’s older brother’s son.” Xander explained. “They’re the only people in our family with money and they shun us, but I’m pretty sure if I asked he’d have an old one that he wouldn’t mind lending me for the night.”

 

“There are so many things wrong with that sentence.” Tony told him digging his hand into his pocket for his wallet. “Not the least being that as of today, you probably have more money than every member of cousin Rigby’s family combined.” He opened the wallet and retrieved the card with Xander’s name on it. “Here.”

 

Xander stared at the card as though it would bite him. “What…?”

 

“Remember how I told you that I was setting you up a bank account?” Tony asked him, forcing the card into his hand. “This is the card that goes with it. The pin is my name, because, well, why not? Probably not the most secure thing in the world, but you can change it later if you like.”

 

Xander was still staring at the card, but then he attempted to give it back. “I can’t...you should take it back!”

 

“Nope.” Tony dug his hands into his pockets so that Xander couldn’t push the card into them. “It’s not like it’s that big of a deal. Everything I have is going to be yours one day, anyway. It only makes sense that you get to enjoy some of it now.”

 

Xander’s expression of horror was almost comical. “What? No! You can’t leave it all to me. That’s a terrible idea.”

 

“I’m not going to do it anytime soon, obviously.” Tony pointed out. “I plan to live for at least twice as long as I already have, not to mention that, even if I did die now, you wouldn’t have to actually run the company or anything until you were twenty one.”

 

Xander’s mouth opened and closed a few times. “But...but...I’ll kill everything.”

 

“So I probably shouldn’t leave you any plants or animals then.” Tony said with a grin, before sobering when he saw just how freaked out Xander was. “It’ll be fine, Xander. You won’t have to run the company if you don’t want to. You can just appoint someone to run it for you.”

 

Xander didn’t look any calmer. “But what if you have another son, or a daughter? Shouldn’t you give it all to them?”

 

“First, the likelihood of me giving you siblings is very low.” Tony told him. “And secondly, as my firstborn I would probably give you majority share of the company anyway. Splitting up companies between children rarely goes well.”

 

“But what if your other kids are better at business than I am?!” Xander asked.

 

“I’ll tell you what,” Tony told him calmly. “If I ever have another child, and if I think they’ll do a better job of running my company than you, I’ll reconsider the issue. Alright?”

 

“Not really.” Xander commented, though he did look a little calmer. 

 

Tony’s phone buzzed in his pocket, but he ignored it. “Don’t worry about it. Just enjoy spending some of my hard earned cash. You could probably buy an island and not spend all the money connected to that account so go crazy, but don’t actually buy an island, not unless you’re ready for everyone to know.”

 

Xander stared at the card worriedly. “What if I lose it?”

 

“Then ring me and JARVIS will cancel the card.” Tony said, before pulling out his still buzzing phone. “Sorry, normally I wouldn’t answer my phone, but if JARVIS has let the phone ring this long it’s probably important.” He put the phone to his ear. “Yeah?”

 

“Sir, my apologies for interrupting,” JARVIS told him. “But you asked me to remind you that you had wanted to ask Master Alexander about the Sunnydale homicide rates.”

 

Tony frowned in confusion. “No, I didn’t.”

 

Suddenly he could hear his own voice. “And, JARVIS, make sure you ring me and tell me to ask Xander about why over five hundred people are murdered in Sunnydale every year.”

 

“JARVIS, what is going on?”

 

“Your mind appears to be being manipulated, sir.” JARVIS told him patiently. “I have had to remind you of this information eight times in the last eleven days.”

 

Tony glanced towards where Xander was watching him worriedly. “Are you sure about this, JARVIS? What makes you think Xander will know anything about it?”

 

“I believe your reasoning was that, as a resident of Sunnydale, Master Alexander might have some information that has not made its way to the internet.” 

 

“Right,” Tony had no idea what to believe. “Well, thanks, I’ll ask him.” He pulled the phone away from his ear.

 

“Ask me what?” Xander looked nervous.

 

“Uh,” Tony frowned. What had he been going to ask Xander again? “Do you want to go get some ice cream?”

 

“I am sorry to interrupt, Mister Alexander.” JARVIS’ crisp voice suddenly emitted loudly from the speakers of Tony’s phone. “But Mister Stark appears to be having some memory lapses regarding a specific subject.”

 

“Memory lapses?” Xander frowned. “Have you gone to see a doctor?”

 

Tony frowned at the phone. “I’m not having any memory lapses, JARVIS. Have you been hacked?”

 

“Which is exactly what someone who was having a memory lapse would say.” Xander pointed out. “What does he keep forgetting?”

 

“That five hundred and twelve people were murdered in Sunnydale in 2009.” JARVIS explained.

 

“What?” Tony shook his head. “That can’t be right. Sunnydale’s homicide rate is the same as the national average.”

 

“So you always insist, sir.” JARVIS sounded frustrated. 

 

Xander crossed his arms over his chest and looked around, as though checking to see if anyone was listening. “We even have an obituary in our School newspaper. Four people from by school were murdered last week. Well three of them were murdered, one of them overdosed. I don’t know how many other people were murdered though.”

 

Tony’s heart felt as though it had dropped to stomach. “Four of your classmates died last week? How did that not make the newspaper? I’ve been reading the Sunnydale Press online everyday.”

 

“It did, sir.” JARVIS told him. “However, your memory of reading about it appears to have been erased.”

 

“Actually, only three of them were my classmates.” Xander corrected. “The fourth person was Mister Platt, the school counsellor.”

 

“Hold up,” Tony said. “If what you’re saying is true, and five hundred and twelve people were murdered here last year, that means that the homicide rate here is over seven thousand percent higher than the national average. That’s insane!”

 

“Yeap.” Xander acknowledged. “I’ve never actually done the maths before, but I’ve never understood why people stay here. Though, I guess your memory lapse thing kind of explains it.”

 

“Memory manipulation has never been proven in case studies.” Tony pointed out.

 

“Maybe not, but by the sound of it you’re currently experiencing some anecdotal proof.”

 

“Anecdotal evidence isn’t proof.” Tony told him. “JARVIS, are you sure about this?”

 

“Yes, sir.” JARVIS told him. “You had intended to ask Master Alexander if he knew why the homicide rate was so high.”

 

“Yeah, I’ll bet I did.” Tony commented, before turning to Xander who had a considering expressing. “Xander?”

 

“You’re not going to believe me if I tell you.” Xander told him. “You’re going to think I’m nuts. Heck, I didn’t even believe it until I saw some proof.”

 

“So tell me, and then show me proof.” Tony told him. 

 

“Alright,” Xander agreed after a long pause. “But only if you promise to at least humour me until I can prove it to you.”

 

“Cross my heart and hope to die.” Tony said dryly.

 

“Okay,” Xander took a deep breath. “Vampires are real.”

  
  



	6. FrictION

Tony and Happy’s reaction to the existence of vampires went pretty much exactly the way that Xander had thought it would go. Laughter followed by disbelief, then concern for Xander’s sanity, and finally horror when Xander had taken them to the mansion and they had seen Angel’s game face and realised that Xander was telling the truth. (Though Tony had spent the rest of their time together trying to come up with an explanation for the existence of vampires that didn’t involve the words demons and magic.)

 

The hardest part had been convincing Tony to leave him in Sunnydale and, for the first time, Xander thought he had some idea of why Buffy had lied to her mom for so long about slaying. As nice as it was to have an adult actually caring about his safety, it just wasn’t practical for Xander to pack up and leave. Nor was it practical for Tony to give up everything and dedicate his life to killing vampires. Even if his Iron Man suit would make him basically invulnerable to them.

 

Tony had eventually given in to Xander’s arguments, but before he had left he had made it perfectly clear just how unhappy he was that Xander was risking his life on a weekly basis without any sort of proper weaponry. He had then promised to create some weapons specifically designed to kill vampires and send them to Xander. Which was great, except it was going to put Xander in a tough spot. How could he have weapons that could kill vampires and not share them with Willow and Buffy? But how could he share them with Willow and Buffy without having them ask where they had come from? 

 

Though, really, since he had used Angel as his proof, Xander’s more pressing issue was going to be convincing the vampire not to tell Buffy what he had seen. The convenience of being able to use Angel’s game face as proof was enough to make Xander glad that he had listened to Cordelia’s reasons on why they shouldn’t just kill him, but he’d been hoping that Angel would have still been as animalistic as he had been when he and Cordelia had first found him. That wasn’t the case. Sure Angel was a little more feral than usual, and definitely more quiet, but the vampire had definitely had his wits about him and, because apparently Buffy was completely insane, he wasn’t chained up anymore.

 

So, after having farewelled Tony and Happy, and watched them drive away in the direction of the Motorway, Xander turned on his heel and made his way back into the mansion.

 

“Angel.” He acknowledged, standing near the door with his hands in his pockets.

 

“Xander.” Angel’s expression was anguished. 

 

“Fancy seeing you here.” Xander said. “I’ve got to say. I think I prefered you when you were in chains.”

 

Angel glanced towards where the chains were hanging from the ceiling, before wincing. “You were here…before?”

 

“Me and Cordy came by.” Xander told him. “I was all for coming back with Oz’s tranq gun and a stake, but Cordelia convinced me not to. Apparently, you having a soul again, makes killing you a lot like murder. And Buffy would never speak to me again, though I don’t think Cordy meant that to be a bad thing.”

 

A year ago, Angel would have sighed exasperatedly and eyed Xander condescendingly. Six months ago, Angel would have torn out his throat. Now, Angel just looked away uncomfortably.

 

“So what’s Buffy’s plan?” Xander asked, leaning back against the wall. “Keep you here like a little pet until your soul goes on vacation and you try and kill us all  _ again. _ ”

 

Angel looked pained. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Yeah, well, that doesn’t actually change anything.” Xander pointed out. “What are you going to tell Buffy?”

 

Angel’s gaze flicked towards the door to Xander’s left. “About your father?”

 

Xander pulled his hands out of his pockets and cross his arms defensively. “How did you…”

 

“You smell similar.” Angel interrupted him. “Besides, I could hear you arguing outside.”

 

“Oh,” Xander said with a grimace. “You could smell that we were related? Do you know how weird and gross that is?”

 

Angel didn’t say anything.

 

“Anyway,” Xander continued. “Nobody knows about Tony, well, nobody except Cordy, and I want it to stay like that for as long as possible.”

 

“So you don’t want me to tell her.” Angel concluded.

 

“Also, Tony, my father, actually owns this house now.” Xander told him. “He bought it for me, so I wouldn’t have to live with my parents anymore.”

 

“So you want me to move out.” Angel said, resignedly.

 

Xander opened his mouth to say ‘yes’, before changing his mind. “Is there a way to make the top story of this place my house, without this floor being part of it? Because if there is, and if you swear not to tell Buffy about Tony, or that I might stay here sometimes, or that I know that you’re here, I might be alright with you staying here. But there is no way that I’m inviting you into my house.”

 

Angel looked about as surprised by Xander’s words as Xander felt. What on earth had he been thinking? Was Buffy’s soft-on-Angel attitude contagious or something?!

 

“Wait,” Xander said suddenly. “Why can you get in now?”

 

“We only have to be invited into someone’s home.” Angel said stiffly.

 

“And I don’t consider this my home.” Xander realised. “Well, can you go upstairs? Have you tried?”

 

“No.”

 

“Well, can you go try now?”

 

Angel’s shoulders were slumped as he turned around and slowly made his way across the room towards the door that led to the staircase. Xander had only been up the staircase once, when he’d come here to rescue Giles, and that definitely wasn’t something he wanted to be thinking about with Angel right in front of him. That way led to rage and murderous thoughts about staking vampires, soul or no soul. 

 

Once Angel reached the door, he turned the handle and pulled the door open. Then he attempted to step through it, before being stopped by a barrier.

 

“Huh,” Xander commented, as Angel made his way back to where he had previously been standing. “Why do you think that is?”

 

“The same reason vampires don’t need an invitation to enter your garage.” Angel told him. “So, can I stay?”

 

“Is there another entrance?” Xander asked. “Or will I have to walk past you and risk being eaten every day?”

 

“There’s a back door.”

 

“Then you can stay.” Xander said, before instantly regretting it. “But you can’t tell Buffy anything!”

 

5-5-5

 

Xander had never actually seen the second storey of the mansion so he wasn’t sure what he expecting. Maybe something a bit like Cordy’s room, only smaller? Or maybe like the little bit of Angel’s apartment that he had seen back before the vampire had lost his soul?

 

He was surprised to find a ginormous television that was surrounded by the most comfortable looking bean bags, chairs, and couch that Xander had ever seen. There was more to the place than that, a bedroom with another tv and a huge bed, a bathroom with an actual bath, and a kitchen, but the tv was definitely the highlight. 

 

After having quickly looked the entire place over, and testing out the bed’s potential as a trampoline (not that he would ever admit that to anyone), Xander plopped himself down in front of the tv and turned it on only to discover that Tony had apparently bought him cable and a premium Netflix subscription. Tony was awesome!

 

It was tempting to spend the night at the apartment, but Xander still hadn’t decided that he wanted to move into the place (with his moment of idiocy in letting Angel, stay he was feeling less and less sure that he wanted to), and he wanted an excuse to drive his new car. Not to mention that there wasn’t any food in the fridge or cupboards. 

 

Which meant that he would need to go grocery shopping sometimes to stock the kitchen, something that would definitely be possible because of the card in his wallet that would apparently buy him a small island if he wanted one. How was this his life?

 

Driving the car that Tony had given him was just...there were no words to describe it. It drove smoothly, nothing like his uncle’s car, and it even had a cord so that he could hook his phone up to the speakers and play music through it. The looks that people gave the car were satisfying too. 

 

Xander had spent his entire life being the kid in hand-me-downs, the kid with second hand books, and who never had cool stuff. Only now he did, he had a cool car, and it was all his!

 

The best look of all came the next day when he met Cordelia for lunch and she saw the car for the first time. Xander had always felt a bit bad that Cordelia had had to sacrifice some of her social standing to date him. It was like he was Mia in Princess Diaries, and she was Michael - and she had seen him when he was invisible (and, okay, wow, he had definitely let the girls talk him into watching one too many chick flicks if he was finding parallels with his own life in them). But now her sacrifice was paying off, because he was heir to Tony Stark and had a cool car, and apparently enough money to buy a small island (which would never stop being weird).

 

After lunch (which Xander paid for using the card that Tony had given him), Cordelia accompanied Xander to the grocery store and then to the mansion so that he could so her around.

 

They parked the car in Glebe Park, so that nobody would see it outside the mansion, before trekking a few minutes into the woods until they reached the back fence which, thankfully, had a gate. Xander thoroughly doubted that he would have managed to convince Cordelia to scale the fence, and especially not with grocery bags in her hands.

 

They made their way through the back entrance, taking care to be quiet in case Buffy was visiting Angel, before carrying the grocery bags up the stairs.

 

Xander pushed the door open and led Cordelia in. “Taadaa!”

 

“Very nice.” Cordelia sounded impressed, as she made her way to the kitchen bench and dumped the two bags she was holding down on it. “I like the black.”

 

“Me too.” Xander grinned. “It’s almost as though Tony knew how likely it was that I would spill things.”

 

“The view is nice too.” Cordelia said, walking over to the windows. “You can even see the lake from here.”

 

Xander stood beside her. “Oh, yeah. I didn’t notice that yesterday.”

 

“Let me guess,” Cordelia started dryly. “You came in and only really noticed the tv.”

 

“Have you seen how big it is?” Xander asked, turning towards it. “And Tony put cable  _ and  _ Netflix on it, so I can watch pretty much anything I want to. There’s a tv in the bedroom to, so I can watch tv when I’m going to sleep.”

 

“So you’ve decided to move in then?” Cordelia asked, walking around the room and running her hands over the top of the couch.

 

“No,” Xander sighed. “I don’t see how I could keep it a secret if I did, especially with Angel living here.” He grimaced at the reminder of his housemate. “I don’t know what I was thinking letting him stay.”

 

“At least this way Buffy won’t be wondering why he moved.” Cordelia pointed out. “Besides, I think you underestimate just how self-obsessed Buffy and Willow really are. They haven’t noticed anything is off yet, have they?”

 

“No,” Xander admitted. “But it’s not like much has changed.”

 

Cordelia speared him with a look. “Yes, it has, they just haven’t noticed. Besides, when was the last time either of them went around to your house?”

 

Xander frowned. “Uh…”

 

“Exactly! Besides, you said you’d told Angel that he could only stay if he helped keep your secret, right?” Cordelia asked. “So he’ll probably cover for you if Buffy hears noises up here anyway.”

 

“You think?” Xander asked doubtfully. “Cos, Angel and I aren’t exactly best buds.”

 

“Maybe not,” Cordelia said. “But you’re practically his landlord now…”

 

“Tony’s his landlord.” Xander corrected. “He’s the one who owns this place.”

 

Cordelia rolled his eyes. “Either way, he’ll cover for you so that he can keep staying here. I mean, really, just how many places are there where he could stay?”

 

“It’s kind of crappy down there.” Xander pointed out. “There’s not any furniture or anything. If we’re going to try and bribe him to keep quiet, I should probably at least find a bed to put there or something, and maybe buy him some blood.”

 

Cordelia’s expression turned predatory as she walked towards him and wrapped his arms around his neck. “You’re like the most Slytherin of all Slytherins.”

 

Xander was torn between pulling away in offence and kissing her. “See, you say that like it’s a compliment, but I’ve seen the movies and the Slytherins aren’t the good guys.” 

 

Cordelia just kissed him.

 

5-5-5

 

Xander had no idea who had been stupid enough to schedule their year photos on the Monday of Homecoming week. There were whole weeks with nothing on except classes, couldn’t they have scheduled the yearbook photos for one of those weeks? But then, not everyone was as involved in the homecoming process as he was. The Freshmen, Sophomores, and Juniors weren’t even invited, and most of the Seniors wouldn’t have to do anything other than turn up in fancy clothes and dance.

 

Not Xander though, no. He had been conscripted into Cordelia’s campaign staff and, boy, did his girlfriend know how to make people work. Not to mention that Willow had asked him to come over and help her to find a dress for the dance and Xander hadn’t been willing to turn her down. They had used to do that kind of stuff together a lot, but now Xander only ever saw Willow in group situations. It was sucky, and he missed her - even if she had been driving him insane recently.

 

Thankfully though, the yearbook photos were out of the way by Monday night and Xander was able to turn his full attention to Cordelia’s campaign - at least, that was his intention until everything went to hell.

 

“So…” Xander started unsurely, as he and Cordelia walked to AP English Lit  together. “Did you really forget to tell Buffy about the yearbook photos?”

 

Cordelia stiffened. “This had better not be the start of your ‘Buffy can do no wrong’ routine, Xander.”

 

“No routine.” Xander assured her quickly. “I just wanted to know your side of the story.”

 

“But your first guess is that I purposefully didn’t tell her?” Cordelia asked through her teeth, smiling fakely at each of the students they were passing.

 

“Sorry,” Xander sighed. “It’s just that you aren’t Buffy’s biggest fan and that you’re pretty mad at her at the moment and…”

 

“Only because she’s been treating you like crap.” Cordelia told him. “Though I don’t know why I even bother to get angry on your behalf. You always defend her!”

 

“No defending here.” Xander reminded her. “So, I take it you really did forget? Because that wouldn’t be surprising, I mean, with all the stress you’re under at the moment.”

 

Cordelia’s expression seemed to relax slightly. “Yes, I forgot. I was about to go in and tell her, when I saw Bobby and Mishad and I got distracted. Then Buffy comes over, all aggressive, and practically calls me selfish, and then mocks my campaign and now she’s decided she’s going to beat me.” She rolled her eyes. “As if.”

 

“Okay,” Xander nodded. “I can definitely see all that happening, the only bit I’m a bit confused about is where you’re upset she called you selfish. You call yourself that all the time.”

 

“And you call yourself an idiot.” Cordelia retorted. “Doesn’t stop it from hurting when Willow or Buffy do.”

 

“Point.” Xander acknowledged. “So, now what? You know Buffy was like Prom Princess at her old school and all that stuff. It’s not like it’s me or Willow trying to run for it. She actually knows what she’s doing.”

 

“She might have been popular in LA,” Cordelia said haughtily. “But all she is here is the weird freak who got kicked out of school. I’ve known these people my whole life, not to mention that I’m Captain of the Cheerleading team. I’m not scared of her.”

 

5-5-5

 

After dinner that night, Xander went around to Willow’s house to help her pick out a dress. Willow had suggested that he bring his tux so that it was a real dress rehearsal, but since Xander’s tux hadn’t arrived yet that wasn’t an option.

 

It was both strange and nice to hang out with Willow. The last time they had done anything, just the two of them, had been the Science Symposium which, not only had ended with him and Willow had odds, but also seemed like it had been a lifetime ago.

 

They talked about school, and Oz, and the homecoming, and how cool it was that Xander’s uncle had given him a car, and Willow didn’t make a single comment about Cordelia all night, but despite the ease of conversation, Xander realised that he still had absolutely no desire to tell Willow about Tony. It was as if there was a distance between them now, and he had no idea how to cross it. 

 

Still, the night went well, and after having tried on all the ugly outfits in her closet, Willow finally managed to pull out something that looked amazing on her, and then they were dancing, just to make sure they could, and then they were staring into each other’s eyes, and Willow was so beautiful, and he just wanted to...

 

“No!” Xander pushed Willow away and took a step back. There was absolutely no way he was going screw everything up with Cordelia, who had been the best girlfriend he could ask for, by kissing Willow. Especially since Willow had kind of been a bitch to him for the last few months. 

 

What was it with him and being attracted girls who treated him like crap? When he and Cordy had first kissed they’d still pretty much hated each other and, yeah, they’d moved past that now, but why would he have chosen now to be attracted to Willow? It made no sense!

 

“Definitely no!” Willow agreed quickly, looking startled. “I would never, like ever, ever! Because Oz…”

 

“And Cordelia.” Xander agreed, before beginning to move to the door. “I should go, right now.”

 

He practically ran out of her house, not even waiting to get to his car before he scrambling for his cellphone in his pocket and ringing Tony’s number.

 

“Are you alright?” Tony answered the phone on the first ring. “Are you hurt? Did you get attacked?”

 

“I’m fine.” Xander assured him, turning the key in the ignition and plugging his phone into the handless device Tony had included with the car.. “Well, no, I’m not fine, but not because of vampires or anything. Because I almost kissed Willow.”

 

“Oh,” Tony let out a sigh. “Alright then. That’s good.”

 

“Sorry for scaring you.” Xander said. “I probably shouldn’t have even told you about vampires and stuff.”

 

“No, you should have!” Tony disagreed. “It might just take me some time to adjust. So you kissed Willow, huh?”

 

“Almost kissed, I almost kissed Willow!” Xander corrected. “Which is terrible because I’m dating Cordelia, and I think that I might love her, and I’ve never liked Willow that way, not even when she liked me that way, but tonight she was wearing this stupid black dress and we were practising our dancing and...and…”

 

“You almost kissed her.” Tony finished for him. 

 

“Yeah.” Xander thunked his head against the headrest behind him. “What the hell do I do?”

 

“Well, given that I’ve never been in a committed monogamous relationship in my life, I’m not sure that I’m really the person you want to be talking to.” Tony said, sounding more amused than anything.

 

Xander felt strangely let down. “Oh.”

 

“But, I’ll give you what I’ve got.” Tony added. “Relationships are like contracts between companies, well, they’re not really, but just go with it.”

 

“Okay,” Xander nodded. “Except I don’t actually know anything about contracts between companies.”

 

“Well, I don’t know much about relationships that don’t come with an employment contract.” Tony pointed out. “So work with me here. When companies make a deal, like, lets say Stark Industries were about to make an exclusive deal with Hospital Corp. so that for the next five years they would buy only our Medical Imaging Units, but at a discounted price. If Hospital Corp ever changed their mind, and wanted to buy someone else’s MIUs (which they wouldn’t, because ours are going to better than anything else on the market) they would have to get out of our contract first - which would cost them a few million dollars as a penalty for terminating the contract early. If they didn’t terminate the contract before buying someone else's MIUs, we could sue them for hundreds of millions of dollars.”

 

Xander processed that. “So what you’re saying is that if I want to break the contract, I  need to  terminate it first. But what if I don’t want to break the contract?”

 

“Then don’t buy Willow’s MIUs.” Tony said simply. “And, is it just me or is this analogy kind of getting away from us.”

 

“It’s not that simple.” Xander complained.

 

“Yes, it is.” Tony disagreed. “If you’re going to do something, do it right. If I was to ever start dating...someone, I would only do so if I absolutely knew that I could keep to the commitment I was making.”

 

“So your advice is, don’t kiss her.” Xander summed up, as he parked his car outside his parents house.

 

“Basically.” Tony agreed. “Sorry, probably not very helpful.”

 

“Any ideas on how not to kiss her?” Xander asked desperately.

 

“Uh,” Tony sounded about as stumped as Xander felt. “Don’t spend time alone with her?”

 

“Well, that shouldn't be hard.” Xander acknowledged. “We hardly did that anyway, and she’s probably going to want to avoid me like the plague now.”

 

“There you go then.” Tony told him brightly. “Now, how are you finding the mansion? Did you get rid of the vampire yet? I cannot believe I just said that in normal conversation.”

 

“No, I’m actually letting him stay.” Xander admitted. “He’s going to help cover for me with Buffy, but don’t worry, he can't get up to the second floor. Besides, I haven't actually moved in yet.”

 

“Yeah, that’s not going to stop me worrying.” Tony told him. “Why haven’t you moved in yet?”

 

“It’s only been like four days since you were here.” Xander pointed out. “And I’ve been busy.”

 

“Ah, yes, homecoming.” Tony was sounding amused again. “How is your girlfriend’s campaign going?”

 

“Alright, I think.” Xander shrugged. “But now Buffy’s decided to try and beat her and, well, it’s not going to be pretty. By the way, is Stark Industries really making a deal with Hospital Corp? Should I be buying shares or something?”

 

“Let's just say that a deal is being discussed.” Tony answered. “But you definitely can’t buy any shares. That is pretty much the definition of insider trading, which could get you thrown into prison for twenty years.”

 

“Twenty years?!” Xander exclaimed. “That’s more than some people get for murder.”

 

“Speaking of murder,” Tony said brightly. “Or well, not murder, but violence. I had JARVIS look into a martial arts instructor in Sunnydale but, well, everyone there is terrible.”

 

“Any good ones probably got eaten.” Xander commented.

 

“That is horrifying.” Tony told him. “Any chance you’ve changed your mind and are willing to move in with me in Malibu? It’s less than an hour and a half’s drive. You could still visit your friends during the daylight hours.”

 

Xander winced at the hope in Tony’s voice. “Uh,”

 

“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” Tony sighed. “Anyway, since I know what exactly you’re wanting to fight against, I’ve arranged for someone fly down to Sunnydale to teach you three times a week.

 

“What?” Xander asked, his voice embarrassingly high. 

 

“Do Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday afternoons work for you?” Tony asked. “He’ll probably want to work with you for about two hours a session.”

 

“You’re flying someone to Sunnydale three times a week?”

 

Tony laughed. “Yeah, David Wells. He’s a friend of Happy’s. Used to be a marine, so you won’t exactly be learning a martial art, but you’ll be learning how to fight and that’s what you’re after, right?”

 

“You can’t just fly someone down to teach me.” Xander argued. “That sounds really expensive.”

 

“Xander, I’m Tony Stark. I’m number one on the Forbes List of Billionaires, and if this is going to keep you alive, well, there’s nothing I wouldn’t pay.”

 

Xander had no idea what to say to that. 

 

“So can you do Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday afternoons?” Tony asked. “And does next Tuesday work for you? My original plan was for you to practise in the first floor of the mansion, but I guess that doesn’t really work anymore. I’ll see about hiring out a hall.”

 

“Uh, yeah. That works for me.” Xander admitted. “At least all this homecoming stuff will be over by then. Well, it will be if Cordy and Buffy don’t decide to really go at it and take the world down with them.

 

5-5-5

 

The next morning Buffy called Xander, Willow, and Oz into the library and proceeded to give them their marching orders. The problem was that she didn’t seem to have any idea that they were already helping Cordelia. (Was she really that oblivious about what they were doing with their lives?) 

 

The worst part was her whiteboard that had strengths and weaknesses columns for each of the other girls in the running. Well, no. that wasn’t the worst bit. The worst bit was that Buffy had put his name down as one of Cordy’s weaknesses. Xander wasn’t sure what angered him the most, that Buffy thought so little of him, that she hadn’t even tried to hide it from him, or that she so oblivious to his life that she wasn’t aware that he was increasingly popular among their classmates.

 

Sure he would never reach Cordelia’s level of coolness, but he’d been attending a few parties with Cordy and hanging out with some of her old friends and, while they would never be best buddies, they always acknowledged him in the corridors now. So, yeah, maybe he wasn’t exactly one of the Cordelia’s strengths, but he wasn’t a weakness either.

 

So he spent the next two days supporting Cordelia, and made friendly with all the jocks and geeks (even the ones who were still furious at him for dating Cordy) and mostly just tried to stay out of Buffy and Willow’s way (and tried to keep Cordelia out of Buffy’s way too). 

 

5-5-5

 

“We need to talk.”

 

Xander didn’t look up from his SAT studybook. “No, we don’t.”

 

“Yes, we do.” Willow said, plonking herself down on the seat opposite him. “We almost kissed, Xander!”

 

“Shhh!” Xander almost shouted, looking around worriedly. “Are you crazy? Do you want the entire school to know about that?”

 

“Sorry,” Willow lowered her voice. “We almost kissed, and now Cordelia’s gone crazy and…”

 

“You think this is all Cordelia’s fault?” Xander interrupted, closing his textbook. “It takes two to tango, Wils, and even if it didn’t, Buffy was the one to start it. She never cared about being homecoming queen until Tuesday morning. Cordy’s been planning this is for weeks.”

 

“Buffy only started it because Cordelia didn’t tell her about the yearbook photos.” Willow defended.

 

“Which was an honest mistake.” Xander snapped. “Cordy’s under a lot of pressure at the moment and…”

 

Willow snorted. “Yeah, pressure. Cordy wouldn’t know pressure if a ten ton weight was pushing down on her.”

 

“Whereas Buffy handles pressure so well.” Xander replied sarcastically. “What’s she going to do if she loses? Run off to LA again?”

 

Willow’s mouth dropped open. “You can’t still be upset about that!”

 

“No, I’m not.” Xander acknowledged, stuffing his book into his bag and standing up. “But that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten about it either.”

 

“Wait!” Willow called, as Xander began to walk away. “We need to talk about the...you know what.”

 

“Fine.” Xander turned on his heel and dropped back into his seat. “Talk.”

 

Willow looked startled. “Well, actually, I, uh, was, uh…”

 

“It was a mistake.” Xander told her sternly. “And thankfully, it didn’t become a catastrophe. I love Cordy! So we,” He waved a finger between them. “Are going to avoid being in places that might make us more likely to make more mistakes.”

 

“You love Cordelia?” Willow looked grossed out. “That’s just...besides, you can’t stop hanging out with your friends because you have a new girlfriend! We always laughed at those people.”

 

“First, yes, I love Cordelia.” Xander answered, through clenched teeth. “And I am really sick of you always making comments like that. She’s my girlfriend, I love her, get over it. Second, Cordy’s not my ‘new girlfriend’, we’ve almost been dating six months. And third,” He stood up. “I’m not going to stop hanging out with my friends. I’m just going to stop hanging out with you when no one else is around, because you have Oz, and I have Cordelia, and we don’t want to make any more mistakes. Now I have to go. I have somewhere to be.”

 

“No, you don’t.” Willow argued. “You’re just trying to get away. You never have anything to do that doesn’t involve me, Buffy, or Cordelia, and Buffy’s training with Giles, and Cordelia’s probably off paying people to vote for her.”  

 

“Goodbye, Willow.”

 

5-5-5

 

Buffy and Cordelia were still going at it the next morning and, after his conversation with Willow the day before, Wils had apparently thrown all her lot in with Buffy. Thankfully, Cordelia had long since copied Willow’s database across to her own laptop so it wasn’t a complete loss.

 

The increase in tension mean that Xander doubled his efforts to make sure that Cordelia and Buffy didn’t cross paths. Which was working fine, until he had to go pee and then everything went to hell.

 

He missed the first part of it, but from he could patch together, Buffy had confronted Cordelia on her campaigning techniques ( apparently Jonathan had told her that Cordy was giving out money - the weaselly little liar). Cordelia retaliated of course, because Cordy never backed down from a fight, and Buffy returned fire (even using her extra strength to stop Cordy from pushing past her), at which point Cordy called Buffy a crazy freak and Buffy called Cordy a vapid whore, and everything hit rock bottom.

 

“There is no way I am sharing a limo with that bitch!” Cordelia raged later, when she and Xander were alone. “I refuse to let her ruin my Homecoming Dance.”

 

Xander winced. “I think it’s probably too late to hire another one. We could always take my car?”

 

“The limo is booked under my name, you know.” Cordelia closed her eyes and breathed deeply. “But, fine. They can have the limo.”

 

Xander squeezed her hand gratefully. “What about Faith? Does she have the ticket you bought her?”

 

“I gave it to her last week.” Cordelia answered. “Though, I think she’s going with Buffy now. Apparently Buffy was feeling sorry for herself after Scott broke up with her, which anyone with eyes could completely see coming, and Faith cheered her up by offering to go as her date.”

 

“Her date?” 

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Not like that.”

 

“Oh,” Xander flushed. “Right. It’s probably for the best anyway. Faith still has to train with Buffy and stuff. She really doesn’t need to pick sides in all this.”

 

Cordelia sniffed haughtily. “As though she would ever pick Buffy’s side over ours. We’re the ones who have been taking her out for dinner and who invited her to the dance as something other than a backup plan. Buffy just treats her like a rent-a-slayer.”

 

Xander sighed, she wasn’t wrong. “Anyway, the garment bag with my tux was delivered to my house yesterday and I’m going to be getting ready at the mansion. Should I pick you up from your house?”

 

“Yes, at seven.” Cordelia decided, before narrowing her eyes. “Do you even know how to put on a tux?”

 

Xander winced. “Like a suit?”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Ask Angel if you need help. I bet he’s worn a tux before. Oh, and before I forget: Jonathan was trying to spread a stupid rumour that you kissed Willow. Personally I think that Buffy set him up to it just to discredit me, but don’t worry - I stomped on him like when we squashed those disgusting cockroaches.” She shuddered. “He won’t be spreading that around anymore.”

 

Xander’s stomach dropped. “Oh, uh, actually, it wasn’t Buffy who started the rumour.”

 

Cordelia studied his expression for a second before stepping away from him. “What did you do?”

 

“It happened when I went to Willow’s to help her pick a dress.” Xander explained quickly, before noticing Cordelia’s horrified and hurt expression. “But I didn’t actually kiss her!”

 

“What did you do?” Cordelia asked again, as she crossed her hands over her chest. 

 

“She was wearing this black dress.” Xander tried to explain. “And then she said she was worried that she wouldn’t know how to dance, so I danced with her. And then all of a sudden, I just wanted to kiss her, and she looked as though she wanted to kiss me, but I left and I rang Tony and he’s given me advice on how to make sure it never happens again, because I don’t want to kiss Willow, because I love you and…”

 

“You love me?” Cordelia’s angry expression softened, as her arms fell to her sides.

 

“Yeah,” Xander nodded desperately. “I do. This isn’t exactly how I wanted to tell you, I wanted to make it romantic or something, but I love you, Cordelia Chase, and I would never, ever want to kiss Willow or do anything to hurt you.”

 

“I love you too.” Cordelia admitted, stepping towards him. 

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open. “Really?”

 

“Really.”

 

5-5-5

 

Opening the garment bag felt a lot like opening a Christmas present. There was some anxiety that came along with it of course - what if it didn’t fit? It was way too late for him to try and find another tux for the dance - but mostly he was just bouncing with excited anticipation.

He carefully unzipped both sides of the bag, before staring in wonder at the tuxedo in front of him. It was so...tuxedo like and, given the Tony had been the one to buy it for him, it was probably a really expensive one. Xander just wished he knew enough about tuxedos to be excited for a reason other than the fact that now actually owned his very own tuxedo.

 

Xander tugged the note attached to the coathanger towards him and read it.

 

_ ‘Xander,  _

 

_ Here’s your tuxedo. I had one of my favourite tailors make it for you - though I think I might need to avoid him for a while. He wasn’t exactly thrilled that you weren’t available for a fitting.  _

 

_ Anyway, have a good night! (And don’t forget the cufflinks and pocket square, they’re in the pocket of the bag.) _

 

_ Tony’ _

 

Putting on a tuxedo was a lot harder than Xander had thought it would be. The pants, shirt, waistcoat and jacket were easy, but Xander had absolutely no idea how to get the cufflinks, pocket square, and bowtie on properly.

 

Damn Cordelia and her omniscient nature. Now he had to go talk to Angel and ask for his help.

 

Angel was doing some kind of...something when Xander stepped through the door, all slow and movementy, but he stopped as soon as Xander entered the room.

 

“Xander.”

 

“Angel.” Xander returned. “Do you know how to tie a bowtie and stuff?”

 

Angel shot him an incredulous look.

 

“Look this wasn’t my idea.” Xander told him. “Cordelia said that if I needed help I should ask you and, while I think it’s a terrible idea, because a ripped out throat really won’t go with this suit, I don’t really have any other options.”

 

Angel sighed. “Why are you wearing a tux anyway?”

 

“It’s homecoming tonight.” Xander answered, stepping closer and offering Angel his bowtie. “Didn’t Buffy tell you?”

 

“No.” Angel looked pained, or maybe that it was just that he was in pain. 

 

“Oh,” Xander winced. “Well, I guess she didn’t want to make you feel weird or something. Anyway, do you know how to tie a bowtie?”

 

“Yes.” Angel answered grudgingly, before almost falling over and catching himself on a nearby wall.

 

Xander watched him in concern. “Are you alright? Not that I really care, but, well, if you’re going to be helping cover for me with Buffy I’d rather you weren’t half dead.”

 

Angel slowly made his way towards a nearby seat and dropped down onto it. “I’m...improving.”

 

“Good.” Xander shifted uncomfortably. “Do you need some more blood or something? And I, uh, noticed that you don’t have a bed down here. I could find one for you?”

 

Angel didn’t seem to know how to respond. “I’m fine.”

 

“Sure you are.” Xander scoffed. “You can barely stand.”

 

“And you can’t tie a bowtie.” Angel retorted. 

 

Xander stared at him. “Not the best comeback in the world, but I’m going to take it as confirmation that you can tie them. Can you tie mine?”

 

Angel sighed. “Fine.”

 

“And I need help with my pocket square and cufflinks too.” Xander added quickly, cautiously stepping over towards where Angel was sitting. “And no biting!”

 

Angel rolled his eyes.

 

5-5-5

 

Xander didn’t think he would ever get used to driving around in the car that Tony had given him and, while he thought it would have been cool to have taken a limo to the dance, having to take his car instead didn’t seem like much of a sacrifice.

 

He made sure to open and shut Cordelia’s door for her, and then drop her off at the entrance of the dance before going to park the car, but he was pleasantly surprised to realise that Cordelia had waited for him to enter.

 

“Nice suit, Xander.” Audrey, one of the girls manning the entrance table, commented. “Where’d you get it?”

 

“Oh, I had a tailor from Malibu make it for me.” Xander told her smoothly, passing across his and Cordelia’s tickets with a wink. 

 

Audrey giggled. “You’re so funny.”

 

Cordelia’s fingers dug into Xander’s arm as she tugged him towards the dance. “Must you flirt with every girl who flirts with you?”

 

Xander stared at her, wide eyed. “She was flirting with me?”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Of course she was. You can’t seriously be that oblivious.”

 

“Well, it’s not as though I’ve had much experience with being flirted with.” Xander pointed out.

 

“ _ I _ flirt with you.” Cordelia reminded him.

 

“Yes, but that mostly involves you calling me names.” Xander pointed out with a grin. “It’s our thing.”

 

Cordelia led him over to the drinks table and, after they had each taken a cup of punch, they looked around the room. “I don’t see Buffy.”

 

“Or Willow, or Faith.” Xander agreed, searching the room. “Oz is here, but then he’s in the band so he was probably here early setting everything up.”

 

“Maybe their limo got lost.” Cordelia commented, not sounding all that upset about the idea. “We should work the room. The voting doesn’t close for another hour and I want to remind people why I am the obvious choice.”

 

“Sure,” Xander agreed. “But we should get something from the refreshment table first. To nourish us for the battle.”

 

Cordelia looked amused. “Alright, the refreshment table and then schmoozing.”

 

Schmoozing was actually a lot more fun than it had originally sounded to Xander. As someone who had spent most of his life on the outside of pretty much every social group (and failed at his attempts not to care) it was an amazing experience to be so accepted. He and Cordelia slowly worked their way through the room, complimenting people, being complimented, and making people laugh. They even managed to get through to some of the geeks that had been ostracising Xander ever he and Cordelia had started dating.

 

When the voting eventually closed, he and Cordelia returned to the refreshment table to find more sustenance before joining the other couples on the dancefloor.

 

“Xander, there you are! Have you seen Buffy?” Willow’s voice sounded suddenly from behind him.

 

Xander spun around in surprise. “What? Is she missing? What happened?”

 

“I don’t know.” Willow exclaimed, wringing her hands in front of her. “The limo as supposed to pick up Faith, then Buffy, and then me, but it never came. I waited for an hour, before getting my dad to drop me off, but she’s not here either.”

 

“Maybe something Slayery happened.” Cordelia suggested dispassionately.

 

Willow barely spared her a glance. “What if she’s in danger?”

 

“Well, Faith’s with her.” Xander pointed out. “I seriously doubt that we could do anything that Faith couldn’t do.”

 

“Oh, what if something got both of them?” Willow practically wailed.

 

“Then we’re screwed.” Cordelia pointed out. “And we might as well enjoy our last night on earth dancing and watching me be crowned Homecoming Queen.”

 

Willow glared at her. “You just don’t care about anything other than yourself, do you? Buffy and Faith could be in danger!”

 

“And what are you going to do?” Cordelia asked, her arms crossed over her chest. “Run after them and then force them to rescue you?”

 

“At least I would be doing something. Buffy was right, you are a...a...v-vapid wh-whore.” Willow spat.

 

“Ooh, Willow said a bad word.” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Honestly, if you’re going to be a bitch at least don’t stutter about it. Come on, Xander, let’s dance.”

 

Xander tried to ignore Willow’s betrayed expression as he allowed Cordelia to pull him towards the dance floor. “Shouldn’t we at least tell Giles or something?”

 

Cordelia stopped and turned to face him. “Isn’t he back at school? If I miss out on my coronation because of this…”

 

“You won’t,” Xander promised her. “We can get there and back in less than fifteen minutes and the coronation isn’t for another half an hour. They’re still counting the votes.”

 

“Fine.” Cordelia conceded, beginning to stalk her way towards the door. “Couldn’t we have just told Willow to do this? She’s the one who's all upset.”

 

“Willow doesn't have a car.” Xander pointed out. “Besides, this way, if there really is something wrong, nobody will be able to accuse you of not having cared enough to do anything.”

 

Cordelia stopped and pulled him around so that she kiss him. “Xander Harris, the most Slytherin of all the Slytherins.”

 

It took a few more minutes than expected to get to the library doors, mostly because Xander couldn't find the motivation to stop Cordelia from kissing him, but they got there just in time to see a female vampire loading one of the crossbows that Giles kept in the weapons stash and point it in the direction of the second vampire in the room. Giles’ was lying unconscious (and hopefully not dead) on the floor.

 

“Crap!” Cordelia exclaimed. “Now I’m really going to miss my coronation!”

 

The female vampire jumped in surprise and the crossbow fired it’s wooden bolt. 

 

“Candy!” The other vampire exclaimed in horror, before exploding into dust.

 

“Lyle!” Candy wailed in horror. “No! I didn’t mean to.”

 

Xander exchanged a glance with Cordy, before the both began to try and creep quietly out of the room. Sure, one vampire was better than two, but they hadn’t even managed to stake half the vampires they came up against when Oz and Willow were helping.

 

Unfortunately, Candy’s grief didn’t distract her for long and she spun towards them just as Cordelia was pushing the door open. “Slayer! You made me kill Lyle!”

 

Cordelia shook her head, eyes wide. “Uh, no! No slayers here. We’re just high school students.”

 

“I’m going to kill you for that!” Candy growled, chucking the crossbow away and stalking towards them. 

 

“Run!” Xander instructed Cordelia, stepping forward so that he was between her and the vampire.

 

“And what?” Cordelia snapped. “Leave you to die? You distract her, I’ll get to the crossbow.”

 

“So, this Lyle,” Xander started. “Was he your boyfriend or something? Because you seem to be awfully broken up over the death of an ugly, soulless, monster.”

 

“He was my husband!” Candy growled, her yellow eyes narrowing on him, before she switched her attention to Cordelia who had started edging around her.

 

Clearly a more physical distraction was required, so Xander leapt towards Candy with a battle cry and felt some satisfaction when she was forced back a step. Of course, that then left him way too close to vampire that he had no ability to fight - but at least it had given Cordy the distraction she needed to sneak around them.

 

“You killed my husband!” Candy roared, as she grabbed Xander’s shoulders and slammed her  head into his.

 

The collision hurt like hell, and Xander could feel his legs starting to collapse beneath him. “A-actually,” He stuttered, trying to blink away the stars. “That was you.”

 

Candy roared again and hauled him up by the shoulders, so that his neck was near her teeth.

 

“Bitch!” Cordelia’s voice snapped suddenly, and seconds later Candy exploded into dust.

 

Xander collapsed on the floor and blinked blearily up at Cordelia who was standing poised behind where Candy had been - a stake in her hand.

 

“Xander!” Cordelia dropped the stake and fell to her knees beside him. “Are you alright?”

 

“Um,” Xander raised a hand to his hand and felt for blood. “I think so?”

 

“I think Giles is still out of it.” Cordelia said, glancing behind her. “But he’s still breathing.”

 

“Good.” Xander said, attempting to pull himself upright. “Oh, boy.”

 

“What?” Cordelia asked worriedly. 

 

“I really don’t want to vomit on your dress.” Xander admitted. “You should go. They’ll be announcing the homecoming queen soon.”

 

Cordelia glanced towards the door, before turning her attention back to Xander. “Not without you. Can I get you anything? Water? Ice? Something to vomit into?”

 

Xander groaned. “Some ice would be good. Giles probably needs some too.”

 

“I’ll be back.” Cordelia promised, pushing herself to his feet.

 

Xander closed his eyes and tried not to focus on the fact that his head felt as though it was going to explode.

 

“Here.” Cordelia’s voice interrupted his headache, just as something cold gently touched his forehead.

 

Xander groaned. “Oww.”

 

“Sorry.” Cordelia said quickly, and cold disappeared.

 

“No, it’s fine.” Xander opened his eyes and took the cold pack from her before gently applying it to his head. “You should go check on Giles.” He forced himself into an upright position, moving slightly so he could lean against a wall, and tried to ignore his nausea. “I have no idea how Buffy does that so often. She head butts people all the time.”

 

“I think it’s different when you’re the one being headbutted.” Cordelia pointed out. “Giles? Are you alright?”

 

“Mmm?” Giles moaned, before lifting his head slightly. “Ow, what happened?”

 

“You were knocked out by vampires.” Cordelia told him. “They’re gone now though.”

 

“Buffy?” Giles asked.

 

“No, me and Xander actually.” Cordelia corrected him. “What? I’m serious.”

 

“My apologies.” Giles told her, pushing himself upright. “I was merely surprised.”

 

“We don’t know where Buffy is.” Xander told Giles, the cold pack still pressed against his face. “That’s what we came here to tell you. She and Faith never turned up at the dance.”

 

Giles climbed to his feet. “Oh, dear.”

 

“What should we do?” Xander asked, using the wall to help him stand up.

 

“I’m not sure.” Giles admitted.

 

“Well, I, for one, think that we should go back to the dance.” Cordelia put in. “If we hurry we might make it to my coronation.”

 

Xander glanced towards Giles to see if he had any objections before agreeing. “Sounds good. But you should probably drive.”

 

It took them less than five minutes to get back to the Bronze and Xander couldn’t help but be relieved when he realised that the coronation hadn’t happened yet. He would have hated for Cordy to have had to miss it. 

 

“I can’t believe it!” Cordelia breathed. “They’re here!”

 

“Who?”

 

“Buffy and Faith!”

 

Xander looked towards where she was glaring and frowned when he saw them dancing together. “Oh. Oww, note to self, frowning is bad.”

 

Cordelia looked at him in concern. “How’s your head?”

 

“Well, I don’t feel like throwing up all over your shoes anymore.” Xander commented. “But let’s just say that I’m looking forward to the quiet, darkness of bedtime.”

 

“I don’t think you’re supposed to sleep after being hit on the head.” Cordelia commented. “Maybe I should stay with you tonight.”

 

“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” Xander started. “But that probably isn’t a good idea. You look amazing in that dress and, if you stay over, well, let’s just say that I’m going to want to do more than just make out with you.”

 

“You’re such a gentleman.” Cordelia told him fondly. “Uh oh, Willow alert.”

 

“Where were you guys?!” Willow asked, as she and Oz approached them. “Buffy and Faith arrived. I was right, they did get in trouble. Apparently they were stuck in the forest being hunted by demons and stuff, but they killed most of them and then came here.”

 

“But clearly they didn’t need your help.” Cordelia pointed out. 

 

“Well, no.” Willow admitted. “But still. What happened to your face, Xander?”

 

Xander brought a hand to his forehead and winced. “What’s wrong with my face? Cordy, you said there was no blood!”

 

“No blood.” Willow assured him. “Just swelling and bruising.”

 

“Oh,” Xander grimaced. “We went to tell Giles that Buffy and Faith were missing, but there were two vampires there. I got head butted.”

 

“Oh, we need to tell Buffy!” Willow exclaimed.

 

“Why?” Cordelia asked.

 

“So she can stake them!” Willow turned towards Oz. “You should go get Buffy.”

 

“They already dust, Wil.” Xander told her tiredly.

 

“What?” Willow looked between them in confusion. “How?”

 

“Dustpile one, accidently staked dustpile two, and then Cordy staked dustpile one.” Xander explained simply.

 

“Xander distracted her.” Cordy added. “That’s how he got hurt.”

 

“Oh,” Willow didn’t seem to know what to do with that information. 

 

“Good job.” Oz told them with a nod. “Is Giles alright?”

 

“He’s got a sore head.” Xander told him. “But he’s fine. He’s waiting in the library in case Buffy comes back and needs him.”

 

Willow winced. “Oh, I should go tell her that.”

 

“Yeah,” Cordelia agreed. “You go do that.” 

 

The Homecoming Queen Coronation was announced by Devon a few minutes later and Xander tried not to feel too smug when Cordelia won by a landslide. That was his Cordy - she never did things in halves.

 

Buffy, who was looking a little worse than wear, looked completely devastated at the news, but Xander wasn’t sure why she was so surprised. The Homecoming Queen election was basically a popularity contest and three days of campaigning couldn’t make up for the fact that Buffy wasn’t exactly popular. She wasn’t entirely unpopular either, not like Xander, Jesse, and Willow had been, but most people knew her has the weird girl who got kicked out of school - not exactly homecoming queen material.

 

“Thank you!” Cordelia said into the microphone, as Devon placed the tiara on her head and Buffy stalked out of the Bronze. “It is an honour to have been elected as your Homecoming Queen....”

 

5-5-5

 

Vampires were real. Vampires were real, and so were demons, and magic, and...Tony was pretty sure he was going insane. Except every time he managed to convince himself of that, JARVIS would show him one of the hundreds of videos that the AI had found on the internet that proved the existence of ‘things that go bump in the night’ - as Xander had put it.

 

The problem with vampires, demons, and magic existing wasn’t just that it meant Tony had to throw pretty much his entire worldview out and start from scratch, but that Xander was in even more danger than Tony had ever imagined he would be. From what Xander had told him, and what JARVIS had uncovered, living Xander’s life was ten times more dangerous that being a Stark had ever been.

 

The worst thing was the helplessness. If Xander had been in danger from kidnappers, Tony could have hired a team of bodyguards to protect him, but there was nothing he could do against vampires. He’d considered hiring a team of bodyguards anyway, one that was made up of people who could kill vampires and demons, but Xander had shot that idea down. Apparently his friend Buffy was the best kind of protection Xander could have - Tony wasn’t convinced. And not just because she sounded kind of flaky. 

 

Tony wasn’t sure what to do. A week ago, his biggest worry had been how to get Xander to agree to move out of home and away from his abusive parents, but now that Xander had decided to move into the mansion Tony was going to worry even more. His son was going to be sharing the house with a vampire - a vampire! 

 

He’d told the world he was done with building weapons, and he was never again going to build weapons to sell - even if that meant the end of his friendship with Rhodey (which seemed to be the case) - but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to build his son the best weapons for fighting vampires, demons, and magic, that anyone had ever come up with. 

 

But for him to do that, he needed to know more about magic, and that meant working with JARVIS to build a comprehensive database of every bit of information that the internet held on the subject. Thank goodness JARVIS kept anyone from being able to stalk his movements on the internet. If anyone saw what he was doing they’d probably think he was crazy!

 

How was this his life now?


	7. ConfrontatION

“That’s quite the shiner you’ve got there.”

Xander raised a hand towards his eye subconsciously as he took in the man in front of him. “Uh, yes, sir.”

“Don’t call me sir. My name’s David. I’m the guy your dad has hired to teach you how to fight.” David said, sticking out a hand.

Xander reached out and clasped his hand. “Xander.”

“Good to meet you.” David nodded, before nodding towards Xander’s eye. “So, how’d that happen?”

“I got headbutted.” Xander admitted. “It was Homecoming and tensions were running kind of high. I guess I said the wrong thing to the wrong guy.”

“Wow,” David looked impressed. “That’s one hell of a head butt. This kind of thing happen a lot around here? Your dad wasn’t exactly clear on why you need to learn to fight.”

Xander frowned. “You, uh, know about Tony?”

“It would have been pretty hard for him to have hired me without it.” David pointed out. “But don’t worry. I think the non-disclosure agreement that he gave me to sign was longer than the one I signed for the marines. I won’t be telling anyone.”

“Thanks.” Xander said, smiling in relief. “It’s all kind of new.”

 

“Fair enough.” David nodded. “So, you want to tell me why exactly you need to learn to fight? Or would that take another non-disclosure agreement?”

 

Xander shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. “I just need to be able to defend myself.”

 

“So your dad and Harry said.” David told him, before shrugging off his jacket. “Alright, before we start, there’s something I need to say. I’m being paid to be here, which means that I’ll show up for two hours, three times a week, and do my best to teach you to fight. That said, how much you learn? Completely up to you. Learning to fight is hard and painful, and only you can decide if you really want to commit. Either way, I’ll still be here every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday because your dad is paying me a crapload of money.”

 

Xander bit his tongue to stop himself from making a smart comment and nodded. “Got it.”

 

Xander hadn’t known what to expect from his first training session, but it certainly hadn’t been being made to run until he physically couldn’t run anymore and then going through the same thing with a bunch of pushups, situps and other exercises. According to David, who was a lot more of a hardass than he had seemed at first - the first step to learning to fight was to get fit and so Xander would have to run through the exercises every single day. 

 

It wasn’t going to be fun, but then it didn’t need to be. Xander wasn’t learning to fight for the enjoyment factor. He was learning because he wanted to be able to be more useful in the fight against evil (and because he didn’t want to end up dead one day). So, he could push through the pain and exhaustion for while, and then it would get easier - right? 

 

Getting up the morning after his first session with David was one of the most painful things Xander have ever done. Everything hurt! And the idea that he was supposed to go for a run and do exercises, was almost enough to keep him in bed. He limped and groaned through his morning exercises, and then continued to limp and groan through school.

 

As though the pain in his muscles wasn’t enough to make his day hard, Buffy still hadn’t gotten over the fact that Cordelia had been elected Homecoming Queen, and she was apparently still mad that Xander had picked his girlfriend over her. Meanwhile, Willow had started staring at Xander when she thought no one was looking. It was creepy, and it reminded him of their sophomore year when Willow had been crushing on him and he’d been trying to ignore it. But things had changed now, Xander had Cordelia, and Willow had Oz. Xander had no idea what Willow was thinking. Why would she be willing to risk damaging her relationship with Oz when Xander had made it clear that he wasn’t interested?

 

So, between Buffy’s glares and Willow’s stares, it was easier just to avoid spending time with Buffy and Willow. A plan that Cordelia supported one hundred percent. Instead, when they weren’t studying for their SATs, they spent their time at school with some of Cordelia’s friends, and spent their time away from school hanging out with Faith.

 

“I don’t know why you’re even bothering.” Faith commented the afternoon before their SATs, while they were sitting under a big tree at Radcliff Park. “What’s the point of taking some stupid ass exam if you’re not planning on going to college? Hell, what’s the point of attending school if you’re just going to get a job afterwards?”

 

“You mean aside from not having to get a job for a whole year? Or getting to see friends everyday?” Cordelia replied archly, examining her nails. “Besides, I am planning on going to college.”

 

“You might be.” Faith agreed, from where she was lying under the tree. “But X over there isn’t. Why’s he taking it?”

 

Xander let his head fall back against the tree he was leaning against. “I don’t know...”

 

“Xander’s taking three AP classes and getting As.” Cordelia interrupted him. “He only thinks he’s not going to college.”

 

“Hey!” Xander protested.

 

“Wow,” Faith looked Xander over, as though seeing him through new eyes. “I had no idea you were so smart, X. Who would have thought, Red’s brain in much better looking package.

 

“Willow’s way smarter than me.” Xander argued. 

 

Cordelia scoffed. “She wishes.”

 

“So why don’t want to go to college?” Faith asked.

 

“Harris’ don’t go to college. We deliver pizza and sell hotdogs.”

 

“Yeah, but it’s not like you’re really a Harris.” Cordelia pointed out.

 

Faith raised an eyebrow. “He’s not?”

 

Xander shot Cordelia a frustrated look. “Great secret keeping skills there, Cordy.”

 

“Sorry.” Cordelia said, though she didn’t look very apologetic at all.

 

Xander sighed, before turning to Faith. “I found out that my dad isn’t actually my dad a few months ago.”

 

“I used to wish that my dad wasn’t really related to me.” Faith admitted with a shrug. “But then, I used to wish the same thing about my mum too, actually. So what’s this new dad of yours like?”

 

“He’s great.” Xander grinned. “He’s the one who bought me the car actually.”

 

“So he’s loaded then.” Faith commented. 

 

“More loaded than I can imagine anyone ever being.” Xander agreed. 

 

Faith looked impressed. “Which, given that you’re dating Richie Rich over there, is actually saying something. So, is he a famous rich guy, or a not famous rich guy? Would I have heard of him?”

 

Xander weighed up his options for a few seconds. “Tony Stark.”

 

“Holy crap.” Faith exclaimed, bolting up into a sitting position. “You’re kidding, right?”

 

“Nope, no kidding here.” Xander replied.

 

“You’re actually Iron Man’s kid? That’s awesome!”

 

Xander nodded. “And sort of unbelievable. Part of me still wonders whether this is all big dream.”

 

“So, why don’t you want to go to college?” Faith asked curiously. “You’ve clearly got the brains, and the cash to pay for it. Or it least Daddy Warbucks has.”

 

Xander shrugged. “Why don’t you want to go to college?”

 

“Well, to start, I haven’t got the brains or the cash.” Faith pointed out. “I wasn’t like Buffy, with a perfect, little life before becoming the Slayer came along and ruined it all. My life was crappy - becoming the Slayer was the best thing that ever happened to me. Not to mention that I’ll probably be dead before people my age are going to college anyway.”

 

“What?” Xander frowned. “No, you won’t.”

 

Faith shrugged uncaringly. “Face it. The longest surviving slayer in history only lasted nine years, most slayers don’t last any longer than one or two. Maybe I’ll make it longer, maybe I won’t, either way I’ll be dead long before college will be any use to me. I figure I might as well enjoy the time I’ve got.”

 

“That’s so depressing!” Cordelia looked horrified. “Don’t you want to live longer than that?”

 

“Sure I do.” Faith admitted. “But what am I going to do? Get to fifty and still be fighting vampires? Eventually a vampires going to get lucky, and I’m going to get dead. There’s no point getting all upset about it.”

 

Xander’s stomach twisted. “I’d never thought about it like that. Buffy never talks about that kind of thing.”

 

“Yeah, well, B’s kidding herself.” Faith looked away. “And I get it, I do, she’s got a cozy little life and doesn’t want anything mucking it up. She’s got a mom, a great watcher, you guys. It’s probably the reason she’s lasted so long. I mean, the way I hear it, she’d already be dead if it wasn’t for you guys. Isn’t that why I was called or whatever?”

 

“You’ve got us to.” Xander promised her. “I promise, if you go running off into the pipes to face a big bad vampire that’s been prophesied to kill you - I’ll come after you and give you CPR too.”

 

Faith snorted. “You know, I actually believe you would. You’ve got bigger balls than most guys, that’s for sure.” She flashed a grin. “So, why haven’t I heard about Daddy Warbucks before? I would have thought it would have been big news.”

 

“You and Cordy are the only ones who know about it.” Xander answered. “I haven’t even told Willow and Buffy, so you can’t tell anyone.”

 

“Angel knows too.” Cordelia reminded him. “You said that he overheard you talking with Tony.”

 

“Wait, Angel?” Faith asked. “Like, Angel Angel? The vamp who boinked Buffy, turned evil, and tried to end the world? That Angel?”

 

“The one and only.” Xander nodded.

 

“But isn’t he supposed to be dead or something?”

 

“He’s back.” Xander told her. “But not like in an ending the world kind of way, more in feeling sorry for himself, recovering from hell kind of way.”

 

“What Xander’s trying to say is that he’s got a soul again.” Cordelia told Faith. “So he’s harmless.”

 

“At least until someone gives him another happy.” Xander muttered. 

 

“So wait, there’s this vamp in town and you’re just okay with that?” Faith asked incredulously.

 

“Eh, it’s Angel.” Cordelia shrugged. “He’s like a big, brooding teddybear when he’s got his soul.”

 

“He’s a vamp!”

 

“Yeah, that was sort of my line too when he first came around.” Xander agreed. “And then again when I found out he was back. But Cordy had a good point.”

 

Faith looked unimpressed. “Which was?”

 

“That we don’t kill vampires because they’re a different species, we kill them because they’re evil.” Cordelia explained primly. “Otherwise we’re committing ethnic genocide.”

 

“And because Angel isn’t evil, we shouldn’t kill him.” Faith tilted her head back and forth. “Yeah, I get that. Doesn’t mean I have to like him though, right?”

 

“Definitely not.” Xander shook his firmly. “In fact, you can join the ‘we hate Angel’ club if you like.”

 

Cordelia scoffed. “Says the guy who lives with him.”

 

“I do not live with him!” Xander protested, turning to Faith. “Really, I don’t. I live on the top floor, he lives on the bottom floor - we hardly interact!”

 

Faith frowned. “I thought you lived with your folks?”

 

“Tony bought him a mansion.” Cordelia explained. 

 

Faith laughed. “You’re just a big bag of secrets, aren’t you.”

 

“Secrets that you really shouldn’t share.” Xander said. “Buffy’s the only one who knows that Angel’s back, and she doesn’t know that we know.”

 

Faith’s eyes widened. “She didn’t even tell Giles? Man, I thought they were tight.”

 

6-6-6

 

The SATs went way better than Xander had been expecting them to go (especially given that he’d spent the night before them in the library researching why the Band Candy was making all the adults act like teenagers). Despite how well they had gone, or perhaps because of it, Xander was pretty sure that he’d done terribly, but at least they were over.

 

He was still running every morning, and the pain in his muscles wasn’t getting better. It seemed as though every time Xander’s muscles were starting to forgive him a little it was time for another training with David who, while sympathetic to his pain, had no problem making Xander go through it all over again.

 

Cordelia seemed to find the whole thing both amusing and admirable, and the backrubs that she rewarded Xander with were absolutely amazing. She’d even started running with him, though she stopped for a break about a quarter of the way through Xander’s run and then joined him when he passed her again on his way back. It was nice to share another part of his life with her, especially now that his interactions with Willow and Buffy were more stilted than they’d ever been before.

 

About a week after the test, Xander and Cordelia took Faith to see the Crawford Street Mansion and to meet Angel (but only after Faith agreed to not try and kill him). Xander wasn’t sure how exactly he had become the defender of Angel, but he knew that it probably wasn’t a great look on him - it felt unnatural and weird.

 

“It’s kind of crappy looking.” Faith commented, staring up at the front of the mansion.

 

Xander nodded. “That it is.”

 

“I’ve got to say, I’m kind of disappointed.” Faith admitted. “I expected more from Daddy Warbucks.”

 

“This way anyone who sees me going in with just think I’m trespassing in an abandoned building.” Xander explained. “The inside is way better.”

 

“The second floor is.” Cordelia agreed. “The bit where Angel lives is still pretty crappy.”

 

“Angel, the vampire with a soul.” Faith shook her head. “Man, I still can’t get my head around that.”

 

“I know how you feel.” Xander commiserated, as they entered the front courtyard. “Actually, so does Buffy. She totally freaked when she kissed Angel and his gameface appeared.”

 

“That’s how she found out?” Faith asked. “I think I would have staked him.”

 

“That came later.” Xander grinned.

 

“And she still boinked him?” Faith asked in amazement.

 

“That came much later.”

 

They moved through the courtyard and Xander pushed open the curtain before freezing. 

 

What the hell were Buffy and Angel thinking? The last time they had gotten cozy with each other Angel had lost his soul. They couldn’t seriously be stupid enough to be starting that up again could they?

 

“What’s happening?” Faith asked, tugging the curtain out of Xander’s hands so she could see too.

 

Buffy and Angel broke apart with horrified expressions.

 

“Xander?” Buffy asked in disbelief. “Faith?”

 

Xander turned on his heel and strode away - not caring that Buffy was calling after him. There was no way he could deal with talking to Buffy right now - he’d probably take her by the shoulders and try and shake some sense into her. Not to mention that he couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t give away the fact that he’d known that Angel was back.

 

“Xander, wait up!” Cordelia called, as Xander strode down the street towards his car. 

 

Xander slowed down to allow her to catch up. 

 

“So, I take it that you didn’t know that they were getting it on?” Faith asked, as she and Cordelia fell into step beside him. 

 

Xander chuckled darkly. “Nope.”

 

“They were what?!” Cordelia exclaimed, as they reached Xander’s car. “I can’t believe her! We’ve been down this track before, what does she think is going to happen?”

 

“Xander!”

 

Xander turned around and leant against his car as Buffy ran towards him. “Buffy.”

 

“You can’t tell anyone.” Buffy said, when she reached him. “Giles doesn’t know. He wouldn’t understand.”

 

Xander gave her an incredulous look. “Understand what? That Angel’s miraculously come back from hell? That you were kissing him, even though you know what will happen? That you’ve apparently gone crazy?!

 

Buffy took a step back. “Okay, that was harsh.”

 

“You want harsh?” Cordelia started towards her angrily. “How about the fact that you see to care more about getting laid than the fate of the world?”

 

Buffy’s expression closed off. “How dare you! You have no idea what I’ve been through, what Angel’s been through!

 

“Maybe not,” Cordelia admitted. “But I know what I went through, when Angel was running around killing and torturing your friends. He killed Miss Calendar!”

 

“I know that!” Buffy clenched her fists. “But he’s better now!”

 

“Yeah?” Faith asked. “How much longer do you think he’s going to stay that way with you grinding yourself against him like that?”

 

Buffy turned towards her with a snarl. “Like you can talk. You know what Cordy called you the first night we met you? Slut-o-rama.”

 

Faith shrugged uncaringly. “Sounds fair. At least the guys I get it on with are actually alive!”

 

“What are you even doing here?” Buffy asked desperately, turning towards Xander. “What are any of you doing here?”

 

“Faith wanted to see the mansion.” Xander explained simply. “So we offered to give her a tour.”

 

“A tour?” Buffy laughed darkly. “Oh, that’s great. What were you going to say? ‘Here’s where Buffy had to drive a sword through the man she loved to save the world?’”

 

“How about, ‘here’s where Giles got tortured for hours by Angel?!” Xander returned, before turning away from her. “Either you tell Giles, or I will. I’m not just going to sit back and let history repeat itself again.”

 

“What history?” Buffy asked desperately. “Nothing’s happening between us. So we kissed, it was a mistake, it won’t happen again.”

 

“So tell Giles.” Xander said simply, getting into his car and turning the key in the ignition. “If nothing’s happening, you’ve got nothing to be ashamed of. Either way, Giles deserves to know that the guy who tortured him and killed his girlfriend is back in town.”

 

6-6-6

 

“Can you believe it?”

 

Xander looked up from his locker at where Willow was bouncing in place. “Believe what?”

 

“Angel’s back!” Willow exclaimed. “Buffy said she found him in the woods a few weeks ago, but he’s all better now. Soul reattached and everything.”

 

Xander shut his locker, before leaning against it. “Why do you look as though you think this is a good thing? Shouldn’t you be mad at her for keeping secrets, sheltering a killer, and all that?”

 

“Giles is furious.” Willow told him. “He even yelled at her. He was actually kind of mean.”

 

“Buffy’s been hiding the guy who killed his girlfriend.” Xander pointed out. “Last time she and Angel got it on he went all serial killer on us.”

 

“Well, yeah.” Willow shrugged. “But Buffy swears that there’s nothing going on with her and Angel anymore.”

 

“Cordy, Faith, and I walked in on them making out!” Xander exclaimed. “Or didn’t she tell you that part?”

 

“She swears it was a mistake.” Willow explained. “Buffy’s smarter than that. She knows what would happen if anything, well, happened.” 

 

Xander snorted. “Yeah, because Buffy’s got such a great history of making smart decisions when her emotions are involved.”

 

Willow glared at him. “What is wrong with you? You’re so petty, and mean, and Cordelia-like! Clearly you have been spending way too much time with her.”

 

“Maybe I’m just sick of being screwed over by my friend and then being expected to forget about it because she’s the slayer.” Xander retorted. “Buffy’s human, just like the rest of us, she makes mistakes.”

 

“Exactly!” Willow snapped frustratedly. “We  _ all  _ make mistakes. Why are you always harping on and on about Buffy’s?”

 

“Because she never says sorry!” Xander exploded, before wincing when the people around them paused their conversations to stare at him. “She makes all these mistakes, screws us over, and then refuses to admit that she was wrong.”

 

Willow frowned. “What are you talking about? Buffy apologised for running away.”

 

“Not to me.” Xander told her, his stomach sinking. “Apparently I just wasn’t worth the effort.”

 

Willow reached out to lay a hand on his arm. “I’m sure that’s not true.”

 

Xander stared at her hand for a moment, before shaking it off uncomfortably. “Yeah? Well, when you tell Buffy all about this conversation, you can tell her that I’m still waiting for my apology.”

 

6-6-6

 

“I can’t believe you!”

 

Xander looked up from his Physics book and sighed at the sight of a furious Buffy. “Let’s take this outside.”

 

Buffy glanced towards where Cordelia was practising with the cheerleaders. “Why are you even here?”

 

“It gives me a chance to work on my homework.” Xander commented, stuffing his book into his bag and standing up. “Besides, I’m supporting Cordelia.”

 

Buffy grimaced, before looking pointedly at where Cordelia was yelling at Charlotte for having screwed up the routine. “Yeah, cos Cordelia is definitely the one who needs support.”

 

Xander ignored her as he led the way outside and leant against the wall expectantly. “Go ahead.”

 

Buffy expression immediately twisted angrily. “How dare you! You have no idea what I went through! How dare you think that I somehow owe you anything! Who do you think you are, my mother? Giles?”

 

Xander crossed his arms. “You apologised to Willow.”

 

“Willow’s my best friend!” Buffy snapped. “And Willow hasn’t been running around judging every decision I make.”

 

“I’m your friend too!” Xander snapped. “Maybe not your best friend, since I don’t really have one of those. I don’t know whether you remember, but my best friend was turned into a vampire and I had to stake him. So you don’t you dare tell me that I don’t know what you went through. I’d known Jesse my whole life and I had to stake him!”

 

“Oh, poor Xander!” Buffy sneered. “I loved Angel!”

 

“And I loved Jesse!” Xander exclaimed. “Not in a ‘screw his soul out’ kind of way, but that doesn’t mean that it hurt any less when I killed him.”

 

Buffy spread out her hands. “So what?! Because you to stake your friend, I’m not allowed to be upset that I sent the man that I love to hell?”

 

“No,” Xander denied. “It just means that you don’t get to run away for three months, leave us all in danger, and then come back as though you didn’t have a choice. You had a choice, Buffy. You just chose badly.”

 

“So maybe I did.” Buffy shrugged. “So what? What the hell does it have to do with you?”

 

“We thought you were dead!” Xander exploded. “We spent three months with a present tense rule, because we thought you were dead but weren’t willing to admit it. We went out and fought vampires, without the slayer, and I can’t count the number of times we almost got killed. So you know what, it did affect us and, as your friends, we deserved something other than a joke about us not being worthy to wield a stake.”

 

“But I didn’t make you do any of that!” Buffy said desperately. “I didn’t make you think I was dead, I didn’t make you go out and fight vampires.”

 

“Well, you certainly didn’t give us any reason to think you were alive.” Xander pointed out. “And what did you think we were going to do? Just let the vampires kill people without trying to stop them?”

 

Buffy looked away. “So I was wrong. I shouldn’t have run I away, I know that now. Why is it so important that I say it over and over again? Can’t we just move on?”

 

Xander sighed tiredly as he shoved his hands into his pockets. ‘We have moved on, Buffy. I shouldn’t have even said anything to Willow. I was angry, and I said something I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.”

 

“But we haven’t moved on.” Buffy pinched her lips together. “You’re still mad at me.”

 

“I’m mad at you for making out with Angel.” Xander agreed. “Not for running away. I forgave you for that weeks ago.”

 

Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. “Well, it sure doesn’t feel like it. Everything’s different now. Willow and I miss you.”

 

“I’m right here.” Xander reminded her. 

 

“You spend more time with Cordelia and Faith than you do us.” Buffy retorted. 

 

“You and Willow were the ones who choose not to invite us to things.” Xander pointed out. “You think I don’t know about all the movie nights you, Willow, and Oz have?”

 

Buffy stared down at her feet. “Oh.”

 

“What was I supposed to do?” Xander asked. “Wait by the phone for my invitation?”

 

“It’s not you.” Buffy assured him quickly. “It’s just Cordy…”

 

Xander could feel his face tightening. “Cordy is my girlfriend.”

 

“And we’re your friends!” Buffy protested. 

 

Xander took a deep breath. “You know, I really hated Angel when you started dating him.”

 

Buffy rolled her eyes. “I know.”

 

“I couldn’t understand why you would choose him over us, your friends.” Xander continued. “I get it now. You loved him. I’m sorry for hassling you about him so much.”

 

Buffy’s mouth dropped open. “W-what?”

 

“I didn’t like him.” Xander told her. “Still don’t, but I shouldn’t have tried to make you break up with him. It wasn’t as though he was hurting you or anything.”

 

Buffy stared at him for a few seconds before answering. “I get it. You’re trying to say that me and Willow not liking Cordelia is the same as when you didn’t like Angel.”

 

“Well, aside from the fact that she’s not going to lose her soul and kill people we know if we ever...you know.”

 

Buffy raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, right, like I’m going to believe that Cordy isn’t putting out. Why else would you be panting after her?”

 

Xander pushed himself off the wall and turned back to the gym. “And we’re done.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Buffy said quickly. “That was uncalled for.”

 

Xander turned back slowly. “It was.”

 

Buffy shuffled her feet uncomfortably. “So you and Cordelia are really serious?”

 

“I love her.” Xander told her seriously.

 

Buffy’s face twisted into a grimace, before quickly flattening out. “Really? That’s, uh, great.”

 

Xander rolled his eyes. “Very believable.”

 

“Sorry.” Buffy shrugged. “I’ll talk to Willow. See if we can’t calm down the anti-Cordelia rhetoric.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Buffy shrugged uncomfortably. “So, are we good?”

 

“Are you still making out with Angel?” Xander asked.

 

Buffy’s jaw clenched. “What happened to you being sorry for hassling me?”

 

“I’m sorry for hassling you when I didn’t know he was a threat.” Xander told her. “But we all know how this story ends now.”

 

Buffy deflated. “Nothing’s happening between us. I swear. We both know the risks and we’re just friends.”

 

Xander was still sceptical. “It didn’t look like you were  _ just _ friends yesterday.”

 

“It was a mistake.” Buffy sighed. “It won’t happen again. I just go to take him some blood.”

 

“Maybe I could do that.” Xander suggested, without thinking

 

Buffy stared incredulously at him. “What? Why?”

 

Xander blanched. “Uh, you know, to make things easier for you. To remove temptation and all that. Besides, I’m sure you’ve got a lot on your hands at the moment and…”

 

“And you wouldn’t try and hurt him?” Buffy asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

 

“Of course not.” Xander told her. “I’m not going to say that I haven’t been tempted, but ethnic genocide, you know?”

 

Buffy shook her head. “Not really.”

 

6-6-6

 

“Do you think they have a book for this sort of thing?” Cordelia asked, with an amused smirk.

 

Xander blinked in confusion. “What sort of thing?”

 

“Care and Feeding of Vampires.” Cordelia laughed, as she sipped at her coffee.

 

“Oh, har har.” Xander rubbed his face. “I don’t know what I was thinking?”

 

“That it will give you an excuse to be seen going into the mansion?” Cordelia suggested. “That it will decrease the chances of you running into Buffy there?”

 

“Yeah, let’s go with that.” Xander agreed. “I suppose the good news is that Buffy and I have made up.”

 

Cordelia sniffed haughtily. “Is that really good news?”

 

“Yes.” Xander told her firmly. “She and Willow are two of my best friends. Besides, she and Willow are going to stop bitching about you.”

 

“Like I care what they’re saying about me.” Cordelia said disdainfully. 

 

“Well, I do.” Xander told her. “I love you. My friends shouldn’t be bad mouthing you.”

 

The corners of Cordelia’s mouth turned up. “I love you too.”

 

“Yuck.” Faith commented, dropping down onto the third seat at their cafe table. “You guys are disgusting.”

 

“Jealous, much?” Cordelia asked, as Xander nudged Faith’s coffee across the table.

 

“Of you?” Faith eyed Xander as she ran her tongue over her top lip. “Hell, yes.”

 

Xander shifted uncomfortably. “Uh…”

 

Faith laughed and leaned back in her chair. “You’re too easy, X.”

 

Cordelia eyed Xander  proprietorially. “He better not be.”

 

Faith laughed again. “So, whatcha talking about?”

 

“Xander’s made up with Buffy.” Cordelia sounded disappointed. “And he’s agreed to be the one to deliver Angel his blood.”

 

“Makes sense.” Faith shrugged. “Better him than B. It’s not like he’s going end up boinking the vamp.”

 

“No,” Xander agreed with feeling. “Definitely not.”

 

“What else is new?” Faith asked. “Is Giles pissed?”

 

“Super pissed.” Cordelia told her.

 

“Pissier than we’ve ever seen him.” Xander agreed. “I give him a day.”

 

“To what? Take B over his knee?”

 

“To forgive her.” Xander corrected. “Giles never stays mad at Buffy for long.”

 

“Really?” Faith frowned. “Man, my watcher would have had my ass.”

 

Xander exchanged a glance with Cordelia. Faith didn’t mention her watcher very often.

 

“She was named Diana, right?” Cordelia asked.

 

Faith looked away. “Yeah. Professor Diana Dormer.”

 

“Professor?” 

 

“She was a Harvard Professor.” Faith explained. “Before she quit to come and babysit me.”

 

“How long were you with her?” Cordelia asked, uncharacteristically gently.

 

“Three months.” Faith shrugged. “She was my foster mom as well as my watcher. I thought she was whacked when she brought me home and started going on about vampires and slayers and all that crap.”

 

Xander chuckled. “Yeah, I thought Buffy and Giles were nuts when I first heard them talking about it.”

 

“Diana was great though.” Faith told them. “She was tougher than Giles, but she looked out for me.”

 

There was a long silence, before Cordy spoke. “Are you alright?”

 

“Five by five.” Faith said quickly, all emotion disappearing from her expression. 

 

“How are the Oz’s?” Xander asked curiously.

 

Faith frowned. “They want to get custody of me.”

 

“Wow,” Xander said. “That sounds great...right?”

 

“I guess?” Faith crossed her arms. “The last person to officially have guardianship of me is dead. Besides, it’s not like I really need another two people who think they can order me around. I’m going to be seventeen in less than two months.”

 

“Do the Oz’s order?” Xander asked curiously. “They really don’t seem like the ordering sort.”

 

“They haven’t yet.” Faith answered. “But people always change after the paperwork has gone through.”

 

“So have you said no?”

 

“I told them I’d think about it.” Faith answered. 

 

“And…?”

 

“And I don’t know.” Faith exploded, before glaring at the people who turned to stare at her. 

 

“Willow always makes me do a pros and cons list.” Xander said. “You could do one of those.”

 

“A what?” Faith frowned.

 

“Like, what would be the positives?” Xander asked.

 

“A place to stay.” Faith admitted. “And they seem pretty great. They’ve even been talking about ways they could get around me having to go to school.”

 

“Or you could come to school.” Cordelia pointed out. “It’s not like you wouldn’t know anyone.”

 

“It’s not the people I’m worried about not knowing.” Faith grumbled. “Besides, I’m the slayer. It’s not like I need to go to school.”

 

Xander frowned, he’d been thinking about that. “You’re also a girl. Being the slayer doesn’t make you not human.”

 

“What are some other positives?” Cordelia asked.

 

Faith looked away. “I don’t know. They’re alright, I guess.”

 

“Not to mention that you’d have some adults to back you up if you ever needed them to.” Xander pointed out. “Like if you ever got caught not going to school.”

 

Faith looked thoughtful, before shaking her head. “But if they don’t try and be all legal about it, then no one would even find out about me.”

 

“In a small town like Sunnydale?” Xander asked skeptically.

 

Faith looked between them. “You guys think I should do it.”

 

“Yeah.” Xander answered, even though it hadn’t been a question. “I mean, what’s the harm? It’s not like they’re going to start hitting you or anything. You’re the slayer. Besides, we’d stop them.”

 

Faith snorted. “I’d put them in the hospital if they so much as tried to take a swing at me.” Though her shoulders seemed to relax slightly.

 

“Besides,” Xander said. “I never realised it before this year, but having an adult look out for you is actually pretty great.”

 

6-6-6

 

Xander was surprised, and more than a little envious, at how quickly the process for the Oz’s to become Faith’s legal guardians went once she gave the go ahead. He wouldn’t have wanted Tony to do that with him, not if it would have meant moving schools and leaving Cordelia and his friends, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t wish that Tony had anyway. It was so confusing.

 

The only snag in the process for Faith and the Osbournes came when they realised that the only way for Faith not to go to school, was for her to be homeschooled. Tony had been sceptical about the idea when Xander had told him about it, (apparently getting permission for someone to be homeschool was a complicated process) but the Osbournes’ application had been approved within a week. 

 

Faith wasn’t exactly impressed that she would have to do schoolwork, (her rant on the subject easily rivalled Cordelia’s rants about Buffy) but she did agree in the end. At least it would give her something to do other than lie around all day waiting for vampires to come out at night.

 

Giles was even less impressed by the entire thing than Faith had been about being homeschooled. He had yelled at them all for doing something so stupid without asking his permission (which was blatantly unfair, since none of them had actually done anything), before storming over to the Oz’s to have it out with them. From what Faith reported the next day, having overheard most of the argument, Giles was worried that the Council might not like it.

 

Apparently the Oz’s found the idea of the Council’s interference just as weird and creepy as Xander did though, because they had ripped into Giles on the subject.  Faith had reported the entire incident with an odd mixture of glee and confusion - it was obvious that she’d never had adults back her up like that before.

 

Eventually all the fuss died down though and while Giles discussed the issue with the Council, all he would say about the matter was that he was dealing with it. He did seem uncommonly stressed and snappish for the next week though.

 

It was unfortunate timing really, since Xander, Cordelia and Faith were spending more time than they had been with Buffy, Willow and Oz and so were also spending an increased amount of time with the grumpy watcher. 

 

Buffy had apparently been sincere in her promise to back off the anti-Cordelia train and had pulled Willow along with her. It was nice to have things return to how they had been the previous year, with the five of them hanging out, plus Faith, but at the same time it made Xander realise how much things had changed. 

 

Buffy and Willow were still incredibly close, as were Willow and Oz, but Oz and Faith were friends now (presumably because they lived in the same house). Xander and Cordelia were a couple, of course, and they were both friends with Faith, who got along with Buffy, but not Willow (who was still jealous that Faith was living with the Osbournes). Xander was friends with everyone, but Willow was still staring at him at every opportunity and Oz had started giving Xander suspicious looks. While Cordelia only got along with Xander, Faith and Oz. It was like a complicated puzzle and it often made spending time together more awkward than anything.

 

And just when Xander didn’t think things could get any more complicated, a snooty British woman turned up claiming to have been sent to be Faith’s new watcher.

 

6-6-6

 

“...the Glove of Myhnegon, which is apparently this big deal. Thankfully, I accidently mentioned it to Angel and he knew where it was. So Cordy and I helped him destroy it. I can’t wait to see Post’s face when she finds out that we managed it without her. She was so horrible to Faith today. She’s such a bitch!” Xander ranted into his cellphone. “And Giles didn’t say anything! He was too busy sulking over the fact that they’d sent someone to replace him and getting defensive about his book collection.”

 

“What about the Oz’s?” Tony asked curiously. “Were they there?”

 

“No,” Xander sighed. “I don’t think anyone even considered inviting them. I wish we had, they seem pretty badass.”

 

“Badass hippies.” Tony sounded amused. “They sound like one of a kind.”

 

“Yeah,” Xander agreed. “You think the Oz’s might be able to help Faith?”

 

“That’s what guardians are for, isn’t it?” Tony asked. “It’s not like this council has any right over Faith, the Oz’s do.”

 

“Giles says they’re really powerful and that we shouldn’t piss them off.” Xander said. “Cordy and I went to see him after everyone had left to ask him to do something, but he was too scared of what the council might do.”

 

“You know who else is really powerful and shouldn't be pissed off?” Tony asked.

 

Xander grinned. “You?”

 

“Me.” Tony agreed. “And I have no issues stepping in and helping your friend so long as you don’t mind the publicity. It’s your call.”

 

“Weren’t you worried about me being kidnapped?”

 

“That was before I found out that you fight vampires every week.” Tony told him. “Kidnappers seem like small fry compared to that. Besides, David tells me that your training is going very well.”

 

Xander groaned. “It’s horrible. I don’t think I’ve been pain free in over a month.”

 

“But how far can you run now?”

 

“Four miles a day.” Xander admitted. “Cordy’s running two miles a day, but we take Sunday off.”

 

“That’s thirty two miles a week.” Tony sounded impressed. “You must really be working hard.”

 

“Yeah,” Xander grinned, he loved it when Tony sounded proud of him. “Better to work hard than end up dead.”

 

“That’s a good motto.” Tony told him. “Short, sharp and snappy. Are you noticing a difference when you’re fighting vampires?”

 

“I haven’t actually been out patrolling in weeks.” Xander told him. “Now that Faith’s in town, she and Buffy go together and us non-slayer types stay safe home in bed.”

 

“Good.” Tony said, sounding relieved. “Better to stay inside at night than end up dead.”

 

Xander laughed. “I don’t think that has the same ring to it as mine did.”

 

“No,” Tony sounded as though he was grinning. “Still true though.”

 

“I miss it.” Xander admitted. “I feel so useless just hanging out at the mansion while my friends are out protecting the world from vampires.”

 

“I know how you feel.” Tony admitted.

 

“I’ve been thinking that maybe once I’ve gotten better at fighting I might be able to patrol on my own.” Xander told him. “Not for a while, of course. I’ve got ages to go until I’m good enough, but maybe in the future.”

 

“You have no idea how much I hate that idea.” Tony said seriously. “Just, don’t do anything until I’ve managed to get the weapons I’ve been working to to you. And maybe some kind of kevlar to protect your neck.”

 

6-6-6

 

“The wicked witch is dead!” Willow crowed the next morning.

 

Xander exchanged a confused look with Cordelia as they walked across the library towards the table. “What?”

 

“Well, not dead.” Willow corrected herself. “And to call her a witch is an insult to all of us who do magic, but the sentiment still stands.”

 

Xander glanced around the room for help. “And again I say, what?”

 

Giles took off his glasses and began to clean them. “It would appear that Mrs. Post was not, in fact, sent by the Watcher’s Council, but was a former employee of the Council who was dismissed a few years ago due to inappropriate use of black magic.”

 

“How’d you figure it out?” Xander asked curiously.

 

“I, uh, didn’t.” Giles admitted. “Apparently when Mr. and Mrs. Osborne confronted Mrs. Post about her treatment of Faith, she was unable to hide the fact that she had no knowledge of their connection to Faith. Knowing that I had discussed their guardianship of Faith with the Council, they contacted me immediately and I rang the Council. They asked me to incapacitate her, which I have done, and they will be sending a team to pick her up this evening.”

 

“What did she want?” Cordelia asked curiously.

 

“We don’t know for sure.” Giles admitted. “But we suspect that she may have been after the Glove of Myhnegon. Thankfully, after a night of research, I believe I might know where it is hidden.”

 

“Oh,” Xander winced. “About that…”

 

“Yes?” Giles returned his glasses to nose and stared down them at Xander.

 

“I mentioned the glove to Angel when I took him his blood yesterday.” Xander admitted. “And he knew where it was, so we helped him destroy it.”

 

Giles’ mouth dropped open. “You did what??”

 

6-6-6

 

_ ‘Tony Stark: Rehabilitated or Just Busy?’ _

 

_ ‘Tony Stark vs. Iron Man: Only One Remains’ _

 

_ ‘The Five Stages of Tony Stark’s Grief’ _

 

_ ‘Genius, Billionaire,  _ _ Playboy _ _ , Philanthropist: Where is Our Beloved Playboy?’ _

 

Tony’s swept across the different magazine covers on the table and groaned. How did him  _ not _ getting drunk and doing outrageous things in public get the attention of the tabloids?

 

“Anything I can sue them for, JARVIS?” 

 

“Yes, sir.” JARVIS answered. “I have sent the offending articles to Miss Potts.”

 

“And I have sent them to your lawyers.” Pepper added briskly.

 

“Great.” Tony looked back at the magazines. “Anything in particular I should be worried about?”

 

“Star believes that you are dying of an unknown, but highly contagious disease.” Pepper told him. “OK! is convinced that Cassandra Paez is carrying your child, apparently she didn’t drink any champagne at a dinner she attended last week. Meanwhile, In Touch has begun ringing the wedding bells for you and Isabella Carter.”

 

Tony rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Really? Isabella? Cassandra? This is because I danced with them at the gala last week. Why didn’t Amelia Trainer make the list? I actually dropped her home a few weeks ago.”

 

Pepper pointed at the cover of the OK! Magazine. “Apparently she is currently having an affair with her makeup artist.”

 

“No, she’s not.” Tony frowned. “She’s still seething over Justin Moreau.”

 

Pepper shrugged a shoulder. “Well, OK! doesn’t seem aware of that.”

 

“Damn it.” Tony grimaced, sweeping his eyes across the magazines again. “I wanted to stay out of the tabloids for the rest of the year.”

 

Pepper looked sceptical. “Why?”

 

Tony looked out the window, at the ocean below his house. “I don’t like the idea of Xander reading about me doing stupid stuff.”

 

Not to mention that between his time in Afghanistan, Yinsen’s death, Obie’s betrayal, finding out he had a son, and learning that vampires existed, living such a frivolous lifestyle seemed shallow.  It wasn’t new information to him, he’d always known that his interests and lifestyle had been shallow. The difference was that before he hadn’t cared but now he knew he knew he needed to do better. Not only to prove Obie wrong, and to improve his reputation, but for Yinsen, who had died for him, and Xander, who looked up to him

 

Pepper was staring at him. “So you are rehabilitated?”

 

“ _ And _ busy.” Tony added quickly. It wouldn’t do to completely debunk his image. “I’m working on a lot of different projects for SI at the moment.” 

 

“I think your PR team would tell you that good publicity is good for Stark Industries.” Pepper commented. 

 

Tony eyed her skeptically. “Is there anything else my PR team asked you to pass along because they’re too scared to do it themselves?”

 

Pepper flushed slightly. “Only that if you want to reform your public image you need to be strategic about it and actually do some interviews.”

 

“Well,” Tony looked out to the sea again and tried to remember that he was doing this for Xander - who deserved to have a better role model, a better father, than Tony was. “You can make an appointment for one of them to meet with me next week. We can discuss  _ strategies _ then.”

 

Pepper’s mouth formed an ‘o’, before she closed it and nodded briskly. “Of course, Mr. Stark.”


	8. ExclusION

“Have you looked at them yet?” Willow asked, falling into step beside Xander.

 

Xander clenched his eyes shut in frustration. “No.”

 

“But they’ve been out for two hours!” Willow protested. “Even Buffy’s checked her scores.”

 

“So I heard.” Xander nodded. “1960.”

 

“It’s great, right?” Willow bounced in place. “Now she’ll be able to go to college with me.”

 

“Yeah,” Xander answered flatly. “It’s great. How did you do?”

 

Willow’s shoulders slumped. “I only got 740 on Critical Reading. Oz says I shouldn’t worry about it. I mean, I still got 2300 altogether, so hopefully it won’t have hurt my chances too much. I looked it up online and with my GPA I still have about a 30% chance of getting into Harvard and Oxford.”

 

“Congrats, Willow.” Xander told her sincerely. “So, you’re considering moving to England?”

 

Willow looked scandalised. “Of course not! All my friends are here. Besides, I’m hoping that Buffy and I will get into the same college. That way I can still help her fight the good fight, you know. I just want to know that I could have gone to Oxford, if I wanted to.”

 

Xander didn’t feel brave enough to ask where exactly he featured in Willow’s dreams for the future.

 

“Anyway,” Willow continued. “Why haven’t you looked at your scores yet, Mister? Is it because you don’t have internet at home? Because we could go look them up on one of the library computers after class.”

 

“I just haven’t had the time.” Xander answered, partially honestly. “I go running before school now, and then I went to give Angel some blood, and then there were classes.”

 

Well, that, and he really didn’t want to know. Maybe he should just make some up to pacify Willow and then forget that he’d even taken the test.

 

“You’re still running every morning?” Willow looked surprised. 

 

“Of course.” Xander paused to let Willow enter the classroom ahead of him. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

 

“You’ve stopped limping and groaning.” Willow pointed out, dropping into her seat and beginning to unpack her back. 

 

“Because I’ve gotten fit enough that it doesn’t hurt anymore.” Xander explained. “I’m running about four miles every day.”

 

“Oh,” Willow’s gaze seemed to get stuck on Xander’s chest. “Wow. I guess that explains why...”

 

Xander shifted uncomfortably as Willow trailed off, her face flushing, and he looked around for help. Damn it, why wasn’t Cordelia or Oz in this class? Or even Buffy? 

 

“Cordelia’s still running with me every morning too.” Xander blurted out desperately. “She says it’s great for her cheerleading.”

 

Willow grimaced slightly. “Oh, good for her.”

 

“We’re thinking of going running along one of the trails this weekend.” Xander continued. “Maybe take a picnic and make a day of it.”

 

“Maybe Oz and I could come.” Willow suggested. “It could be a double date!”

 

Xander very much doubted that Oz would be even remotely interested in the idea - especially since he had been giving Xander and Willow suspicious looks for weeks.

 

“You don’t run though.” Xander pointed out. “Neither of you do.”

 

“Then we should do something else.” Willow decided. “Like bowling. We haven’t gone bowling in ages.”

 

“We should invite Buffy too.” Xander decided. “And Faith. Make it a big group thing.”

 

Willow’s face fell. “Don’t you think it would be fun to double date though? I’ve never been on a double date before.”

 

“I’ll talk to Cordelia about it.” Xander promised eventually. 

 

7-7-7

 

That night, when he was alone in the top floor of the mansion, Xander carefully typed in the password to access his SAT results. As tempting as it was to just ignore them, there were too many people in his life who wouldn’t let him get away with that. Not only had Willow spent the day nagging him about them, but Cordy and Tony had both asked multiple times as well. Tony had even started sending him a text every hour.

 

He wasn’t even sure what he was so worried about. It wasn’t as though his future depended on his scores, like Willow and Buffy’s had. And he already knew that he was the stupidest Stark in generations, having his SATs confirm that wasn’t going to be a surprise.

 

But, he still didn’t want to have to admit bad results to Tony, or have his scores fall short when compared to all his friends. He’d known that Willow and Cordy’s scores would be way higher than his, but even Buffy had done amazingly - which seemed ridiculously unfair. Not only was she in a lower track than Xander, but her GPA was an entire 0.8 points behind his.

 

Xander clicked on the button that would lead him to his scores and clenched his fists to prevent himself from clicking out of the the page before his results loaded. He really didn’t want to know that he’d gotten…

 

720 for Reading; 740 for Maths; 710 for Writing.

 

That gave him a combined score of 2170 which was higher than Cordelia  _ and  _ Buffy. That was just…

 

He scrambling for his cellphone, before quickly dialing Tony’s number.

 

“Hey, Xander,” Tony’s voice came through the phone, only a few seconds later. “Have you checked your marks yet?”

 

“2170.” Xander blurted out. “I got 2170.”

 

“Wow,” Tony exclaimed. “Pepper, he got 2170!” 

 

“Very nice.” Pepper’s voice could be heard in the background. “Tell him congratulations from me.”

 

“Pepper says well done.” Tony told Xander. “2170, that’s not bad at all. It’s more than I got.”

 

Xander rolled his eyes. “That’s because there were only two sections when you took it. I bet you got 1600.”

 

“1595 actually.” Tony admitted. “Dad was furious.”

 

“You were twelve, right?” Xander asked, finding it hard to believe that anyone would be disappointed that their twelve year old got a single question wrong in the SATs.

 

“Yeah,” Tony nodded. “Anyway, enough about me, we were talking about your score.”

 

“It’s hardly a 1595 at age twelve. Your dad would probably have disowned me.” Xander pointed out, before instantly regretting it. It wasn’t as though Tony would need his help in noticing the ways that Xander fell short of the Stark standard.

 

“My dad was a bastard.” Tony said harshly. “Not literally of course, there’s no way Mum would have been allowed to marry him if he was - she was from old money, you know...”

 

“I didn’t.” Xander admitted.

 

“But he was a bastard nonetheless.” Tony continued. “2170 is definitely something to be proud of and I’m...I’m proud of you.”

 

Xander attempted to swallow away the lump that had suddenly appeared in his throat. “I, uh, um…”

 

“What were your individual scores?” Tony asked, apparently taking pity on him.

 

Xander looked back at the computer screen. “720 for reading, 740 for maths, and 710 for writing.”

 

“Very decent.” Tony commented. “And definitely above average. JARVIS, what percentile does that put Xander in?”

 

“Ninety eighth percentile, sir.” JARVIS’ crisp voice could be heard through the phone.

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open. “Really?” He squeaked.

 

7-7-7

 

Xander had been dreading admitting to his SAT scores, but it ended up being quite fun. He told Cordelia first, when they were stretching for their morning run, and she gave him a smug look and had reminded him that she had predicted that he would do well.

 

Cordelia was the one to tell the rest of the gang, announcing it proudly as soon as they met in front of the school, and Xander enjoyed seeing everyone’s mouths drop open in shock. Well, he enjoyed it for the first few seconds, but then it started to get a bit insulting.

 

The best thing about the entire interaction was that Cordelia got so offended by Willow’s doubting of Xander’s marks, that Xander had a good excuse to turn down Willow’s double date idea. Which would have been an absolute catastrophe.

 

Unfortunately that didn’t stop Willow from staring at him and, in one class, actually rubbing her foot on his ankle. 

 

“You’ve got to stop!” Xander snapped, yanking his ankle away from her.

 

Willow look wounded. “Stop what?”

 

Xander glanced around to ensure that no one was listening, before lowering his voice. “Stop staring at me, stop blushing when I’m around, and stop touching me!”

 

“But,” Willow bit her lip. “But I…”

 

“You have Oz.” Xander whispered sternly. “And I have Cordelia. I  _ love _ Cordelia.”

 

“And I love Oz!” Willow whispered back.

 

“Then stop staring at me!”

 

Willow frowned. “I’m trying. It’s just so hard. Ever since we almost kissed...”

 

“Shut up.” Xander hissed angrily, looking around to make sure no one had heard. “We’ll talk about this after class.”

 

Willow crossed her arms. “Fine.”

 

Waiting the ten minutes until the bell rang was almost torture, but eventually class was over and Xander albut pulled Willow out of the classroom and down the hall until they found somewhere they could talk privately.

 

“That’s twice now you’ve said that when anyone could have been listening.” Xander snapped. “Do you want the whole school to find out?!”

 

“You started the conversation.” Willow returned, crossing her arms over her chest. 

 

“I was whispering!” Xander reminded her. “You’re the one whose voice kept getting louder and louder.”

 

“You just don’t want Cordelia to find out.” Willow looked almost smug.

 

“Cordelia already knows.” Xander said through gritted teeth. “Jonathan heard us talking about it before homecoming and tried to start a rumour. Cordelia’s the one who put a stop to it.”

 

“And she didn’t break up with you?”

 

“No need to look so happy for me.” Xander told her sarcastically. “No, she didn’t. I explained how it had been an accident, that I loved her, and that  _ it was never going to happen again. _ So stop staring at me.”

 

Willow’s gaze shifted to the side. “You shouldn’t say never.”

 

Xander closed his eyes and let out his breath slowly. “Willow, I love Cordelia. Even if you break up with Oz, I’m never going to break up with Cordelia. Nothing is going to happen between us.”

 

“I’m not going to break up with Oz!” Willow protested. “He’s great! He gives me Witch Pez’s and…wait, what do you mean ‘you’re never going to break up with her’? You can’t actually be planning on marrying her!”

 

Xander clenched his teeth at the disdain in Willow’s expression and tone. “I don’t know yet, we’re still in highschool.”

 

“But she’s Cordelia!” Willow protested.

 

“Oh my gosh, Willow!” Xander exploded. “Would you fricken stop it. I know that she’s Cordelia, but she’s changed since she was being horrible to us. And I fricken love her, so you need to back off!”

 

Willow stared at him, her mouth hanging open. “Alexander Lavelle Harris!”

 

“Willow, I swear, if you make one comment about my language.” Xander snapped. “You don’t like Cordelia, I get that, but I love her, and I’m not going to stop loving her no matter what you say, or how much you try and seduce me. So back off, stop staring at me, and leave Cordelia alone!”

 

Willow looked outraged. “I’m not trying to seduce you!”

 

“Oh?” Xander asked. “What would you call it? Constantly staring at me, rubbing your foot against my ankle, touching my arm every opportunity you get. You’re not subtle, Willow. Even Oz has noticed. So if you want to keep him as a boyfriend, and me as a friend, figure out a way to stop!”

 

7-7-7

 

As it turned out, the private place that Xander had chosen for his ad Willow’s argument hadn’t been as private as he had hoped and, while nobody seemed to have heard anything incriminating, they had heard his swearing at Willow and declaring his love for Cordelia.

 

Somehow it became the big news for the day and Xander spent his afternoon classes trying not to notice all the stares and whispers. Weirdly enough, the stares didn’t seem judgemental or mocking, instead they just seemed interested. 

 

“I don’t get it.” He complained to Cordelia as they met in front of his locker after their last classes. “Why do they care so much?”

 

“The same reason people care that Cassandra Paez might be pregnant with Tony Stark’s child.” Cordelia told him, smirking as Xander grimaced at the mention of one of the rumours.

 

“That makes no sense.” Xander pointed out, as they began walking towards the carpark. “We’re not celebrities.”

 

“Not yet anyway.” Cordelia agreed pointedly. “But I that doesn’t change the fact that we are the most popular seniors in school.”

 

“You might be,” Xander agreed, remembering how decisively Cordelia had won Homecoming Queen. “But Willow and I aren’t.”

 

“Willow isn’t, but you are.” Cordelia told him. “Surely you’ve noticed the way everyone watched you. I actually saw a bunch of boys wearing hawaiian shirts the other day.”

 

Xander stared at her. “What? When did this happen?”

 

“I told you we could rule the school.” Cordelia told him smugly. “And all it took was attending a few parties.”

 

“A few parties?” Xander asked skeptically. “We go to two a week. We’re going to Percy’s party tonight!”

 

“Yes, well, staying popular takes hard work.” Cordelia told him unfeelingly. “Tony could tell you that.”

 

“See the thing I don’t get is why we want to be popular.” Xander admitted. “Anonymity can be nice. Nobody would have cared if Willow and I had a fight a year ago.”

 

7-7-7

 

“Buffy!” Xander slid to halt, a few feet inside the mansion. “What are you doing here?”

 

Buffy looked just as surprised as Xander felt. “I’m visiting Angel. What are you doing here?”

 

Xander blinked. He was here to quickly change clothes for dinner at the Chase’s and then Percy West’s party. “I, uh, brought Angel some blood.”

 

“You’re still doing that?” Buffy glanced towards Angel. “I thought you said you were doing better.”

 

“Oh, he is.” Xander said quickly, before Angel could open his mouth. “It’s just that, well, I got used to doing it, and it’s sort of on my way home, so I still like to help out sometimes.”

 

Buffy looked between them. “Really?”

 

“Xander’s been very helpful.” Angel said stiffly.

 

“You guys hate each other.” Buffy said. “Right? Please tell me you still hate each other.”

 

Xander exchanged a desperate look with Angel. “Uh, well, I wouldn’t say I like the guy, I mean, he’s a vampire, but it would be a bit unreasonable to hate him when he hasn’t actually done anything to hurt me, right?”

 

“Right.” Angel agreed. “It’s not as though we are friends, we just…”

 

“Don’t hate each other anymore.” Xander finished for him.

 

Buffy was looking lost. “He hasn’t done anything to hurt you? Xander, he tried to end the world, remember?”

 

Angel looked hurt.

 

“That wasn’t Angel though.” Xander reminded her. “Isn’t that what you keep telling us? That Angel’s a different person now?”

 

“But you hate each other!” Buffy protested. “First, Cordelia and now Angel. Xander are you planning on befriending everyone we hate?!”

 

“But you don’t hate Angel.” Xander said, glancing towards Angel for help. “You’re the one keeps trying to convince us that he’s not so bad.”

 

“He’s not.” Buffy agreed, before turning to Angel. “You’re really, really not. In fact, you’re great, really great, it’s just...like the whole world has turned upside down. Willow and Xander are fighting, Xander loves Cordelia, I got a great score on my SATs,  _ Xander _ got an even better score, and now you two don’t hate each other anymore...It makes no sense.”

 

“You got a good score?” Angel asked Xander interestedly. 

 

“2170. Which is in the ninety eighth percentile.” Xander added, when Angel looked confused.

 

“Congratulations.” Angel told him sincerely.

 

“See?!” Buffy said. “Everything is weird. It’s like opposites day. Maybe when Giles gets back we should start researching what could have caused all of this.”

 

Xander frowned at her. “Buffy, Cordy and I have been dating for over six months. It’s not like it’s new or anything.” He glanced at his watch. “Anyway, I’ve got to go, I’m supposed to be at Cordelia’s house in twenty minutes and I’ve still got to get changed.”

 

“You’re going to Cordelia’s house?” Buffy asked. “You’ve met her parents? And they haven’t, I don’t know, sent her to...one of those places people go to to become nuns?”

 

Xander rolled his eyes at her and turned to the door. “I’ll see you guys later.”

 

“Xander, aren’t you forgetting something?” Buffy asked.

 

“Huh?”

 

“The blood?” Buffy reminded him.

 

“Oh,” Xander swallowed down a grimaced. Yeah, that excuse would have worked a lot better if he’d actually had blood in his bag.

 

“Actually, I’ve a lot today already.” Angel said quickly. “Why don’t you put it in the fridge and bring it back tomorrow.”

 

7-7-7

 

Dinner at Cordelia’s house was as awkward as usual. Any goodwill he might have won when Cordelia told them about his SAT scores, was immediately lost when Xander admitted that he wasn’t planning on going to college. Cordelia didn’t seem impressed to hear that either.

 

Percy’s party was much more enjoyable, especially since Xander felt as though he was seeing everything through new eyes. Now that Cordelia had pointed it out to him, Xander couldn’t help but notice how eager people were to speak to him (even when Cordelia wasn’t with him). It was weird, and strange, and wonderful, but he still wasn’t sure how it had happened. He was still the guy they had ignored and mocked through Elementary, Junior High, and the first three years of High School. He wondered what would happened if and Cordelia were to break up. Would they immediately slot him back into the category that Buffy and Willow fell into? Probably.

 

Cordelia disagreed. 

 

“You’re not popular because of me. You became popular because of me, sure, but I’m not the reason that they keep inviting you to join the swim team again.” She told Xander the next morning.

 

“No, that’s because half their old members turned into monsters.” Xander pointed out.

 

“You should think about joining.” Cordelia told him, not for the first time. “It would look great on your college applications.”

 

Xander gave her a hard look. “I’m not applying to any colleges.”

 

“Right.” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Anyway, they really do like you, Xander. Well, as much as anyone ever likes anyone. You should hear what the girls say about you when the guys aren’t around?”

 

Xander wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “What do they say?”

 

Cordelia laughed. “Let’s just say, that if our school had a Homecoming King, as well as a Queen, you would have won easily.”

 

“I doubt it.” Xander said. “Percy would have won it.”

 

“Percy?” Cordelia asked haughtily. “That wannabe?”

 

“He’s the Captain of the Basketball team.” Xander reminded her. “And he throws great parties every couple of weeks.”

 

“All true,” Cordelia agreed. “But he doesn’t have hair that the girls want to run their hands through.”

 

Xander’s eyes widened. “What?”

 

Cordelia affected a fake voice. “Or a body that is just to die for.” 

 

Xander looked down at himself. “I have a body to die for?”

 

“According to Harmony.”

 

“Oh, why did you have to tell me that?” Xander complained with a grimace. “Harmony? Really?”

 

Cordelia leaned into him as they stopped in front of her locker, and held her lips barely an inch from Xander’s ear. “It’s one of the few things Harmony and I agree on.”

 

Xander turned his head so that he could capture her lips against his. He loved kissing Cordy, it was his absolute favourite thing to do and... 

 

“PDA alert.” Buffy’s voice sounded from just behind them.

 

Xander ignored her for a few seconds, before breaking away from Cordelia with a sigh and turning towards Buffy. “Good morning, Buffy.”

 

“Clearly the two of you think so.” Buffy grinned. “What’s got the pair of you so randy?”

 

“Randy?” Xander asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’ve been spending way too much time with Giles. Though why the two of you would be talking about people being ‘randy’ is not something I want to think about.”

 

Buffy made a disgusted face. “Thanks for that, Xander.”

 

“What’s going on?” Willow asked, suddenly appearing next to Buffy. 

 

“We were just talking about how…” Xander broke off with a frown. “What happened to your face?”

 

Willow brought a hand up to the bruise on her cheek. “Oh, well, I kind of got kidnapped by Spike last night.”

 

“What?” Xander exclaimed, glancing between her and Buffy. “Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

 

“You were busy, right?” Buffy asked, her gaze darting towards Cordelia. “Besides, Faith, Oz, and I handled it.”

 

Xander swallowed heavily. “I wasn’t too busy to help rescue one of my best friends from a vampire! Cordy and I would have helped look for her.”

 

Buffy winced. “I know, but we didn’t really need any more help. I mean, we didn’t even know she was missing until Spike suddenly turned up to my house. I didn’t believe him at first, so I rang Oz to see if he knew where she was, so he and Faith came to help, but there wouldn’t have been anything for you to do.”

 

“She’s right, Xander.” Willow chipped in. “Oz was the one to find me anyway. He used his werewolf nose to sniff me out.”

 

Xander looked between Buffy and Willow in disbelief. How did they not understand that they should have called him? So what if there was nothing he could do, it hadn’t helped them all from being called in in the past.

 

Buffy and Willow were both frowning at him worriedly. “Xander?”

 

“So why’d Spike kidnap you anyway?” Cordelia asked suddenly, squeezing Xander’s hand. “Clearly it wasn’t for hairstyling tips - you need them just as much as he does.”

 

Willow glared at her. “He wanted me to perform a love spell, to make Drusilla love him again.”

 

Xander forced a grin. “A love spell. Bad, bad idea.”

 

“Why you?” Cordelia asked. “It’s not like you’re any good yet.”

 

Willow bristled. “He must have overheard me talking to the lady at the magic shop about the ingredients for a delusting spell.”

 

“A delusting spell?” Buffy asked, with a confused frown. “You didn’t tell me that.”

 

Willow shrugged uncomfortably, her gaze on the floor. “Yeah, I was just researching it, it’s got some interesting ingredients.”

 

Xander wasn’t fooled. “It sounds like a dangerous thing to mess around with.” He said seriously. “Remember what happened when Amy cast that love spell for me?”

 

“I wouldn’t have cast it.” Willow defended quickly. “I mean, why would I? It’s not like I’m lusting after anyone other than Oz, and why would I want to stop lusting after my boyfriend?”

 

“Very true.” Buffy agreed, with a small smile. 

 

Xander eyed Willow suspiciously. “Good.”

 

7-7-7

 

Xander wasn’t sure what to do with the knowledge that he and Cordelia had been left out of Willow’s rescue mission. Why wouldn’t Buffy have rung him? She had never worried about him being busy when she had needed help in the past, though he supposed that was the problem. There hadn’t been a job for him to do this time. No researching needed to be done, just plain old slayering, and he was more trouble than he was worth in those sorts of situations.

 

Still, she’d had a job for a Oz, a job that Xander and Cordelia could have helped with and have felt like part of the team. Which sounded silly, even as he thought it. Willow had been in trouble and he was glad that Buffy hadn’t wasted time by trying to find a job for everyone to make them feel better. But Willow had been in trouble, and nobody had even thought to text him.

 

Not to mention that neither Buffy or Willow seemed to even realise that he might have wanted to know. He knew that they were closer to each other than they were to him now, which he supposed was only natural, but they were his best friends. What was he going to do when they went off to college and forgot all about him?

 

If anyone had asked him half a year ago about his friendship with them, he would have sworn that they would be best friends for life, but now he wasn’t so sure. And, if he was honest with himself, the idea was less devastating than he had thought it would be.

 

How had things changed so much in just six months? 

 

The last time things had seemed normal between him, Buffy, and Willow had been before the argument about whether to try and re-soul Angel. Then Buffy had run away, and he’d found out about Tony, and Willow had been bitchy, and Buffy had come back and not apologised, and he’d decided not to tell either of them about Tony. 

 

Maybe if he told them about Tony now things would go back to normal, back to how it had been before. Except even has he thought it, Xander knew it wasn’t true. The distance between him and his friends wasn’t just about Tony. It was about how they hated Cordelia, and how Buffy had run away, and how Willow thought she was better than him, and how he sometimes prefered to spend time with Cordelia’s friends than with them, and how Willow kept flirting with him.

 

Telling them about Tony wouldn’t help with any of those things.

 

7-7-7

 

“Xander,” Tony sounded pleased. “How are you?”

 

“Tired.” Xander admitted, from where he was lying on his couch.

 

“You just had a training with David, right?” Tony asked. 

 

“Yeah,” Xander nodded. “It finished about half an hour ago, I just got out of the shower.”

 

“How did it go? Learn anything new?”

 

“Always.” Xander groaned. “He’s a real hardass. It was good though. David says my punches are getting better.”

 

“We should spar sometime.” Tony suggested. “I only ever really spar with Happy, it would be nice to have a different opponent.”

 

“You spar with Happy?” Xander asked. “Happy, as in the guy who used to be a professional boxer?”

 

“He takes it easy on me.” Tony said. “Well, that, and I cheat.”

 

Xander grinned. “I think David would have my ass if I ever cheated.” 

 

“Probably.” Tony agreed. “Anything exciting happen over the last few days?”

 

“Willow got kidnapped.” Xander offered. “She’s alright now, the others found her, but a vampire named Spike kidnapped her and tried to force her to cast a love spell on his ex-girlfriend.”

 

“I presume he’s dead now?” Tony asked.

 

“I don’t think so.” Xander frowned. “Buffy didn’t say anything, so I presume he got away. We’ve kind of a history with him, so she would have mentioned it if she managed to stake him.”

 

“And where were you during this adventure?” Tony asked. “Safe in bed, I hope.”

 

“I was at a party.” Xander answered. “With some of Cordelia’s friends...though I suppose they’re kind of my friends too now. It’s just a bit weird to be friends with the cool kids. Anyway, it wasn’t as though I was doing anything important. I would have helped look for Willow if I’d known she was missing, but Buffy didn’t even text me. I didn’t even find out until school this morning.”

 

“Which you’re upset about.” Tony commented, his tone questioning.

 

“We always call everyone in for these kinds of things!” Xander exclaimed. “One of my best friends was missing, kidnapped by a vampires, and no one told me!”

 

“Did they say why?”

 

“Because I was  _ busy _ ,” Xander explained. “And because apparently I couldn’t have done anything to help!”

 

“Right.” Tony didn’t sound like he got it at all. 

 

“They’re my best friends!” Xander told him. “We always did everything together, but now it’s like they’re best friends and I’m the guy who hangs out with them sometimes.”

 

There was a long pause. “This has been happening for a while though, right?” Tony asked eventually. 

 

Xander sighed. “Yeah, but it’s getting worse. Every month there seems to be one more things that we’re arguing about. Willow and I have been best friends since kindergarten, and I thought we’d always be friends, but now…” He trailed off with another sigh.

 

“Well, first, I think we should add friendship advice to the list of things I’m terrible at.” Tony told him. “My oldest friend is Rhodey - I’ve known him since college. Which, given that I graduated when I was your age, is really saying something. Anyway, he works for the Air Force and, since we were already friends, they made him the liaison for Stark Industries. Which was great, because it meant that we got to work together, and play together, and I always work better when I’m making things for people I like.”

 

Tony paused, before continuing. “But I’ve barely spoken since I announced that I wouldn’t be making any more weapons. He came around a few times, but all he wanted to talk about was me reversing my decision, and when I refused he’d storm out. I’m pretty sure that somewhere along the line he started only being my friend because he was paid to be my friend, and now that Stark Industries doesn’t need a military liaison…well, he doesn’t need to be my friend anymore either.”

 

“That sucks.” Xander told him. “Rhodey sounds like a real jerk.”

 

“He might still come around.” Tony said brightly. “But, anyway, what I’m trying to say is that sometimes friendships die - even when you don’t want them to. Yes, you and Willow have been friends for years, so had Rhodey and I, but sometimes you just have to let people go and make new friends. It sounds like you’re already doing that with Cordelia’s friends, and you’ll make new friends at college too.”

 

Xander frowned. “I’m not going to college.”

 

“What?” Tony asked, his disbelief audible. “Of course you are! You got 2170 on your SATs!”

 

“I only took them to prove that I could.” Xander reminded him. “I’ve never been going to college, you know that.”

 

“Xander,” Tony said seriously. “You absolutely  _ have _ to go to college.”

 

“No, I don’t.”

 

“Yes, you do.” Tony argued. “Why wouldn’t you?”

 

“Because it costs a hell of a lot of money.” Xander pointed out.

 

“And you have a credit card that could buy you a small island.”

 

“And Harris’ don’t go to college.”

 

“You’re not a Harris.” Tony said quickly. “You can even change your name to Stark if you want.”

 

“And I’m not that smart.”

 

“You got 2170 in your SATs.”

 

“Yeah, well, my GPA is terrible.” Xander snapped.

 

“It’s 3.6.” Tony told him. “Which isn’t great, but it is above average.”

 

“And it costs just to apply.” Xander retorted. “Why would I pay just to be turned down?”

 

“Well, first, I would like to remind you  _ again _ about your credit card.” Tony told him. “And second, why would they turn you down? Yeah, so you might not get into MIT, but there are plenty of other good colleges out there.”

 

Xander gritted his teeth. “Because I don’t fricken want to!”

 

Tony was silent for a few seconds. “Right, well, that’s not something I can fix.”

 

“No.” Xander agreed.

 

“But I don’t believe you.” Tony told him seriously. “If it was true, it would have been the first thing you said, instead of running through all those excuses that we both know are absolute bull.”

 

Xander clenched his jaw angrily. “I’m not going to college.”

 

Tony’s sigh could be heard through the phone. “Why don’t you come down on Saturday? We can cancel your training with David and you can spend the day with me. That way we can really talk about this.”

 

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Xander told him stiffly. 

 

“Come out anyway.” Tony suggested. “I’ve been meaning to invite you over for ages. If you drive halfway, Happy can meet you there and sneak you past the paparazzi without anyone knowing.”

 

“I was sort of planning on having lunch with Cordy.”

 

“You have lunch with her every day.” Tony pointed out. “Come have lunch with me.”

 

Xander sighed. “Fine.”

 

“Great.” Tony exclaimed happily. “Any favourite foods? I’ll get Pepper to order something special.”

 

“Pizza?”

 

Tony laughed. “Pizza it is.”

 

7-7-7

 

There was something freeing about driving himself out of Sunnydale, though meeting Happy at Oxnard and being chauffeured the remainder of the way just felt weird. It was awkward too. Xander knew that Happy was one of Tony’s friends as well as being his bodyguard, but he had no idea what to talk to the man about. 

 

Thankfully, Happy seemed willing to be the one to start conversations and he and Xander ended up discussing vampires, demons and different styles of fighting for most of the trip. Their conversation died off as they reached Malibu and Happy began pointing out different parts of the town.

 

“Mister Stark’s house is just up here.” Happy said eventually, as he slowed down to pull in front of a large metal gate. “See those cars?”

 

Xander looked over at where Happy was pointing and took in the three cars parked on the side of the road. “Yeah?”

 

“They’re paparazzi.” Happy explained, as the gates opened themselves. “That’s way Mister Stark asked me to pick you up in this car.”

 

Xander looked at the reflective windows gratefully, as they began to drive up the private road. “Do they just sit out there all day?”

 

“Yeap.” Happy shook his head. “They’re hoping to get a picture of someone of interest coming in, or going out.”

 

“But surely they know that Tony would use reflective windows to hide anyone interesting?” Xander asked, as they came around the corner and Tony’s mansion came into view. “Wow! I’ve seen pictures on the internet, but it’s even better in person.”

 

“Mister Stark helped design it himself.” Happy told him. 

 

“Wow.” Xander repeated, unwinding his window so that he could get a better look.

 

“Wait until you see the inside.” Happy commented, as he pulled the car up to the mansion.

 

Xander waited for Happy to turn the car off, before opening his car and jumping out. Even this part of Tony’s home was amazing. Everything from the driveway, to the gardens, to the front door were perfect.

 

He’d only been out of the car a few seconds when Tony suddenly bounded through the door. Xander, welcome! Any problems, Happy?”

 

“No, sir.” Happy denied, standing next to the car.

 

“Excellent.” Tony grinned. “We’ll see you at seven then.”

 

“Seven?” Xander questioned.

 

“That way we can have dinner too.” Tony explained quickly. “Is that alright with you?”

 

“Yeah, of course.” Xander nodded. “I don’t have any other plans.”

 

“Great!” Tony looked excited. “Come inside. I’ll give you a tour.”

 

Xander turned back to Happy, who was getting back into the car. “Thanks, Happy.”

 

Happy smiled broadly. “No worries, Xander.”

 

Xander smiled in return, before turning back to Tony and following him into the house. “Wow.”

 

“I know, right?” Tony grinned proudly. “I had it redecorated earlier this year.”

 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a fish tank that big.” Xander commented, moving until he was standing next to the tank that seemed to actually be one of the walls. There were heaps of different fish swimming in the tank, some big, and some small, but all of them seemed to be either red or gold.

 

“Really?” Tony asked, coming to stand beside him. “You’ve never been to an aquarium?”

 

“Sunnydale doesn’t have one.” Xander explained, watching as school of tiny red fish darted past him. “There’s a zoo, but even their tanks aren’t this big.”

 

Tony grimaced. “I have no idea how anyone survives growing up in that town.”

 

“Most people don’t.” Xander pointed out with a crooked grin.

 

Tony didn’t laugh. “That is not the best thing to say to your father who is barely managing to stop himself from forcibly removing you from that death trap of a town.”

 

“Sorry.”

 

“Don’t worry about it.” Tony said brightly. “Now come see the rest of the house.”

 

The house was the flashest and most amazing house Xander had ever seen, which wasn’t really saying much. Though it was definitely flasher that Cordelia’s house. Xander’s favourite part was definitely the second bedroom, not because of any special decoration, but because Tony had described it as being ‘Xander’s room’. Apparently his father expected him to come come visit often enough that he’d dedicated a bedroom just to him. 

 

Xander wasn’t sure why the gesture meant so much to him. After all, compared to buying him the Crawford Street Mansion, giving him a bedroom was a small thing, but there was still something special about it.

 

“Lunch should be here soon.” Tony told Xander, once he’d finished the tour. “And I thought I’d take you down to my workshop after we’d and show you around - maybe even show you the ropes if you’re interested - but first, can we talk about this college thing.”

 

Xander stiffened. “I’m not going to college.”

 

“Can we talk about this?” Tony asked, leading Xander to the couches in front of the giant fishtank.

 

“I guess.” Xander agreed, dropping down onto a couch that would still allow him to see the fish. “What do you want to talk about?”

 

Tony sat opposite him, and rubbed his hands on his thighs. “I’m so terrible at this stuff, but here goes. Alright, so you don’t want to go to college.”

 

“No.” Xander confirmed.

 

“But not because of the money, because you know I’d pay for it.” Tony said.

 

Xander shrugged. “It seems like a lot of money to spend on something.”

 

“Not really for me.” Tony said dismissively. “But, yeah, I guess it would be for other people. But a lot of people can get financial aid to make it easier.”

 

“There’s no way my parents could have afforded it even with the financial aid.” Xander told him. “Not with all the alcohol they drink and the cigarettes they smoke.”

 

“No.” Tony agreed. “Was there ever a time when you wanted to go to college?”

 

Xander thought back. “Yeah, I think so. When I was about eight. Willow had been talking about going, and the three of us, her, Jesse, and me, decided that we’d all go together. Dad, I mean, Tony, I mean the other Tony, was furious. I think he thought I was going to turn out like you or something.”

 

“Better turn out like me, than turn out like him.” Tony pointed out. 

 

Xander grinned. “Yeah, except I don’t think he saw it like that.” He frowned in thought. “I think that was the second time he broke my arm.”

 

Tony’s hands clenched into fists and he seemed to actually be vibrating with rage. “He broke your arm because you wanted to go to college?”

 

“I think so?” Xander shrugged. “I can’t remember. I do remember him telling me that Harris’ don’t go to college, they work for a living.”

 

Tony snorted. “What does he think the people who go to college do? Sit around and have money dropped on their laps?”

 

“Pretty much.” Xander agreed. “It sounds really stupid when you say it like that.”

 

“It bet it sounds stupid coming out of his mouth too.” Tony pointed out.

 

Xander shrugged. “Yeah, though mostly he just sounds drunk.”

 

“I used to drink a lot.” Tony said suddenly. “I still do sometimes, but I’ve never, ever physically hurt anyone when I was drunk. Pepper told me once that I have two different kinds of drunk - genius drunk, when I invent things and play around with physics, and irresponsible drunk, when I do stupid things like get naked in public. I’m drinking less these days, but if you ever see me drunk I want you to know that I will never hurt you.”

 

Xander blinked. “I know.”

 

“Okay,” Tony nodded, looking a bit embarrassed. “So, back to the college issue. Why don’t you want to go?”

 

Xander shrugged. “I don’t know. It seems like a waste of time.”

 

“Would you call high school a waste of time?” Tony asked.

 

“No,” Xander shook his head. “I mean, it can be, but we’re learning important stuff, right?” He grimaced, noticing the trap too late. “But heaps of people manage to live their entire lives without going to college.”

 

“There are entire countries of people who live their lives without going to college.” Tony commented. “Do you know what that means for their nation?”

 

“What?”

 

“They’re less developed nations.” Tony told him. “They have less doctors, they don’t have scientific breakthroughs, their architecture isn’t designed to be safe in earthquakes, and they end up in debt because no one has learnt economics.”

 

Xander frowned. “But I’m not going to be a doctor, or a scientist, or an architect, or an economics person.”

 

“Those are just examples.” Tony promised him. “Sure there are some useless majors out there, and some people do waste their time, but one day you’re going to run Stark Industries, or at least pay someone to do it for you. Wouldn’t you like to know a little bit about business before that happens?”

 

Xander shuddered at the reminder that one day he would be responsible for Tony’s company. “But I don’t know what I want to do.”

 

“So?” Tony shrugged. “Go to college, take some different papers, you’ve got four years until you really need to figure out what you want to do.”

 

Xander watched as one of the fish in the tank darted away from a bigger fish. “It can’t be that easy though.”

 

“What can’t?”

 

“Everything!” Xander exclaimed, turning his attention back to Tony. “Six months there’s no way I could have gone to college, no way I could have owned a car, no way I could have moved out of home. Now I’m living in a mansion, driving one of the flashest cars in school, and you and Cordelia want me to go to some fancy college.”

 

“Who said anything about a fancy college?” Tony asked. “A decent college would be good enough for me. Something like UCLA.”

 

Xander studied him. “Really? You wouldn’t be, I don’t know, embarrassed to have me go somewhere like that?”

 

Tony laughed. “Xander, of all the embarrassing situations I have found myself in over my lifetime you going to a college like that wouldn’t even register. Besides, UCLA is the fourth best college in California.”

 

“How do you even know that?”

 

“JARVIS and I have been doing some research.” Tony shrugged. “I’ve actually got all the information you’ll need to apply, if you’re interested.”

 

“For UCLA?” Xander asked, not entirely hating the idea anymore. 

 

Tony looked a bit embarrassed. “And thirty three other colleges. JARVIS has filled out the application forms for you, as he’s retrieved your school transcript of your school’s servers too. All you need to do is write out the required essays and get the letters of recommendation.”

 

Xander wasn’t sure whether to be grateful or angry that Tony had done all of that behind his back. “Thirty four colleges?”

 

“You don’t have to apply to them all.” Tony assured him quickly. “We can go through them together later, if you like.”

 

Xander considered it. He still wasn’t entirely convinced about the idea of college, but he supposed that he could at least apply. “Alright.”

 

7-7-7

 

Tony could hardly believe that after spending months coming up with a strategy to convince Xander to go to college he’d almost thrown all his planning out the window during one phone call. Thankfully, Xander had been willing to come down to Malibu and talk to him about it and Tony had been able to start from scratch.

 

It had gone even better than Tony had expected. He really needed to buy Pepper something big as a thank you for all the advice she had given him about Xander. She always seemed to know exactly what he should say to get through to his son. 

 

After lunch, Tony took Xander down to his workshop - the only part of the house that Tony hadn’t shown him during the tour - and introduced him to Dum-E and U. Tony didn’t think he had ever enjoyed watching anything as much as his son interacting with the robots. Xander was so patient with them - so kind - and he actually seemed to get that they were AIs and not scraps of metal that followed orders.

 

Then Tony showed Xander his latest project, a reusable taser-like weapon that would hopefully set a vampire on fire, and discovered that his son didn’t even know the difference between a Philips Head screwdriver and a Flat Head screwdriver. It was unbelievable!

 

Xander seemed embarrassed by his lack of knowledge, so Tony did his best to keep his rage towards Tony and Jessica Harris to himself (they had known that Xander was a Stark and hadn’t even taught him how to hold a screwdriver!) and instead turned his attention to teaching Xander the basics. Xander was an avid pupil and it was far too soon when JARVIS called them up to dinner.

 

“That was amazing!” Xander enthused as they climbed the stairs up to the living room. “I don’t think I have ever had so much fun in my life.”

 

Tony grinned. “It’s great, right?”

 

“And you actually built Dum-E and U like that?” Xander asked.

 

“Along with a bit of computer programming, yeah.” Tony replied, as they rounded the corner to see Pepper waiting for them in the kitchen. “You can build pretty much anything if you’ve got metal and a screwdriver. The Iron Man suit is proof of that.”

 

“That’s incredible!” Xander grinned, before turning his attention to Pepper. “Uh, hi, Miss Potts.”

 

“Pepper.” Pepper corrected him, stepping forward to shake Xander’s hand. “It’s good to see you again, Xander.”

 

“You too.” Xander told her. “Are you joining us for dinner?”

 

“Yes, she is.” Tony answered quickly, just in case Pepper tried to squirm out of it again. 

 

“Cool.” Xander smiled.

 

“JARVIS says you’ve been in the workshop all afternoon?” Pepper asked, as she turned around and started taking food containers out of the paperbags. 

 

“Telltale.” Tony accused, before turning to Xander. “They all conspire against me.”

 

“Who?” Xander looked confused.

 

“Pepper, JARVIS, and Happy.” Tony told him, retrieving plates from a cupboard and placing then on the bench near where Pepper was putting the food. 

 

Xander shook his head. “You are the weirdest kind of boss I’ve ever heard of.”

 

“He’s definitely the weirdest boss I’ve ever worked for.” Pepper agreed. “Are we eating in here?”

 

“We should eat in the lounge.” Tony decided, getting out cutlery.

 

It took them a few minutes to serve the Italian food that Pepper had bought, and then they were all sitting on the couches in front of the fishtank. 

 

“So, Xander,” Pepper started, once they had all started eating. “Have you enjoyed your day?”

 

Xander grinned. “Yeah, it’s been amazing!”

 

“He’s agreed to go to college.” Tony added.

 

“I’ve agreed to apply for college.” Xander corrected. “But Tony made some pretty great points, so I’m a lot more likely to go than I was this morning.”

 

“A lot of those points were actually Pepper’s.” Tony admitted.

 

“Really?” Xander looked surprised.   
  


“Pepper gives great advice.” Tony told him.

 

“I remember.” Xander smiled at her. “Thanks for the advice about my friend. It worked really well.”

 

Tony rested his head back against the couch and watched as his son and his PA interacted. He was glad that he had strong armed Pepper into joining them. She and Xander clearly got along well, which was good because he couldn’t imagine his life without her. Her presence just felt so right and watching her joke and smile with Xander made Tony’s heart twist in a way that it hadn’t before. It felt...odd.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you are are avid Buffy the Vampire fans and remember that Buffy and Willow's SAT results are different here: apparently America has changed the way they do their SATs since Buffy first came out. Back then 1600 was the highest you could get, whereas now you can get 2400. So I had the adjust the numbers to work with the timeline. I hope that it didn't jolt you out of the story to much :)


	9. CelebratION

Xander tried not to shift uncomfortably in his chair as Ms. Stewart, the new school counselor, peered at him over her glasses.

 

“I presume that you, like many of your classmates, made this appointment to request a letter of recommendation for your college applications?”

 

“Yes, ma’am.” Xander nodded jerkily. 

 

Ms. Stewart sighed, but pulled a pad of paper towards herself. “And what did you say your name was?”

 

Xander rubbed his hands against his trousers. “Xander Harris.”

 

Ms. Stewart frowned over her glasses. “Full name please.”

 

“Alexander Lavelle Harris.” Xander answered, before spelling Lavelle for her.

 

“I see,” Ms. Stewart rested her pen on the page. “And what colleges are you planning on applying to?”

 

Xander swallowed nervously. “I don’t have a full list yet, I’m still narrowing it down, but definitely UCLA and Sunnydale.”

 

“So you intend to stay in California then?”

 

“Yeah, I think so.” 

 

“And what is it that you are hoping to study?” Ms. Stewart asked, not looking up from her paper.

 

“Business,” Xander told her with as much confidence as he could muster (which was to say, not much). “And maybe physics.”

 

Ms. Stewart peered at him over her glasses. “Why?”

 

Xander gulped, that wasn’t a question he had prepared an answer for. “Well, I’m good at physics,  and I really enjoy it, so...” He trailed off with a shrug.

 

“And business?” Ms. Stewart asked.

 

“It sounds useful.” Xander blurted out desperately. 

 

“Hmm,” Ms. Stewart returned her pen to the paper. “What would you say your three greatest strengths are?”

 

Xander stared at her. “What?”

 

Ms. Stewart raised an eyebrow. “What are you good at?”

 

“I don’t know.” Xander admitted. “Um, I guess I’m good at making people laugh.”

 

“And?”

 

“And…” Xander searched his brain. He could be brave, in a terrified out of his mind but still doing something to help sort of a way, but he wouldn’t be able to give Ms. Stewart any examples of that without mentioning vampires, magic, or demons. “I can be pretty good with people? I mean, I’m good at comforting people who are upset and stuff. And I’m, uh, honest. I say what I think.”

 

“I see.” Ms. Stewart said, writing something down. “And what involvement have you had in school activities over the last three years? What clubs have you been part of? What volunteer work have you done?”

 

“I was a member of the Swim Team for a while last year.” Xander told her, glad that they had moved to a topic that he had rehearsed the answer for. “I took a break for the first few months this year, but I joined it again on Monday. I’ve been a member of Giles’ Archaeology Club since Sophomore year…”

 

“Oh,” Ms. Stewart looked up from her paper. “You’re that Harris.”

 

Xander swallowed. “Is that a good thing?”

 

“That depends on who you ask.” Ms. Stewart told him. “Go on.”

 

Xander eyed her nervously. She’d only worked at their school for three weeks. How much could she really have heard about him?

 

“Well, I volunteered to help the Elementary School students go trick-or-treating last year.”

 

“But not this year?” Ms. Stewart asked.

 

“Principal Snyder didn’t offer us the opportunity this year.” Xander explained. “He asked us to sell Band Candy instead, and then we helped to clean off the graffiti around the school after someone broke in.”

 

“Anything else?” 

 

“No,” Xander admitted. “I know it’s not much, but…”

 

“It isn’t the shortest list I’ve heard this week.” Ms. Stewart commented. “Now, are there any comments you would like to make regarding your academics?”

 

“I’ve kind of skated for the last three years.” Xander admitted. “I had two best friends when I got to High School, Willow and Jesse. Willow’s like a genius, but Jesse didn’t pick up on stuff as quickly and she did, and I was kind of in the middle. But Jesse didn’t like asking for help, so I would pretend that I didn’t understand it either so that Willow could explain it to both of us.”

 

Ms. Stewart leant back in her chair, but she seemed to be listening.

 

“But then Jesse disappeared at the beginning of Sophomore year,” Xander continued. “And I just never stopped playing dumb. I wasn’t planning on going to college anyway, so I didn’t see the point. So my GPA isn’t great, but it’s not terrible either.”

 

“What is it exactly?” Ms. Stewart asked, leaning forward and resting her pen on her paper again.

 

“3.6.” Xander admitted. “But my SAT combined score was 2170, and if you just count my grades from this year I have a 4.3 GPA.”

 

“Yes, you’re taking an Advanced Placement class, aren’t you.” Ms. Stewart commented, as she began writing again. “Mister Peters is quite impressed with the improvement of your work this year. I presume you will be asking Mister Giles to write your teacher recommendation, but any of your applications require two teacher recommendations, Mister Peters might be a good person to ask.”

 

“Really?” Xander blinked. “And I’m actually taking three AP classes. Physics B, English Lit and Comp, and Calculus BC.”

 

Ms. Stewart frowned down at her paper. “With a GPA of 3.6?”

 

Xander shrugged. “I’ve always known how to do just enough to stay in the same class as Wils.”

 

“But something changed this year?” Ms. Stewart commented. “What?”

 

“I don’t know how to explain it.” Xander told her. “Our physics class won a free trip to the Stark Science Symposium in LA over the Summer and, when we were there, I won an opportunity to meet Tony Stark.”

 

“And he inspired you to do better in your classes?”

 

“Not really,” Xander denied. “But one of my friends made some comments about how she deserved to meet him more than I did, because she’s smarter than I am, and I realised that I was sick of people thinking that I’m dumb.”

 

“And what made you want to attend college?”

 

Xander rubbed his arm. “When I was a kid my dad told me that I wasn’t allowed to go to college and I guess I just stopped listening to him.”

 

“I see.” Ms. Stewart wrote something down. “I presume that you will you be reliant on financial aid then?”

 

“No,” Xander shook his head. “My Uncle died a few months ago and he left me some money that I could use for college if I wanted to.”

 

Ms. Stewart looked surprised, but she continued to write. “Is there anything else you would like me to know?”

 

“No, ma’am.” Xander shook his head. “I can’t think of anything.”

 

“Then I’d say that we are done here.” Ms. Stewart told him, placing her pen beside the paper. “The only other thing I need from you, is the list of colleges that you need me to send it too.”

 

“I’ll have it for you next week.” 

 

8-8-8

 

Giles’ initial surprise and disbelief that Xander wanted him to write him a recommendation for colleges was almost insulting, but at least he’d agreed to write the letter (and had promised not to mention it to Buffy and Willow). Mr. Peters’ reaction was enough to make up for Giles’ disbelief though. Xander hadn’t even known that his AP Physics teacher liked him, but Mr. Peters had responded to his request with delight.

 

Once that was done, all Xander needed to do was figure out how many of the colleges that Tony had shorted listed (if you could call thirty four colleges a short list) he wanted to apply to. He was pretty sure that he didn’t want to leave California, what if there was an apocalypse and Buffy needed his help? Besides, other than a few relatives that he’d never really spoken to, he didn’t know anyone who lived in any of the other states.

 

Unfortunately, Tony had put twelve different Californian colleges on the list, so it didn’t narrow the list down enough, but eventually Xander managed to reduce the list to six colleges. Which meant six essays to write.

 

Thankfully, he had until the end of November before any of his applications were due in which gave him plenty of time. Well, that was, unless you considered that he still had his usual classes, regular practises for the Swim Team, three trainings a week with David, a girlfriend to spend time with, two groups of friends to keep up with, and a father who had started suggesting that Xander ought to visit him every week.

 

The idea of visiting Tony was really tempting, especially after he’d experienced how easy and enjoyable it was, but Xander was worried that if he did it too often people would start asking questions. What if there was some kind of apocalypse emergency and his friends needed his help, only to find out that he wasn’t even in Sunnydale? 

 

Still, Tony’s suggestion that he make the trip every Sunday was very hard to turn down. He had loved spending time with his father, not to mention that Tony’s workshop was pretty much the coolest place Xander had ever been to. Sure there had been an awkward moment at the beginning when Xander had to admit that he knew practically nothing about building things, but then Tony had spent hours patiently teaching him the basics. It had been amazing.

 

So, when Tony suggested that he come down on the eighth of November, to celebrate his birthday that coming Wednesday, Xander couldn’t find the strength to say no. Especially when Tony promised that they could spent the entire day in the workshop together.

 

The drive from Oxnard to Tony’s house was much less awkward than it had been the first time. Not only did Xander feel as though he knew Happy a bit better, having spent over an hour in the car with him just over a week beforehand, but he also wasn’t as nervous about the idea of spending the day with Tony as he had been.

 

There were four cars worth of paparazzi outside Tony’s gate this time and Xander ducked down slightly, despite the fact that the car had reflective windows. The last thing he wanted was for one of them to get a lucky photo of his face and then publish it in a magazine.

 

Tony greeted him just as enthusiastically as he had the first time and led Xander down to his garage immediately, talking excitedly the entire way.

 

“...good trip? I considered sending Happy in a helicopter to pick you up, but then I realised that it would probably attract attention. Not to mention that the pilot would probably want to know why you were spending the day at my house, and so it would probably end up splashed across the cover of a magazine. Have you ever been in a helicopter? Amazing things, though nothing like flying in the suit.”

 

Xander laughed. “Yes, it was a good trip, and no, I haven’t ever been in a helicopter. I’ve never actually been in an airplane either.” He stopped in surprise at the sight of the two very large boxes wrapped in red paper with black ribbons wrapped around them that were sitting on the floor of Tony’s workshop. “Are they for me?”

 

“Of course.” Tony told him, running a hand over first Dum-E and then U. “It’s not your whole present of course, it’s just the part that was easiest to wrap.”

 

Xander began moving again and greeted the two robots by copying Tony’s movements. “Hey, Dum-E, hey, U.”

 

Both robots extended their armlike things to nudge him and Dum-E made a chirping noise.

 

“They like you.” Tony grinned, before waving him over to where the presents were sitting near one of the benches. “Come and open them.”

 

Each present was larger than any other Xander had ever received, well, so long as you didn’t count the mansion and car that Tony had given him. How was this his life now? 

 

“I should probably tell you that Pepper was the one to wrap them.” Tony told him, as Xander stared at them. “Which is why they don’t look as though someone rolled something in glue and then through a pile of paper. Wrapping presents is really not my specialty.”

 

Xander reached out and tentatively touched the nearest paper.

 

“No, open this one first.” Tony ordered excitedly, nudging the larger present. “They sort of go together, but this one goes first.”

 

For a moment Xander considered doing a Willow and carefully conserving every bit of wrapping paper, but he really didn’t have the patience. Instead, he found a part of the paper than he could grasp and ripped it, before tearing the rest of the paper off.

 

Xander stared at the large metal cabinet, that was painted the same colour as his car, and tried desperately to figure out what it was (and what he should say).

 

“It’s a toolkit.” Tony told him, stepping forward and beginning to open the doors in the front. “See? There are forty three different wrenches, and even more screwdrivers. Here are the pliers, and you can see all the different wrench sockets there.”

 

“How many pieces are there?” Xander asked, staring the tools in disbelief. He didn’t think that the entire workshop at Sunnydale High had that many tools.

 

“One thousand four hundred and sixty two.” Tony told him proudly, lifting up the lid. “The drills, saws, and hammers are in here, and those drawers hold all your nails, screws, and bolts.”

 

“Tony, this is amazing!” Xander reached out a hand and lifted the nearest wrench of the rack. “I don’t even know what half of this stuff does.”

 

Tony grinned. “You will once I’m done with you. Now open the other one.”

 

Xander returned the wrench to the rack, and turned to the second present. “How am I even going to get that home? Or should I leave it here?”

 

“I’ll send it down with David on Tuesday.” Tony explained. “You’ll need to use it with your second present.”

 

Xander eyed the second present with trepidation, before quickly ripping the paper off it and revealing a large metal trunk. “I, uh, what is it?”

 

“It’s an Electronics kit.” Tony told him, with a wide grin. “You know, one of those kits where you arrange the wires and batteries to make the LEDs go off?”

 

Xander shook his head. “I’ve never heard of them.”

 

“Oh,” Tony’s forehead furrowed for a moment, but then it was gone. “Well, last week you said that you were interested in learning about electronics, so I thought I’d buy you a kit for your birthday, but all of the kits were really lame, so I made you one. It’s half electronics, and half engineering. There’s even an instruction manual to help you figure everything out. There’s a bunch of different things you can make with it, none of which are as boring as turning a few LEDs on.”

 

“You made it for me?” Xander asked, lifting up the lid of the box and peering inside.

 

“Yeah, do you like it?”

 

“I love it.” Xander told him sincerely, closing the lid and turning to Tony. “It’s the most amazing thing anyone has ever given me.”

 

Tony looked pleased.

 

8-8-8

 

In the past, Xander’s birthdays had passed with very little comment by anyone other than Willow, Jesse and Buffy. So when Xander was met at the school entrance by the entire swim team, some of the basketball team, and a few members of the football team (along with what seemed to be all of the cheerleading squad) he really wasn’t sure what to make of it.

 

Cordelia squeezed his hand, before releasing it and moving to stand beside Aura - a wide smile on her face.

 

“Are you going to come quietly, Harris?” Larry asked, standing in front of the group with an almost predatory grin.

 

Xander swept his gaze across the group nervously, before returning his attention to Larry. “Come where?”

 

Percy chuckled from his position to Larry’s left. “As if you don’t know. Come on guys.”

 

“Uh,” Xander looked around desperately as the guys all stepped forward and grabbed hold of his arms, before hoisting him in the air. “What’s going on?”

 

It took Xander everything he had not to start trying to kick them all. He had no idea what was happening, but there hadn’t been anything malevolent in their expressions so they probably weren’t planning on killing him or anything. Besides, Cordelia seemed to know what was happening. 

 

“I hope you brought some dry clothes, Harris.” Hogan Martin commented, as the group carried him into the school and past all the other students.“You’re going to need them.”

 

“Oh,” Xander almost laughed in relief as he realised what was happening. 

 

How had he earnt a place in this ritual? He’d watched the senior jocks throw each other into the pool on their birthdays for years, and he’d always been half envious and half relieved that it would never be him.

 

“Uh, no, I didn’t.”

 

“Sucks to be you then.” Hogan laughed.

 

“Don’t worry, Xander.” Cordelia’s voice came from somewhere behind him. “I brought you some.”

 

A couple of the guys wolf whistled. 

 

“Been in his bedroom a bit, heh, Cordy?” Guy Matthew sniggered, from somewhere near Xander’s left foot.

 

Xander kicked out, before smirking in satisfaction when Guy yelped in complaint.

 

“Hey, watch it!”

 

Larry, Hogan, and a few of the other guys laughed.

 

“You’re lucky it wasn’t harder, Matthews.” Percy told him unsympathetically. “You know how Harris gets about Cordy.”

 

“That’s because he’s fricken whipped.” Guy told them.

 

Xander snorted. “Yeah, tell you what, Guy. When you actually manage to get a girlfriend you can comment on how I treat mine. Until then, keep your virginal mouth shut.”

 

“Just because I don’t have a weight and chain doesn’t mean I’m not getting laid, Harris!” Guy protested as the guys around them guffawed. “I bet I get more sex than you do.”

 

Xander didn’t doubt that for a moment, still that didn’t mean he needed to admit it. “Sure you do, Guy. We believe you. Right, guys?”

 

“Absolutely.” Larry agreed, as the others started laughing again.

 

“Never doubted it for a second.” Cordelia chipped in.

 

Xander smirked at the ceiling as he was carried into the pool area. Yep, he’d definitely won that round. Of course, now Guy got to throw him into the pool...so that victory probably wasn’t going to last that long.

 

Once at the side of the pool, the guys let Xander down, before Larry, Percy, Guy, and Tommy each grabbed one of his limbs and lifted him into the air again.

 

“Ready, Xander?”

 

“Would it change anything if I said no?”

 

The group watching all laughed.

 

“On three.” Larry decided. “One…”

 

Xander gulped as the four guys suddenly swung him away from the pool.

 

“Two…”

 

He really hoped they didn’t drop him, or let go when his momentum was going the wrong way.

 

“Three!”

 

Xander yelped embarrassingly loudly as he flew through the air, thankfully towards the water, but he managed to clamp his mouth shut a second before he hit the water.

 

Ow! The surface of the water was hard, and his angle of impact meant that he wasn’t able to prevent water from getting up his nose. Xander pushed his body deeper into the water to give himself the time to snort the water out of his nose, before pushing off the bottom of the pool and breaking the surface.

 

His audience were laughing and clapping and Xander shook some of the water out of his hair with a grin.

 

“How’s the water, Harris?” 

 

“Great.” Xander stripped off his overshirt, before balling it up and chucking it at Larry who dodged out of the way. Then he swam to the edge of the pool and held up a hand. “Someone give me a hand up, will you?”

 

As one the group took a step backwards. 

 

“Like we’re going to fall for that.” Percy snorted. “You’re on the swim team, get yourself out of the water.”

 

Xander rolled his eyes, but pushed himself up on his arms and levered himself onto the concrete. That done, he quickly stripped off his soaking wet singlet and chucked it at Percy’s face - grinning when the basketball player failed to duck out of the way. 

 

“Cordy? Did you bring a towel?” Xander asked hopefully.

 

By the time Xander had washed the chlorine out of his hair, dried off, and gotten dressed into the clothes that Cordelia had brought him, he was ten minutes late to his first class, but thankfully the teacher was Mr. Peters who just let him off with a warning.

 

8-8-8

 

Buffy and Willow were less than impressed to hear that he had been tossed in the pool, though Xander couldn’t tell whether it was because they disapproved of the ritual, disapproved of him having other friends, or disapproved of his choice in friends. 

 

Xander couldn’t really blame them if it was the latter. A year ago he would have disapproved of his friends too, but the guys weren’t really as bad as he had thought they were. Sure they could be thoughtless jerks, but it wasn’t as though Xander was letting them influence him to be one too. In fact, now that he was friends with them, and now that Larry was reformed, their jerky behaviour had really decreased.

 

As it turned out, despite it being his birthday (and therefore the one day of the year when he ought have gotten a free pass), Buffy and Willow approved of very little about him that day. They didn’t like his friends, they didn’t like his outfit (which Xander was pretty sure Cordelia had bought for him, because he didn’t remember owning any clothes that tight), they didn’t like the fact that he was taking Cordelia out for dinner (and so couldn’t celebrate his birthday with them until eight), and they didn’t like that he was insisting that Faith be invited to his low key birthday celebration at the Bronze.

 

Xander didn’t really care. Buffy and Willow could be as down on him as they wanted, and boy did they want, but their annoyance couldn’t ruin his fantastic week. Not only had he been given the best presents he’d ever received, but he’d also gotten to spend Sunday with Tony. Not to mention that, as uncomfortable as being thrown in the pool had been, it had also been the most fun he’d had at school all year. No monsters, no demons, no snarky comments about his choice in girlfriend, or sly digs about his intelligence, just good, old, clean fun with people who were amazingly easy to get along with. It was a good week.

 

8-8-8

 

After their training the next day, David helped Xander carry his new toolbox and electronics kit out of the moving van and into the mansion. Then they hit a snag. There was absolutely no way that they could get the two boxes up the stairs to Xander’s apartment. The stairs were just too steep and narrow.

 

Instead, with Angel’s permission, Xander pushed them out of sight from the door and against one of the stone walls before he grabbed one of the old furniture covers to hide them from Buffy when she came to visit Angel.

 

That done, Xander opened up the Electronics Kit, found the instructions for the first project - a portable solar cellphone charger - and groaned. He didn’t even know what half the words meant. Not to mention that he’d only used a soldering iron twice, both with Tony’s help, and hadn’t even known that Tony had included one in the toolkit. 

 

After frowning at the instructions for a few minutes, Xander gave up and showed them to Angel who apparently knew even less than he did. Which wasn’t entirely unexpected given that he had apparently already been a vampire for over forty years when the blow lamp was invented. (Xander had no idea how anyone had managed to solder things if they had to blow into the torch the whole time.) 

 

It gave Xander a bit more compassion for Angel’s complete technology illiteracy. The guy had been alive at the same time as Benjamin Franklin! (Though it also made the him and Buffy thing all the more weird.)

 

Xander brought his laptop down and tried googling some of the words in the instructions, but it didn’t really help. After almost an hour of googling himself in circles, Xander gave up and rang Tony who, being the absolutely coolest father than Xander could ever imagine anyone ever having, actually took three hours away from whatever he had been doing to talk Xander through the entire project. It was great and, by the end of it, Xander had his own little portable solar cellphone charger - though it looked more like a piece of scrap. Xander’s soldering skills definitely needed some more work.

 

Xander started the next project in the box, a rechargeable, hand crank flashlight, the next day, but he didn’t get very far. Not only did he not want to bug Tony with questions for the second time in as many days, but he also had six college applications to finish and submit. 

 

But, despite everything else he had to do, tinkering with the electronics kit was definitely Xander’s new favourite thing to do. When Xander spent Thanksgiving with Tony two weeks later, he was proud to be able to tell his father that he had not only submitted all of his college applications, but he had also finished the first three projects in the kit. (The last of which, a bluetooth speaker, he had actually managed to complete without any of Tony’s help.)

 

Thanksgiving with Tony was completely different from anything Xander had ever experienced. Normally he spent the day watching his parents get drunk and then fight when his dad inevitably lost money gambling on the football game. Instead, he and Tony spent the afternoon in the garage, while Tony taught Xander how to change a car’s oil, serpentine belt, spark plugs, brake pads, fuel filter and timing belt.

 

8-8-8

 

With his college applications out of the way, and no impending apocalypses, Homecoming, or SATs, Xander was glad to be able to spend the month between Thanksgiving and Christmas hanging out with his friends. He still had his trainings with David of course, and he did drive down to Malibu twice, but other than that (and his schoolwork and swim team practises), Xander had nothing better to do than hang out with the scoobies and the jocks - though never at the same time.

 

It felt weird, but the more time Xander spent with the jocks the more he found himself enjoying his time with them just as much as he did his time with the scoobies (and sometimes more). There was no danger of them replacing Buffy and Willow as his bestest friends, but they were a lot simpler. Not to mention that the list of topics that Xander needed to avoid around them was a lot shorter than it was with the scoobies. 

 

Sure he couldn’t talk about the existence of demons with them, and he still couldn’t talk about Tony, or his college applications, or the fact that he was living in the Crawford Street Mansion; but at least he didn’t need to avoid any mention of having gotten good grades in class, or his appreciation for all things Cordy, or that he was a member of the Swim Team, or the fact that he had friends aside from them. 

 

His time spent with Buffy and Willow wasn’t all bad though. In fact, so long as Xander didn’t mention anything from the long list of conversation topics that he had learnt to avoid, hanging out with the scoobies was easier than it had been in months. Xander wasn’t sure whether it was because it had been over a month since they had last had a Big Bad to research, or whether it was just because everyone was adjusting, but he was definitely enjoying the break from all the conflict. Not only were Buffy and Willow not ragging on Cordelia as much, but they also seemed to be more comfortable with Faith’s presence than they had been before. 

 

(Though Willow still got sullen and defensive whenever she saw evidence of Faith and Oz’ developing friendship. Xander didn’t understand why she got so worked up over it. Of course Faith and Oz knew each other increasingly well, they had been living in the same house for almost three months, but it didn’t mean that there was anything for Willow to be jealous about.)

 

But as much as he was enjoying his time with Buffy and Willow, and the easiness of hanging out with the jocks, Xander was increasingly finding that he prefered Cordelia’s company to anyone else’s. It made him feel terrible! When he, Willow, and Jesse had been kids they had sworn to be best friends forever and, despite the fact that Jesse had been dead for over two years, Xander had been determined to keep that promise. Except, he wasn’t sure that he could describe Willow as his best friend anymore. She was his oldest friend, yes, but Cordelia was his best friend. Or did the fact that she was his girlfriend mean that she was disqualified from being his best friend? 

 

Regardless of the semantics, by the time Christmas break came around and Cordelia left to spend their week and a half long break skiing in Aspen, Xander couldn’t ignore the fact that Cordelia was officially the most important person in his life. 

 

Thankfully, he didn’t really have time to mope around missing her. When Xander got home from farewelling her, he found Angel pacing back and forth and talking to hallucinations. Which would have been fine, but the last time Angel had had any kind of mental health day he had turned evil and tried to end the world (not to mention that Xander’s attempts to convince himself that he didn't count Angel as one of his friends was becoming less and less convincing).

 

So Xander rang Faith to ask her crazy-vampire sit, while he gathered the troops for a Christmas-eve-eve research party. As it turned out, convincing the gang of the urgency of the research party was practically effortless since apparently Buffy had wound up in one of Angel’s dreams (Xander was a little fuzzy on how that worked). 

 

Xander waited until Faith and Oz (who had volunteered to be her backup) arrived at the mansion, before heading to the library to meet Buffy, Willow, and Giles for what he hoped would be a short and informative research session. He was supposed to be spending Christmas Eve and Christmas with Tony in Malibu and he didn’t want to miss out on his first Christmas with his father.

 

It took them most of a day to come up with a possible culprit, and another day and a half to figure out where the First’s weird priest guys were hiding out so that Buffy could kick their asses, but thankfully that still kept them ahead of Xander’s deadline. And according to Faith and Oz, Buffy had managed to get rid of the First before Angel did anything stupid. (Xander wasn’t exactly sure what the First Evil had been hoping to gain from driving Angel insane.) 

 

8-8-8

 

Christmas with Tony was a lot like Thanksgiving, except with more Christmas trees, tinsel, lights, and carols. Even Dum-E and U had tinsel wrapped around them, and someone had put a santa hat on Dum-E. Tony blamed the whole thing on Pepper, but Xander suspected that his father had had more to do with it than he was admitting.

 

Tony seemed determined to give Xander the best Christmas he had ever had (not a hard task really), and he definitely succeeded. Xander had been a little worried about spending two days with his father, since it would be the longest time they had spent together, and he had been prepared to disappear into his room if Tony ever needed some space. But at no point did  Tony ever show any sign of being tired of Xander’s presence. 

 

They spend Christmas Eve in the garage, like they had Thanksgiving. Tony had Xander practise everything he had learnt before beginning to teach him the ins and outs of car engines, and then they spent their evening in front of Tony’s massive TV watching ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas’, ‘Die Hard’, and finally ‘Lethal Weapon’, before retiring to their beds. 

 

“Good morning, Master Xander.” 

 

Xander groaned at the sound of JARVIS’ voice and buried his face in his pillow.

 

“It is nine a.m. The weather in Malibu is fifty five degrees, with clear skies. The surf conditions are poor, with ankle to thigh high lines. High tide will be at one thirty seven p.m.”

 

“Does Tony even surf?” Xander mumbled into his pillow.

 

“Yes.” JARVIS told him. “However, not with the same frequency that he once did.”

 

“Oh,” Xander rolled over. “Why did you wake me up?”

 

“Sir instructed me to.” JARVIS told him. “I believe that he wishes you to join him in his workshop at your earliest convenience.”

 

Xander groaned again, but rolled himself out of bed. “Do you think he’ll mind if I have a shower first.”

 

“I do not.”

 

“Great.” Xander replied, as he gathered up some clothes and stumbled his way into his ensuite. “Can you tell him I’ll be down soon?”

 

It took Xander about ten minutes to shower, dress, and make his way down to the workshop where Tony was studying one of his blue holograms.

 

“Morning, sunshine.” Tony grinned widely, as he banished the hologram and bounced up from his stool. “Sleep well?”

 

“I did until JARVIS woke me up.” Xander told him with a yawn.

 

Tony rolled his eyes. “It’s Christmas morning! You should be glad that I let JARVIS convince me out of waking you up at six.”

 

Xander shuddered at the idea. “Thank you, JARVIS!”

 

“You are welcome, Master Xander. You will find a smoothie that Dum-E has made for you on the bench to your right.”

 

Xander turned to his right, before grinning when he saw a large plastic glass filled with purple smoothie.  “Thanks, Dum-E, it looks great!”

 

“And there isn’t even any oil in it.” Tony added, causing Xander to almost choke on his mouthful. “Now, enough of that, first things first, presents.”

 

Xander grinned. “Oh, right, Christmas.”

 

“Now he gets it.” Tony commented. “Come on. It’s in the garage. You can bring your smoothie.”

 

“The garage?” Xander questioned as he followed Tony out of the workshop. What kind of present would Tony have kept in the garage?

 

The answer to that question was apparently a brand new, red Ferrari with reflective windows.

 

“It will have to stay here, of course.” Tony explained, as Xander ran his hand over the bonnet in awe. “But so long as I’m the one who drives it out and past the paparazzi, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t take it for drives when you’re here.”

 

“It’s a Ferrari!” Xander exclaimed, for what was quite possibly the fifth time.

 

“You want to take it out for a drive now?”

 

Xander looked up from the car worriedly. “What if I dent it?”

 

“You haven’t dented the other car yet, have you?” Tony asked. “So it’s not any more likely that you’ll dent this one. Besides, if you dent it, I’ll just teach you how to fix it.”

 

8-8-8

 

When Xander got back from Malibu it was to the surprising sight of Oz, Faith and Angel all doing Tai Chi in the ground floor of the mansion. Thankfully, none of them seemed to notice him, so Xander was able to retrace his steps and use the back entrance, but it did raise some questions. Oz doing Tai Chi wasn’t exactly a surprise, he was the zennist guy Xander knew, but Tai Chi didn’t exactly seem like Faith’s speed. Not to mention that he had never seen either of them show any interest in hanging out with Angel before.

 

“Broody’s offered to help Oz control when he goes all wolfy.” Faith explained a few days later at the Bronze. “I’m just along for the ride. Besides, it’s not all bad. It’s the best workout I’ve gotten in ages.”

 

Xander shook his head skeptically. “Tai Chi? Aren’t you just moving slowly?”

 

Faith shrugged. “I don’t really get it either, but it’s like you’re pushing against the air or something. It doesn’t get my heart pounding, but it’s better than any kind of weights I’ve come across.”

 

“And Angel reckons it’ll help Oz’s werewolf stuff?”

 

“Oz’s been researching it for months.” Faith explained. “But apparently there’s not much out there, even if you know where to look. Well, not unless you’re willing to go to Tibet.”

 

“Tibet?”

 

“There’s these crazy ass monks or something.” Faith answered. “Anyway, last week, when we were watching Broody lose the plot, Oz was bitching about it. ‘pparently Broody overheard, ‘cos next thing Oz knew Angel was offering to help.”

 

“And Tai Chi will help?” 

 

Faith shrugged again. “So Broody says. Something to do with meditation. I don’t know, I’m just there to back Oz up.”

 

“And to get a workout.”

 

“And that.” Faith glanced away. “I never actually got taught how to fight, you know. Diana did what she could, but she was only around a few months. Mostly I just a punch the crap out of things and hope it works.”

 

Xander leaned forward with a frown. “Can’t Giles teach you?”

 

Faith snorted. “Sure, if he wasn’t so obsessed with B. I tried training with them a few times, but it was like staring through a store window at christmas, you know?”

 

“Yeah,” Xander nodded somberly. “I know.”

 

“B and Red don’t.” Faith commented. “Neither does C.”

 

“No,” Xander agreed. “Well, not like we do.”

 

Faith’s sober expression suddenly shifted into a wide smile. “But you’ve got Daddy Warbucks now. How was Christmas?”

 

“You’ve got the Oz’s.” Xander pointed out, before quickly dropping the subject when Faith glared at him. “And, uh, Christmas was great.” He looked around to ensure no one was listening. “He gave me a Ferrari.”

 

“A Ferrari?” Faith asked loudly. “Go Daddy Warbucks!”

 

“Shhh.” Xander said, looking around again. 

 

“What colour?”

 

“Red.” Xander admitted. “It’s amazing!”

 

“Sucks that you can’t bring it here!” Faith told him. “What I wouldn’t give to get a ride in one of those.”

 

“Maybe next year.” Xander couldn’t hide his smile. “Tony reckons that if I leave Sunnydale after grad, I should be able to drive it without too much fuss.”

 

“Sneaky.” Faith sounded impressed. “Best sort of college bribe I’ve heard of.”

 

Xander shook his head. “I actually asked him about that. He’s still convinced that I’m going to college, but he swears he didn’t mean it as any kind of bribe.”

 

“And are you? Going to college I mean?”

 

“Probably.” Xander shrugged. “The idea is growing on me.”

 

“Like an STD.” Faith shuddered. “I can’t imagine anything worse. I’m just gonna get my GED and then forget about school.”

 

“Xander?” Buffy’s voice suddenly sounded behind them. “And Faith. What are you guys doing here? Together?”

 

Xander swung around in his seat as casually as he could manage. He and Faith weren’t doing anything wrong, and he wasn’t going to let Buffy’s accusatory tone make him feel guilty.

 

“Just hanging out.” He answered evenly. “What are you doing here? Do you want to join us?”

 

Buffy glanced at the empty seat. “Sure, I guess. I’m supposed to be meeting Willow here.” She paused guiltily. “We, uh, thought you’d be busy, and I guess we were right. Cordelia should be getting back in a few days, right?”

 

Faith rolled her eyes. “Real subtle, B.”

 

“Cordy’s back in five days.” Xander said, trying not to sound to annoyed.

 

“And does she know about this?” Buffy wiggled a finger between them pointedly.

 

Now it was Xander’s turn to roll his eyes. “Of course she does. She said she would have been sorry to miss it, if the skiing hadn’t been so good in Aspen.”

 

Buffy looked almost disappointed. “Oh, did you tell her that it snowed here too?”

 

“You call that snow?” Faith asked. “Screw that! Have you seen the news reports for Boston this week? Now that’s snow.”

 

“That’s a blizzard.” Xander pointed out. 

 

“Nothing wrong with a good blizzard.” Faith told him. “Means you get to cozy up somewhere warm, with someone steamy, if you know what I mean.”

 

Xander shook his head in amusement. If there was one thing he’d learnt about Faith in the last few months is was that she made those comments, not because they were true, but to get a rise out of someone like Buffy, or Willow, or Giles. 

 

And, on cue, Buffy wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Faith, you’re sixteen! Last winter you would have been fifteen!”

 

“I’m seventeen.”

 

Xander whipped his head around to stare at her. “What? When was your birthday?”

 

“December fourteenth. 

 

“And you didn’t tell us?” Xander asked. “We would have thrown you a party! Gotten you presents and stuff. Birthdays shouldn’t just happen without people celebrating them!”

 

Faith shrugged. “It’s not really a big deal. The Oz’s made a cake.”

 

“Why didn’t Oz tell us then?”

 

“I didn’t want him to.” Faith was starting to sound defensive. “Birthdays just aren’t...really my thing, you know?”

 

“What about presents?” Xander asked. “Are birthday-plus-one-month presents your thing?”

 

Buffy rolled her eyes. “Xander, she doesn’t want anything.”

 

Faith smiled sharply. “I never turn down presents.”

 

“I’ll tell Cordy.” Xander promised. “We’ll get you thirty seven presents or something.”

 

“Thirty seven?” Faith’s eyes widened and, for a second Xander worried that she hadn’t gotten the reference. “But last year I had thirty eight!”

 

“You’re quoting Harry Potter?” Buffy asked derisively. “Xander, you’ve really got to stop infecting people with your geekiness.”

 

Faith bristled. “Actually, Harry Potter’s kind of my thing.” 

 

“You like Harry Potter?” Buffy raised an eyebrow.

 

“Yeah,” Faith crossed her arms. “What of it?”

 

“Nothing.” Buffy assured her quickly. “I’m just, uh, surprised.”

 

Faith didn’t look impressed. “Right.”

 

8-8-8

 

Tony didn’t remember much about the Thanksgivings and Christmas’ of his childhood, but he remembered them being solemn family affairs. Well, at least, they were when his parents were around and not off at some dinner or gala or holiday.

 

Then they had died in a car accident, on Christmas Eve no less, and from then on Tony’s Thanksgivings and Christmas’ had involved a lot of alcohol and parties.

 

Then the Ten Rings had taken him, and he’d spent Thanksgiving and Christmas in a cave in Afghanistan with Yinsen - building the suit that would be his way out.

 

It was hard to believe how much his life had changed in just over a year.

 

Spending Thanksgiving, and then Christmas, with Xander was amazing and Tony hoped he could do that every year. Of course there was talk in the tabloids about his absence at his usual parties, but with his PR Department’s help he was beginning to turn that talk around for good.

 

Of course, after having spent Christmas with him, Xander then went back to Sunnydale (where all the vampires and demons were) and Tony found himself missing his son’s presence. He wanted Xander safe, and with him. 

 

The first part was easy to partially fix, or at least it would have been if Tony hadn’t been finding it so hard to find a vampire to test his newly made weapon on. According to both his and JARVIS’ calculations the VampTaser should turn a vampire into dust within seconds, but there was no way he was giving Xander something he hadn’t tested. Which was a problem, because if he spent much more time hanging out at cemeteries in his Iron Man suit someone was going to notice and start asking questions.

 

But, even with the VampTaser, Xander would still be in danger - and not just from the other kind of demons. The adults in his life seemed absolutely insane!

 

There had been some hints of it before hand, of course. The very idea of an adult man sitting back and watching a teenaged superhero fight all the world’s battles alone was awful! But then it got worse, because what kind of town was made up of adults who tried to burn their kids at stakes? (Xander had claimed that it hadn’t been their fault, that demon had been messing with their minds, but Tony wasn’t convinced.)

 

And then, as though that hadn’t been enough, the stupid watcher decided to take away the teenaged superhero’s powers and make them fight vampires anyway. (At least Xander wasn’t trying to defend that as well.)

 

It was horrifying, and terrifying, and Tony really wasn’t sure how he was supposed to be dealing with it. (Though Pepper assured him that kidnapping Xander and locking him up in the workshop wasn’t an appropriate response.)

 

So, he started a countdown (there were a hundred and seventy four days, four hours, six minutes, and twenty three seconds until Xander graduated from high school and could move away from Sunnydale), spent two weeks of nights in a cemetery until he found enough vampires to test the weapon on (and, holy hell, were vampires terrifying), and gave JARVIS access to Xander’s phone so that the AI could monitor his son’s life and inform him if Xander needed help.

 

And, yeah, he knew that made him a helicopter parent, or whatever the hell they called them, but if it kept Xander alive, Tony didn’t give a crap.


	10. SeparatION

Xander balanced the weight of the small black weapon in his hand. “How close do you have to be for it to work?”

 

“Within ten feet.” Tony told him. “You’ll probably want to practise aiming it though. Here, aim it at that wall.”

 

Xander eyed the wall. “Are you sure?”

 

“Of course, just hold on a minute.” Tony turned around and grabbed a screwdriver, before striding forward and stabbing it into the wall at about chest height. “There, aim for that hole.”

 

Xander swallowed nervously. “Alright, and I just push this button?” 

 

Tony backed away from the wall. “Yeah.”

 

Xander held the weapon out in front of him, aiming it carefully at the hole in the wall, before pushing his thumb down on the button.

 

Immediately, a blue light appeared on the wall, three inches high and two inches wide of the hole, and then a bolt of lightning exploded out of the weapon and hit the blue light.

 

“Wow!” Xander stared at the smoking, black mark on the wall.

 

“There’s no recoil.” Tony pointed out excitedly. “And, with a bit of practise, the aiming should be easy. The instant the electricity hits a vampire, they’ll do their dust thing, but you should probably avoid hitting people with it. The electrical current isn’t as strong as lightning, but it’s a hell of a lot stronger than a taser so it probably won’t kill them, but it’ll hurt like hell and might cause some brain damage.”

 

“It’s amazing.” Xander told him seriously. “How does it work?”

 

“The laser creates an electromagnetic field which is strong enough to rip electrons off the air molecules in its path. The plasma then guides the electricity to the target.”

 

Xander frowned as he tried to figure out what exactly that meant. “And plasma is?”

 

“The air molecules that are missing electrons.” Tony explained. “The electrons are then used as the raw materials for the electricity.”

 

“Oh, how many, uh, goes does it have? Do you have to reload it or recharge it?”

 

“Nope.” Tony grinned proudly. “It does that all for you. You could fire it ten times in ten seconds and it still wouldn’t run out of juice.

 

Xander rubbed his thumb along the side of the weapon. “Is there a safety?”

 

“Sort of.” Tony stepped forward. “The button will only work if the thing pushing on it is between ninety three and one hundred and three degrees Farenheit, and if it can feel blood pulsing through it. So, if it’s in your pocket, you won’t be able to set it off by sitting on it or anything, and a vampire won’t be able to use it against you.”

 

Xander brought the button up to his eye. “That’s actually kind of perfect.”

 

“Yeah, well, I didn’t want you to get attacked but not be able to use it because you couldn’t get the safety off.” Tony shrugged. “But, you probably shouldn’t wear gloves. Not really a problem right now, since no one wears gloves in California, but still.”

 

“Thank you, Tony.” Xander told him, injecting as much sincerity into his voice as he could. “This is amazing!”

 

Tony swallowed. “Just stay alive.”

 

“I will.” Xander promised. “I haven’t died yet, have I? And that’s with three months of patrolling with a slayer around. Uh, speaking of the slayers, are there, um, more of these? That I could give to my friends?”

 

Tony winced. “Let’s go upstairs and talk about that over a drink, alright?”

 

Xander’s stomach dropped. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I mean, this is amazing and if I gave them one they’d probably start asking questions about where it came from and that would be bad, so…”

 

“I’m not upset.” Tony interrupted him. “Just, I have some issues around this stuff and I want to explain why.”

 

“Oh.”

 

It took them less than three minutes to grab drinks out of the fridge and find a seat in the lounge and then Xander sat quietly, with his leg jiggling as he picked at the label of his root beer, waiting for Tony to say something.

 

“Right,” Tony said eventually, leaning forward in his chair. “The first thing I need to tell you is that when I was a kid my dad had this business partner named Obadiah Stane. They were really close and, when my parents died, Obie ran Stark Industries until I turned twenty one.”

 

“He died last year, right?” Xander frowned in thought. “His plane went missing.”

 

Tony’s expression twitched. “I’ll get to that in a minute. Anyway, he kept working for the company even after I came CEO and he was pretty much the closest thing I had to family. Then, in 2009 I, uh, I was kidnapped by a terrorist organisation called the Ten Rings. They wanted me to build them a Jericho missile, but instead I built the first version of my Iron Man suit. I was there for three months and in that time I saw them do horrible things with my weapons, weapons that I had built to protect people.”

 

Xander nodded slowly, he knew most of that already.

 

“It wasn’t until I got home that I realised that,” Tony swallowed heavily. “That Obie had been selling the weapons that I designed to them, and other terrorists, for years and that he’d actually paid the Ten Rings to, to kill me.”

 

Xander stared at him in horror. That was horrible! It was like what Giles had done to Buffy, but ten times, a hundred times, worse!

 

“Then Obie tried to kill me again.” Tony continued. “And he tried to kill Pepper so I...stopped him.”

 

“So he didn’t actually die in a plane crash?”

 

“No,” Tony sighed. “There’s an agency called S.H.I.E.L.D. that’s very good at cover stories. They came up with it for me. Anyway, the reason I don’t make weapons to sell anymore is because I know how easy it is for them to fall into the wrong hands. So I only make weapons for people that I trust.”

 

Xander bit his lip. “And you trust me?”

 

“Definitely.” Tony said seriously. “But, and don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t trust your friends. Not to mention that I’m pretty uncomfortable with the idea of giving a bunch of teenagers dangerous weapons.”

 

Xander nodded slowly. “I get that. Besides, I guess they don’t really need them. Faith and Buffy are Slayers, Willow’s a witch, Oz is a werewolf, and Angel is a vampire.”

 

“It’s like an episode of Vampire Diaries.” Tony grinned.

 

“The only person who’d need one as much as I do is Cordelia.” Xander told him seriously.

 

Tony sighed. “Cordelia your girlfriend.”

 

“Who I trust one hundred percent.” Xander told him sincerely. “I know what you said, and I totally get that, but what if I vouch for her?”

 

Tony was silent for a few seconds, before eventually nodding. “Alright, I’ll give her the second one I built and make another one for me.”

 

“Really?” Xander couldn’t hide his grin. “You’d do that?”

 

“She’s your girlfriend.” Tony leaned back in his chair, and finally opened his bottle of root beer. “And I trust you.”

 

9-9-9

 

Cordelia’s response to the VampTaser was pretty much everything Xander was hoping it would be: impressed, grateful, and a confession that she would feel safer with it in her bag. Xander also felt safer knowing that he had something that could kill a vampire in seconds, though he did feel guilty that he wasn’t able to give the rest of the scoobies one too. Still, he could understand where Tony was coming from and it was Tony’s choice who got to use his weapons.

 

Besides, Buffy and Faith would probably turn their noses up at such a modern, and hands off, approach to slaying vampires - something that Faith proved to be true when Xander and Cordelia told her about the VampTasers at lunch few days later.

 

“It’d take away all the fun.” Faith complained, sprawling on the grass. 

 

“Not to mention the high risk of death.” Xander added dryly. 

 

“Yeah, well, I can see why it might be useful for you guys.” Faith admitted. “I like a good tumble though. Like last night, man, could those little goblin things throw a punch. I still say that me and B could have taken them. Red’s spell almost made it too easy.”

 

“What?” Xander swallowed heavily and glanced towards Cordelia. “What happened last night?”

 

“Oh, there was this nest of these creepy, grey goblins out in the caves.” Faith explained animatedly. “You guys missed a great slaying session last night. Pity you guys had the...uh, what exactly were you doing? Buffy kind of mumbled when she was explaining it.”

 

Xander clenched his jaw. “What exactly did Buffy say?”

 

“Just that you couldn’t be there ‘cos you were busy doing something.” Faith shrugged. “I figured you were hanging out with your other friends or something.”

 

“Or something.” Cordelia said flatly.

 

“I was at home working on my English essay.” Xander said. “No one told us that something was happening.”

 

“Huh?” Faith sat up in her seat and looked between them. “But Buffy said…”

 

“Buffy lied.” Xander snapped angrily, before sighing. “Sorry, it’s not your fault.”

 

“Don’t apologise, I’d be pissed too.” Faith told him. “Hell, I am fricking pissed. B lied to me?”

 

Cordelia crossed her arms. “I don’t know why you’re both acting so surprised.”

 

Xander glared at her. “Because Buffy’s my friend!”

 

“I can’t believe she fricking lied to me.” Faith muttered. “Why would she…?”

 

“That’s what I’d like to know.” Xander interrupted. 

 

“Maybe because she’s a bitch.” Cordelia suggested pointedly.

 

Xander shot her a dirty look because, while it wasn’t as though he didn’t know what Cordy thought of Buffy, and it wasn’t that he didn’t at least partially agree, but it wasn’t exactly helpful right now.

 

He glanced at his watch, before sighing. As tempting as it was to go and find Buffy to confront her, there was no way he would be able find her in the five minutes they had until the end of lunch. Besides, maybe if he waited a few hours and confronted her after school he would have managed to calm down a bit.

 

It wasn’t to be. In fact, if anything, the two classes that Xander had before the end of school just gave him more time to stew in his anger, and by the time he found Buffy and Willow sitting together on one of the benches in front of the school entrance was barely holding onto his temper.

 

“Xander,” Willow greeted him with a smile. “We didn’t see you at lunch.”

 

“Cordy and I had lunch with Faith.” Xander answered stiffly, before glaring at Buffy. “She told us about last night.”

 

Buffy and Willow both winced. “Oh.”

 

“Yeah, oh.” Xander crossed his arms. “How could you not tell me and Cordy about it?”

 

Buffy rolled her eyes. “I’m not sure why you’re getting so upset about it. It’s not like it’s a big deal.”

 

“Not a big deal?” Xander asked loudly. “Really? That’s what you’re going with?”

 

Buffy and Willow exchanged a glance.

 

“Xander,” Willow started soothingly. “It’s not that we didn’t want you there…”

 

“Because we totally did.” Buffy chipped in. 

 

“It’s just that, we were worried that you might get hurt.” Willow finished.

 

“Yeah, because I’m much more breakable that you.” Xander snapped sarcastically. “Who was it who ended up in hospital last year?”

 

“I’m a witch!” Willow defended loudly, before looking around quickly to check that no one had heard her. 

 

Xander snorted. “Yeah, ‘cos the ability to float pencils is definitely going save your life.”

 

“It might!”

 

Xander rolled his eyes, before turning back to Buffy. “So you just suddenly decided that it was too dangerous for me to be there? How is it anymore dangerous that it was a year ago?”

 

“It’s not.” Buffy admitted. But now that Faith’s in town you don’t need to put yourself in danger all the time.”

 

“Did it ever occur to you that maybe I like putting myself in danger?” Xander snapped. “Well, not the danger part, but how am I supposed to just sit back and watch when I know all the stuff that’s happening around me? Isn’t that what you were whining about when you lost your powers?”

 

Buffy surged to her feet, forcing Xander to take a step back. “Whining? You think I was whining? My powers had disappeared! I was as helpless as…”

 

“As me!” Xander finished for her. “But you didn’t curl up at home, out of danger, did you? No, you went and fought the vampire all on your own. At least I’m smart enough to take backup.”

 

“Take backup?” Buffy repeated laughingly. “Xander, you  _ are  _ the backup. No, you’re not even that. You’re the guy who gets in the way and then falls over when he’s trying to get away.”

 

“Oo oo, he’s like Shaggy!” Willow added excitedly. “You know, from Scooby Doo.”

 

Xander bit his tongue in an attempt to prevent himself from yelling at them. “Nice to know what you think of me.”

 

Buffy winced. “Look, Xander, the thing is that now that Faith’s around we don’t need you to keep putting yourself in danger.”

 

“You had no right to make that decision for me.” Xander told her.

 

“No right? Xander, I’m the Slayer. I have every right to decide who gets involved. I’m pretty much the only person who does have the right.”

 

“You’re not  _ the  _ Slayer, you’re  _ a  _ slayer.” Xander pointed out. “Remember that time you died and I saved your life. And just so you know, Faith knows that you lied to her and she’s about as happy about it as I am.” 

 

“I don’t even see why you’re getting so upset about this.” Buffy sighed. “It’s not like you even hang out with us much anymore. You’re too busy with Cordelia, and Faith, and your new friends.”

 

“Are you kidding me?” Xander exploded. “I spend more time with you than I do with anyone other than Cordy who, just in case you forgot, is my girlfriend! How much time does Willow spent with Oz? How much time did you spend with Angel? Not to mention that you guys have stopped inviting me to things. Just because you can’t handle that fact that you’re not my only friends anymore, doesn’t give you the right to cut me out!

 

“Xander, we’re not cutting you out.” Buffy rolled her eyes. “We’re just making sure that you’re safe.”

 

9-9-9

 

“I know I’m probably supposed to get angry on your behalf,” Tony commented over the phone, after Xander had told him what had happened. “But, honestly, if it keeps you safer…”

 

“What is it with people and wanting me to be safe all of a sudden?” Xander asked in frustration. “I’ve been fighting demons with Buffy for two years and I haven’t been seriously hurt once!”

 

“But all it would take is one bad day.”

 

“You can’t tell me you don’t understand what it’s like to want to help out.” Xander pointed out. “You’ve got your Iron Man suit.”

 

“Which makes me basically invulnerable.”

 

Xander grimaced. “It’s not like Buffy’s not risking her life every time she fights too. She’s already died once. Why does she get to risk her life, and I don’t?”

 

“If it was up to me, none of you would be risking your lives.” Tony told him. “You’re kids.”

 

Xander sighed. “We’re eighteen. And I can’t just sit back and pretend that I don’t know that there are evil things out there killing people. I’ve got to do something.”

 

“Do you?” Tony asked. “I mean, sure it’s terrible, but if they don’t need you, do you really need to keep putting yourself in danger?”

 

“Yes!” Xander snapped. “What sort of person would I be if I didn’t?”

 

“A sensible one.” Tony replied. “Look, let’s take vampires out of the scenario here. You don’t think that everyone in, I don’t know, Chicago, knows that there are people being murdered regularly in alleys? Does that mean that everyone and their grandmother goes out to try and stop them? No, because it’s not their job and they’re not trained for it.”

 

Xander squeezed his eyes shut. “I can’t just do nothing.”

 

“I know the feeling.” Tony sighed. “As to your friends, well, I’ve got to say that they don’t sound all that great. And it seems like they’ve been doing this sort of crap all year.”

 

Xander opened his mouth to defend them, before realising that he had nothing to say on their behalfs. “Yeah. I don’t know what happened. We used to be so close, but now it’s like we’re always fighting and, when we’re not fighting, it’s because I’m making sure I don’t mention anything that will upset them. I can’t do anything right in their eyes this year, but then they’d probably say the same thing about me.”

 

“I know I’ve said this before,” Tony started. “But you’ll make new friends at college.”

 

“Yeah,” Xander agreed sadly. “Except I wanted to be friends with them for the rest of my life.”

 

9-9-9

 

Xander arrived at school the next morning prepared to spend the day pointedly ignoring Buffy and Willow, but then he saw their worried expressions. Clearly something hellmouthy was going on. So, after double checking his theory with Oz (who confirmed that Willow had said, that Buffy had said, that Giles had said, that the Sisterhood of Jhe were going to try and open the hellmouth), Xander swallowed his pride and approached them with an offer to help.

 

Then they sent him out for doughnuts and Xander was done. He picked up the doughnuts of course, it would have been petty not to, but after he’d dropped them off (and confirmed that there was nothing else they wanted him to do) he walked out of the library and didn’t look back. 

 

Then he rang Cordy (who he’d barely seen all day) and asked her if her evening was free. He needed to do something interesting, if he didn’t then he’d spend the entire night worrying about the end of the world (and feeling sorry for himself). 

 

Cordelia arrived at the mansion an hour later looking paler than Xander had ever seen her, but she greeted Xander with a smile and a kiss as she usually did.

 

“Where were you today?” Xander asked, as they settled down on the couch. “You just disappeared at lunch.”

 

Cordelia shifted, so that she was resting against Xander’s side, and leaned her head against his shoulder. “I was around. How was your day? Did you make up with Buffy and Willow?”

 

Xander looked down at her in concern, it wasn’t like Cordelia to deflect a question so clumsily. “Not really. You know those demon they fought without us? Apparently they’re trying bring about a big, scary apocalypse thing. I offered to help, but they just sent me out for doughnuts. Apparently I’m not even good for research any more. Tony says that some friendships don’t last forever and that I’ll make new friends at college.”

 

Cordelia leaned her cheek against his chest. “So you’re definitely going to college then?”

 

“Yeah,” Xander said, letting out a deep breath. “I guess so. I was thinking that we could maybe go together.”

 

Cordelia didn’t say anything.

 

“Or, if not together, like in the same town or something.” Xander added quickly. “But we don’t have to, if you don’t want to.”

 

“I’m not going to college.”

 

Xander frowned down at her. “What do you mean? Of course you’re going to college. You applied to, like, ten of them. You were the one who helped convince me that I wanted to go.”

 

Cordelia’s breath hitched. “Apparently Daddy’s hasn’t paid his taxes in twelve years. He’s been charged with tax evasion and they’ve taken away everything. We only get to keep the house because it’s in Mom’s name.”

 

Xander rubbed Cordelia’s arm comforting, as her breathing continued to hitch. It sounded as though she was barely managing to contain her sobs. 

 

“Mom’s already filed the divorce papers. She thinks Daddy’s going to prison.” Cordelia’s tears were soaking into Xander’s shirt. “I asked to her to sell the house, so that I could go to college - it’s not like she needs twelve bedrooms - but she said no. She said that she needed it all to help her find her third husband. She doesn’t even care that I’ll be left without anything!”

 

“When did you find out?” Xander asked awkwardly.

 

“Two days a-ago.” Cordelia’s voice broke, and her sobs became audible. “I...I don’t know what I’m going to do. Everyone’s going to find out and…”

 

“Why?” Xander interrupted. “Couldn’t we just not tell them?”

 

Cordelia sniffed. “Percy’s dad is one of Daddy’s business partners.”

 

“So we tell Percy to keep his mouth shut.” Xander decided. “It’s not like it’s anyone’s business.”

 

Cordelia shook her head against his chest. “He won’t listen. Besides it’s not like it even matters.” Her breathing hitched again. “I’m never going to go to college.”

 

“I’ll pay for you to go.” Xander offered.

 

Cordelia sat up so fast her head almost hit Xander’s chin. “What? You think I’m some kind of charity case?” She poked Xander’s chest with her finger. “Well, think again, Mister! Mom might be willing to sell herself off to the highest bidder, but I…”

 

“I mean, I’ll lend it to you.” Xander corrected quickly, trying not wince at the sight of Cordelia’s red and puffy eyes. “You can repay me back when you’ve graduated and are earning money and stuff. It’s not like I’ll even miss it.”

 

Cordelia narrowed her eyes at him. “I bet you think you’re so special now that you’re the rich kid on campus.”

 

Xander shook his head desperately. “Of course not! Come on, Cordy, you know me better than that. I was just trying to help.”

 

Cordelia’s angry expression crumbled as she slumped back against him. “I’m sorry.” Her entire body was wracked with sobs. 

 

Xander wrapped his arm around her held her close. “I mean it, though. I’ll pay for your college tuition if you need me to.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because I love you.” Xander told her. “Because, thanks to Tony, I have more money than I know what to do with. Because I’m hoping to go to college with you next year. Because,” He swallowed nervously. “I’m hoping that I’ll get to spend the rest of my life with you, which would just make it it a good investment.”

 

Cordelia turned her head to look up at him. “You think about the future like that?”

 

“All the time.” Xander admitted. “I know that it’s stupid, since we’re way too young for that sort of thing, but I really want to marry you one day.”

 

“Me too.” Cordelia mumbled into his shirt.

 

Xander tightened his arm around her as his heart soared with joy. “You do?”

 

“Yeah, and not just as my first husband.” Cordelia added. “I don’t want to be like Mom.”

 

“I may be a bit biased here, but I don’t want you to be like your mom either.” Xander smiled.

 

“She thinks you’re cute.” Cordelia told him. “Apparently you remind her of a pool boy that her parents had when she was my age. If she ever finds out about you being Tony Stark’s son she’ll probably try and convince you to become her third husband.”

 

Xander shuddered. “I didn’t need to know that.”

 

Cordelia choked out a laugh. “No, neither did I.”

 

There was a long pause, before Xander decided to bring the conversation back on topic. “So, it sort of makes sense for me to pay for your college stuff.”

 

“But what if we break up?” Cordelia asked. “Wouldn’t it make things awkward?”

 

Xander frowned. “I guess. Maybe we could ask Tony. He might have some ideas. I’m going down to see him again on Sunday. Do you want to come?”

 

Cordelia sat up and stared at him. “You’re inviting me to go meet Tony Stark? Are you sure he won’t mind?”

 

Xander shrugged. “Yeah, I mean, I know he’s interested in meeting you, and it’s not like I haven’t met your parents.”

 

9-9-9

 

When Xander woke up the next morning, it to the wonderful sight of Cordelia sleeping next to him. She was dressed in a pair of his pajamas of course, there was no way Cordy would have agreed to stay otherwise, but the sight of her in his bed was just perfect.

 

He watched her sleep for a few minutes, glad that she was looking calmer than she had the previous evening, before reaching for his phone to check his messages. A few seconds later he was nudging Cordelia urgently.

 

“Cordy, wake up! Someone blew up the school last night!”

 

Cordelia mumbled a complaint, before her eyes suddenly opened. “What?”

 

Xander was scanning through the different messages he had received to try and get a better idea of what had happened.

 

“Larry says that school’s cancelled because someone blew it up. Buffy says the same thing, except that the bomb mostly just damaged the boiler room, and that last night’s apocalypse has been resolved.”

 

“The apocalypse was last night?” Cordelia asked, pushing herself further up her pillow. “And they didn’t call us?”

 

Xander was trying to ignore that. “Willow says no one was hurt and wants to know if I want to hang out today.”

 

Cordelia sniffed haughtily. “She’s probably just trying to crawl back into your good books.”

 

“Yeah,” Xander sighed, and laid back down beside her. “I don’t really want to see her. Or Buffy.”

 

Cordelia shifted until her head was resting against his shoulder. “What do you want to do?”

 

“I don’t know. Maybe we could go down and see Tony.” Xander suggested. “Or I could chat with Percy, see if he’d be willing not to mention what’s going on with your dad.”

 

“Screw Percy.” Cordelia told him. “So what if he talks? I’m Cordelia Chase. I can handle anything he wants to throw at me.”

 

Xander reached for her hand and squeezed it. “Very true. Anything we should do to get ready? Like pre-battle preparations or something?”

 

“I love you, Xander Harris.” Cordelia pushed herself up on her elbow and kissed him. 

 

Xander wasn’t sure what he’d said to deserve Cordelia’s burst of affection but, as he pushed himself up to deepen the kiss, he decided that he didn’t care.

 

9-9-9

 

As it turned out, Tony was busy that morning and wouldn’t be able to see them until after lunch. He was apologetic about it, though Xander wasn’t really sure why, and suggested that they could still drive down earlier and spend their morning perusing the Malibu malls.

 

Xander didn’t think that he could've come up with a plan that he was less enthused about (except for spending the morning with Willow), but Cordelia seemed excited about the idea so they were on the road within an hour. 

 

It was the first time that Xander had driven himself all the way to Malibu, since Happy normally met him in Oxnard, but thankfully Tony had installed a top of the line, Stark Industries GPS into his car which guided them in the right direction.

 

The first mall they stopped at wasn’t in Malibu at all, but was in Thousand Oaks which was about halfway between Oxnard and Malibu. The outside of the mall was intimidating, looking more like a fancy hotel than anything, but Cordelia didn’t seem cowed by it at all.

 

Xander was impressed. There was no way he would have guessed that her family had just gone bankrupt if he hadn’t already been told. She strode through the mall with just as much confidence as she usually did, despite the fact that it taken Xander most off the hour long drive to convince her to let him buy her the things she normally would have bought herself. 

 

They spent two hours at the The Oaks Shopping Centre, in which time Cordelia managed to find herself a dress, pair of shoes, and a blouse, and Xander three pairs of very tight jeans, four shirts, and a jacket that she assured him could (and should) be worn at places other than a formal dance, before driving the half an hour to the Malibu Country Mart.

 

The Malibu Country Mart couldn’t have been more different from The Oaks if it had tried. It was sort of rustic and had funny little statues all over the place. There were monkeys on a seat, sheep doing the cancan, and a jester who seemed to be spilling water out of three teacups. It also had good clothes shops though, at least Cordelia seemed to think so, and Xander barely managed to convince her to agree to sit down at a cafe for lunch.

 

Eventually, a few hours, and more than a few new outfits, later it was time for them to meet Happy so that he could drive them to Tony’s house. Xander tried to keep his relief from his face but, from the half amused, half guilty expression on Cordelia’s face, he didn’t think that he had been successful.

 

According to Happy, the drive from the Country Mart to Tony’s place would only take ten minutes and within five minutes of their drive Cordelia’s grip on his hand was like a vice.

 

“What if he doesn’t like me?” Cordelia whispered, glancing nervously at Happy.

 

Xander frowned, unused to seeing any kind of insecurity from her. “Of course he’s going to like you. You’re Cordelia Chase.”

 

Cordelia bit her lip. “I know, but he’s Tony Stark.”

 

Xander rubbed his thumb across her hand. “Yeah, I know. That part is still kind of terrifying for me too.”

 

As nervous as Cordelia was, Xander was dreading her seeing the paparazzi outside Tony’s gate - regardless of how many times he had visited Tony they still made him nervous. But strangely the sight of the paparazzi actually seemed to calm Cordelia down and by the time Happy parked the car in front of the mansion she seemed back to her usual confident self.

 

Tony bounded out the front door a few seconds later, a huge grin on his face, and Xander quickly scrambled out of the car to greet him.

 

“Hey, Tony.”

 

“Hey,” Tony returned, before looking around dramatically. “Where’s this famous girlfriend of yours? I was starting to think that you had made her up. Why else would you have never brought her to meet me? Not to mention that from what you’ve told me she’s way out of your league and, wow,” He paused as Cordelia stepped out of the car. “You were definitely right. Waaay out of your league. What are you thinking dating him?”

 

Cordelia made a point of looking at the mansion behind him. “I don’t know, he certainly has some things going for him.” She brought her gaze back to Tony. “Not to mention that the men in his family clearly age well.”

 

Xander stepped forward with a grimace. “Cordy, I already have the knowledge that your mom thinks I’m cute burnt into my brain, I don’t need the fact that you think my father’s cute burnt in there alongside it.”

 

“Of course I’m cute.” Tony smirked. “I’m more than cute, I’m sexy. I’m the sexiest man alive according to People’s Magazine.”

 

Cordelia stepped forward until she was standing next to Xander. “I don’t know about that,” She said, slipping her hand into Xander’s. “I prefer the younger model.”

 

Tony’s mouth dropped open in shock, before the edges turned up in a grin.

 

It didn’t come as any surprise to Xander that Cordelia and Tony got along like a house on fire. Both of them had similar senses of humour and were equally unconcerned with what the general population thought of them. It was nice to see them interacting and, while he’d been a little worried they might get along so well that he felt left out, that never happened.

 

Tony showed Cordelia around the house, and then around the workshop, before finally showing her his garage where Xander’s ferrari was sitting alongside of all Tony’s equally expensive cars. All in all the tour took almost half an hour, but eventually they were all sitting on the chairs in front of the gigantic fishtank with colds drinks in their hands.

 

“You said there was something you wanted to talk to me about?” Tony asked, leaning back against his chair.

 

Xander exchanged a look with Cordelia who was sitting beside him, before turning back to Tony. “Yeah.”

 

“You’re not getting married are you?” Tony asked, leaning forward suddenly. “Because you are definitely,  _ definitely _ too young.”

 

Xander barked out a laugh. “No, no marriages today. We haven’t even graduated from high school yet.”

 

Tony looked relieved, as he slouched back against his chair. “Alright then. So what’s going on?”

 

Xander swallowed nervously. “The thing is that, uh…”

 

“My father has been charged with tax evasion.” Cordelia explained simply.

 

“Right,” Xander nodded. “And so I said that I’d pay for her college tuition, but then we thought that might make things awkward in the future.”

 

“No kidding.” Tony commented.

 

“So I thought I’d ask if you had any ideas.” Xander finished, squeezing Cordelia’s hand nervously.

 

Tony frowned. “Well, first, I’ve got to tell you that tax evasion is the least of your father’s problems right now. He has been charged with tax evasion but, despite being a felony, it’s not the main charge - Insider Trading is.”

 

“What? How do you know that?”

 

Tony’s eyes flicked towards Xander. “JARVIS keeps track of the people that are important to me. When I found out about Xander, I added you and his other friends to the list.”

 

Cordelia’s expression was pinched. “So what does that mean for Daddy?”

 

“It means that he could spend up to twenty years in a federal prison.” Tony told her, before wincing when Cordelia’s expression crumbled. “But it probably won’t be that much. It’s more likely to be around ten years.”

 

“What was he thinking?” Cordelia asked indignantly. “Didn’t he care that he was risking everything?!”

 

Tony looked uncomfortable. “But, uh, regarding your college tuition issues - I’ll start up a scholarship fund for California colleges (you were planning on going to a California college, weren’t you?) and you can be be one of my first recipients.”

 

9-9-9

 

It took a week and a half for the school to be declared safe for students again, and Xander and Cordelia spent most of that time together at the mansion avoiding Buffy and Willow. They spend the first few days in Xander’s apartment, talking, finishing their homework, and making out, before starting to spend more and more time on the bottom floor with Angel. On their fourth day off school, Oz and Faith were there, practising their Tai Chi stuff with Angel, and then they just never left except to go home each night (and in Oz’s case to hang out with Willow).

 

If felt weird, almost as though they were starting a new group without Buffy or Willow, but Xander knew that that wasn’t true. After all, while he and Cordelia might have been being cut out of the group (however much Buffy and Willow might deny it), Oz was Willow’s boyfriend, and Angel was Buffy’s...whatever it was that they were calling it now, and Faith was Buffy’s sister/rival slayer. 

 

If the group split up, as was looking more and more likely, Xander doubted anyone would follow him and Cordy. The others were still integral, and  _ useful  _ members of the Scooby Gang. Still, it was nice to hang out with them all.

 

The only awkward part was when, on the day before school started back, Cordelia and Faith both forgot that Oz didn’t know about Tony and so accidently let the cat out of the bag. The information that Xander was Tony Stark’s son actually managed to flap the unflappable Oz, but but he promised not to tell anyone - and especially not Willow.

 

Xander didn’t really understand it. He didn’t think he would have agreed to keep a secret of that magnitude from Cordelia, especially not a secret regarding one of her best friends. But then he also wouldn’t have spent the majority of their impromptu week off school hanging out with people that weren’t Cordy. 

 

9-9-9

 

School started back on a Monday and, as Xander got dressed for the day, the knowledge that he would be seeing Buffy and Willow for the first time since they had excluded him had him pulling on his letterman jacket in a fit of pique. He had never actually worn his letterman for anything other than official swim team stuff, because him wearing it would remind them that he was on the swim team, but he wasn’t sure he cared anymore.

 

He’d arranged to pick Cordy up from her house (since the IRS had taken her car) and, if the hickey she gave them while they were parked outside her house was anything to go by, she approved of his wardrobe choices. Well, either that or she was trying to piss Buffy and Willow off as well. Xander thought that it was probably a mixture of the two.

 

Walking into school in a letterman jacket that in no way hid the hickey on his neck and Cordelia at his side in the hottest dress that she had bought in Malibu, felt both strange and wonderful. How was he now this guy? The one who all the younger students stared at in awe and the older students all acknowledge with a nod, fist bump, or actual greeting?

 

He knew that at least half the stares were probably due to the fact that the news about Cordy’s dad’s arrest had gotten around, but none of the looks felt malicious or mocking. Well, not until they met Buffy, Willow, and Oz in the corridor near their lockers.

 

“Really, Xander?” Buffy asked, eyeing Xander’s jacket in disdain. “Don’t you think it’s a little much?”

 

Cordelia smirked scornfully. “I didn’t see you minding the letterman jacket last year when you were cozying up to Cameron Walker.”

 

“Is that a hickey?!” Willow squeaked suddenly.

 

Cordelia’s smirk turned smug. “What can I say, I like a man in a letterman.”

 

Buffy snorted. “A man? Putting it on a little strong there, Cordy.”

 

“Where’ve you been, anyway, Xander?” Willow asked, leaning back against Oz who was watching the confrontation with a flat expression. “You didn’t reply to my texts all week! And when I went around to your house your mom told me that you were out.”

 

“I was hanging out with Cordy.” Xander told her, forcing himself not to glance towards Oz.

 

Willow’s nose wrinkled. “Well, why didn’t you reply to my texts? We could have hung out.”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Why do you think he didn’t call you? Maybe we just didn’t feel like hanging out with people who lied to us.”

 

Buff shot her an incredulous glare. “You can’t seriously still be upset about that. It was weeks ago.”

 

“A week and a half ago.” Xander corrected, tightening his hand on Cordelia’s hip.

 

“Is that why you’re all…” Buffy waved her hand towards them. “You’re trying to spite us because we hurt your feelings? Grow up, Xander!”

 

Xander shook his head. “Not everything’s about you, Buffy.”

 

Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. “Why else would you be wearing a letterman jacket and walking around like you think you’re Finn Hudson.”

 

Xander frowned in confusion, who was Finn Hudson?

 

“Finn?” Cordelia asked. “That’s the best you could come up with? Xander is totally Nate Archibald.”

 

Buffy and Willow both looked incredulous.

 

“Nate? Really?” Buffy asked. “Are you blind or something?”

 

“Hey, Xander!” Percy called suddenly from across the hall. “You and Cordy up for a party at mine tonight? Or are you hanging with the geeks again?”

 

Xander turned towards him with a grin, relieved to have an escape from the conversation that was no longer making any sense to him. “Sounds great!” He called back, after quickly glancing at Cordelia to check. “Count us in.”

 

“Hanging with the geeks?” Willow spluttered. “We’re not geeks, are we? Oz, are we geeks?”

 

Buffy raised an eyebrow. “You let him arrange your social calendar now, Cordy?”

 

“Being a geek isn’t a bad thing.” Oz told Willow comfortingly. 

 

Cordelia eyed Buffy disdainfully. “I trust Xander, unlike some people.”

 

9-9-9

 

Tony couldn’t help but be excited when Xander rang and asked if he and his girlfriend could come visit him for the day. He’d been wanting meet Cordelia for months, but hadn’t wanted to mention it to Xander in case he came off too pushy. It was frustrating to realise that he had a board meeting to attend (even if he was only attending it by video conference), but at least it would be over by the end of lunch.

 

Cordelia was like a breathe of fresh air and it had been great to have the opportunity to watch Xander interact with someone other than Tony, Pepper, Happy or the AIs. Tony hadn’t been particularly impressed by what he’d heard about most of Xander’s friends (despite never having met them he had put Buffy and Willow into the same category as Justin Hammer), but Cordelia seemed sort of perfect for Xander. 

 

Watching them interact, Tony thought they looked a bit like a married couple - the happy kind. It actually made Tony feel sort of lonely. He’d never wanted to get married. He’d seen how cold and formal his parents’ marriage had been and had never wanted to inflict that on anyone he knew. Not to mention that he’d never really met anyone who he’d been remotely tempted to spend the rest of his life with. 

 

Other than Pepper. 

  
  



	11. PreventION

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.N. Oops, this is a day late sorry. I live in New Zealand we had a public holiday yesterday (ANZAC day) and the change of routine got me all confused.

 

Xander wasn’t sure what to think when Faith asked him and Cordy if they wanted to patrol with her. He knew that Faith was still angry with Buffy for lying to her (he was still mad at Buffy too), but Faith had never shown any interest in patrolling with anyone aside from Buffy.

Still, regardless of Faith’s reasons, there was no way Xander was going to turn the opportunity to go out and patrol again - especially since it would give him the opportunity to put the VampTaser and his developing fighting skills to the test. Cordy was less enthused by the idea, claiming that she had actually been enjoying not having any reason to walk around looking for vampires, but she agreed to come along anyway.

It felt nice to be patrolling again, but also weird to be doing it without Buffy or Willow. There also seemed to be something symbolic about it. Almost as though it represented the fact that Buffy, and Willow weren’t his best friends anymore. Or at least, he didn’t think they were. It was hard to tell, but given everything that had happened recently, and the fact that he prefered pretty much anyone else’s company other theirs, he was betting on the fact that their best-friendship was over.

Which was sad, really sad, and a little hard to deal with. Though he knew that at least part of it was his fault. He was the one who had decided to date Cordelia, and befriend people they didn’t like, and not tell them about Tony, and (most recently) get mad at them for leaving him out.

“...exciting.”

Xander looked over at Cordelia. “What’s exciting?”

“Don’t you know you’re supposed to pay attention on a patrol?” Faith asked, rolling her eyes. “I swear, a vamp could have just walked right up to you and you wouldn’t have even noticed it.”

“I’m focussed.” Xander defended quickly. “I’m totally focussed.”

“Sure you are.” Faith smirked. “Tell us what we’re talking about then?”

Xander winced. “Uh, something exciting? I didn’t quite catch what though.”

“March is exciting.” Cordelia explained, as though it was obvious.

“And March is exciting because?”

“Because it’s when we find out whether we got into college or not.” Cordelia reminded him.

“Oh, right.” Xander nodded. “I remember now. Colleges, yay.”

Faith gave him a searching look. “Not so keen?”

“Oh, I’m keen,” Xander told her, stepping around a gravestone. “I’m a super keen bean. I’m just not looking forward to getting a heap of thin little envelopes telling me ‘thanks, but no thanks’. I liked it better when I didn’t care.”

“What changed your mind?” Faith asked curiously.

“Buffy.” Cordelia sniffed contemptuously. “And Willow. He finally got sick of them treating him like their little golden retriever and wants to get out.”

“Hey!” Xander protested. “There is absolutely nothing little about me.”

Faith paused and ran her eyes down his body with a smirk. “Oh, I’m sure.”

“Eyes off my man, Faith.” Cordelia snarked, before suddenly gasping. “And, maybe on the vampire behind you.”

Faith spun around on one foot and kicked out at the vampire, who looked like he’d escaped from a medieval fair, with her other one - pushing him back a few feet. “Get back.”

Xander stepped backward, almost tripping over a headstone, before noticing a second vampire, dressed the same as the first one, that was was stepping out from behind a mausoleum a few feet away from Cordy.

“Cordy, behind you!” He yelled a warning, scrambling in his pocket for his VampTaser.

Cordy spun around, her VampTaser already in her hand, and pointed it at the vampire.

The vampire sneered, stepping towards her with a raised sword, before lightning shot out of the weapon and hit the him in the stomach.

“Nice one.” Xander congratulated Cordelia, as the vampire turned to dust, before flinching when a heavy hand landed on his shoulder and spun him around.

Xander stared in horror as the newest vampire addition to their party grinned down at him. Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap! He was going to die!

“Xander!” Cordelia shrieked, and the sound was enough to jolt Xander out of his fear.

This was exactly the kind of situation that he’d been training for with David. All he need to do was not panic and figure out what to do. The vampire was close, really, really close, which meant...uh…

Xander twisted as much as he could with the vampire’s arm on his shoulder, before kicking out at the vamp’s left knee cap. It was like kicking concrete, but the vampire’s grip on his shoulder loosened enough for Xander to be able to slip out of it and dart a few steps away.

The vampire snarled and lunged at him, but Xander stepped away and punched the vampire in the nose. The sound of the crunch was satisfying, but now Xander’s hand hurt even more than his foot did. Damn it, why did vampires have to be so solid?

Taking a step back, the vampire smirked and drew a sword from the scabbard at his side.

Xander blanched. David hadn’t taught him anything about fighting swords. “Faith!”

“Xander, use your taser!” Cordy yelled, from about ten feet to his right.

“Oh, right,” Xander ran backwards a few steps as he retrieved the VampTaser from his pocket.

The vampire stalked towards him. “Let’s settle this honorably.”

Xander pointed the VampTaser at him. “No, see, I think you have an unfair advantage, being all super strengthy and all.” He pushed the button and blinked as the almost painfully bright lightning hit the vampire, turning him to dust.

“Nice one.” Faith commented, as she and Cordelia approached him.

“It sort of felt like cheating.” Xander admitted, as Cordelia reached out for his hand.

Faith snorted dismissively. “No such thing. Besides, it looked like you got in a good punch beforehand.”

Xander shook out his hand. “And let me just say, ouch! Why do vampires’ heads have to be so hard?”

“I wanna know why they were carrying swords.” Faith commented, picking up the sword and dagger that had fallen on the ground when Xander had dusted the vampire. “If anything’s cheating, that is.”

“At least they weren’t carrying guns.” Xander pointed out, as they all started walking again.

“Guns?”.

“Darla, the vampire who made Angel, tried to kill Buffy with a gun once.” Xander explained.

“Screw that!” Faith grimaced.

“She’s dead now though right.” Cordelia asked.

Xander squeezed her hand. “Yeah, Angel staked her when she tried to kill him and Buffy.”

“That must have sucked for him.” Faith commented.

“Yeah, I guess.” Xander frowned. “I wasn’t exactly Angel’s biggest fan back then, so I didn’t really care. It was just after we found out he was a vampire.”

“Oh, that’s right.” Faith grinned. “You said that B didn’t find out until he went all vampy when they were making out. What I wouldn’t give to have seen that.”

10-10-10

The next morning, Xander woke up to a text from Willow, a text from Larry, and an email from Whittier College announcing his admission into their college.

He didn’t know how many times he reread the top line of the email before moving onto the rest, but he honestly couldn’t believe it. He’d gotten into a college!

Whittier wasn’t one of his top choices, but it was definitely better than nothing (and better than only being accepted into UC Sunnydale). He was getting out of Sunnydale!

After he’d finished reading the entire email through twice, he sent a text to ask Cordy if she’d gotten an email too, before ringing Tony to tell him the good news.

Tony sounded half asleep when he answered the phone, but he quickly woke up when Xander announced that he was going to college. Tony was delighted, though unsurprised by the news (apparently Xander had had a ninety eight percent chance of getting accepted - Xander didn’t feel brave enough to ask about his chances with the other colleges) and, by the end of the phone call, Xander’s cheeks were hurting from having grinned so widely for so long.

When Cordy’s text arrived a few minutes, to tell him that she had gotten into Whittier too, Xander found himself dancing in excitement. Yes!

Weirdly, the knowledge that he’d been accepted into college and the previous night’s patrol with Faith seemed to actually help Xander work past most of his anger towards Buffy and Willow. It didn’t matter than they thought he was helpless, stupid and weak, because he knew differently. He’d been accepted into college, he’d killed a vampire on his own (even if he had used the VampTaser) and Faith had told him and Cordy that they were welcome to join her on a patrol anytime.

Besides, it had been two weeks since they had left him and Cordelia out and he could hardly stay mad at them for the rest of his life. Especially now that he knew that he would be leaving for college in about five months. Willow and Buffy might not have been his best friends anymore, but that didn’t mean that he wanted their friendship end entirely.

So, Xander left off his letterman jacket, sucked up his pride, and waited for them outside of school so he could begin to mend fences. It didn’t go as well as he’d hoped it would, mostly because he’d expected them to respond to his apology with an apology of their own, but by the end of the conversation Willow and Buffy seemed to have forgiven him for being a jerk (Willow’s words, not his).

Cordelia, who had opted out of being present for the apology (since she didn’t didn’t want to make up with them, and was against the idea of Xander apologising for something that he hadn’t done), was singularly unimpressed when Xander told her about the outcome of the discussion, but she did agree to honour the truce that Xander had negotiated - though only so long as Buffy and Willow honoured it too.

Faith was less easy to convince.

“Look, X, I don’t have anything against Red, aside from the fact that she’s boring as hell, and self-righteous enough to be a fricken nun, but I’m not just going to forget the fact that B lied to me.”

“You don’t have to forget about the fact that she lied to you,” Xander explained. “You just have to, you know, start talking to Buffy again. You’re the Chosen Two. You’re going to have start working together again sometime.”

Faith grimaced. “We’re supposed to go patrolling tonight. According to Wesley the vamps last night were from some kind of cult and are looking for the amulet that belonged to a big bad before he got killed off.”

Xander squinted at her. “And Wesley is…?”

“New watcher.” Faith shrugged. “He arrived today.”

“New watcher?” Xander repeated. “Why didn’t I know this already?”

“I guess B hasn’t forgiven you as much as she said she has.” Faith told him unsympathetically.

Xander sighed. “So, what’s this new watcher like?”

“Not evil, apparently.” Faith said. “I don’t know. He seems kind of cute. Like a little puppy who’s all excited and stuff, but needs some training.”

Xander’s eyes widened in surprised. “You’re actually going to work with him?

Faith shrugged again. “Yeah, I guess. The Oz’s have been going on about how great it will be for me to have a watcher who isn’t obsessed with B. I thought I’d give him a chance. It’s not like B’s going to.”

Xander winced, he could only imagine how miserable Buffy and Giles were going to make the new watcher.

“He seems to be working out of the library, which is weird.” Faith went on. “Maybe he’s worried that if he’s not there, we’ll just ignore him and keep going to Giles.”

“Buffy probably will, even if he’s right there.” Xander pointed out.

“No kidding.”

10-10-10

The next morning, before their first class, Xander and Cordelia met Faith outside school and walked with her to the library - to meet the new Watcher. They met Buffy outside the library doors entirely by chance, and Xander couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief when neither Cordy, Buffy or Faith made any kind of snarky comment.

Faith and Buffy pushed through the doors together, with Xander and Cordy following hand in hand, and then Xander got his first look at the new watcher.

“You were right, Faith.” Cordelia proclaimed. “He is cute.”

Xander wasn’t sure which reaction he preferred, Wesley’s gobsmacked expression, or Buffy and Giles’ grimaces.

“I know, right?” Faith smirked. “He’s like a little puppy, all excited and wriggly. Makes me want to take him home and cuddle him.”

“Eww!” Buffy protested.

Wesley made a small choking noise, before stepping forward and holding out his hand. “Wesley Wyndam-Price.”

“Cordelia Chase.” Cordy replied, shaking his hand with a smile. “And this is by boyfriend Xander.”

Xander stepped forward and tried not to enjoy the watcher’s disappointed expression to much. “Xander Harris.” He said, firmly shaking Wesley’s hand. “Welcome to Sunnydale.”

Giles cleared his throat. “So you got the amulet then?”

“Yeah,” Faith answered as though Wesley had been the one to ask the question. “Some vamps tried to get there first, but there only, like, six of them, so B and I handled them no problem.”

“Ah,” Wesley held out a hand. “May I see the amulet.”

Buffy pulled the amulet out of her pocket and passed it to Wesley - her reluctance obvious.

“Hmmm,” Wesley held it up to his eye. “Mister Giles, do you have a magnifying glass?”

Giles pursed his lips. “Of course.”

Wesley glanced towards him expectantly. “And may I borrow it?”

Giles gave a slight nod, before walking towards his office.

“Now,” Wesley put the amulet down on the table and picked up a notebook and a pen. “Tell me about these vampires.”

Xander exchanged an amused grin with Cordy. Was this guy for real?

“They were dressed the same as the three that me, X, and Cordy took out the night before.” Faith said simply.

Buffy shot Xander an incredulous look. “You took Xander and Cordelia patrolling?”

“Yeah, they were great.” Faith met Buffy’s eyes challengingly. “They each killed their own vamp and everything.”

Wesley and Buffy’s mouths dropped open simultaneously.

“You killed a vampire?” Wesley asked Cordelia, his tone awed.

Buffy snorted. “What’d Xander do? Fall over one of them with his stake out?”

Xander took one look at the way both Faith and Cordelia were drawing themselves up to defend him, before letting out an awkward laugh. “Yeah, something like that.”

Buffy rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Wesley. “Anyway, you were wrong about the cult being almost extinct. That’s nine vamps in two nights.”

Wesley confident expression slipped for a second. “Yes, well, I would expect you to be ready for anything.”

Faith grinned. “As I said, B and I handled them no problem.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Xander assured the man. “It’s not like Giles hasn’t given Buffy wrong information in the past.”

Buffy turned to glare at him, as Giles returned with a magnifying glass in hand. “He has not!”

Xander shot her an incredulous look, before affecting his best british accent. “No, Buffy, there’s no way they will be able to raise the Master. Don’t worry, Buffy, I’m sure it’s just a cold.” He winced at the furious glares on both Buffy and Giles’ faces. “Anyway, what’s going on with the amulet, Wes?”

Wesley blinked in confusion, but then seemed to catch on. He picked up the amulet and the magnifying glass that Giles had placed on the table and brought them up to his eyes. “Well, it certainly seems to be authentic, though more tests will have to be performed of course.”

“Of course.” Giles echoed dryly, as the school bell rang.

“So what do we do with it then?” Faith asked.

Wesley set down the magnifying glass and closed his hand around the amulet. “I will keep it safe from the demons who are seeking it.”

Buffy snorted. “You’re going to keep it safe?”

Wesley bristled defensively. “I will have you know that I have been extensively trained to…”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Buffy rolled her eyes, and picked her books off the table. “Anyway, I’ve got to go. I’ve got a chem test.”

Xander looked at his watch and winced. “Yeah, me too.” He turned to give Cordy a kiss. “I’ll see you in English.”

“Good luck.” Cordelia told him.

“Could we give it to Angel to look after?” Faith suggested, as Xander and Buffy left the library. “He’s the vampire with a soul…”  
10-10-10

Since it was a Thursday, Xander had his fight training with David after school. Despite the fact that his last training had only been two days before, Xander found himself more invested in the training than he ever had been before. Now he knew what a difference the skills David was teaching him made. He had not only been able to kick the vampire hard enough to be able to get away, but he’d also broken the vampire’s nose. Not to mention that, exciting as that was, he’d also been reminded just how much more he needed to learn.

Xander’s skills hadn’t been good enough and, if it hadn’t been for Tony’s VampTaser, he would have been dead. Admittedly, Faith had commented that the vampires they had been better fighters than most of the vampires she faced, but that didn’t matter to Xander. He wanted to be the best that he could be.

After training was over, Xander showered and then made his way to the school library to meet the others. According to the text that Cordy had sent him, Angel had told Faith and Wesley where the vampires (and their not so dead demon master) were holed up and there was an assault on the warehouse being planned for that evening. It was exciting stuff and there was absolutely no way that Xander was going to let Buffy leave him and Cordelia out of the action this time.

Everyone was already at the library when Xander arrived, even Angel, which was surprising since Giles still refused to have anything to do with the vampire who had killed him and tortured his girlfriend (a sentiment that Xander could understand, even if Angel was one of his friends).

“Faith and Wesley invited him when he gave him the information.” Cordelia whispered when Xander asked. “Wesley seems a bit confused about everything, but Faith convinced him that an extra fighter was never a bad thing.”

“Good for Wesley.” Xander decided.

In accordance with Wesley’s plan, which Giles and Buffy had reluctantly agreed with, the entire group left that library at quarter to seven and had gathered outside the warehouse. Wesley had attempted to protest the inclusion of Xander, Cordelia, Oz, and Willow, but not even Faith had backed him up on that one, and in the end Wesley ended up coming along too (though, only in reaction to learning that Giles was going to accompany them).

Xander felt bad for Wesley. He’d gotten a hard lot. Not only was he expected to come in and act as Faith and Buffy’s watcher, despite the fact that Giles was still around underestimating him at every turn, but he also seemed kind of new at it all. Not the research stuff, he definitely knew his stuff there, but with the practical stuff. He was like Giles, when they’d first met him, except not so good at fighting.

The assault on the warehouse ended up being almost completely uneventful. Buffy, Faith and Angel charged in through the main door, while Xander, Cordelia, Willow, and Oz followed behind them ready to stake any vampire who tried to escape, and Giles and Wesley stayed outside to keep watch.

Disappointingly not one vampire attempted to escape, apparently their loyalty to their disgustingly obese master was greater than their survival instinct, which left Xander nothing to do except watch his superpowered friends completely demolish an ancient cult of vampires.

Balthazar didn’t seem to be able to do anything except for shout in frustration from his pool, well, not until he decided to telekinetically summon Faith towards him. Xander hadn’t even known he could do that.

“Willow, do something!” Xander shouted, as Faith was pulled through the air towards the demon. Buffy and Angel both looked up at his yell, but they were too far away to do anything.

Willow blanched. “Like what? I can summon pencils, not people!”

Xander swore in frustration as he ran towards Balthazar’s bath, his hand digging into his pocket for the VampTaser. Once he was within ten feet of the bath, he aimed it at the demon’s chest and pushed down the button. The lightning forked across the room and hit Balthazar in the shoulder just seconds before Faith would have landed with her head in Balthazar’s lap.

“Thanks, X.” Faith acknowledged, springing to her feet. “Duck!”

Xander threw himself down so quickly that he almost landed on his face, but then he was rolling back up like David had taught him to and jabbing the VampTaser into the side of the vampire that had attempted to attack him. Then, before the dust had settled, he hightailed it back to his position near the door where Willow was staring at him open mouthed.

Whoops.

10-10-10

The fallout regarding the VampTaser wasn’t nearly as bad as Xander had expected it would be. (Though he hadn’t actually called it a VampTaser in his explanation - he’d called it a military grade taser and claimed to have stolen it from the army base.) Giles, Buffy, Willow, and Wesley had all been disapproving, both of Xander’s theft and the fact that he hadn’t told them about it before, but also impressed at the range of the weapon.

The awkward part came when Willow shyly asked if he could get anymore of them, and Xander had had to tell her that he didn’t think he could break into the Army Base again. He’d been very careful not to look anyway near Cordelia during that part of the conversation - he doubted anyone would react well to the news that he’d ‘stolen’ one for Cordy too. Which was understandable really and, if Tony hadn’t had his hangups about giving weapons to strangers (and teenaged strangers at that) Xander would have made sure to get one for each of his friends, but there was nothing he could do about it.

The next day was a Friday and, as had been their habit before, well, everything, Xander met Buffy and Willow at the Bronze after dinner. It wasn’t just the three of them, of course, it never was anymore, but Xander certainly wasn’t complaining about the fact that Cordelia, Oz, Faith and Angel were joining them.

It was nice, just hanging out and not fighting, and Xander wondered whether the lightness of the mood had to do with the fight the night before. Maybe Cordy was right and being in tense, life threatening situations did bring people closer together. Was that why he, Willow, and Buffy had been arguing so much since the beginning of the school year: because they hadn’t been patrolling together? It was a nice thought, because it meant that there was an easy fix to their seemingly irreparable relationship problem, but Xander knew that it wasn’t true. After all, he’d been getting annoyed with Willow back when they were still patrolling together every night.

They stayed at the Bronze until about eight, when Buffy and Faith both excused themselves to patrol, and the rest of the group decided to tag along for the walk. Patrolling in such a big group, was probably very uneffective, after all, what vampire would be stupid enough to attack seven people at once, but it was fun. And, despite how much the group had changed, it reminded Xander of the old days.

It was halfway through the first cemetery that things got weird and a skinny, white guy suddenly emerged from behind a mausoleum.

Faith and Buffy immediately pushed themselves to the front of the group, placing themselves between the guy and everyone else, and stood tensely - waiting for him to attack.

“Y-you’re the slayers, right?” The guy asked Buffy and Faith, his eyes darting all over the place.

“Yeah, and you are?” Faith asked roughly.

“A-alan Finch.” The guy said. “I’m the, uh, Deputy Mayor.”

Buffy lowered her fists. “Oh.”

Cordelia pushed her way past Angel, who had positioned himself directly in front of her. “Alan? What are you doing here?”

Alan flinched backwards. “Cordelia Chase?”

“Of course it’s me.” Cordelia said, and Xander just knew that she was rolling her eyes. “Why are you looking for Faith and Buffy?”

“You know this guy?” Faith asked in disbelief.

“Daddy used to have him over for dinner a lot.” Cordelia explained dismissively.

Alan’s eyes darted away. “And, uh, how is your father?”

“Awaiting trial.” Cordelia answered shortly. “Why are you here?”

“Awaiting trial?” Willow repeated quietly in confusion.

Xander glanced towards her incredulously. How could Willow have not heard the rumours about Mr. Chase? They were all around the school! But then, Buffy and Willow tended not to talk to anyone at school aside from each other, Oz, Xander, and Cordelia - none of whom would have brought it up in conversation.

Alan was wringing his hands. “I-I need to talk to the slayers.”

“Well, we’re here, and you’re here,” Faith pointed out. “So talk.”

Alan glanced nervously towards the rest of them, before his gaze darted around the cemetery. “You have to stop him.” He whispered eventually.

“Stop who?” Buffy sounded confused.

“The Mayor.” Alan answered, crossing his arms tightly over his chest . “He-he...you have to stop him.”

“Stop him from doing what exactly?” Buffy asked.

“There’s a dedication,” Alan uncrossed his arms, before crossing them again. “A ritual, to make himself impervious, he’s doing it tonight.”

“Impervious?” Angel asked. “Are you sure?”

Alan glanced up at Angel and blanched as though he hadn’t noticed him. “Y-y-yes.”

“There are only a few reasons why anyone would want to become impervious.” Angel commented in a low tone, though Xander wasn’t sure who he was talking to. “None of them good.”

“H-he’s preparing for his ascension.” Alan explained.

“Ascension.” Angel shook his head. “I’ve never heard of it.”

Alan glanced around the cemetery nervously. “I-it’s...he’s...he’s going to become a demon.” He whispered.

“We need to take him to Giles.” Buffy decided suddenly. “Willow, can you text him and ask him to meet us at the library.”

“Wesley’s our watcher now.” Faith reminded her.

“Wesley’s an idiot.” Buffy snapped. “We need someone who can actually help us.”

Faith pulled her phone out of her pocket and handed it to Cordy. “Text Wesley and tell him what’s going on. I wanna keep my hands free, just in case.”

It took them less than ten minutes to get to the school, since they they were only about five minutes walk from where Xander and Oz had parked their cars near the Bronze, so they bet both of the watchers to the library.

Alan, who hadn’t stopped wringing his hands and flinching at every sound, glanced around the room nervously. “Are you sure we’re safe here? Couldn’t a vampire just walk in?”

Xander wasn’t the only one who flinched at that. Too many people had died and gotten hurt in the school because vampires could enter freely.

“Just sit down and calm down.” Buffy instructed. “Giles should be here soon.”

Xander dropped down onto one of the slightly comfier seats that sat a few feet away from the table and smiled as Cordelia gracefully settled herself on his lap.

Giles arrived a few minutes later, with Wesley right on his heels, and then they listened to Alan nervously stutter out the story again - along with a few extra details. It basically all came down to the fact that the Mayor was an evil sorcerer and was planning on becoming a terrible demon, and that this was their only chance to stop him.

“Why didn’t you come to us earlier?” Giles asked in exasperation once Alan was finished. “Why wait until we have less than three hours to stop him?”

Alan just shook his head with a shudder.

“So what do we do?” Buffy asked Giles. “We can’t kill him, can we?”

“No,” Wesley shook his head firmly. “You certainly cannot kill him. Slayers are forbidden from taking a human life.”

Buffy shot him a vicious glare. “Says who?”

“The Watcher’s Council.” Wesley answered, drawing himself up. “And as their representative…”

“Who’s to say he’s even human.” Buffy interrupted him desperately. “I mean, no one human would want to become a demon, right?”

“I could kill him.” Angel suggested, though he didn’t sound happy about the idea. “It isn’t as though I haven’t done it before.”

Giles eyed him unhappily. “That may be our best option.”

“Couldn’t we just call the police?” Willow asked. “I mean, if he’s human…”

Cordelia scoffed. “And say what? That the mayor is going to turn himself into a demon?”

“No,” Willow denied. “That, uh, that…”

“This sort of things probably happened before, right?” Xander asked Giles and Wesley. “What happened then?”

Giles took off his glasses and began to clean them. “Typically, the Watchers’ Council would send in a team to arrest Wilkins and take him back to England for a trial.”

Angel took a step nearer. “And they have a prison that could hold him?”

“They do.” Giles agreed, returning his glasses to his nose “But it’s too late now.”

Alan shrunk away from Giles’ glare.

“So all we need to do is hold him until they get here.” Angel pointed out. “How long would it take them?”

“Fourteen hours.” Wesley answered for Giles. “Do you believe that you could hold him for that long?”

“Yes.”

Alan was shaking his head so quickly it looked like he was have some kind of seizure. “H-he has v-vampires. Mister Trick and…”

“Trick?” Faith interrupted, straightening up. “Black guy, kind of sleezy?”

“Y-yeah.”

Faith’s smirk was vicious. “He’s mine.”

Xander looked around the library. “So we should keep him somewhere that requires an invite.”

“That rules out the mansion. “ Buffy pointed out. “And I don’t want to worry Mom. Giles, could we use your house?”

Giles looked as though he had swallowed a lemon. “Of course.”

“Well, then,” Wesley drew himself up. “I will call the Council and request that they send a team.”

“We still haven’t discussed how we’re going to knock him out.” Buffy said to Giles, as Wesley left the room. “If he’s a sorcerer…”

“You’ll want him unconscious.” Giles agreed. “Yes.”

“Giles has drugs, right?” Xander asked. “He had that Cruciatus stuff.”

“Cruciamentum.” Giles bit out angrily, while Buffy looked away uncomfortably.

“Right, that.” Xander agreed calmly. “Well, do you have anything that would knock out an evil sorcerer?”

“Drugging him would makes things easier.” Angel pointed out.

“I do have something that should work.” Giles admitted with a sigh. “I don’t keep it here though.”

“Right,” Buffy started. “So Giles will go get his drugs and meet me, Angel and Faith outside City Hall.”

Willow frowned. “What about the rest of us?”

Buffy grimaced. “The rest of you should go home. There’s not going to be much for you to do anyway.”

“Seriously?” Xander asked incredulously. “You’re sending us away?”

Buffy looked frustrated. “Look, this isn’t going to be easy. Who knows how many vampires the Mayor’s got holed up in City Hall.”

“Exactly.” Willow exclaimed. “You might need our help.”

“I don’t want to be worrying about you.” Buffy told her gently. “Angel, Faith and I have this.”

“Why don’t we wait for you at Giles’ house.” Xander suggested, ignoring Giles’ startled frown. “I get that you might not want us at City Hall, a large group will make it a lot harder to get in and out without being seen on the cameras, but once you’ve got the mayor to Giles’ house you might want some backup.”

“Ooh, I could bring chocolate.” Willow exclaimed.

“Sounds great.” Faith commented, before Buffy could open her mouth. “Come on, B, don’t be such a party pooper.”

“It’s not going to be a party!” Buffy exclaimed frustratedly.

“Buffy’s right.” Giles put in. “It is very likely that it will turn into a siege. It would be safer for you to all go home.”

“The Council has approved our plan of action.” Wesley announced, reentering the room. “The team should arrive in Sunnydale at eight tomorrow morning.”

“Great,” Faith nodded. “We’re gonna drug the mayor till they arrive.”

Wesley looked impressed. “An excellent idea.”

10-10-10

As it turned out, capturing the mayor, and holding him until the Council’s team could get him, was a lot easier than any of them had expected. According to Faith they had only encountered five vampires at City Hall, all of which had been dispatched with relatively little trouble, and drugging the mayor had been a breeze.

Then they all crammed themselves into Giles’ living room (even Alan, since he’d been too scared to go home), with Faith, Angel, and Buffy taking turns standing guard at the two entrances, and waited for the seige to start.

And then it was eight am, and they’d eaten all the chocolate and crisps they’d brought with them, along with pretty much everything Giles had in his fridge and cupboards (except for the gross British stuff) and the Council’s team were bundling the mayor’s unconscious body into the back of their van, and they were still waiting for the siege.

It seemed way too easy and Xander spent the next week waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the Mayor to return or another Big Bad to rise up just to spite them, but nothing happened. In fact, if it hadn’t been for all the evidence of the Mayor’s corruption that had hit the media, Xander thought he would have started doubting that they’d got the right guy after all.

The scariest part of the whole thing meant that elections were going to be held to find a new mayor and, being eighteen, Xander would actually get to vote. It was terrifying! What if he voted for the wrong person? There was thing he knew though. No way was he going to vote for Alan Finch. The guy was a total wuss!

The best thing about the whole thing was that it seemed to have mended most of the tears in his friendship with Buffy and Willow - superficially at least. They were hanging out again and, so long as Xander made sure to avoid the long list of subjects that caused tension between them, everything was the same as it had always been. It was both wonderful and stifling, and there was only so much time that Xander could handle it. It made him gladder than ever that Tony and Cordy had convinced him to apply for college - he wasn’t sure he could have been able to handle it if there hadn’t been an end in sight.

Unfortunately, while Xander could avoid almost all of the subjects that upset his friends, it was practically impossible to pretend that he wasn’t friends with half the guys wearing letterman jackets. He hadn’t worn his own letterman jacket since three days before they’d overthrown the government (since there was no point in poking a bear that you were trying to get along with), but he wasn’t willing to stop acknowledging and hanging out with his friends just because it annoyed Willow and Buffy.

Most of the time it was just little things, one of the guys calling out his name in greeting when he walked past, Larry fistbumping him, someone congratulating him on having won the 200m freestyle at the last swim meet, or Percy shouting out an invitation to a party from across the hall (Xander was pretty sure that the basketball player did it just to piss Buffy and Willow off), but two weeks after they had overthrown the government things got worse again.

“I can’t believe you’re friends with that jerk!” Willow’s angry voice sounded suddenly. “Also, eww.”

Xander released Cordelia’s lips, and leaned his head back against the couch with a sigh. “Hey, Willow.”

“You guys know you’re not supposed to make out here, right?” Willow asked, as Cordelia gracefully shifted off Xander’s lap and onto the couch beside him. “It’s the Student Area.”

“I don’t see anyone complaining.” Cordelia pointed out, as Xander rubbed a hand across his mouth to make sure that there was no lipstick.

“That’s because they’re all too scared of you.”

Cordelia scoffed. “Or maybe it’s because they’re not all prudes like you are.”

“I’m not a prude!” Willow protested with a glare. “Oz and I make out all the time, just because we don’t act like we’re in a porno at school doesn’t mean that I’m a prude.”

Xander sighed. “Sorry, Wils, I guess I got a bit carried away. What were you saying?”

Cordelia glared at him, before standing up and straightening her skirt with a sharp tug. “I’m going to talk to Aura.”

Xander winced, Cordy hated it when he tried to placate Willow. Damn it, he should have just stood his ground.

Willow watched her leave with a disapproving frown. “I can’t believe you’re still dating her.”

“What do you want, Willow.”

“I can’t believe you’re friends with Percy West!” Willow snapped.

Xander went to run his hand through his hair, before remembering that it was filled with hair gel that Cordy had bought him and then taught him how to apply. He rubbed his mouth again instead. “What happened?”

“He’s making me write his History essay!”

“What?” Xander shook his head in confusion. “Why?

“Snyder is making me tutor him,” Willow explained agitatedly. “But Percy seems to think that means that I’m going to be doing it all for him. He’s such a jerk!”

Xander winced, yeah, Percy could totally be a jerk, but then so could Willow and Buffy. “I’ll talk to him.” He promised.

Willow’s mouth dropped open. “That’s it? How can you be friends with someone like that?”

“He’s not normally that bad.”

“Not to you maybe.” Willow pointed out, before shaking her head in disappointment. “I can’t believe you. The old you would never have dated Cordelia or been friends with Percy and Larry. Jesse would…”

“Don’t you dare bring Jesse into this!” Xander snapped, pushing himself to his feet. “Jesse spent most of our Freshman year running after Cordy and he would have understood that people change. Cordy, Percy and Larry have changed, they aren’t the same people who used to bully us when we were younger.”

“You’re the one who's changed.” Willow told him. “You’re not the same Xander who I met in Kindergarten.”

“No kidding.” Xander retorted. “You’re not the same Willow I met back then either.”

10-10-10

“Oi, Percy.” Xander called, waving the basketball player over. “Come here a minute, will you?”

Percy said something to the friends he was hanging with, before jogging over to where Xander was standing next to the main school building.

“What’s up?”

Xander sighed, he really wasn’t sure how to do this. “You know Willow’s my friend, right?”

Percy frowned in obvious confusion. “Willow? Oh, right, Rosenburg, yeah, Snyder’s got her doing my history stuff.”

“Actually, I’m pretty sure that he just wants her to be tutoring you.” Xander retorted. “You’d get kicked off the team if she wrote the essay for you and someone found out.”

Percy blanched. “What? But he said…”

“Snyder’s a dick.” Xander told him simply. “And you’re being one too.”

Percy looked offended. “What did you just say to me?”

Xander raised an unimpressed eyebrow. He’d faced off against vampires, demons, and Cordelia, Percy was nothing compared to them. “I said, you’re being a dick.” He repeated firmly. “Do you really want to be the guy who bullies people into doing stuff for them?”

Percy held his gaze for a few seconds, before looking away. “Fine, I’ll talk to Rosenberg.”

“Thanks.” Xander nodded. “And, Percy? Think about what I said, will you? There are lots of different kinds of people in the world, but they can all be put in two categories: dicks and good guys. Do you really want to be a dick?”

10-10-10

Thankfully, it only took Willow a few days to get over the Percy thing (though the fact that Percy started actually writing his own essay probably helped with that), and then things went back to normal between them. Well, as normal as they ever were anymore.

As March went on, Xander’s college letters slowly trickled in by the end of the first week of April, Xander knew that he hadn’t gotten into UCLA or Caltech, but that, as well as Whittier, he and Cordelia had both been accepted into UC Sunnydale, Pepperdine, and the University of Southern California. (Cordelia had also gotten into Berkeley, Duke, Colorado State, and Columbia.)

It was so much more than Xander had expected, especially getting into USC, and he wasn’t entirely sure how to handle it. How was he supposed to choose between four different colleges?

He didn’t tell anyone aside from Tony, Cordy, and Faith, though he wasn’t sure why. It felt a bit like the cork in the bottle of all his secrets. If he told Buffy and Willow that he was planning on going to college they would wonder how he was paying for it, and there was no way he could answer that question without admitting that Tony was his father and he definitely didn’t want to do that.

10-10-10

Virginia Potts had been working at Stark Industries for two years before she first met Tony Stark. She’d applied for the internship with their Finance Department straight after college and, after a year of interning, she’d been hired as a Junior Finance Assistant. It had been an amazing opportunity and would have probably guaranteed her promotions and a job with company for the rest of her life, but then she had found the error in Tony’s calculations.

She’d taken the error to her supervisor, only to be told to leave it be. Except, leaving things alone wasn’t something that Pepper did well (especially when they were going to cost someone thousands of dollars) and, after a few sleepless nights, she had used the threat of her pepper spray to force her way through Tony’s bodyguards to show him the error.

(In hindsight, it was possibly the most stupid and embarrassing thing that Pepper had ever done.)

Fortunately, Tony had been amused and impressed (rather than angry by the intrusion and defensive of the error) and had hired her to be his Private Assistant on the spot.

Pepper spent the first few weeks trying figure exactly what she’d been thinking when she’d agreed. Why had she given up a perfectly reasonable job as a Junior Finance Assistant to be the Private Assistant of a playboy who expected her to show his one night stands out of the his mansion?

Working for Tony was the weirdest, hardest, and most traumatising thing that Pepper had ever done, but, as she keep telling herself, it wasn’t as though she hadn’t hadn’t had any idea what kind of man Tony was. After all, she’d been reading about his exploits in the tabloids since she’d been a teenager.

Still, as time went on Pepper realised that there was more to Tony Stark than the world knew. The tabloids never mentioned how adorably scatterbrained he was, or how quickly and excitedly he talked, or how much he loved his robots. And they had never mentioned how kind and well-meaning he could be sometimes.

She’d been warned on her first day that Tony rarely kept a Private Assistant for more than a month, but somehow she made it past that milestone, and then past the next, and then past the next and, before she knew it, she had been working for Tony for more than five years and he was one of her best friends. (Not that she would have ever admitted that to him - it would have been both embarrassing and unprofessional).

Then he’d disappeared in Afghanistan, practically rescued himself, asked her to stick her hand into his chest, danced with her, almost kissed her, asked her to retrieve files from SI, saved her life, discovered he had a son, and suddenly everything changed.

Her mom had once told her that some men needed a woman to help them make the most of their lives. (And, embarrassingly, Pepper had daydreamed more than once about being that woman for Tony.) But, as it turned out, all Tony needed to become a good man was to be held captive by terrorists, be betrayed by Obie, and find out he was a father.

It seemed like Tony changed over night. He stopped drinking, attending parties, and bringing home women, and he turned his attention to building things for SI (and, of course, his Iron Man armour).

So Pepper adjusted, and got used to working for the new and improved Tony. She organised the Stark Science Symposiums, met Xander (who was adorable), and helped Tony as he struggled to give advice to his teenaged son. (Watching Tony try to figure out what advice to give without being too much of a hypocrite was actually quite amusing).

And then everything changed again.

She hadn’t understood what was happening at first. It seemed as though one day everything was normal between her and Tony, and then the next day Tony seemed to be reading off a completely different script. He was sweet, and flirty, and made up excuses for her to stay for dinner, and had a different gift for her every day, and she had no idea what was going on.

So, after a week, she confronted him about it (just as she’d done when she found the error in his accounting all those years before).

Tony dismissed the hologram he had been working with, looking more uncomfortable that she had ever seen him . “W-what?”

“The gifts, Tony,” Pepper reminded him. “I think you’ve given me more pairs of shoes this month than you have in the last six years. What’s going on?” She narrowed her eyes. “What did you do?”

“Nothing!” Tony answered quickly, way too quickly.

Pepper crossed her arms and gave him a stern look. “Tony.”

Tony winced, but he stepped towards her. “Do you remember this time last year?”

“I remember a lot of things from March last year.” Pepper told him. “Most vividly, I remember blowing up the R and D Department at SI.”

“No,” Tony shook his head. “Before that.”

“When I stole files off Obadiah’s computer?”

“Retrieved,” Tony corrected. “No, before that.”

“When I tried to resign?”

Tony was looking frustrated. “No, before that, when we danced.”

“Oh,” Pepper stared at him in confusion, before she finally got it. The gifts, the dinners, the flirtiness... “Oh.”

Tony glanced away. “Look, I know that I’m not exactly boyfriend material, and that it’s probably a bit weird given that you sort of work for me.”

“I definitely work for you.” Pepper couldn’t help but point out.

“Right.” Tony nodded. “But, uh, the thing is that, uh, um, uh, I like you, in a non-boss like way, and I, uh..,”

Pepper’s entire body felt warm, and she was sure that she was probably blushing. Was Tony really saying what she thought that he was? Because if so, that was completely unexpected. She’d dreamed of it once or twice, of course, that Tony would one day declare his undying love for her (as ridiculous and unTony like as such a sentiment would be), but she’d been certain that it would never happened.

Tony was...Tony. Tony Stark. Billionaire, Genius, Playboy, Celebrity, and she was just Virginia Potts. Tony could have any woman in the world and when he eventually settled down (if he ever did) she had been sure that it would be with a woman like his mother (from old money), or a model, or maybe even another genius like Maya Hansen. Not her, never her.

“...with all that’s happened,” Tony was still talking, nervously stumbling over his words like the world’s most awkward (and cutest) schoolboy. “I, think, that I, uh…”

Pepper took pity on him. “Tony.” She stepped forward and placed her hands on his shoulders. “I like you too.”


	12. AccusatION

The best thing about having his own apartment, in Xander’s opinion, was getting to hang out with Cordelia with no one else around. And not just for the opportunities it gave them to make out. There was something about being able to lounge on the couch with Cordy, her feet settled in his lap, looking through the different college materials - and not having to worry that someone might come along and interrupt them.

 

“I think USC’s my favourite.” Cordelia admitted, flicking through the colourful booklet that they had sent her. “Their Cheerleading Squad uniform is white and maroon, which are good colours on me, they have a good Theatre Programme  _ and  _ they have Greek Houses.”

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open. “You’re planning on joining a sorority?”

 

“Of course.” Cordelia told him as though it should have been obvious. She nudged his leg with her foot. “You should consider joining a fraternity.”

 

“I got enough of that when those frat guys hazed me in Junior year.” Xander told her with a shudder. “I would have thought you did too. They tied you up in their basement and tried to sacrifice you to a demon.”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Not all Greek Houses worship demons.”

 

“Maybe not, but most of them are jerks.” Xander returned. “Besides, I thought we were going to move in together?”

 

“I wouldn’t join a sorority that has a live-in policy.” Cordelia explained patiently. “Most sororities don’t actually force you to live with them.”

 

“Oh,” Xander hadn’t known that. “But why would you want to?”

 

“Aside from the instant popularity and the friends I’d make?” Cordelia asked. “How about the fact that it would look great on my CV?”

 

Xander shrugged. “I guess.”

 

Cordelia nudged him with her foot again. “I was serious. You should definitely pick a college that has fraternities and join one.”

 

Xander flicked through the different booklets in front of him. “I think that’s all of them.”

 

“I mean colleges with actual Greek fraternities.” Cordelia told him.

 

“Oh, well, I think that would just be UC Sunnydale and USC then.” Xander admitted. “But there is no way I’m joining a fraternity.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“You mean aside from the fact that they chained you up in their basement and tried to sacrifice you to a demon?” Xander asked.

 

“Well, it’s not like you were going to pick UC Sunnydale anyway.” Cordelia pointed out. 

 

“There is no way that I would get in.” Xander reminded her. “Guys like me don’t join fraternities, we get bullied by them.”

 

“Don’t be an idiot.” Cordelia told him sternly. “You’re totally fraternity material.”

 

Xander rolled his eyes. “Don’t you think you might be a bit biased?”

 

“Me, biased?” Cordelia snorted. “As if! Who was it that convinced Percy West to stop being a jerk?”

 

Xander smiled proudly. “I actually saw him stopping Guy from hassling a freshman yesterday.”

 

“Exactly.” Cordelia said smugly. “If Sunnydale High had a fraternity you’d be the president of it.”

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open. “Now you’re just being ridiculous.”

 

Cordelia’s expression suddenly became calculating. “How about when you get voted Prom King, you go to rush week at whatever college you choose.”

 

“Fine.” Xander agreed easily. “And when I don’t become Prom King, then you ever mention it again.”

 

Cordelia’s smirk was a bit unsettling. “Absolutely. So, what college are you thinking?”

 

Xander eyed her worriedly for a moment. What had he just gotten himself into? “Uh, USC? Maybe? It’s the best school I got into, and it has a Business School  _ and _ an Engineering School.”

 

“Not to mention that is has a good Swim Team.” Cordelia added. “And actual Greek fraternities.”

 

“No way am I trying out for the Swim Team.” Xander shook his head quickly. “I’m only joined our Swim Team so that it would look good on my college applications. Once I’m at college I won’t have to worry about it anymore.”

 

Cordelia frowned. “But you’re good!”

 

“Only because of the remnants of the fish DNA.” Xander reminded her. “Don’t college’s do drug screenings and stuff?”

 

“They don’t test your DNA.” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Besides, you only  _ think _ it’s because of the fish DNA. The doctors said that they got it all out.”

 

Xander shot her an unimpressed look. “You have another explanation as to why I’m suddenly good at swimming?”

 

“Well, you’re actually trying for once.” Cordelia pointed out. “I’ve heard that helps. Not to mention all the running you’re doing.”

 

“I’m not joining the Swim Team.” Xander told her. “And I’m not making you any deals about it either.”

 

Cordelia sighed. “Fine, but I’m trying out for the Cheerleading Team.”

 

Xander squeezed one of her feet. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

 

“And I’m joining a sorority,” Cordelia continued, before looking uncomfortable. “Unless...do you think that when Tony said he’d lend me money for all my college needs he meant this sort of thing?”

 

“Tony’s not lending you the money, he’s giving you a scholarship.” Xander reminded her.

 

“Which I’m going to pay back.”

 

Xander rolled his eyes. “You don’t have to, but, yeah, I’m sure he’d be happy to  _ lend  _ you the money to join a sorority. If he’s not, I’ll pay for it.”

 

Cordelia frowned. “Xander…”

 

“It’s not like I won’t get anything out of it.” Xander told her with a grin. “It means that I get to date a sorority girl.”

 

Cordelia looked amused. “And I’ll be dating a frat boy, so we’ll be even.”

 

“That’s much less likely.” Xander reminded her. “First I have to miraculously beat out both Percy and Hogan for Prom King, and then I actually have to be picked, or whatever they call it.”

 

Cordelia smirked. “I stand by my statement.”

 

11-11-11

 

“You’re late.” Cordelia commented the next morning, as she gracefully slid into the passenger seat of Xander’s car.

 

“Only by ten minutes.” Xander defended, watching his mirrors as he backed the car out of her driveway. “My run went longer than I expected.”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Seriously? The one morning I don’t run with you and you end up running late? Haven’t you heard of a watch?”

 

Xander grinned. “It was your fault you know. If you’d been there I wouldn’t have added an extra mile to my run, and I would have been running on time.”

 

“A mile?” Cordelia repeated. “That puts you up to how many now?”

 

“Seven.” Xander answered proudly. “But the last half a mile was painful. I don’t think I’ll be trying that too often.”

 

Cordelia checked the delicate silver watch she was wearing. “We’re going to be late for homeroom.”

 

“No, we’re not.” Xander said, speeding up slightly to get through a yellow light. “We’ll be just in time.”

 

“If we’re late, and I get a detention…” Cordelia trailed off threateningly. “I’ve got the Pep Rally at lunch and the game tonight - I do not have time for a detention.”

 

“You won’t get a detention.” Xander told her. “You’ve got Miss O'Reilly. She’s all about school spirit. If anyone’s going to get a detention it will be me. Mister Beech is always grumpier when there’s some kind of sporting event.”

 

Cordelia braced herself against the door as Xander took the corner quickly. “It would serve you right.”

 

“Maybe,” Xander admitted, quickly turning into the school parking lot. “But, look, neither of us are going to be late. We’ve got four minutes until the bell.”

 

He parked his car in his usual spot between Percy’s car and Hogan’s truck, which weirdly was still vacant despite most of the other spaces being full, before grabbing both his and Cordy’s bag and hopping out of the car. 

 

“You know,” Xander commented, as he and Cordelia began walking towards the school entrance. “We’d get to our classes a lot quicker if you weren’t wearing those shoes.”

 

Cordelia looked down at her feet and then up at Xander, a small smirk on her lips. “Are you saying you don’t like my shoes?”

 

“No,” Xander denied quickly. “I love your shoes, and not just because of how good you look in them.”

 

“You mean how good my ass looks in them.” Cordelia corrected, though she didn’t seem offended.

 

“Well, yeah,” Xander admitted, throwing his arm over her shoulders. 

 

“I know, right.” Cordelia smiled smugly, wrapping her arm around his waist. “I could say the same thing about those jeans you’re wearing.”

 

Xander grinned proudly. “My morning runs are definitely good for something then.”

 

“Not to mention Tony’s money.” Cordelia agreed. 

 

“Shh.” Xander reprimanded, looking around to make sure nobody had heard.

 

“Oh please,” Cordelia rolled her eyes. “It’s only suspicious when you look around like that. I could have been talking about my cousin.”

 

“You don’t have a cousin called Tony,” Xander frowned. “Do you? Have I forgotten one of them? There’s Andrew, Samantha, Brittany…” He counted off on his fingers.

 

“No, I don’t have a cousin named Tony.” Cordelia sighed. “But they don’t know that.”

 

“Oh, right.” Xander grimaced, as they walked into the school. “Good point.”

 

“Good swim last week, Xander!” A kid, who Xander had never seen before, commented suddenly.

 

Xander looked down at him as the bell rang. “Uh, thanks.” He frowned in confusion as the kid’s face flushed as he spun back to his friends. “What did I say?”

 

Cordelia looked amused. “He’s awestruck, as he should be.”

 

Xander looked back over his shoulder at where the kid was whispering excitedly to his friends. “Awestruck, over me? Seriously? Cordy, I think there is something seriously wrong with you. Has someone cast a lovespell on you without me knowing it or something. First you think I’m frat material, then you think I’m going to be,” He lowered his voice to a whisper. “Prom King. And now this. You do know that you’re still dating me, right? Xander Harris, geek, dweeb extraordinaire.”

 

“Oi, Xan,” Percy exclaimed, suddenly appearing at Xander’s shoulder. “Did I hear you say that you’re joining a frat?”

 

Xander gaped at him. “What?”

 

“You said something about a frat.” Percy said, falling into step beside them. “So you’re going to college then? You haven’t said.”

 

Xander stopped in place and looked around worriedly. “Uh,”

 

“He is.” Cordelia answered. “But he hasn’t told the dweebs yet, so…”

 

“Got it.” Percy grinned, before miming zipping his lips shut. “So, which one, dude?”

 

“We’re thinking USC.” Xander answered quietly, after having made sure that neither Buffy or Willow were nearby. 

 

“Sweet!” Percy’s expression lit up. “Me and Larry too! We both got scholarships there. So what frat are you thinking about?”

 

“Uh…”

 

“Harris, Chase, West!” Snyder’s voice suddenly sounded behind them. “The bell has rung.”

 

Xander winced, before slipping his arm off Cordelia’s shoulders and turning around. Damn it, here came his detention. Except, Snyder was actually smiling - creepy though his smile was.”

 

“You wouldn’t want to get a detention that might get in the way of more important things, like basketball, or swimming, or cheerleading.” Snyder said, his gaze flicking between them. “Nice swim last week, by the way, Harris.”

 

“Uh, thanks?” 

 

11-11-11

 

Cordelia’s cheerleaders were definitely on point at the Prep Rally at day, though Xander thought that he probably would have enjoyed the event a lot more if he hadn’t chosen to watch it with Buffy, Willow, and Oz. Oz wasn’t so bad, he was just his usual self, but neither Buffy or Willow seemed to have woken up with an ounce of school spirit. Which, to be fair, wasn’t exactly unusual for them, and hadn’t been unusual for him either – pre-Senior Year.

 

Though at least they weren’t as bad as Freddie, the editor of the school paper. That guy seemed to actually have negative school spirit, and Xander definitely planned to have a word with him about describing the cheerleaders as ‘psuedo-prostitutes’ - because that just wasn’t cool.

 

Thankfully, Willow and Buffy wandered off partway through the rally (something to do with Buffy growing horns - which made no sense), so Xander was able to enjoy the second half without their grumbling. It did make him wonder though, did they grumble that much during the Swim Team Pep Rallies? When he was the one having his name spelt out and being applauded? (An event that he still found both terrifying and freakishly weird.)

 

The basketball game was that night and, wanting to actually enjoy the experience Xander chose to sit with Larry and some of their other friends, instead of Buffy, Willow and Oz. He’d sat with the scoobies during all of the previous games, but he’d found that their running complaints about everything from the cheerleaders outfits to the athlete’s attitudes took all of the fun out of the event. (Especially since Cordy was a cheerleader and he was friends with half the athletes they were moaning about.)

Sitting with Larry and the others was even more fun that Xander had expected, not only did it get him a seat closer to the action, but it meant that he got to enjoy the game without feeling like he had to pretend that he wasn’t enjoying it (and that he didn’t know half the people on the court).

“So, Xander,” Larry started, as they watched in appreciated as the Cheerleaders’ run through some of their routines after the second quarter. The squad’s improvement under Cordy’s leadership was impressive – not to mention how wonderfully bendy they all were. “I hear you’ll be joining me and Percy at USC come fall.”

“You did?” Xander asked with a grimace. “Damn it. Percy swore he wouldn’t tell anyone.”

Larry patted Xander on the shoulder with a laugh. “Yeah, Percy’s not definitely not the guy to tell your secrets to. Well, not if you don’t want them to be dragged out of the closet.” He said, before adding. “If you know what I mean.”

Xander winced. “Listen, Larry, you know that conversation we had around this time last year? The one where I told you that I knew what you were going through?”

“Yeah.” Larry’s expression was painfully sincere.

“I was talking about something completely different to what you thought I was talking about.” Xander admitted. “I thought you were…something else, but you thought I was talking about, uh, you know, but I’m not, I’m really not, not that I have a problem with you being, you know, but I’m not.”

 

“Oh,” Larry seemed to consider that for a few seconds, before smiling widely. “Well, that definitely explains you and Cordy.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Just out of curiosity,” Larry started. “What were you talking about that day if you weren’t talking about me being gay?”

 

Xander froze. “Uh, um, well…”

 

Larry laughed good naturally. “Don’t worry about it, dude. So, USC, huh?”

 

Xander breathed out in relief. “Yeah, seems like.”

 

“Did you get in on a swimming scholarship?”

 

“Nah,” Xander shook his head. “I don’t wanna swim in college.”

 

“So you go in on your grades?” Larry looked impressed. “That’s impressive, man.”

 

Xander shrugged. “It’s alright, I guess, just, uh, don’t spread it around too much, alright? I still haven’t told Buffy and Willow.”

 

“Yeah, Percy said something like that.” Larry acknowledged. “But, honestly, man, I think everyone is our crowd already knows, so you should probably tell them soon. News travels fast, you know?”

 

Xander did know, but he also knew that Buffy and Willow tended to be the last people in the school to hear any kind of gossip. They still didn’t know that Cordy’s dad had been charged with tax evasion over two months previously, which was frankly astonishing given how much that had been talked about around school.

 

“Percy said something about Cordy going too?” Larry asked, after a long silence. “I wasn’t sure she’d be going to college what with...you know.”

 

Xander eyed him sideways. He had a zero tolerance policy when it came to people trash talking Cordy and what had happened with her dad.

 

Larry raised his hands. “I’m not saying anything about it, man, I’m just asking the question.”

 

“Cordy got a full scholarship.” Xander explained simply. 

 

“You get one too?” Larry asked.

 

“Nah,” Xander shook his head, before wincing when he remembered that Larry had known him as a kid and knew just how little money his family had. Well, he supposed it was as good a time as ever to try out the cover story that he and Tony had cooked up for when he was at college. “You know how my uncle died and left me that car?”

 

“Yeah, I wish I had an uncle like that.”

 

Xander grinned. “Yeah, well, he actually left me a heck of a lot more than that. Enough for college and then some.”

 

Larry looked impressed. “Now I  _ really _ wish I had an uncle like that.”   
  


“He left me another car too.” Xander told him. “I can’t drive it here, it’d stand out too much, but you’ll see at USC.”

 

“Were you like his secret love child or something?” Larry asked incredulously. 

 

Xander choked. “Or something.” He wheezed out between coughs. “Apparently he didn’t want to split up his stuff and, since I was his oldest nephew, he gave it all to me.”

 

11-11-11

 

The next day was a Thursday, which meant fight training with David after school, but Xander knew that he needed to find the time to talk to Buffy and Willow. It was unlikely that they would hear about him going to college on the grapevine, since you actually had to be connected to the vine for that to happen, but it would be a disaster if they somehow did.

 

Not that it wasn’t going to be a disaster anyway. He should have just told Willow about Tony straight away, there was no way that she and Buffy were going to react well to the fact that he’d been keeping it from them. And neither should they. Xander knew he’d be mad if one of them had been keeping such a big secret from him, or at least he would have six months ago when he still considered them as his best friends.

 

It had been hypocritical of him to jump on Buffy’s back about not being a good friend when he’d been lying to them, he saw that now, but it wasn’t like he could go back and change it. And, in all honesty, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. Things weren’t perfect now, and they were about to get a hell of a lot less perfect, but they were still pretty great. Yes, he, Buffy, and Willow weren’t best friends anymore but, as sad as that was, he wasn’t convinced he wanted to go back to being the guy he had been a year ago. He liked his newfound confidence and his new friends, and he wasn’t convinced that he would still have had those things if he had told Willow and Buffy about Tony when he should of.

 

The more that Xander thought about it all, the more he doubted that telling Buffy and Willow the entire truth was the best move. After all, he was leaving Sunnydale in just over two months (since Tony was desperate to get him out of town as soon as possible and Xander wasn’t complaining), and Buffy and Willow were likely to be moving to whatever college they chose soon after. It pained him to admit it, but he seriously doubted that his friendship with them would survive long distance - it was barely surviving now.

 

So, maybe he should just tell them the cover story that he’d told Larry. They’d already bought the fact that his uncle had bought him a car, and at least that way he would only be admitting to having withheld about his inheritance - which wasn’t nearly as bad as not telling them that Tony Stark was his father.

 

“...der?” Cordelia’s voice broke into his thoughts.

 

“Yeah?” Xander answered, blinking away his thoughts.

 

“You just got a message.” Cordelia told him, from where she was leaning with her back to his side. “What’s with you today?”

 

“Nothing, I’m fine.” Xander answered absently, pulling out his cellphone.

 

The group around them chuckled.

 

“Sure you are.” Percy commented.

 

“You can be quiet now, Chatty Cathy.” Cordelia told him. “I swear, if you weren’t so good at basketball, I would…”

 

“Giles needs us in the library.” Xander interrupted her, reaching for his bag. “Willow says it’s urgent.”

 

“It’s a library.” Percy rolled his eyes. “How urgent can it be?”

 

Xander shrugged as he stood up and then helped Cordy off the grass. “Larry, Hogan, Aura, Gwen, Cathy,” He nodded to each of them. “We’ll see you guys later.”

 

Percy’s mouth dropped open. “Oh come on! You can’t call me that!”

 

“Sure we can, Cathy.” Cordelia smiled dangerously, straightening her skirt. “Right, Gwen?”

 

“Right.” Gwen eyed her boyfriend with a smirk. “It’s a good name on you, Cathy.”

 

“Harris!”

 

Xander grinned at Cordelia as they walked hand in hand towards the school. “Nice, how long do you think we can make it last?”

 

“A week at minimum.” Cordelia smirked. “It’ll teach him to gossip about us. What were you thinking about back there?”

 

“How to tell Buffy and Willow about Tony.” Xander answered with a sight. “Except, I’m thinking that maybe I won’t. That I’ll just tell them what I told Larry.”

 

“Why?” Cordelia asked.

 

Xander shrugged. “They’re going to freak. Which is understandable, I mean, I have been lying to them…”

 

“Withholding information.” Cordelia corrected.

 

“Willow would say that they’re the same thing.” Xander pointed out, as they entered the corridor that led to the library. “But the thing is that I’m not sure it’s worth it. Tony keeps telling me that sometimes highschool friends just drift apart when they go to college and, if that’s going to happen, is it worth making them freak now?”

 

Cordelia gave him a searching look. “And that doesn’t bother you?”

 

“Not as much as it used to.” Xander sighed. “Everything’s just so difficult with them now. To be honest, it would be a bit of a relief.”

 

They pushed through the library doors and headed towards the main table where Buffy, Willow, Oz, and Giles were waiting. It was nice, cozy even, and Xander realised that, difficult or not, he was definitely going to miss this when he and Cordy moved to LA.

 

Buffy whipped her head towards him. “What?”

 

Xander frowned. “What?”

 

“You’re moving to LA?” Buffy exclaimed.

 

Xander blanched. Damn Percy and his big mouth, and damn his own terrible luck. Of all the pieces of gossip Willow and Buffy could hear, it had to be the one about him and Cordy going to USC.

 

“You’re going to USC?” Buffy asked loudly. 

 

“What?” Willow asked, staring at Xander like he’d killed her puppy. “Xander?”

 

“Yes, to both questions.” Cordelia answered stiffly, squeezing Xander’s hand. “Is that what you called us here to talk to us about, because…”

 

“No,” Giles took off his glasses. “We called you here because it appears that the aspect of the demon that Buffy has gained is the ability to read minds.”

 

Xander’s stomach dropped in horror. No, no, no, this is was a catastrophe! There was no way he was going to be able to hide the fact that Tony was his father now.

 

Buffy frowned at him. “Xander, I’ve met your father. I know his name is Tony.”

 

Oh, good, Xander sighed in relief, the fact that his adopted dad had the same name as Tony was finally going to be useful. Buffy had no idea that the Tony he’d been talking about was Tony Stark.

 

“Tony Stark is your father?”

 

Damn it.

 

“What?” Willow was watching them like a game of tennis. “That can’t be true. Xander would have told us already, right, Xander?”

 

Xander winced. “Uh, well, actually, I, um, yeah, he is.” He admitted eventually. “I found out last summer, at the Science Symposium.”

 

Willow’s expression crumbled. “You’ve known about this since then and you didn’t tell us?”

 

Xander looked desperately between Cordelia and Oz, hoping that one of them would be able to save them. After all, they’d already had time to process the information.

 

“You told Cordelia and Oz before us?” Buffy asked, causing Willow to turn to her boyfriend with a betrayed expression. “And Faith  _ and  _ Angel? Hell, Xander, who didn’t you tell?”

 

Xander sent Oz an apologetic look, he hadn’t meant to get the other guy into trouble. “Everyone else. And everyone beside Cordelia found out by accident.”

 

Buffy crossed her arms. “Is that supposed to make us feel better?”

 

“A little.”

 

Willow was shaking her head. “You’re talking about a different Tony Stark, right? Not the really rich one, because that just…”

 

“Just what?” Xander challenged. “Why couldn’t Tony be my father? It’s because I’m not as smart as you, right? That was what you said when I got to meet him, that it should have been you since you were smarter.”

 

“No, I didn’t.” Willow was shaking her head. “I wouldn’t!”

 

“Yeah, well, you did.” Xander told her firmly. “And you wonder why I didn’t want to tell you that he was my father.”

 

Buffy stepped forward “And me?” 

 

Xander’s mind automatically jumped to the previous summer when she’d run to LA.

 

“Seriously?” Buffy snapped. “You can’t still be holding that against me!”

 

“I’m not.” Xander told her honestly. “But you asked why I didn’t tell you back then.”

 

“And what about the eight months in between?” Buffy challenged.

 

Xander’s mind flicked back to the comments she had made about Cordy, before he managed to put a stop to it. “You know, what? I’m not having this conversation with you right now. You have an unfair advantage. Get rid of this mind reading thing and then we’ll talk.”

 

“And what about me?” Willow asked angrily. 

 

“Personally, I’d rather wait until we can all do this together.” Xander admitted, he just hoped that it wouldn’t take too long. And that Buffy and Willow didn’t tell anyone else about Tony.

 

“And what if we do?” Buffy asked spitefully.

 

Xander stared at her, before shaking his head sadly. This sort of this was exactly why he hadn’t told her and Willow about it - exactly why he was looking forward to moving to LA.

 

“Then we’re done.” He told her seriously.

 

Buffy’s mouth dropped open. “You can’t mean that.”

 

Xander spread his hands openly. “Read my mind and tell me how seriously I meant it, Buffy. You tell anyone about Tony being my father and our friendship is over.”

 

11-11-11

 

Ideally, Xander would have been able to avoid both Willow and Buffy until they had the opportunity to really fight it out without Buffy reading his mind, but the Hellmouth never seemed to make room for Xander’s ideas. Not that it was Buffy or Willow or contacted him. Instead, Giles had rung him and, in clipped tones, explained that Buffy had heard someone planning mass murder and that they needed his and Cordelia’s help to investigate the suspects.

 

Thankfully, Buffy wasn’t involved (since her ability to read minds had led to her collapsing) so Xander only had to put up with Giles’ abruptness and Willow’s alternating devastated and furious expressions. 

 

For his part, Xander did his best to ignore the tension and just concentrate on the fact that someone wanted to kill a bunch of students. The interviewing of Willow’s suspect list was awkward, since both the people on his list seemed to know that he wasn’t actually on the Yearbook Committee; but, by lunch the next day, it was all done and they had narrowed the list down to Freddie - the newspaper editor. Who it turned out was just a moody dick (with no plans of committing mass murder).

 

In the end all their research was for nothing and it all came down to luck (as it often seemed to). Willow found a note from Jonathan and Buffy (who was apparently fixed) managed to talk him out of committing suicide, and some random Sophomore with diabetes walked into the kitchen to get his specially prescribed lunch and noticed the lunch lady pouring rat poison into the food. The poor kid had ended up with a nasty cut in his arm, from the lunch lady’s cleaver, but he had also gained hero status amongst his peers so Xander thought it was a fair tradeoff.

 

Personally, Xander could think of a lot worse things than getting sliced in the arm by a cleaver - things like walking into the library to deal with the fallout of Buffy’s mind reading revelations. This was really going to suck.

 

“No Cordelia?” Buffy asked shortly, as Xander walked towards the table. “And here I thought you two were joined at the hip these days.”

 

Xander clenched his jaw. “She has cheerleading practise. Besides we thought this would probably go better if she wasn’t here.” He glanced towards where Oz was sitting next to Willow.

 

Oz stood up. “That’s my cue.”

 

“No,” Willow protested. “Just because Cordelia isn’t here, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be. Besides, aren’t you mad at Xander too?”

 

“I already knew, remember? Besides, it’s not really any of my business.” Oz answered, before quietly leaving the room.

 

Willow’s expression hardened. “Just how long has he known about all this?”

 

“Since February.” Xander answered.

 

“And how long has Cordelia known?” Buffy asked, before tightly pressing her lips together.

 

“Since the night you got back from LA.”

 

Willow’s chin trembled. “And you didn’t tell us?”

 

“And Faith?” Buffy asked.

  
“Uh,” Xander frowned in thought, as he sat in the seat nearest him. “A few days before we took the SATs.”

 

“And Angel?”

 

“You remember the week that we thought Oz had killed someone?” Xander asked.

 

Willow frowned. “But we didn’t even know Angel was back then.”

 

Xander winced. “I, uh, actually found out a bit earlier than everyone else.”

 

“And you lied about that too.” Buffy accused. “Is there anything you haven’t been lying about, Xander?”

 

Xander rubbed his face in frustration. “Most things actually.”

 

“Well, it doesn’t feel like it.” Buffy snapped. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Xander told her tiredly. “At first telling you just didn’t seem right…”

 

“But telling Cordelia did?” Willow spat. “Cordelia? Of the ‘We Hate Cordelia Club’?”

 

Xander met her eyes. “Cordelia who just happens to be my  _ girlfriend _ ! Who I love.”

 

Willow and Buffy both grimaced and suddenly Xander was angry too.

 

“You want to know why I didn’t tell you about Tony?” He asked, pushing himself to his feet. “Because of that! Because whenever I do something you don’t like you get all disapproving about it. I love Cordelia,” He pointed accusingly as Willow’s expression twitched. “And you can’t let go of the past and be happy for me!”

 

“So you decided to lie to us about everything?!” Buffy asked, throwing out her arms.

 

“Not everything.” Xander denied. “I didn’t tell you about Tony being my dad, and I didn’t tell you other things that would have given that away, but that’s it. I’ve told you everything else.”

 

“Except that you’re going to college!” Buffy snapped. “I didn’t even know you’d applied to any.”

 

“Yeah, and did you ask?” Xander returned angrily. “You know, Buffy, if you’d looked out of your little Buffy-Bubble for one second you might have noticed that something was going on with me this year, but you didn’t. And, yeah, most of that is on me, but some of it is on you too - because friends are supposed to care about each other’s lives.”

 

“Buffy-Bubble?” Buffy repeated dangerously. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

 

“And what about me?” Willow stepped between them. “Are you going to accuse me of being in a bubble too?”

 

Xander stepped back. “When was the last time you asked me about any part of my life? When was the last time you asked to come over to my house? Wils, I moved out of home in October and you never even noticed!”

 

“You moved out of home?” Willow’s eyes widened.

 

“Yet another thing you lied to us about.” Buffy accused.

 

“Yeah,” Xander agreed. “But answer me this, Buffy. Would you have noticed if Willow moved out of home? Even if she didn’t tell you about it?”

 

Buffy looked offended. “Of course.”

 

Xander shot her a pointed look. “Yeah, because Willow’s your  _ best friend _ and I’m just the idiot who hangs around for the rare moments that you decide I’m useful.”

 

Willow reached out to touch his arm. “Xander…”

 

Xander stepped out of reach. “Don’t try and deny it, Wils. You and Buffy have each other, and I have Cordy.”

 

“No,” Willow shook her head violently. “You have me too. And Buffy! Cordelia’s just brainwashed you.”

 

Xander eyed her sadly. “What do I want to do when I grow up, Wils? You’re trying to decide whether to be a teacher or a computer programmer, Buffy wants to be anything other than a slayer, what do I want to be?”

 

“A…” Willow frowned, before her expression brightened proudly. “A fireman!”

 

“Not since I was seven.” Xander told her. “What’s my favourite subject?”

 

“Lunch!” Buffy answered quickly.

 

“Physics.” Xander corrected. “Willow can’t pick a favourite, but if she had to she’d probably go with computing. Buffy, your favourite was that Contemporary American Papers one you took last year.”

 

“Alright, we get it.” Buffy exploded. “We don’t ask about your life much. But that’s not just our fault, you’re the one who’s been lying to us.”

 

“Yeah, I have.” Xander agreed. “And again I say I’m sorry, I really am.”

 

Willow crossed her arms over her chest. “So tell us the truth now.”

 

“Alright,” Xander nodded slowly. “Tony Stark is my father, but he didn’t find out about me until March last year. He’s the one who bought me the car, and he bought me a house as well because he pretty much hates Mom and Tony Harris.”

 

“Where’s the house.” Buffy asked confrontationally.

 

“It’s the Crawford Street Mansion, actually.” Xander answered. “He remodeled the second floor for me. That’s how I found out about Angel being back.”

 

Buffy’s mouth dropped open. “What?”

 

Xander ignored her. “Tony and Cordy managed to convinced me to apply for college and I got into four different ones, but Cordy and I have decided to go to USC. We’re going to move in together in a apartment that Tony’s buying for us.”

 

Willow was shaking her head. “It’s like I don’t even know you anymore. You’re not the Xander that I met in Kindergarten.”

 

“So you’ve said before, Wils.” Xander sighed. “But that’s what growing up is. We can’t spend our entire lives never learning or growing. This is me now.”

 

“Well, what if I don’t like the new you?” Willow asked, her jaw set stubbornly.

 

Xander eyed her sadly. “Then we part ways and are always grateful that we had each other as a friend when we were younger.”

 

“You’d really do that?” Buffy asked, her eyes glistening. “You’d pick them over us?”

 

“Pick who over you?”

 

“Cordelia, Tony Stark, your new group of friends.” Buffy explained.

 

Well, yes, but, “I’m not picking them over you.” Xander told her. “You’re the ones deciding that you don’t like the new me. I’m picking me over you.”

 

“But you’d still be the old you if it wasn’t for them.” Willow protested. “They stole my Xander!”

 

“It’s not anyone’s fault, Wils.” Xander said softly. “It just is what it is.”

 

“You’re talking like you’ve already made up your mind.” Buffy told him, biting her lip.

 

Xander shook his head. “No, you guys are the ones who have to make up your mind.” He spread out his hands. “This is me, the real me. I love Cordelia and I want to marry her. I’m going to college in LA and, if Tony gets his way, I’ll end up the CEO of Stark Industries on day. I’m friends with Percy, and Larry, and Hogan, and a bunch of other guys. I’m also friends with Faith, and Angel, and Oz, and I’d like to be friends with you both as well.”

 

“You want to marry Cordelia?” Willow screwed up her face in disgust.

 

“You’re friends with Angel?” Buffy asked. “And Oz? How did we miss that?”

 

“I don’t know, Buff,” Xander sighed tiredly. “How did you?”

 

11-11-11

 

Overall, Xander thought that conversation with Buffy and Willow had gone pretty well. Nobody had cried, though Buffy and Willow had come close, nobody had gotten hurt (physically at least) and Buffy and Willow hadn’t entirely cut him out of their lives. Things were still tense between them all, but Xander didn’t really mind the way they were holding him at an arm’s length. In fact, he felt more relieved than anything. Everything was out of the open, he had nothing left that he was hiding from them, now it was up to them how the chips fell.

 

The rest of the fallout was thankfully very minimal. Willow was pissed at Oz for all of two days, before apparently deciding to let him off the hook for keeping secrets from her. Buffy confronted Angel about his involvement in the coverup, but they barely saw each other anyway so it didn’t make much of a difference. Buffy also confronted Faith, but given that the two girls hadn’t really gotten along anyway, and rarely worked together (especially now that Faith worked with Wesley and Buffy worked with Giles) nothing changed there either. Which was good, because the last thing Xander wanted was for his friends to end up in a difficult position because of him.

 

11-11-11

 

“Xander?”

 

“Yeah?” Xander looked up from his AP Physics revision questioningly.

 

“You said you got into four colleges.” Willow commented, pushing her hair behind her ears. “Which ones?”

 

“Whittier, Pepperdine, UC Sunnydale, and USC.” Xander answered.

 

“Oh,” Willow bit her lip. “D-did you consider going to UC Sunnydale?”

 

Xander eyed her searchingly, where was she going with this? “Not really. Why?”

 

Willow exchanged a look with Buffy and Xander’s stomach sunk. He doubted that this was going to be good.

 

“Buffy decided to stay in Sunnydale.” Willow explained. 

 

Xander frowned. “I thought you got in Northwestern, Buffy?”

 

“I did.” Buffy said. “And Mom was all about me going, but it just didn’t feel right. The Hellmouth needs me.”

 

“But Faith…” Xander started.

 

Buffy shrugged. “Faith’s good, but I’ll feel better knowing that I’m here protecting it.”

 

“Seriously?” Xander asked incredulously. “You’re turning down a good education so that you can micromanage?”

 

Buffy’s expression hardened. “No, I’m sacrificing what I want so that I can fight evil.”

 

“And I’m staying too.” Willow put in. “You said that I wanted to be a teacher, and you’re right, but I also want to help Buffy fight evil.”

 

“But you got into Harvard!” Xander reminded her. “And Yale, and Stanford, and…”

 

“UC Sunnydale isn’t not so bad.” Willow defended. “We’ll be able to choose our classes more than we would at a better college, and it isn’t as though I need to go to one of those schools to become a teacher.”

 

“What does Oz think about all of this?” Xander asked.

 

Willow looked confused. “What does Oz have to do with it?”

 

“Nothing.” Xander answered quickly. He couldn’t imagine choosing a college without having discussed it with Cordy. “So you’re both staying then.”

 

“Yeah,” Willow nodded, before exchanging another glance with Buffy. “And we were thinking…”

 

Xander swallowed a grimace. Damn it, this was not going to go well.

 

“...you should stay too.” Willow finished.

 

“We know we haven’t exactly all been the best friends this year.” Buffy admitted. “Mostly because you kept lying to us,” She shook her head as though to refocus.  “But, anyway, we thought it would be cool if we could all go to college together.”

 

Xander eyed them cautiously. “But I’m going to USC.”

 

“We know that’s what you had planned.” Willow agreed. “But now that we’re staying in Sunnydale you can stay too and we can keep helping Buffy and…”

 

“What about Cordy?” Xander asked.

 

“Cordelia?” Buffy and Willow exchanged another glance. “I guess she could stay too, if she wanted to.”

 

Xander ran his hands through his hair in frustration, before grimacing when they came away sticky from the gel. “Guys, it’s nice that you thought of me,” He said carefully, wiping his hands on his jeans. “But Cordy and I are going to USC.”

 

Willow’s mouth dropped open. “What?!”

 

“Is it because you’ve already sent in the forms?” Buffy asked. “Because I’m sure that they would delete it if you asked them too.”

 

Xander shook his head. “It’s not that. It’s just that Cordy and I have made these plans and I can’t just back out of them because you want me to.”

 

“But the hellmouth!” Willow protested. “What about fighting the good fight?”

 

“I’m not the slayer.” Xander pointed out, with an apologetic look for Buffy. “And I’ve been talking to Tony about it and he’s pointed out that me fighting evil is a bit like me fighting gang violence - not my job, not my responsibility, and not something I’m trained for.

 

“It’s not that I’ll just walk past if I see a vampire attacking someone,” He added quickly when Buffy and Willow’s expressions darkened. “But I’m not going to go out looking for it. I think I need to leave that to the experts.”

 

“So you’re just going to leave?” Buffy asked angrily. “You’re just going to skip off to LA hand in hand with Cordelia and leave us here fighting evil by ourselves?”

 

Xander frowned. “Firstly, wasn’t it the two of you who were trying to leave me out of stuff a few months ago because it was too dangerous?”

 

“Well, yeah,” Buffy admittedly weakly. “But we were wrong.”

 

“And, secondly,” Xander continued. “Yeah, I am.”

 

Willow looked betrayed. “So when we graduate, that will be it? You’re going to choose Cordelia over us?”

 

“I’m going to choose my future over my past.” Xander corrected. “Whether you want to part of my future is entirely up to you.”

 

He winced as their expressions darkened further. He’d known that they wouldn’t take that well, but at least that was better than admitting that, yeah, he was choosing Cordy over them.

 

11-11-11

 

When Tony had first started his campaign to try and win Pepper over he’d given himself a thirty seven percent chance of it actually working, with a fourteen percent chance of her filing a sexual harassment complaint and resigning in a huff. So, when Pepper had confronted him about it and then kissed him, Tony had been overjoyed beyond compare.

 

Kissing Pepper was everything that he had ever dreamed it would be. Her body slotted against his perfectly (though he had already known that from when they had danced together the year before), her lips were soft, and she tasted better than any woman he had ever kissed before. It had been wonderful, and exciting, and then they’d talked a little bit, and he’d gone to sleep an almost deliriously happy man.

 

Then he’d woken up the next morning and reality had sunk in.

 

What had he been thinking trying to woo Pepper? Not only had it been a massive risk, but now that his wooing had paid off the risk of her walking out of his life was even greater. In fact, it wasn’t even a risk anymore - it was a forgone conclusion.

 

There was no way that his relationship with Pepper would last. He was too broken, too screwed up for any kind of woman to put up with him for long - let alone an amazing woman like Pepper. Sure they might date for a few weeks (or months if he was lucky), but eventually she was going to get sick of his bull and break up with him. Which wouldn’t have been so bad if she was any other woman, but she was Pepper! And when they broke up, she would resign and leave him forever. How would he live without her?

 

“Sir?” JARVIS’ voice broke through his thoughts.

 

“Mmm?” Tony asked, as he chugged down the breakfast smoothie that Dum-E had made him.

 

“Miss Potts has arrived.” JARVIS informed him. “She has asked me to inform you that she is waiting for you in the living room.”

 

Tony’s stomach twisted at the thought of Pepper, who he wouldn’t have in his life for much longer, and he set aside his smoothie. He wasn’t hungry anymore.

 

He took the stairs two steps at a time and forced a grin onto his face at the sight of Pepper watching the fish swim around the tank. “Morning, Pepper.” It was tempting to bound over and kiss her, but Tony forced himself to stop just out of arm’s reach.

 

“Good morning.” Pepper turned towards him with a smile, revealing the folder she was holding in her hand. “I think one of your fish is sick.”

 

Tony glanced towards the tank in concern. “Which one?”

 

“Um,” Pepper watched the fish for a moment, before pointing towards one of the red cichlids. “That one.”

 

“Oh, Reed Richards.” Tony said, taking note of the white spots that were now on the fish’s body.

 

“You named all the fish? Tony there’ve got to be at least a hundred of them.”

 

“Only the ones bigger than my hand.”

 

“And Reed Richards?” Pepper laughed. “Tony, did you name them all after scientists that you don’t like?”

 

“Just the ones that look like idiots.” Tony searched the tank for a specific fish. “You see that flowerhorn?”

 

“Tony, I have no idea what a flowerhorn fish looks like.”

 

“The ones who look like their brains are sticking out of their heads.” Tony explained. “I name the one with the smallest nuchal hump Justin Hammer, because he’s got no brain.”

 

Pepper laughed again. “When did you do all of this?”

 

“About a month ago.” Tony waved a hand dismissively. “I was bored and…”

 

“Drunk?”

 

“Maybe a little.” Tony acknowledged, it had been the anniversary of Obie’s death and alcohol had seemed like the best way of dealing with the memories.

 

“Anyway,” Pepper turned away from the tank. “We need to talk.”

 

Tony’s stomach dropped. “What?” Surely this way too soon for Pepper to break up with him. All his calculations had given them at least a ninety percent chance of making it to a week.

 

“Let’s sit down.” Pepper told him, gracefully sitting in the nearest seat and crossing her legs.

 

Tony sat in the chair closest to her and eyed her nervously. “What’s this about?”

 

“I think I need to resign.” 

 

Tony thought he was going to vomit. This was everything he had been scared of, except weeks too early. It hadn’t even been sixteen hours since they had kissed, what could he have done in that time to screw everything up?

 

“Come on, Pep,” Tony started, trying to inflect some lightness into his tone. “We’ve done this before haven’t we? You resign, I talk you around…”

 

“Tony,” Pepper interrupted him. “It’s...the thing is…” She swallowed. “I want this to work.”

 

“You want what to work?” Tony asked with a confused frown.

 

“This!” Pepper used her finger to indicate the two of them. “Us, and it’s not going to work if I’m working as your PA.”

 

Tony’s mouth dropped open. His brain had run hundreds of scenarios, but this had never been one of them. “But…”

 

“It never works.” Pepper continued. “We can’t be employer and employee  _ and _ be dating at the same time. Not if we want our relationship to survive.”

 

Which was definitely something Tony wanted, but he doubted that Pepper resigning would be enough to make it happen. 

 

“But I don’t even know my social security number!” He protested, for lack of anything better to day. It was a lie of course, and Pepper knew that, he’d had it memorised long before he’d met her, but still…

 

“We’ll hire you a new PA.” Pepper assured him. “And I’ll work with them to make the transition go smoother.”

 

Tony didn’t want another PA, he wanted Pepper! “But what will you do?”

 

“I don’t know.” Pepper admitted, her hand that wasn’t holding the paper folder fluttered unsurely. “I haven’t gotten that far yet, but maybe I could go back to what I was doing before I started working for you.”

 

Tony frowned. “A Junior Financial Assistant? Pepper, you’re way over qualified for that.”

 

“Not according to my C.V.” Pepper retorted. “I’ve been working as a PA, Tony.”

 

“Yeah, but you’ve been working as my PA.” Tony pointed out. “Surely that’s got to count for something.”

 

Pepper smiled. “Maybe if I wanted to work with small children.”

 

“Very funny.” Tony rolled his eyes. 

 

Pepper looked resolved. “I need to do this, Tony. I can’t date you and work as your PA.”

 

“So don’t work as my PA,” Tony told her. “Pick another job at SI. Any job. You can have Obie’s old one if you want to.”

 

Pepper smile was fond. “Tony…”

 

“I know!” Tony exclaimed, grinning excitedly. “You can run the Maria Stark Foundation.”

 

“Tony,” Pepper started again, shaking her head. “I can’t.”

 

“Of course you can.” Tony told her. “And it’s not like you’ll be putting old Angus out of a job either, you told me last week that he’s planning on retiring in a few months.”

 

Pepper sighed. “Tony, I don’t know anything about running an organisation.”

 

Tony waved a hand dismissively. “Yes, you do. You’ve been helping me run SI since Obie died.” He stopped suddenly, he hadn’t thought about that. “Crap, how am I supposed to run SI without you?”

 

“You’ll find a way.” Pepper assured him.

 

“Just like you’ll find a way to run the Maria Stark Foundation.” Tony pointed out. “You’ll be great, and you won’t technically be working for me anymore.”

 

“People will talk.” Pepper warned him. “They’ll say you just gave me the job because I’m your girlfriend.”

 

“Screw them.” Tony said before wincing. “Girlfriend sounds so juvenile. Can we just be dating? Or be partners? Or anything else that doesn’t make us sound like we’re still in highschool?”

 

Pepper was smiling fondly again. “If that’s what you want.”


	13. IdolizatION

Xander knew why taking his AP exams were a good idea, who wouldn’t leap at the chance to test out of some of their first year college papers? But that didn’t mean that he liked the idea of sitting six different exams in two weeks (especially since some idiot had schedule Prom for the weekend in the middle). 

 

He hadn’t even been planning on taking six exams, originally he’d only been going to sit three.

 

But then his AP English Literature and Composition teacher had reminded him that since he had taken AP English Language and Composition the year before he could take that exam as well. And then Tony had suggested that he sign up for the AP Physics C: Mechanics exam, as well as the AP Physics C: Electricity and Magnetism one, since he’d probably learnt most of the stuff by working through the projects he’d given him for his birthday.

 

Xander had been sceptical that six months of tinkering in his spare time (plus at least one hands on lesson in Tony’s workshop every fortnight) could have taught him everything he needed to know to take the AP exams, but he’d looked it up online and realised that Tony was right. There were a few parts of the theory that he had to teach himself, but otherwise he was confident that he would at least pass the tests (even if he was unlikely to score high enough in them to test out of the equivalent college courses).

 

So he was taking six exams, and paying just under six hundred dollars to do so. Which, twelve months before, would have seemed like an impossible amount of money to spend on anything, let alone for the chance of testing out of a college course, but these days it hardly seemed like any money at all. It was scary to consider how quickly he had gotten used to having money at his disposal. Especially when he considered how quickly Cordelia’s family had gone from riches to rags.

 

Thankfully, Xander only had two exams during the first week, Physics B on Tuesday afternoon and English Language and Composition on Wednesday morning, so he was feeling pretty relaxed when he arrived at school on the Monday morning. A feeling that lasted right up until he entered the school corridor and saw the Prom King campaign posters with his face on them.

 

Xander stopped in place and stared at his smiling face in horror. “Cordy…”

 

“Like it?” Cordelia asked, a small smirk playing on her lips. “It took me ages to find the right photo of you, but in the end I got Lisa from the yearbook committee to help me out.”

 

“Not exactly the words I would choose.” Xander admitted, though, to be fair, it was a good photo of him. It must have been taken at the Swim Meet they’d had in March because he was wearing his letterman jacket, with a black singlet on underneath, and there was a gold medal hanging around his neck. “You did this?”

 

“Of course.” Cordelia said, tugging his hand to get him moving again. “You didn’t forget our deal, did you?”

 

“Deal?” Xander asked, before his brain caught up. “Oh, crap. Cordy, you can’t be serious.”

 

“I’m always serious when it come to the subject of you joining a fraternity.” Cordelia told him.

 

“And what are Percy and Hogan going to think about me stealing attention from their campaigns?” Xander asked worriedly. “Remember how mad you got at Buffy?”

 

“That’s totally different.” Cordelia argued, stopping at her locker and unlocking it.

 

Xander leant against the locker next to hers. “How?”

 

“Firstly, you’ve entered because you want to win, not just to spite them.” Cordelia started, swapping out some of her books.

 

“ _ You’ve _ entered me because  _ you  _ want me to win.” Xander countered. 

 

“Eh,” Cordelia dismissed his point with a wave of her hand. “And secondly, because you’re actually a member of this school, instead of a weird loner who only gets involved when they want something.”

 

“Buffy’s not weird.” Xander protested.

 

“Buffy’s totally weird.” Cordelia shut her locked and hung her bag off her shoulder.

 

“Well, if she’s weird then I’m weird too.” Xander argued, as they walked the ten feet to his locker. 

 

“You  _ were _ weird.” Cordelia agreed. “But then I pulled you out of your weirdness and reformed you. Now you actually participate in school activities.”

 

Xander unlocked his locker and returned his AP English Lit and AP Calculus books, before placing his AP Physics and Chemistry books into his bag. “You know Buffy and Willow are going to freak when they see those posters, right?”

 

Cordelia sniffed haughtily. “They’re barely talking to you at the moment. Why do you even care?”

 

“I don’t really.” Xander admitted, shutting his locker. “Except there’s going to be yelling and disappointed sighs and they’re going to accuse me of having changed again.”

 

“You have changed.” Cordelia reminded him, straightening his collar. “I don’t even know why you still listen to them.”

 

“Because they’re my friends.” Xander answered, as he did at least once a week. Though the words were starting to sound less and less believable, even to himself.

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes as they began walking towards Cordys homeroom. “Right. Anyway, Prom King campaigns aren’t traditionally as involved as Homecoming Queen campaigns…”

 

“Which is good because I have an exam tomorrow, and one on Wednesday, and four next week.” Xander reminded her.

 

“Yeah, well, I have exams too, you know. Not to mention that I had the SATs the week after Homecoming and you didn’t hear me complaining, did you?” Cordelia retorted. “ _ Anyway _ , we’re going to be campaigning during lunch. So make sure that you meet me after your AP Physics class.”

 

Xander groaned. “Do we have to campaign?”

 

Cordelia speared him with a glare as they stopped outside her homeroom. “Yes, and don’t you dare try and torpedo my campaign just because you don’t want to take part in Rush Week.”

 

“Don’t you mean  _ my  _ campaign?” Xander asked, as the school bell rang.

 

“Are you the one who has spent the last month secretly planning the strategy?” Cordelia asked sharply.

 

“You’ve spent a month planning this?” Xander asked in horror. “Cordy, I know you want me to join a fraternity, but there’s no way I’m going to win this thing. It’s between Hogan and Percy.

 

“That’s what you think.” Cordelia looked amused. “I’ll see you in English Lit.”

 

12-12-12

 

Buffy and Willow were both in Xander’s homeroom class, but thankfully Mr. Beech ran a strict and orderly homeroom and (since Xander had slipped into the room just seconds before the roll had been called) they didn’t have the opportunity to hassle him about his posters.

 

Well, not until after class at least. 

 

“Really, Xander?” Buffy’s asked disparagingly, appearing next to his desk only seconds after Mr. Beech had dismissed them. “You’re going for Prom King? You?”

 

Xander rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, before standing up and throwing his bag over his shoulder. “Yeah.”

 

“Don’t you think the photos are a bit much?” Willow asked with a frown.

 

“Cordy picked it.” Xander admitted, as they walked out of the classroom together.

 

“You’ve got my vote, Xander.” Roy commented, holding out his fist as he passed them in the hallway.

 

“Thanks, Roy.” Xander answered automatically, bumping the football player’s fist with his own.

 

Buffy looked over her shoulder as Roy walked away. “You’re on first name basis with Roy Dukeshire? You know he bullied Michael during the whole witch hunt thing, right?”

 

“You know your mom tried to burn you at the stake during that thing, right?” Xander responded. “Everyone was doing stupid stuff that week, Buff. Roy’s not so bad.”

 

“Can we get back to the Prom King thing?” Willow requested. “It really doesn’t seem like a Xandery kind of thing to do. Did Cordelia put you up to it?”

 

“Yeah, sort of,” Xander admitted with a grin. “We have this deal. If I win, I’ll try and join a fraternity at college, but if I lose then I don’t have to.”

 

Buffy and Willow both frowned. “A fraternity?”

 

“She’s going to join a sorority.” Xander explained.

 

“Of course she is.” Willow muttered darkly.

 

Xander glared warningly at her. “And she wants me to join a fraternity, but I’m not so sure it’s such a good idea. So we made a deal.”

 

Buffy grabbed onto his arm and swung him around to face her. “Xander, you know you don’t have to do everything she wants you to do, right?”

 

“Of course I know,” Xander said, giving her a searching look. “But this is important to Cordy for some weird reason, and a happy Cordy means a happy Xander.”

 

Buffy and Willow exchanged a concerned glance, before Buffy tugged him to the side of the corridor.  “Xander, we’re worried about you.”

 

Xander looked between them. “Because I’m campaigning for Prom King?”

 

“I was talking to Mom,” Buffy started. “About how much you’ve changed this year, and how it seems like you’re this completely other person now, and she said that sometimes people change a lot when they’re in a unhealthy relationship.”

 

Xander’s mouth dropped open. “What?”

 

“My mom said the same thing.” Willow added quickly. “Apparently it’s really common for high school relationships to be, uh,  _ unhealthy _ .”

 

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Xander snapped loudly, before lowering his voice when the few remaining students in the hallway looked towards them. “You told your moms that I was in an unhealthy relationship?”

 

“No,” Buffy shook her head. “All we told them was about how you’d changed, they were the ones who figured out why.”

 

“Come on, Xander,” Willow entreated him. “We can help you.”

 

“I can’t believe this.” Xander told them, his hands curling into fists. “Cordelia and my relationship is not unhealthy, it’s perfectly healthy. Just because you don’t like the fact that I’ve grown up, doesn’t mean…”

 

Buffy snorted. “Grown up? Xander, Willow and I have grown up. You’ve had a...a lobotomy.”

 

“Oooh, nice word.” Willow exclaimed proudly, before seeming to remember what was going on. “She’s right, Xander. A year ago you never would have deserted the cause to run off to college.”

 

“Deserted the cause?” Xander repeated in disbelief. “What do you think we are, a gang?”

 

“What else would you call it?” Willow challenged him.

 

“Uh, how about making good life choices?” Xander asked, before lowering his voice. “You guys do remember that I’m probably going to end up running the _ family company  _ right? Don’t you think it might be useful for me to have a college degree under my belt to help with that?”

 

“So? You can still go to UC Sunnydale.”

 

“Not this year, I can’t.” Xander pointed out. “Admissions are closed.”

 

Buffy shrugged. “What’s one year? You could work, save up some money for college.”

 

“I have money for college. From my father.”

 

“But that’s not really your money, is it?” Buffy argued. “It’s your father’s.”

 

Xander crossed his arms. “Whereas you and Willow are paying for college out of your own pocket.”

 

“We’re getting off track again.” Willow protested. “Xander…”

 

“No,” Xander shook his head. “I don’t have time for this. I’m already late for class. So I’m just going to say this one more time. Cordy and my relationship is not unhealthy. We’re happy. We love each other. Why can’t you be happy for us?”

 

12-12-12

 

As it turned out, Cordelia’s planned lunchtime campaign activities were more enjoyable than Xander had been expecting. They didn’t have to hand anything out, or make any speeches. In fact, mostly they just involved her and Xander socialising with a whole bunch of people - almost all of whom Xander got along with anyway.

 

Willow and Buffy weren’t on Cordelia’s list though, which meant that Xander managed to get through the rest of the day without having to talk to them again. He couldn’t believe them! He could kind of see where Mrs. Summers and Mrs. Rosenberg were coming from, they barely knew him and they didn’t know Cordy at all. But Buffy and Willow knew both him and Cordy, how could they believe that their relationship was unhealthy?

 

He spent his time in the computer lab during last class googling the signs of an unhealthy relationship, just to make sure that he had enough information to be able to fight back if Willow and Buffy didn’t let go of their stupid theory, and was gratified to discover that he had been right. There was nothing wrong with his and Cordelia’s relationship. In fact, out of all the different lists that Xander read on the subject there were only two things that seemed to fit him and Cordy.

 

The first being how much he had changed since dating her, and the second being that Cordy often seemed to actively try to separate him from Buffy and Willow. But given that he didn’t miss his old self, and that his friendship with the girls had more than a few of the signs of an unhealthy relationship, neither sign worried him.

 

In fact, out of one list that had a total of fifty one signs of an unhealthy relationship, Xander and Cordelia’s relationship exhibited none of the signs, whereas his friendship with Buffy and Willow exhibited a total twenty four out of forty six that weren’t about sex, and parenting and that kind of stuff.

 

It was a little scary actually. He’d known that he wasn’t exactly enjoying his friendship with Buffy and Willow anymore, and that it was easier to hang out with Percy, Larry, and co., but he hadn’t realised that things between them were so unhealthy. And, yeah, part of it was his fault (especially regarding the sign about regularly lying and keeping secrets), but that didn’t make any of it okay.

 

12-12-12

 

Despite having an exam scheduled the next day, Xander met Faith and Cordelia at Gower Cafe after school. It was a weekly tradition they had started several months beforehand, when they had realised how easy it was to get busy and go a whole week without seeing each other. Between Xander’s swim team practises and fight trainings with David, Cordelia’s cheerleading practises, and Faith’s training with Wesley, Monday was the only weekday they could all get together.

 

It made Xander wish that Faith had chosen to attend school with them. If she had been at Sunnydale High they would have seen her everyday, not to mention how much he would have loved watching her interact with some of the guys. Still, he could understand why she she had chosen to go the homeschooling route. Not only did she seem to have had some pretty terrible experiences with her previous high school, but she was also a year younger than them and wouldn’t graduate for another year. At least by doing homeschool she could get her GED when she turned eighteen if she wanted.

 

Faith was already waiting for them at the cafe so, after Xander and Cordy had ordered themselves drinks (and two bowls of fries with ketchup), Xander told them about Buffy and Willow’s newest theory.

 

He’d barely managed to get the words ‘unhealthy relationship’ out, before Faith exploded with peals of laughter. Xander couldn’t help but join her. It was funny, in a sad, they’re crazy and our friendship will never recover, sort of way.

 

“Hold up,” Faith said, once she’d stopped laughing. “They actually said that?”

 

“They really did.” Xander agreed, shaking his head. “Apparently my and Cordelia’s relationship is unhealthy,” He paused as Faith burst into laughter again, before just deciding to go with it. “And they’re there to support me out of it.”

 

Cordelia didn’t look amused. “What is their problem?!”

 

“Well, blindness, apparently.” Faith snorted. “I mean, you two are the least  _ unhealthy  _ couple I’ve ever met, except maybe the Osbournes. Hell, even including the Osbournes. They’re great and all, they’re just a bit…”

 

“Hippieish?” Xander suggested, when Faith paused. 

 

“Yeah,” Faith shrugged. “Works for them though.”

 

“Did they tell you why they think our relationship is unhealthy?” Cordelia asked angrily. 

 

Xander reached under the table for her hand.  “Because of how much I’ve changed apparently.” He squeezed her hand comfortingly. “Don’t worry about it. They’re wrong.”

 

“Oh, I’m not worried.” Cordelia looked pissed. “Not about that anyway. Have you even considered how this might affect your campaign if word of it gets around?”

 

“Uh, no, not really.” Xander admitted. “But then I don’t really think I have a chance either way, so…”

 

Cordelia rolled her eyes. “Never mind. If it gets out I’ll just stomp on it like I did the rumour of you and Willow kissing.”

 

Faith’s eyebrows both flew up. “You and Red made out?”

 

“No.” Xander denied firmly. “There was absolutely no kissing, of any kind, between Willow and me. None!”

 

“Anyway,” Cordelia broke in. “I’ve got you a date to the prom.”

 

Faith looked discomforted. “You didn’t have to.”

 

“Just because you don’t go to school, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get to enjoy Prom.” Cordelia told her. “So you’re going to be Doug Jeffries’ date. Have you bought a dress yet?”

 

“Yeah, I bought one yesterday.” Faith’s smirk was unnervingly predatory. “You know black one we were looking at? With the slit up the side?” 

 

Xander had no idea what dress she was talking about but, judging by the look on Cordy’s face, Doug was going to be a happy man.

 

12-12-12

 

After their conversation on Monday, Xander expected Buffy and Willow to either spend the rest of the week trying to rescue him from Cordy or ignoring him, so he was more than a little surprised when Buffy confronted him before classes on Thursday morning.

 

“Did you know?!”

 

“Know what?”Xander asked, eyeing her aggressive body language cautiously.

 

“That Angel’s going to LA!” Buffy snapped.

 

Xander winced and turned to the guys who had been walking with him. “I’ll catch up with you later.”

 

Percy was eying Buffy with dislike. “You sure?”

 

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Xander rolled his eyes. “Go make out with Gwen or something.”

 

“Sure. I’d be happy to.” Bobby grinned.

 

Percy punched him in the arm. “He was talking to me, asshole!”

 

Xander waited until they were a few feet away before turning his attention back to a very impatient looking Buffy. “Yeah, I did. Angel mentioned it to me a few weeks ago.”

 

“And you didn’t think to tell me?” Buffy exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air. 

 

“No.” Xander denied. “Buff, you hardly see him anymore. Besides, aren’t you dating Garrity?”

 

Buffy shifted on her feet. “Not dating, plural, date, as in, he’s my date to Prom.”

 

“Either way, I didn’t really see how what Angel was doing was any of your business.” Xander told her simply.

 

“Xander, it’s Angel.” Buffy’s tone seemed to imply that should mean something to him.

 

“Exactly.” Xander agreed. “Angel who will lose his soul if the two of you get too close. Personally, I’m all for him moving to LA.”

 

“And I suppose that the fact that you and Cordy are planning are moving to LA had nothing to do with his decision.”

 

“Not that I’m aware of.” Xander shrugged. “He was planning on staying here, to support Faith when we all went off to college, but now that you, Willow, and Oz are staying, I think he’s decided to spread out the evil fighting team or something.”

 

“So he’s leaving because I’m staying?” Buffy asked. “What if I need help?”

 

“Then you’ll have Faith, Willow, Oz, Giles and Wesley to help you.” Xander reminded her. “Besides, LA is only a few hours drive away. Angel could always drive back if you needed him.”

 

“And what about you?” Buffy swallowed. “Would you come back if we needed you?”

 

“Of course.” Xander told her sincerely. “But, Buffy, you never need me. I’m the vulnerable one, remember?”

 

“That’s not fair!” Buffy accused, crossing her arms over her chest. “It’s been months since I said that.”

 

“And have you changed your mind?” Xander asked.

 

Buffy looked away. “It’s not that you’re vulnerable, it’s just that…”

 

“That I’m not a slayer, vampire, witch, werewolf, or watcher.” Xander finished for her. “I know. That’s why I’m getting out of the game.”

 

Buffy glared up at him. “Don’t make excuses. You don’t care about that. You’re leaving because of Cordy.”

 

Xander sighed. “No, I’m leaving because it’s the right decision for my future.”

 

“Stop lying to yourself!” Buffy spat. “And stop listening to Cordelia’s lies. There’s no way you would have chosen USC over UC Sunnydale if it hadn’t been her.”

 

“Buffy, USC is the fifth best college in the state.” Xander reminded her incredulously. “UC Sunnydale is number seventeen! Not to mention that it doesn’t have a School of Business.”

 

Buffy looked at him strangely. “You want to study business?”

 

“I’m considering it.” Xander nodded. “Either that or Engineering. Tony’s trying to convince me to do a double major, but I’m not sure.”

 

“A double major.” Buffy repeated flatly.

 

Xander tried not to feel too defensive. “Yeah, maybe.”

 

Buffy wrapped her arms around herself. “I can’t believe that you and Angel are leaving!”

 

“That’s what people do after high school.” Xander told her as gently as he could.

 

“They don’t have to.” Buffy said, looking up at him. “You wouldn’t be if it was for  _ Cordelia _ .”

 

Xander gritted his teeth at the venom in her voice. “Oh, screw you.”

 

Buffy’s entire body twitched. “What?”

 

“Screw you!” Xander repeated, as the school bell rang above him. “If I hadn’t been been dating Cordy, Tony would have still convinced me to go to college. And, yeah, I probably wouldn’t have gone to college if I hadn’t met him, but that’s not a good thing! I actually have a chance at a future doing something other than flipping burgers now. Why can’t you just be happy for me?”

 

Buffy opened her mouth, but Xander talked over her.

 

“And I’m only going to say this one more time: I love Cordy, I plan to spend the rest of my fricken life with her, and nobody gets to bitch about her in front of me. So if you can’t stop yourself, then feel free to never talk to me again.”

 

Xander glared down at Buffy, before looking around in shock when some of the other students in the corridor actually started applauding. Crap, he’d forgotten they were there. He looked back at Buffy’s stricken expression and tried to ignore the guilt squirming in his stomach. He didn’t regret anything he’d said, but he could have done without the audience. Though, really, Buffy had been the one to confront him in the hallway, so he guess that it was partly her fault as well.   
  


12-12-12

 

It wasn’t until a few hours later that Xander realised that the timing of his fight with Buffy had been just as much of a mistake as the location had been since it meant that he had to put up with being stared at for six whole hours. Buffy and Willow’s angry and wounded stares weren’t unexpected, but he wasn’t even sure why the other students cared so much.

 

By the time he had kissed Cordelia goodbye, since she was going to cheerleading practise, and gotten into his car to drive to the empty warehouse that Tony had bought for Xander’s fight trainings with David, Xander was ready for a good rant.

 

So, before he pulled out of the school carpark, he plugged his phone into the hands free device that Tony had installed in his car, and dialed his father’s number.

 

“Xander, hey!” Tony answered, after the third ring. “What do you think of them?”

 

Xander frowned. “Think of what?”

 

“Your tux and Cordelia’s dress.” Tony responded quickly, before pausing. “Oh, it’s only three thirty. Sorry, I thought it was later than that.”

 

“So David has them then?” Xander asked in relief. “Because Cordelia’s starting to get a bit...concerned that we don’t have them yet.”

 

“Concerned, huh?” Tony sounded amused. 

 

Xander laughed, already feeling the day’s stress drain out of him. “Yeah, a little. Though my campaign seems to be keeping her pretty well distracted.”

 

“And are you winning?” Tony asked, before scoffing. “What am I even asking? Of course you’re winning.”

 

“I’m still convinced that it’s going to be Percy or Hogan.” Xander said. “And my fight with Buffy this morning probably didn’t help my chances. Though Cordelia didn’t ream me out for it, so either she thinks it won’t be so bad, or she’s seen the light and has realised that I don’t have a chance anyway.”

 

Tony chuckled. “Somehow I doubt it’s the second option.”

 

Xander grimaced, as he stopped at a red light. “Yeah.”

 

“So, you fought with Buffy again, huh?” Tony asked. “Is this about the unhealthy relationship thing again? Because Pepper agrees with me that it’s all bull.”

 

“No,” Xander denied. “Well, yeah, a little, I guess. Mostly she was just upset that Angel’s moving to LA at the end of this year…”

 

“Yeah, about that.” Tony put in. “Are you sure you want to have a vampire living with you? Because I have to admit that I was really looking forward to not having to worry about you being attacked by vampires.”

 

“Me too.” Xander admitted. “But Angel’s much less likely to lose his soul without Buffy around.”

 

“So you’ve said before.” 

 

“And it would feel weird not to offer him a place to stay.” Xander admitted. “It’s not like he has any money.”

 

“What if you were to offer him the apartment next to yours?” Tony suggested.

 

“You mean so that he wouldn’t be able to get into our apartment if he did lose his soul?” Xander asked, already liking the idea. “And you wouldn’t mind that? It would mean that I would be spending more of your money to cover his rent.”

 

“It’s your money.” Tony reminded him. “Besides, I’ve been thinking that it would just be easier if I was to buy a place for you.”

 

“Not a mansion.” Xander told him quickly.

 

Tony sighed dramatically. “Fine, but otherwise you’re alright with the idea? Pepper said that I should ask you first.”

 

Somedays Xander still struggled to believe that this was really his life. “Uh, yeah, if you want.”

 

“Anything you’d like?” 

 

“So long as it’s not a mansion, or some fancy penthouse, I don’t really care,” Xander admitted, before remembering how extravagant a Tony without many limitations could be. “Uh, maybe a loft or something?’

 

“A loft?” Tony sounded disappointed. “Isn’t that just like a penthouse for poor people?”

 

Xander rolled his eyes. “A loft doesn’t have to be on the top floor. It just means that everything except the bathroom is in the same room.”

 

“What about the workshop?” Tony asked. “Because you definitely need a workshop and, if Cordelia’s anything like Pepper, which I think she is, she won’t want you leaving metal shavings all over the place.”

 

“The workshop can be separated.” Xander sighed. “How is Pepper, anyway? Things still going well between you?”

 

“Somehow.” Tony answered, sounding a bit confused. “Saturday is our two month anniversary.”

 

Xander grinned. “What are you doing for it?”

 

“Doing for it?” Tony sounded lost.

 

“What are you doing to celebrate it?” Xander explained.

 

“Do people celebrate every single month?” Tony asked incredulously.

 

Xander laughed. “No, just the first few. It doesn’t have to be big, but you should at least get her flowers or something. Cordy says it’s important.”

 

“Did she tell you that before or after you forgot a anniversary date?”

 

“Before.” Xander answered. “It was one of the many introduction to dating lectures she gave me during our first month together.”

 

“I don’t know whether to feel relieved or disappointed that Pepper hasn’t given me any of those.” Tony admitted. “There’s been a lot of lectures on how to treat my new PA though.”

 

“What’s he like?” Xander asked curiously, parking his car in front of the warehouse.

 

“Not Pepper.” Tony answered petulantly. “And a man! Can you believe that she made me hire a male PA?”

 

“Yes.” Xander admitted freely, unplugging his phone from the hands free device and bringing it up to his ear. “How’s her new job going?”

 

“Fine,” Tony sounded sulky. “Angus loves her and she says it’s going great.”

 

“Everyone wins then.” Xander commented, grabbing the bag that contained his exercise clothes out of the back. “Well, except for your PA who I’m sure you’re torturing horribly.”

 

“He’s not so bad.” Tony admitted, with a sigh. “He’s picked everything up really quickly and he laughs at my jokes. Not to mention that he gets along with JARVIS, Dum-E, and U.”

 

“So you have a good PA with a sense of humour and a hot girlfriend, or woman you are dating,” Xander corrected quickly when Tony made a disgruntled noise. “What exactly are you complaining about again?”

 

“Smartass.” Tony complained.

 

“Cordy certainly thinks so.” Xander quipped back, as he reached the door to the warehouse. “Uh, I have to go, I have training with David.”

 

“Fine, go, leave me to my misery.” Tony grumbled jokingly. “But ring me tonight, when you and Cordelia have seen the clothes, and tell me what you think.”

 

“Will do.” Xander promised quickly, before shutting off his phone and entering the warehouse.

 

12-12-12

 

The problem with Prom having been been scheduled in the middle of the AP exams, aside from making the entire week incredible stressful, was that it meant that Xander ended up forcing himself to spend the morning of the Prom studying instead of sleeping in. And while technically sleeping in wasn’t a requirement for Prom, Xander felt as though it should have been - especially considering the fact that the afterparty he and Cordelia had been invited was likely to last all night.

 

Nevertheless, by the time his clock declared it to be two thirty, Xander had managed to fit in five hours of study (most of which was for the two physics exams that he hadn’t taken the class for) and was feeling rather satisfied with it all. At least now he wouldn’t feel so guilty when he didn’t get much studying done the next day.

 

Not to mention that it still gave him plenty of time to prepare for Prom. There wasn’t much to do really, he just had to pick up the corsage and  boutonnière that he and Cordelia had ordered from the florist, shower, and get ready. But the florist closed at three thirty so he needed to pick up the flowers before then.

 

Unfortunately it seemed as though half the other guys in Senior year had either spent the morning studying too or, more likely, had slept in late.The line at the florists reached out onto the sidewalk. Which was annoying, especially since the polls for Prom King had closed so he couldn’t even use the opportunity to do some last minute campaigning.

 

The florist’s radio was on though and Xander entertained himself by quietly bobbing along to the music until the news came on. Apparently the new mayor, Gina Morrison, was already pissing some people off, there were some concerns about the future of Sunnydale’s CBD, and a Sunnydale High Student had been killed in an animal attack the day before.

 

Xander’s stomach dropped. In Sunnydale, animal attack tended to be code for ‘torn apart by a demon’. Did that mean that they were going to have to skip Prom to research? He flicked a text to Cordelia to ask, since he knew that she and Faith had planned to spend the afternoon having their hair and makeup done together, and was relieved to receive her reply to the negative less than a minute later. Apparently there had actually been witnesses to the attack, all of whom agreed that it had been a dog, so both Wesley and Giles had been willing to write it off as an actual animal attack. Weird.

 

Getting ready for Prom was a lot like getting ready for Homecoming, up to and including needing Angel’s help to tie his bowtie. In fact, the only differences seemed to be that he was wearing a different tuxedo and that he felt a lot more confident about the whole thing. Though whenever he thought about the stupid Prom King election his stomach would start twisting nervously. Who would have known that Cordy’s enthusiasm about the whole thing would have rubbed off on him? He still didn’t think he had a chance of winning, but he didn’t like the idea of disappointing Cordy.

 

Xander had arranged to have the limo pick him up from the school first so that he could leave his car in the parking lot for later. He’d expected that sitting in the back of the limo by himself would be weird, but it felt surprisingly normal. Something that Xander put down to the fact that he’d been chauffeured to Tony’s mansion by Happy about once a fortnight for over six months. Maybe he was just getting used to the idea of being driven by someone else. 

 

The limo stopped by to pick Doug up next. As much as Xander liked the guy, it was hard not to feel to jealous of how well the large linebacker pulled off his white suit. He tried to comfort himself with the knowledge that, knowing Tony, his tux had probably cost more than half his classmates’ cars. Unfortunately that just made Xander worry about accidently spilling something on it. Maybe he should try and stay away from any kind of food or drink.

 

They picked up Cordy and Faith next, both of whom had gotten ready at the Osbournes’, and Xander couldn’t help but grin when he saw Cordy step out of the door. She looked amazing, stunning, wonderful, beautiful, and incredibly sophisticated. 

 

“You’re beautiful.” Xander breathed, stepping closer so that he could gently kiss her, before slipping the corsage onto her wrist.

 

Faith came out of the door next and it was all Xander could do not to laugh at the expression on Doug’s face. Not that Xander didn’t sympathise because, man, Faith looked hot! The top of her dress barely seemed to cover her boobs and, despite the dress being floor length, the slit up the side was very high. 

 

“So you’re Doug?” Faith asked, looking him up and down. 

 

Doug swallowed. “Yeah, and you must be Faith?”

 

“Right in one, big guy.” Faith told him with a wink. “We ready to go?”

 

12-12-12

 

Getting dropped off at the Prom in a limo was pretty cool and, for a moment, Xander imagined that they were somewhere fancier than a Prom. Then he saw the decorations.

 

“I knew I should have joined the Prom Committee!” Cordelia commented scathingly as they both took in the red and gold balloons. “Imagine if Pepper had chosen a pink dress for me. I would have looked ridiculous next to those things.”

 

Xander didn’t disagree. “You know what the worst thing about going to USC is going to be?”

 

“Having to join a fraternity?” Cordelia asked, her eyes sparkling.

 

Xander ignored her. “Their colours are maroon and gold too.”

 

“Yeesh,” Cordelia grimaced. “Though at least the cheerleading uniform there is classy.”

 

“All the better for spilling food and drink on yourself.” Xander commented with a grin. “Come on, we should get some photos taken.”

 

Cordelia eyed the white arbour, covered with pink roses, with obvious distaste. “Oh, now they remember that there are more colours than just maroon and yellow. Did they not consider using yellow flowers? Or putting a white background behind it?”

 

Xander didn’t disagree. “At least this way we’ll be able to look back at the photo in twenty years and remember what an eyesore this entire place was.”

 

After they’d waited in line for ten minutes, and then had their photo taken, Xander and Cordelia made their way over to where Faith and Doug were standing with Percy, Gwen, Hogan, Aphrodisia, Guy, and Harmony. 

 

“Evening, all.” Xander greeted, wrapping his arms around Cordelia as she leaned her back against his chest.

 

“Cordy, your dress is gorgeous!” Gwen practically squealed.

 

“Hey, Xander,” Hogan nodded, his arm wrapped around Aphrodisia’s waist. He looked incredibly tall next to her and for a moment Xander wondered how they ever managed to kiss. Did she stand on a chair or something?

 

“It’s alright, for a dress that was pulled out of a charity bin, I guess.” Harmony commented, eyeing Cordy’s dress with a sneer. 

 

“And where did you get your dress from, Harmony?” Aphrodisia asked bitingly. “Whores Are Us?”

 

Harmony flushed in obvious embarrassment.

 

“We’ve been getting to know Faith.” Gwen told Cordelia, ignoring Harmony. “I can’t believe you’ve both been keeping her from us.”

 

Xander looked across at Faith and, underneath her interested sultry expression, he thought he saw the same confusion that he had spent most of the last six months feeling. The confusion that came from trying to figure out how he had ended up actually being liked by the popular kids.

 

“She’s so funny.” Aphrodisia agreed, looking up at Percy. “Right?”

 

“Yeah,” Percy said quickly, glancing towards where Faith’s dress was barely covering her breasts. “Funny.”

 

Xander rolled his eyes and tightened his arms around Cordelia’s waist. “So, are you enjoying yourselves so far?”

 

“It’s alright.” Hogan shrugged, looking over everyone’s heads. “I’m disappointed Dingo Ate My Baby isn’t playing. This band pretty much sucks.”

 

“I think Oz wanted to spend the night with Willow.” Xander said, before glancing towards Faith. “Right?”

 

“Yeah,” Faith agreed. 

 

Percy looked interested. “You know, Oz?”

 

“I sort of live with him.” Faith shrugged. “And his folks.”

 

“Really?” Gwen leaned towards her. “Is he always so straight faced?”

 

“Pretty much.” Faith gave her an odd look. “You into him or something?”

 

Gwen shook her head quickly, and leaned against Percy with a laugh. “No, I just always wondered.”

 

Faith looked up at Doug. “So, you wanna dance, or what?”

 

“Yes!” Doug agreed wide eyed.

 

The group was silent few a few seconds, as Faith and Doug moved away to the dance floor, but then Cordelia spoke up. “Can you believe the decorations in here? Aura, didn’t I tell you that we should have joined the Prom committee?”

 

It was about five minutes later, when Xander was considering asking Cordy to dance, when the sound of a guy screaming caught everyone’s attention. The sound made the hairs on the back of Xander’s neck stand up because he recognised that kind of scream. It wasn’t an excited scream, or a ‘crap, you scared me scream’, it was a ‘I’m going to die’ scream - and he’d been really hoping that he wouldn’t have to hear one of those at Prom.

 

Within seconds of the scream starting, Xander was already making his way towards the door where it was going from, and by the time the scream had been cut off Buffy and Faith were on either side of him. 

 

“Get back, Xander.” Buffy ordered quickly, as they approached the door the was already open an inch.

 

But, as three doglike things (that definitely weren’t dogs!) bounded through the door - blood dripping from their muzzles, Xander ignored her. This was exactly what he’d been training with David for. So that if he was ever in situation where there were three enemies and two slayers, he could actually be useful (and not die).

 

Faith reached the dogthings first but, as she was taking advantage of massive slit in her skirt with a side kick in the dogthing on the right’s face, Xander engaged the dogthing in the middle with a kick to the neck. 

 

From that point on things went almost too fast for Xander to keep up. While his kick pushed the dogthing back a few seconds, it didn’t actually seem to do it any damage and so Xander was forced to try and come up with another strategy and the dogthing bounded back at him. That kick should have snapped a dog’s neck, but clearly the dogthings had supernatural strength (as well as supernatural bad looks). But chances were something sharp would still get through his skin, since it didn’t seem to have an exoskeleton, and that didn’t mean that he wouldn’t be able to break some of it’s thinner bones.

 

Xander aimed a second kick, this time at one of the dogthing’s legs and was gratified to hear a snap. But that wouldn’t kill it, so he needed something sharp. Damn it, why hadn’t he thought to bring a knife? He really needed to find away to start carrying one of those around without it being obvious. 

 

The dogthing was coming at him again, though it’s broken leg was definitely slowing it down. Xander’s mind raced. What could he use? He was in a tux, there was nothing sharp about it, except…

 

Xander kicked out at the dogthing’s unbroken front leg, while his hands scrambled for the pin thing that was holding the flowers onto his tux. Once it was out and firmly in his hand, Xander dove onto the dogthing and, after having twisted around slightly, he shoved the sharp point into it’s eye.

 

The dogthing let out a sharp whine, before suddenly collapsing beneath him, but Xander still waited another few seconds before getting up. He didn’t want to let it up just to discover that it was play dead.

 

“Nice job, X.” Faith commented, offering him her hand up as the students around them suddenly burst into applause.

 

“Thanks.” Xander said, allowing her to pull him to his feet before pulling his jacket down. “How is it that you look just as good as you did a minute ago?”

 

Faith straightened his jacket for him. “Slayer power.”

 

“What the hell, Xander!” Buffy snapped suddenly, grabbing his arm and spinning him around. “I told you to get back.”

 

“Do the maths, B.” Faith told her. “There were three of them and two of us. If Xander hadn’t stepped in someone might of gotten hurt.”

 

Buffy glared at her. “What are you even doing here? This is a school prom, you know, for people who actually go to school.”

 

Hurt flashed across Faith’s face, before she was back to glaring at Buffy. “I would have thought you would have been grateful for some help, B.”

 

It took a few minutes to drag the dogthings’ corpses outside and under some trees, (and then watch Buffy beat the hell out of the fourth dogthing that appeared), and by the time that Xander and Faith followed Buffy back into the gym the Prom seemed to have gotten back underway.

 

Buffy was a few steps ahead of them, having ignored their presence since they had left the gym, and she stalked away to where Garrity and a few of his friends were talking to Willow and Oz. Xander exchanged an exasperated expression with Faith, before they made their way over to where Cordelia and Doug were standing with the same group as they had been before.

 

Xander returned to his position behind Cordelia, wrapping his arms around her as she leant back against him, and watched in amusement as Faith pulled Doug down for a long, hard kiss. Doug, who had watched her approach as though she was some kind of warrior princess, wasn’t complaining.

 

“What the hell were those things?” Hogan asked, his eyes flicking over to the doors the dogthings had come through.

 

“No idea.” Xander told him. “Faith?”

 

Faith ignored him in favour of continuing her impromptu makeout session with Doug.

 

“Don’t mind her.” Cordelia commented, resting the back of her head on Xander’s shoulder. “That kind of thing makes her hungry and horny.”

 

The group was silent for a few seconds as they watched Faith and Doug with an odd kind of fascination, before Percy seemed to shake himself out of it.

 

“Did anyone know that Xander could do that stuff?” He asked.

 

“I did.” Cordelia answered, earning herself an eyeroll from Percy. 

 

Xander shrugged. “Faith and Buffy are both a hell of a lot better than I am.”

 

“How did they get so good, anyway?” Gwen asked. “Buffy’s, like, freakishly strong.”

 

“Don’t you mean just freakish?” Cordelia snarked.

 

“They’re from a cult of warrior princesses.” Xander explained, with a straight face. “They get their strength from drinking a glass of blood from a human male every few days.”

 

“Ewww, really?” Aphrodisia asked, with a shudder.

 

Faith released Doug’s lips and turned towards her. “Well, it’s normally blood, but other bodily fluids work to - if you know what I mean.”

 

“No, not really.” Cordelia told Aphrodisia in exasperation. “They just work out a lot.”

 

Aphrodisia flushed. “Oh.”

 

Xander chuckled, as the music song finished. “Spoilsport.”

 

“Good evening,” An excited voice greeted them through the sound system. “And welcome to the 1999 Sunnydale Prom.”

 

Xander twisted his head around so that he could see what was happening on the stage and sighed when he saw Priscilla Andrews, the head of the prom committee, standing behind the microphone. He’d been hoping that they would leave the formal, award giving, part of the prom until the end - though at least this way he could get the ‘not winning Prom King’ part of the night out of the way quickly.

 

Except, Priscilla didn’t dive straight into the whole Prom King instead. Instead she waffled on for about five minutes about...well, Xander hadn’t actually been listening, and then they started giving out all the other awards.

 

Most of them were pretty funny, and it helped that Xander knew a lot of the people being awarded. Harmony won ‘Most Likely to End Up in a Reality Show’, and Katie Wexford won ‘Most Sassy’. Hogan won, ‘Most Likely to End Up an Olympian’, and Percy won, ‘Most Likely to Be a Millionaire’, since all that needed to happen for that was for his dad to die.

 

“Can you imagine everyone’s face when they find out that your dad’s richer than his.” Cordelia whispered in Xander’s ear. 

 

Then, just as Xander thought they were finally going to move onto the part he was dreading, Jonathan stepped forward and surprised them with a new category.

 

“Buffy Summers?” He asked, glancing around the room. “Though I suppose that after tonight we should probably give it to Xander Harris and, uh, the other girl too.”

 

Xander frowned as he looked around in confusion. What?

 

“This is actually a new category.” Jonathan continued. “First time ever. I guess there were a lot of write-in ballots, and, um, the prom committee asked me to read this.” He unfolded a piece of paper and read from it. “We’re not good friends. Most of us never found the time to get to know you, but that doesn’t mean that we haven’t noticed you. We don’t talk about it much, but it’s not secret that Sunnydale High isn’t really like other high schools. A lot of weird stuff happens here.”

 

“Zombies!” Someone called out.

 

“Those weird dog things!” 

 

“But, whenever there was a problem or something creepy happened, you, and I guess your friends, seemed to show up and stop it. Most of the people here have been saved by you or helped by you at one time or another. We’re proud to say that Class of ‘99 has the lowest mortality rate of any graduating class in Sunnydale history. And we know at least part of that is because of you, and Xander, and Cordelia, and Oz, and Willow, and I guess that new girl too. So the senior class, offers its thanks, and gives you, uh, this.”

 

Xander exchanged a bewildered expression with Cordelia as Buffy stepped forward to accept the sparkly umbrella. Since when had anyone at Sunnydale had any clue that weird stuff was going on? Normally they just seemed as though they were digging their heads into the sand like very, very stupid ostriches with a death wish. And if they were aware about it all, why weren’t they doing whatever they could to learn how to protect themselves (if not learn how to help fight). It was just weird.

 

“And now the moment you’ve all been waiting for,” Priscilla said, exchanging places in front of the microphone with Jonathan. “But first we need to recrown our Homecoming Queen - Cordelia Chase.”

 

Xander gave Cordelia’s hand an encouraging squeeze before releasing it. Then he watched in admiration as she walked towards the stage, the crowd parting before her like she was an actual queen, and then up the stairs until she was standing beside Priscilla. Then she ducked her head slightly so that Alistair could put place the tiara on her hair.

 

“Now,” Priscilla started, before anyone could begin cheering. “You may have noticed that we left one award out, and that’s because we wanted to award the next two awards together.”

 

A hand clapped Xander’s shoulder. “Congrats, man.” Hogan commented quietly.

 

“Lucky asshole.” Percy groused.

 

It was all that Xander could do not to gape in astonishment. Surely not. There was no way!

 

“So, drum roll please.” Priscilla requested, before waiting as a few of the students stamped their feet in some kind of bastardised drumroll. “Our Prom King, and the second half of our cutest couple, is…Xander Harris!”

 

Xander stared at her, before the sound of the students around him cheering startled him into moving towards the stairs up to the stage. Weirdly, the crowd parted for him just as they had for Cordelia.

 

“Don’t worry,” Cordelia murmured, while Alistair set the silver crown on his head. “You’re going to love being part of a fraternity.”

 

It was all Xander could do not to groan.

 

12-12-12

 

Tony had always loved choosing a new house to live in (though more often than not he ended up designing the house from scratch), and it turned out that choosing a house for Xander to live in was just as fun - even if the limitations that Xander had given him were annoying.

 

Though, admittedly, he could understand why Xander wouldn’t want to live in a mansion yet. Tony had been at college, well actually, when he’d been at college he’d been thirteen, but when he’d been Xander’s age he’d practically lived in the workshop that was attached to his mansion.

 

Despite that, Tony couldn’t for the life of him figure out why Xander and Cordelia would want to live in a loft. It just seemed so...boring, and small, and restricting and, within two days of looking for the perfect loft Tony regretted having asked Xander’s opinion at all. He should have just surprised him with a penthouse. 

 

The problem was that all the lofts seemed horribly small and the larger ones were grotty. So in the end, Tony just bought an apartment building, tore out half of the the fifth and sixth floors, and renovated the space into a massive loft. He felt rather proud of himself. It was definitely a loft, since despite there being two floors they were all part of the one room, it wasn’t a penthouse (since it wasn’t on the top floor), and it definitely wasn’t a mansion. Who said he wasn’t good at following directions?

 

Pepper, who had been the one to convince him to renovate an existing building instead of building an apartment building from scratch, seemed to find the whole thing more funny than anything. It was a bit weird really, since Tony was used to her finding that sort of thing exasperating, but when he asked about it she just said something about being relieved that it wasn’t her problem anymore.

 

But even Dapper Dan (or Daniel Cheong), the guy who had replaced Pepper as Tony’s PA, hadn’t seemed to have a problem with the idea of helping Tony secretly buy and renovate an apartment building in Los Angeles for no apparent reason. 

 

It was odd how quickly Tony had come to rely on his new PA (though he wasn’t planning on stopping with the complaints for another few weeks at least). Tony had definitely had his reservations when Pepper had recommended he hire Dapper, especially since his CV wasn’t half as impressive as a lot of the other applicants’.

 

Dapper was an American born Korean who had graduated from Penn State with a undergraduate degree in Communications specialising in Public Relations and he’d never had any PA experience (though he had interned with the Stark Industries PR Department the previous Summer). Tony wasn’t even sure how Pepper had known that Dapper would be any good (though he suspected that she’d hired him primarily for his PR skills), but she definitely hadn’t been wrong.

 

After only a month in the job, Dapper had already picked up most of everything he needed to learn and he was turning out to be almost as efficient as Pepper had been. The biggest difference between him and Pepper though, was that Dapper was ten times as subservient as Pepper had been. It wasn’t surprising, given that the kid was only twenty three, but it was odd to have an assistant who didn’t boss him around. Still, Tony thought he kind of liked it. (Especially since Pepper, JARVIS, and even Happy in his own quiet way, still bossed him around on a daily basis).

 

In fact, five weeks after Dapper had started working for him, the only times that Dapper had ever argued with him about anything had been related to PR issues and each time the kid had been annoyingly right with his advice (and, for the one time that Tony hadn’t listened to him, his prediction of the consequences - thankfully, Dapper had had some good ideas on how to clean the resulting mess up).

 

All in all, the transition had gone way more smoothly than Tony had ever imagined and, while it sucked not seeing Pepper every day, Pepper loved her new job and Tony loved the new relationship he had with her. A relationship that, somehow, despite the fact that they’d been dating for two entire months, Tony still hadn’t screwed up.

 

It was almost too good to be true.

 


	14. GraduatION

The month between Prom and Graduation went by way too quickly for Xander’s liking. First there were his four remaining AP exams, followed by a week of swim team practises and the final Swim Team Meet of the year, and then came the last ever finals that he would take at High School. 

 

By the time the week of finals actually came around Xander felt as though he’d done hardly anything beside study for exams in over a month. Thankfully, the weeks that he’d spent studying for his AP exams had actually been useful for his finals too.

 

“Your time is up.” Miss Jones told the class, as the clock struck three. “Please put down your pens and wait quietly for me to collect your papers.

 

“Woohooo!” Someone behind Xander whooped loudly.

 

“Quietly, Mister Hermez.” Miss Jones reproved sternly, though the corners of her mouth twitched upwards. 

 

Xander understood how Hermez felt. This had been their last final. They were done! There was nothing more they had to study for, nothing more they had to learn, no more exams that they had to sit until college. They were officially done. (Well, except for the three days that they had to attend school in the lead up to graduation)

 

Sitting quietly and waiting to be dismissed was always hard to do on a Friday afternoon, but it seemed especially frustrating now. Why did they have to wait for Miss Jones to collect their tests? Couldn’t she do that after she had let them go? 

 

Eventually, Miss Jones had all the tests in her hands and, after wishing them a good weekend, she dismissed them. What followed was the most desperate rush for the door that Xander had ever seen. A few guys actually knocked over their chairs in their hurry to get out of the classroom. 

 

Xander shook his head in amusement as the thin doorway hampered the students’ enthusiastic rush exit causing a bottleneck effect and giving Miss Jones the opportunity to force the boys to right their chairs. Eventually though, the entire class poured out into the hallway talking loudly.

 

“I can’t believe it.” Willow was exclaiming to Buffy a few steps ahead of where Xander was walking. “We’re done. Actually done.”

 

“I wouldn’t have thought you’d be so happy about that, Wils.” Buffy commented. “I thought you liked school.”

 

“I do.” Willow agreed quickly. “But I also like no-school, and there’s been so much school recently I’m about ready for some no-school time.”

 

“Me too.” Buffy agreed. “But then, I was about ready for no-school time about nine months ago.”

 

“Buffy, nine months ago you’d only just gotten back to school.” Willow pointed out.

 

“I know.”

 

Xander watched them walk ahead of his with an ache in his chest. If there was one thing he missed about the old Xander it was the easy friendship he’d had with Buffy and Willow. They’d barely spoken to him since Prom (a stark contrast to the rest of the school who constantly seemed to want his attention) and, according to Faith, who’d heard it from Oz, Buffy and Willow had taken his winning Prom King as a sign that their Xander was gone for good. Apparently there had even been a brief mention of searching for some kind of magical cure, but Giles had nipped that in the bud.

 

It sucked because, despite how bumpy their friendship had been all year, Xander had never thought that it might just end abruptly. Sure he was going away to college, and wasn’t planning on coming back very often (if at all), but he’d always thought that they would at least stay in some kind of contact. Even if that had just meant that they exchanged awkward emails once a month.

 

But now it seemed as though the longest friendship he’d ever had was over. Just like that. And, yeah, his life was definitely easier for it, and he didn’t regret anything that had led to this point, but it still made him sad.

 

Things had been so much easier a year earlier. Not that Xander wanted to go back to life before Tony, and he didn’t exactly miss living with the fear of Angel hanging over his head either. In was actually weird to think that school was about to break up for the Summer and there was no apocalypse in sight. There was no Master trying to open the hellmouth and no Angel trying to activate Acathla. Just a good, old demonless graduation.

 

“Oi, Xander!” Percy greeted, appearing suddenly at his shoulder. “You ready for tonight?”

 

“What?” Xander asked, before his brain caught up with him.

 

“Post Finals pool party tonight, my place.” Percy reminded him. “Come on, man, you said you were coming.”

 

“Cordy and I’ll be there.” Xander assured him. “No way Cordy and I would miss out on the chance to defend our shoulder wars’ title.”

 

“Great.” Percy’s expression brightened. “Do you know if Faith’s coming?”

 

Xander shook his head in amusement. As weird as he found it to be invited to the popular kids’ parties, Faith seemed to find it even weirder.  She’d been invited to almost every party since Prom. Something that Xander wouldn’t have found too surprising if the invites had all come from the guys (especially after Doug’s mind blown expression when he and Faith had eventually come out of the bedroom at Percy’s Prom After Party), but Cordelia had assured them that the Cordettes liked Faith too.

 

Faith had put it down to the Cordettes being brainless sheep who did whatever Cordelia told them too. But Xander knew there had to more to it than that. After all, the Cordettes hadn’t been too sheeplike to try and ostracize Cordy for dating him.

 

Percy’s face fell. “She’s not?”

 

“Huh?” Xander asked. “Oh, no, she is. I was just thinking about something else.”

 

“Finals are over, dude!” Percy clapped him on the shoulder. “We can finally stop thinking about stuff.”

 

“I don’t think that’s how it works.” Xander pointed out in amusement. “Besides, we still have three days of school next week.”

 

Percy waved a hand dismissively. “Yeah, but that’s for signing yearbooks and stuff - not actually thinking.”

 

12-12-12

 

Xander’s original plan for the afternoon had been to mooch in front of his TV and eat junk food. It had been one of the rewards that he had used to motivate himself to study and he’d been looking forward to it all week. But, despite the fact that he knew that there was no exam that he needed to be studying for, his mind didn’t seem to be on board with the mooching. It was annoying. Every few minutes Xander’s brain would remind him that he needed to be studying. Then he would feel guilty for a few seconds before he remembered that his exams were over.

 

So, half an hour into his planned TV watching, Xander gave up on the idea and made his way downstairs to work on the last engineering project that Tony had given him for his birthday - a wireless robotic arm.

 

The robotic arm was by far the hardest project that Tony had given him (and definitely the most time consuming) but Xander was almost halfway through making it and hadn’t gotten stuck yet. Despite the arm being bigger and more involved than anything Xander had made before, it didn’t require him to learn any new skills or techniques. Instead, it incorporated all the different skills that he had learnt through his earlier projects. It was incredible to realise just how much he had learnt over the last six months.

 

Once Xander reached the bottom of the stairs he knocked on the door that led to Angel’s part of the mansion.

 

“Come in.” Angel’s voice called.

 

Xander pushed open the door and stepped through it, grimacing at the darkness. “Mind if I turn on a light?”

 

“Go ahead.” Angel said. “I didn’t expect to see you today.”

 

Xander switched on the overhead light and saw that Angel had a book in his lap. Huh, he’d never considered how useful vampires’ night vision would be for reading in the dark.

 

“I had my last final today, but my mind is still all itchy.” Xander explained. “You mind if I work on the arm?”

 

“Itchy?” Angel frowned in confusion.

 

“You know,” Xander shrugged, wondering how to explain it. “Like it doesn’t want to sit still. It keeps telling me that I should be doing things, but I’ve got nothing I need to do. I was hoping that by working on the arm I could trick it into thinking I was actually doing something.”

 

Angel still looked confused. “By working on the arm won’t you actually be doing something?”

 

“Exactly!” Xander agreed, before glancing down at the book in Angel’s hand. “Whatcha reading?”

 

“The Annals of the Four Masters.” Angel answered, holding up the front of the book for Xander to read.

 

Xander squinted at the cover. “Annala na... I have no idea what that word is. Who puts a ‘g’ before a ‘c’?”

 

“GCeithre.” Angel pronounced for him. “ Annála na gCeithre Máistrí.”

 

”I have absolutely no idea what you just said.”

 

“The Annals of the Four Masters.” Angel said, his tone indicating that it should have been obvious. “It’s a collections of chronicles of Irish History.”

 

“Which you’re reading because you were born in Ireland?” Xander guessed. “Do people even speak Irish anymore?”

 

“Gaelic.” Angel corrected. “And, yes, they do.”

 

“Oh,” Xander considered that. “By the way, have you picked a date to move to LA? Cordy and I are planning on moving on the 1st of July, but Tony said that I should tell you that your apartment is ready whenever you want it.”

 

Angel stared at him. “My apartment?”

 

“Yeah,” Xander frowned. “You know, the apartment that you’ll be living in next to mine and Cordy’s. We talked about this.”

 

“No, we didn’t.”

 

“Yes, we did,” Xander protested. “And you said…” He searched his mind for the memory. “Oh, well, I meant to talk to you about it. I talked to Tony and he’s reserved the apartment next to mine and Cordy’s for you.”

 

“Why?” Angel was staring at him expressionlessly.

 

“Because I asked him to.” Xander explained simply, but Angel didn’t look satisfied. “Oh, you mean, why did I ask him? Because you’re our friend, as weird as that still is, and if we’re all going to be living in LA it makes sense for us to all live near each other. Besides, do you even have any money?”

 

Angel’s expression began to darken.

 

“Not that there’s anything wrong with having no money.” Xander added quickly. “I just thought it would easier for you if you had somewhere to stay. It’s not like you can actually get a job or anything, right?”

 

“Xander…”

 

“And it’s not like you haven’t been living in my house for the last nine months anyway.” Xander continued. “Besides, Cordy and I will both feel way safer if you’re close enough to kill any demons that might try and attack us.”

 

“Xander!” Angel repeated firmly.

 

Xander shut his mouth with a click. “Yeah?”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Xander perked up at that. “You’re welcome. Unless that was one of those ‘thanks but no thanks’ kinds of thank yous. It wasn’t was it?”

 

“No.”

 

“Oh good.” Xander grinned at him. “This is going to be great. So, when were you thinking about moving? You can wait to move with me and Cordy in a month if you like, or you could move now.”

 

“I’ll think about it.”

 

“Right good, you do that.” Xander told him, before wincing. He hated it when his words started to get a life of their own and refused to stop coming out of his mouth. “I’ll be over there, working on the arm...quietly.”

 

Much to Xander’s relief his mind seemed content to let him work on the arm without any guilt trips about studying and, by the time that it was time to get ready for the party, he had managed to get two solid hours of work in on the arm. It felt way more satisfying than mooching in front of the TV would have. No wonder Tony didn’t watch many movies and spent all of his spare time in his workshop.

 

Percy’s party was the perfect end to a week of finals. It was great to the have the opportunity to eat food, joke around, and play some pool games without the threat of school or tests hanging over their heads. Xander and Cordelia even managed to hold onto their Shoulder Wars’ title despite the fact that Faith had challenged them. Faith might have been a slayer, but Bobby - the football player she had chosen as her vehicle - had been worse that useless and had lost his balance the first time that Xander had head butted him in the chest.

 

13-13-13

 

On Saturday, Xander and Cordy both slept in until lunchtime, and then lounged around the mansion for a few hours until Xander needed to meet David for his fight training. Xander had been tempted to cancel the training as a reward for having finished with finals, but it wasn’t as though he didn’t enjoy the trainings. Besides, David was supposed to bringing down the keys to his and Angel’s apartments in LA.

 

After the training, Xander had a rushed shower, before meeting Cordelia at the Sunnydale High Athletes BBQ. The BBQ was great. Though it was a little embarrassing when the coaches called for their attention and began to wax lyrically about their star athletes who were leaving. It was especially awkward for Xander who knew that the only reason he was any good at swimming was the remnants of the shark DNA that he had been exposed to.

 

The BBQ officially finished at eight, but then Larry suggested that they carry thing on down at the beach. So they all piled into cars and took the party to the beach (and away from adult supervision) and it was after two in the morning by the time that Xander and Cordelia crawled into his bed back at the mansion.

 

Cordelia returned home on Sunday, since her mom got edgy when she stayed away for more that thirty six hours, and Xander spent the afternoon working on the robotic arm again. Angel, who had apparently decided to move to LA as soon as possible, spent the first part of the afternoon packing away the stuff he was planning on taking with him. There wasn’t much of it so then he sat on the couch and watched Xander work while he waited for the sun to set.

 

“You should say goodbye to Buffy.” Xander commented. “She’ll be upset if you don’t.”

 

“I said goodbye to her a month ago.”

 

“You told her you were leaving a month ago.” Xander retorted. “That’s different to a goodbye.”

 

“We’re not together anymore.” Angel said, sounding uncomfortable. “We haven’t been since last October.”

 

“You should still say goodbye.” Xander told him. “I’ve barely spoken to my parents since I moved in here, and I’m still going to say goodbye to them.”

 

“Buffy’s not related to me.”

 

“That you know of.” Xander grinned at him. “Who knows, maybe one of your cousins moved to America and had lots of kids, and one of them married someone with the surname Summers.”

 

Angel’s face took on a pinched expression. 

 

“But that’s not my point.” Xander continued quickly. “My point is that you and Buffy used to be close, like really, really close, and since you don’t completely hate each other, you should say goodbye before you skip town.”

 

Angel sighed. “Fine. I’ll stop in to see her tonight.”

 

“Good, she’ll like that.” Xander told him, turning his attention back to the screws that he was screwing in by hand. “And if you could not mention that you’re going to be living next to me and Cordy, that would be great.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because she’s pissed enough that we’re moving to the same city.” Xander pointed out. “The last thing I need is for her to know that we’re going to be neighbours again. She’d probably confront me about it in the middle of the corridor again.”

 

“I won’t say anything to her.” Angel promised.

 

“Thanks,” Xander grunted out the screwdriver in his mouth as he tested the finger joint that he had just screwed together. “ ‘ey, ‘oo a…” He spat the screwdriver into his hand before trying again. “Look at this, it bends just like a normal finger.”

 

13-13-13

 

The next two days of school were possibly the most boring two days Xander had ever experienced. Sure they were given their yearbooks in homeroom on Monday, and then got to pick up their graduation robes and hat, but it sucked to be at school with nothing to do. Skipping class had never been so tempting. But Snyder had told them all that anyone who was caught truant wouldn’t be allowed to graduate, so Xander forced himself along to his classes.

 

The only interesting part of the two days were their yearbooks and, by the time that school was let for the last time on Tuesday, Xander had counted the number of times he was in the yearbook (twenty seven), the number of times Cordy was in the yearbook (thirty one), and had exchanged more yearbook signatures than he’d known there were students. Of course, that meant that his own yearbook contained the signatures of the entire senior class (even Buffy and Willow), along with a whole bunch of random freshmen, sophomores, and juniors - some of whom he didn’t think he had ever seen before.

 

Graduation was the next day and, while it was exciting to be given his little scroll of paper that ensured that he’d never have to go back to highschool, it sucked that Tony couldn’t be there. Xander and Tony had spent a lot of time brainstorming different ways that Tony could have attended in some form or another, but in the end they had both decided that it would be too risky. So, instead, Tony had promised to watch the event live from the small camera that Xander had set up, and then Xander drove down to Malibu after the ceremony to celebrate with him. It meant missing Percy’s graduation party, but Xander knew there would be plenty more parties to enjoy in the month before he and Cordy moved.

 

13-13-13

 

“I can’t believe you’re ditching me here.” Faith grumbled, a few weeks later as she watched Xander packing up some of his things into a box. “With them!”

 

“Oz will still be here.” Xander pointed out. “You get along well with him.”

 

“I get along  _ great _ with Oz.” Faith corrected, kicking her feet up on the coffee table. “That doesn’t mean that I was to spent the next six months hanging around with Buffy and Willow.”

 

“Gwen and Aphrodisia are staying in Sunnydale too.” Xander reminded her, before noting her grimace. “I thought you got along with them.”

 

“I do. Sort of. In a boring as hell, but not as annoying as Buffy, kind of way.” Faith explained.

 

Xander winced. There wasn’t really anything he could say to that. “Wait, why six months?”

 

“I turn eighteen in six months.” Faith answered, as though it should have been obvious. 

 

“So…?”

 

“So I have a deal with the Osbournes and Wes that says I can move to LA then.” Faith explained.

 

Xander looked up from the box he was taping up in surprise. “You’re moving to LA?”

 

“You thought I was going to spend the rest of my life here playing the second string slayer?” Faith asked incredulously. 

 

“And you’re waiting until you turn eighteen?” Xander asked, impressed by her restraint. 

 

Faith shrugged. “The Osbournes have been great and I don’t want to just up and ditch them. So I promised I’d stick around until I’m all legal. Besides, Wes says I should wait and my GED. I think Giles is rubbing off on him.”

 

“And then you’ll come and hang out with me, Cordy, and Angel?” Xander asked, with a grin. “That’ll be awesome. I’ll talk to Tony about getting you an apartment next to our, like Angel’s.”

 

“Get an apartment for Wes too.” Faith ordered. “Otherwise he’ll probably insist on moving into mine to keep an eye on me.”

 

“Well, he is a watcher.” Xander laughed.

 

Faith made a face at him. “And I’m coming to hang out with Broody. You and Cordy will probably be all collegy by then and poor Broody will probably be driving himself insane with all the sulking. He’ll need someone to patrol with.”

 

13-13-13

 

Xander wasn’t sure how he was feeling as he and Cordy followed the moving truck out of Sunnydale and onto the highway. He’d expected it be exciting, but  it was also a lot sadder than he’d thought that it would be.

 

Sunnydale had been his home his entire life and now he was leaving. There was something final about it. Like it was the end of an era or something - which he supposed it was.

 

It was sad to think of all things (and people) from his past that wouldn’t be in his future.

 

There would be Willow or Buffy either - the only time they had spoken to him since Prom was when he had asked them to sign his yearbook. There wouldn’t be Giles or Oz either. Or the Crawford Street Mansion. 

 

Not to mention that Sunnydale had been where Xander had met Jesse. And it had been where Jesse had died. In a way, the town held all his memories of their times together. The ice cream parlour that they had eaten ice cream together. The Elementary school they had attended together. The playground where they had raced down the slide. And now Xander was leaving all those places behind.

 

Instead there would be college and Rush Week (since Cordy had won that bet). He would be living with Cordy, and next door to Angel (and in six months Faith and Wesley). Not to mention that one day he would have to admit that he was Tony Stark’s son and then, when Tony died in the very distant future, actually take over as CEO at Stark Industries.

 

He could be anyone he wanted and there wouldn’t would be anyone trying to force him to fit the mold that he had outgrown. He could do anything he wanted and there wouldn’t be anyone trying to hold him back.

 

It was almost scary how limitless his future seemed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear wonderful readers, I am very sad to announce that this is the end of ‘ION’. I had planned to write more in this series, but have since decided to permanently step away from the fanfiction world. I am getting increasingly busy and will be spending my writing time working on Original Fiction. 
> 
> What I am going to do though, is add one more chapter outlining my sisters and my plans for the rest of the series. These plans will be rough, and in bullet point form, but you’re welcome to read them if you want to. (You’re equally welcome to decide you’d rather let your own imagination finish the story for you.)
> 
> Thank you very much for all you wonderful encouragement and support. I have loved writing for you all. 
> 
> BakenandEggs


	15. Series Notes

(Please note that, unless changes are explicitly noted, Buffy canon stays much the same.)

 

**Freshmen**

Xander and Cordelia both are accepted in Fraternities

First year of college goes well (Xander can hardly believe it)

Spike gets neutered (as per canon), but starts getting to know Faith a bit

Xander goes back to Sunnydale over Christmas for one last attempt to mend fences, it doesn’t go well.

Faith and Wesley move to LA, Spike comes with her and ends up staying at Angel’s place

Oz breaks up with Willow (A oneshot tentatively entitled - Five times Oz wanted to break up with Willow, and the one time he actually did.)

Iron Man 2 happens, except differently. Tony and Pepper’s ongoing healthy relationship changes a lot.

Xander and Cordelia spent the summer travelling to all 50 states (Tony’s money helps)

**Sophomores**

Oz transfers to UCLA

Cordelia starts considering becoming a lawyer

Xander is doing very well at his double major (business and applied mechanics)

Faith finds out she’s pregnant from one night stand

Xander spends the summer interning at SI (his identity is still a secret)

**Juniors**

Faith and Oz start dating, move in together

Both Cordelia and Xander become presidents of their chapters

Captain America wakes up

Avengers happens - not identical, but similar. Xander tries to surprise Tony with a visit on the day it all goes down and so meets Loki while he’s waiting in the tower. Cue banter.

Faith has baby, Oz acts as baby’s father

Tony and Pepper get engaged

Iron Man 3 happens very, very differently!

Xander spends the summer interning at SI

**Seniors**

Cordelia takes LSATs and aces them

Cordelia applies for, and accepted into, Columbia Law

Cordelia and Xander get engaged while in a life threatening situation helping Faith and Angel take out a big bad.

(Avengers: Age of Ultron doesn’t happen)

Tony and Pepper get married - Xander uses this opportunity to  _ finally  _ announce his identity to the world.

Xander and Cordelia graduate from college and move to New York

**And then...**

Cordelia starts at Columbia Law

Xander starts at SI as Tony’s heir

Things are going really well, they live happily ever after etc.

Loki somehow turns up, emotionally damaged, not trusting etc.

Xander meets him randomly and they banter again. (Xander decides not to turn him into SHIELD)

An odd friendship forms between Xander and Loki and, eventually, Cordelia.

And so, Loki is healed and reformed, and helps the Avengers defeat Thanos.

(Also, Xander and Cordelia get married at some point, and have children, and really do live happily ever after!)

 

-

 

Anyone is welcome to write any/all of these stories OR a spin off in their own direction. My only two requests is that you keep the main pairings the same: Xander/Cordelia and Tony/Pepper, and don’t make them explicit.


End file.
